tag:theconversation.com,2011:/africa/topics/family-holidays-15246/articlesFamily holidays – The Conversation2022-08-26T09:51:07Ztag:theconversation.com,2011:article/1893472022-08-26T09:51:07Z2022-08-26T09:51:07Z‘Are we nearly there yet?’: why long car journeys are so excruciating for your kids<figure><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/481053/original/file-20220825-12-f8gfbd.jpeg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&rect=0%2C8%2C2695%2C1786&q=45&auto=format&w=496&fit=clip" /><figcaption><span class="caption">It's never long before the maddening refrain from the back seats. </span> <span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://www.shutterstock.com/image-photo/thoughtful-child-car-seat-looking-through-496740400">Travel_Master/Shutterstock</a></span></figcaption></figure><p>As we approach the end of the school holidays, parents across the country are saying the same thing: “If I had a pound for every time I heard ‘are we nearly there yet?’, I’d be rich.”</p>
<p>Having three young children myself, I know only too well the feeling of dread when, 30 minutes into a five-hour drive, the interrogation begins. </p>
<p>In our family, it starts quite politely. “Mummy, are we nearly there yet?” drifts over from the back seats. But this approach is rapidly replaced by an aggressive cross-examination, picking apart how much longer I previously said was left of the journey versus how long I am currently saying remains. </p>
<p>By the end of the drive, I have promised myself that I will never take them anywhere ever again. But why is it that journeys seem so excruciatingly long for children?</p>
<p>One reason is that our experience of time <a href="https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/16512313/">changes as we age</a>, often resulting in the sensation of time <a href="https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/20163781/">passing more quickly</a> as we get older. This is typified by <a href="https://www.keele.ac.uk/media/keeleuniversity/facnatsci/schpsych/weardenpublications/wearden2005.pdf">the sensation</a> that “Christmas comes around more quickly each year”. </p>
<p>Time is thought to pass more quickly as we age because, with increasing age, any duration of time becomes <a href="https://europepmc.org/article/MED/1178414">a smaller proportion</a> of our life to date. For example, at seven years old, a year is 14.30% of your entire life; at 70 years old it’s only 1.43% of your life. As such, a five-hour car journey may feel longer to a five-year-old than to a 50-year-old, simply because it is a greater proportion of the five-year-old’s life.</p>
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<figcaption><span class="caption">Science can tell us why time seems to speed up as we age.</span></figcaption>
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<p>But there’s more to it than that. As we age, we also develop a greater understanding of distance and geography. This knowledge provides us with markers and cues we use to understand how much of the journey is done and how much remains. </p>
<p>For example, on a journey from Manchester to Devon, I know that I’m roughly halfway there when we clear Birmingham, and this knowledge helps to structure the time for me. I also have access to the satnav, which provides an arrival time and warns me about upcoming delays. The absence of this knowledge in children means that they are more reliant on asking adults how long is left to judge the progress of the trip.</p>
<h2>No control</h2>
<p>Children’s uncertainty about how long has passed and how long remains is made worse by their lack of control over the journey itself. It’s the grownups who choose which service station to stop at and which route to take. This may also contribute to the journey dragging by for children. </p>
<p>This is because <a href="https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S1053810015300465">temporal uncertainty</a>, or the feeling of not knowing when something will happen, can slow the passage of time. As adults, many of us have significant experience of this. </p>
<p>Think back to the last time the train inexplicably stopped just outside the station, or when the “wait” sign flashed endlessly in baggage reclaim after a flight. I bet neither of these delays flew by quickly – and that an update from the train driver or airport staff would have been very welcome in these moments. It’s the not knowing, the <a href="https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S1053810015300465">lack of control</a>, that causes these events to drag. </p>
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<img alt="A man waiting for a train" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/481057/original/file-20220825-723-rlzyn4.jpeg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/481057/original/file-20220825-723-rlzyn4.jpeg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/481057/original/file-20220825-723-rlzyn4.jpeg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/481057/original/file-20220825-723-rlzyn4.jpeg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/481057/original/file-20220825-723-rlzyn4.jpeg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/481057/original/file-20220825-723-rlzyn4.jpeg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/481057/original/file-20220825-723-rlzyn4.jpeg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px">
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<span class="caption">Delayed trains are another source of temporal uncertainty.</span>
<span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://www.shutterstock.com/image-photo/cracow-lesser-poland-20-may-2022-2184471349">Daniel Sztork/Shutterstock</a></span>
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<p>When there is uncertainty about time, monitoring it becomes a priority. Humans have limited cognitive capacity and can’t pay attention to everything all of the time. We therefore <a href="https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0001691813002515">prioritise what we process</a> depending on our circumstances. </p>
<p>When time becomes uncertain we pay far more attention to it than normal, and this results in the sensation that time is passing much more slowly. Time is more often uncertain for children, so without something to distract themselves they’ll fixate on the progress of any journey.</p>
<h2>A watched pot never boils</h2>
<p>Finally, time in the car may drag for kids simply because they’re cooped up with nothing to do but stare out of the window. That’s a trial of boredom for children, while their parents in the front are likely savouring the opportunity to just sit and reflect.</p>
<p>Children’s desire for stimulation and entertainment means that boredom often sets in quickly, and this boredom also slows the passage of time. Like temporal uncertainty, our level of boredom affects our experience of time by altering the amount of attention that we pay to it. </p>
<p>When we’re bored, our persistent clock-watching makes time feel like it is <a href="https://www.semanticscholar.org/paper/What-happens-while-waiting-How-self-regulation-and-Witowska-Schmidt/20c301bb007f850699d5ea7fad5a19c2f58837ad">crawling by</a>. Conversely, when we are happily occupied, we pay little attention to time because our attentional capacity prioritises other things. As a result, <a href="https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/32628735/">time flies by</a> when we have fun.</p>
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<img alt="A child on a smartphone in a car" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/481058/original/file-20220825-20-30uc7j.jpeg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/481058/original/file-20220825-20-30uc7j.jpeg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=338&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/481058/original/file-20220825-20-30uc7j.jpeg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=338&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/481058/original/file-20220825-20-30uc7j.jpeg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=338&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/481058/original/file-20220825-20-30uc7j.jpeg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=424&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/481058/original/file-20220825-20-30uc7j.jpeg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=424&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/481058/original/file-20220825-20-30uc7j.jpeg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=424&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px">
<figcaption>
<span class="caption">The smartphone: sweet relief for worn-out parents.</span>
<span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://www.shutterstock.com/image-photo/cute-little-asian-20-months-18-1521308762">Stock photo by Yaa/Shutterstock</a></span>
</figcaption>
</figure>
<h2>Your next journey</h2>
<p>So what should parents do? Those of you yet to embark on the big getaway may already be rushing to stock up on games and snacks to provide a constant stream of distractions for your kids.</p>
<p>However, I would urge caution. Even if you do manage to reduce the “are we nearly there yet?” refrain, you may be increasing the risk of a new chorus: “I feel sick!” </p>
<p>Being covered in your child’s vomit, research and experience both suggest, is highly likely to make the journey <a href="https://europepmc.org/article/MED/31083698">feel significantly longer</a> for you.</p><img src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/189347/count.gif" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" />
<p class="fine-print"><em><span>Ruth Ogden receives funding from the Economic and Social Research Council and the Wellcome Trust. </span></em></p>Car journeys combine many of the factors that make time pass so agonisingly slowly for children.Ruth Ogden, Reader in Experimental Psychology, Liverpool John Moores UniversityLicensed as Creative Commons – attribution, no derivatives.tag:theconversation.com,2011:article/1394332020-07-08T11:56:24Z2020-07-08T11:56:24ZWhy going camping could be the answer to your lockdown holiday woes<figure><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/345501/original/file-20200703-29-1b6b93y.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&rect=36%2C95%2C4883%2C3091&q=45&auto=format&w=496&fit=clip" /><figcaption><span class="caption">
</span> <span class="attribution"><span class="source">Pexels</span></span></figcaption></figure><p>For many of us, the forced confinement of lockdown has reiterated the importance of <a href="https://theconversation.com/four-ways-people-stuck-at-home-became-armchair-naturalists-during-lockdown-139522">being out and about in nature</a> – along with the benefits it can bring.</p>
<p>So as the <a href="https://theconversation.com/coronavirus-is-taking-english-pubs-back-in-time-141544">UK begins to reopen</a>, it’s likely that many people will be craving space away from crowds and busy, built-up areas. And given that, <a href="https://www.ons.gov.uk/economy/environmentalaccounts/articles/oneineightbritishhouseholdshasnogarden/2020-05-14">one in eight</a> British households has no garden, there is likely to be a surge in people heading off to enjoy the great outdoors and British countryside.</p>
<p>Indeed, outdoor areas and activities – think gardens, national parks and coastal areas – are likely to be busier than usual. Predominantly indoor activities and venues, meanwhile – such as restaurants, museums and galleries – are likely to face lengthier periods of subdued demand.</p>
<p>As a result, the tourism industry is anticipating a surge in people taking active outdoor breaks close to home. In the US for example, a national marketing campaign from the <a href="https://www.nationalparks.org/explore-parks/travel-ideas">National Park Foundation</a> will promote lesser-known parks as destinations. While <a href="https://news.airbnb.com/en-au/airbnb-launches-go-near-a-new-campaign-to-support-domestic-travel/#:%7E:text=Airbnb%20launches%20Go%20Near%2C%20a%20new%20campaign%20to%20support%20domestic%20travel,-By%20Airbnb%20%C2%B7%2011&text=Airbnb%20today%20launched%20Go%20Near,of%20the%20COVID%2D19%20pandemic.">Airbnb’s recent Go Near initiative</a> aims to support the “growing desire for domestic travel”.</p>
<p>In the UK, VisitBritain’s weekly UK COVID-19 <a href="https://www.visitbritain.org/covid-19-consumer-sentiment-tracker">Consumer Tracker Report</a> shows that 20% of adults in the UK plan to take a short break or holiday within the UK by September. Coastal areas (both urban and rural) are emerging as top destinations. </p>
<h2>Heading outdoors</h2>
<p><a href="https://www.eurekacamping.com/blog/article/10-health-benefits-camping">Spending time outdoors</a>, <a href="https://www.uea.ac.uk/about/-/it-s-official-spending-time-outside-is-good-for-you">can improve your</a> blood pressure and digestion and boost the immune system. Spending time in green space, near trees, also means that <a href="https://theconversation.com/why-a-walk-in-the-woods-really-does-help-your-body-and-your-soul-53227">we take in more oxygen</a>, which in turn leads to release of the feelgood hormone serotonin. </p>
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<img alt="" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/345511/original/file-20200703-33909-10amfbg.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/345511/original/file-20200703-33909-10amfbg.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=385&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/345511/original/file-20200703-33909-10amfbg.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=385&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/345511/original/file-20200703-33909-10amfbg.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=385&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/345511/original/file-20200703-33909-10amfbg.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=484&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/345511/original/file-20200703-33909-10amfbg.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=484&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/345511/original/file-20200703-33909-10amfbg.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=484&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px">
<figcaption>
<span class="caption">Spending time outdoors can give you that natural boost.</span>
<span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://www.shutterstock.com/image-photo/happy-family-flying-kite-having-fun-1012262506">DisobeyArt/Shutterstock</a></span>
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<p><a href="https://www.telegraph.co.uk/travel/family-holidays/the-science-behind-how-holidays-make-your-child-happier-and-smarter/">Many families</a> incorporate outdoor activity in green space into their holiday plans as a way of improving wellbeing and mental health. Active pursuits in the outdoors can also bring families together to enjoy themselves.</p>
<p>Camping, more than most forms of holiday, involves family members doing more together and encourages a more active, back-to-nature lifestyle. And, according to <a href="https://www.plymouth.ac.uk/news/study-links-camping-and-happier-children#:%7E:text=Research%20led%20by%20Sue%20Waite,on%20their%20children's%20school%20education.&text=Children%20also%20recognised%20camping's%20value,problem%20solving%20and%20working%20together.">research</a> from the University of Plymouth, children who go camping do better at school and are healthier and happier. So it’s a win-win.</p>
<p>The children who took part in the research were asked what they love about camping and the most common themes were making and meeting new friends, having fun, playing outside and learning various camping skills. Children also recognised camping’s value for problem solving and working together – out in the fresh air, away from the TV and computers.</p>
<h2>Quality family time</h2>
<p>The make-up of family units has changed massively over the past two decades. And many families now <a href="https://www.researchgate.net/publication/276307204_The_Future_of_Family_Tourism">live spread out</a> – no longer in one place, town or city. So for many families, holidays offer the offer the chance to spend time and reconnect with different generations of their family – along with quality time together that is <a href="https://books.google.co.uk/books?hl=en&lr=&id=78JKDwAAQBAJ&oi=fnd&pg=PA28&dq=family+tourism&ots=re5um9pF5j&sig=EtsRq7-I_xWEhYcXEm1PkPPr-l0#v=onepage&q=family%20tourism&f=false">so fundamental to family life</a>.</p>
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<img alt="" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/345512/original/file-20200703-33918-1jqo999.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/345512/original/file-20200703-33918-1jqo999.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=407&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/345512/original/file-20200703-33918-1jqo999.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=407&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/345512/original/file-20200703-33918-1jqo999.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=407&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/345512/original/file-20200703-33918-1jqo999.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=512&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/345512/original/file-20200703-33918-1jqo999.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=512&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/345512/original/file-20200703-33918-1jqo999.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=512&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px">
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<span class="caption">Time outdoors can give families the chance to reconnect.</span>
<span class="attribution"><span class="source">Shutterstock/Maksym Gorpenyuk</span></span>
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<p>For families with busy lives, where parents are often working long hours, the chance to be together on holiday can feel key to the survival of the family unit. And many working parents – <a href="https://theconversation.com/return-of-the-1950s-housewife-how-to-stop-coronavirus-lockdown-reinforcing-sexist-gender-roles-134851">mums in particular</a> – have found that the struggle to balance work and childcare has been exacerbated during lockdown. </p>
<p>But of course, families struggling to spend time together is not a new phenomenon. In 2011 a <a href="https://pressreleases.responsesource.com/news/68058/all-work-and-no-play-a-new-reality-for-british/">Thomson Holiday report</a> found that, more than one-quarter of working parents spent less than an hour a day with their children. This is despite wanting more time together.</p>
<h2>Time for a break</h2>
<p><a href="https://books.google.co.uk/books?hl=en&lr=&id=78JKDwAAQBAJ&oi=fnd&pg=PA28&dq=family+tourism&ots=re5um9pF5j&sig=EtsRq7-I_xWEhYcXEm1PkPPr-l0#v=onepage&q=family%20tourism&f=false">The benefits of family holidays</a> are numerous. They can give all members of the family time to regain balance, reconnect and restore equilibrium. Holidays are also often an opportunity for people to try new skills, sports or activities – which can help to <a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6354626/">boost confidence and self-esteem</a>.</p>
<p>So don’t despair if you’re no longer heading abroad this summer. Instead, head for the great outdoors and enjoy some quality family time – away from the house and daily lockdown routine. </p>
<p>This will not only give you a chance to relax and unwind in a new environment but will also encourage children and other family members to try something new – whether it’s toasting marshmallows and singing campfire songs, swimming in rivers, stargazing – or simply just being close to nature.</p><img src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/139433/count.gif" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" />
<p class="fine-print"><em><span>Carol Southall does not work for, consult, own shares in or receive funding from any company or organisation that would benefit from this article, and has disclosed no relevant affiliations beyond their academic appointment.</span></em></p>Research shows children who go camping do better at school and are healthier and happier.Carol Southall, Course Leader and Senior Lecturer at Staffordshire Business School, Staffordshire UniversityLicensed as Creative Commons – attribution, no derivatives.tag:theconversation.com,2011:article/1082192018-12-26T10:30:56Z2018-12-26T10:30:56ZWinter skiing holidays: how to get ski fit and avoid an injury<figure><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/250017/original/file-20181211-76959-1e3w0w8.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=496&fit=clip" /><figcaption><span class="caption">
</span> <span class="attribution"><span class="source">Pexels</span></span></figcaption></figure><p>From Vail in the US to Val d’Isere in France, winter sports holidays are all the rage. And with <a href="https://denver.cbslocal.com/2013/11/19/ski-slopes-demographics-change-as-more-senior-skiers-suit-up/">more older people</a> now hitting the slopes, there has been an inevitable rise in <a href="http://www.thetravelmagazine.net/post-office-survey-says-half-of-holidaymakers-injured-while-skiing-were-not-covered-by-travel-insurance.html">snow sport-related injuries</a>. </p>
<p>The knee joint is especially vulnerable – accounting for <a href="https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/pdf/10.1177/0363546512472045">30% of all skiing injuries</a>. The most common knee injury is to the anterior cruciate ligament – known as the “ACL”. Skiing injury is the <a href="https://bradscholars.brad.ac.uk/bitstream/handle/10454/14627/FULL%2520FINAL%2520SUBMISSION%2520ELECTRONIC%2520VERSION.pdf?sequence=1&isAllowed=y">third most common cause</a> of an ACL injury in Britain, after football and rugby. Most skiers suffering an ACL injury will require surgery followed by many months of rehabilitation. So the impact of an ACL injury should not be underestimated. </p>
<p><a href="https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007%2Fs40279-015-0334-7">The majority of injuries in the novice skier</a> occur as a result of a fall. In the more experienced skier, it’s most likely to happen when landing from a jump. But the good news is there are steps you can take to condition your body in readiness for your winter sports holiday – which will help to reduce your risk of knee injury. </p>
<p>Here’s our guide to getting ski ready. And although strength and conditioning feature heavily, it’s also important to think about cardiovascular fitness before you hit the slopes – as <a href="https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/pdf/10.1080/17457300500480955?needAccess=true&redirect=1">many injuries occur as a result of fatigue</a>.</p>
<h2>Things to do before you go</h2>
<p>You should aim to start these exercises before the trip – ideally at least six weeks prior to skiing. All of the below exercises should be attempted for a minute initially with the aim to increase as you improve. </p>
<p><strong><em>Balance</em></strong></p>
<figure class="align-right zoomable">
<a href="https://images.theconversation.com/files/251266/original/file-20181218-27770-172p3o.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=1000&fit=clip"><img alt="" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/251266/original/file-20181218-27770-172p3o.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=237&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/251266/original/file-20181218-27770-172p3o.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=499&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/251266/original/file-20181218-27770-172p3o.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=499&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/251266/original/file-20181218-27770-172p3o.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=499&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/251266/original/file-20181218-27770-172p3o.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=627&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/251266/original/file-20181218-27770-172p3o.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=627&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/251266/original/file-20181218-27770-172p3o.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=627&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px"></a>
<figcaption>
<span class="caption">This will help work on your balance.</span>
<span class="attribution"><span class="license">Author provided</span></span>
</figcaption>
</figure>
<p>With any snow sport good balance is essential with particular focus on dynamic balance so the ability to stay upright while on the move. Standing on one leg, reach for the points of an imaginary clock face. Swap legs and do it again. </p>
<p><strong><em>Lateral jumps</em></strong></p>
<figure class="align-right zoomable">
<a href="https://images.theconversation.com/files/251268/original/file-20181218-27773-1e20nqr.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=1000&fit=clip"><img alt="" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/251268/original/file-20181218-27773-1e20nqr.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=237&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/251268/original/file-20181218-27773-1e20nqr.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=598&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/251268/original/file-20181218-27773-1e20nqr.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=598&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/251268/original/file-20181218-27773-1e20nqr.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=598&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/251268/original/file-20181218-27773-1e20nqr.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=751&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/251268/original/file-20181218-27773-1e20nqr.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=751&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/251268/original/file-20181218-27773-1e20nqr.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=751&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px"></a>
<figcaption>
<span class="caption">Bend your knees as you land to support your joints and aim to land on the balls of your feet.</span>
<span class="attribution"><span class="license">Author provided</span></span>
</figcaption>
</figure>
<p>This exercise conditions the body to absorb shock, particularly useful in landing with an emphasis on a lateral direction weight shift. You should bend your knees to lower yourself into a squatting position. Keep your weight evenly distributed through both of your feet. Maintain a straight spine and a flat back. Avoid arching or curving your back and losing form while you jump to the side and then back again.</p>
<p><strong><em>Parallel rotation jumps</em></strong></p>
<figure class="align-right zoomable">
<a href="https://images.theconversation.com/files/251270/original/file-20181218-27755-1nnp0ns.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=1000&fit=clip"><img alt="" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/251270/original/file-20181218-27755-1nnp0ns.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=237&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/251270/original/file-20181218-27755-1nnp0ns.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=602&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/251270/original/file-20181218-27755-1nnp0ns.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=602&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/251270/original/file-20181218-27755-1nnp0ns.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=602&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/251270/original/file-20181218-27755-1nnp0ns.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=757&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/251270/original/file-20181218-27755-1nnp0ns.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=757&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/251270/original/file-20181218-27755-1nnp0ns.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=757&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px"></a>
<figcaption>
<span class="caption">Aim to keep your torso straight and use your arms.</span>
<span class="attribution"><span class="license">Author provided</span></span>
</figcaption>
</figure>
<p>This promotes greater trunk strength and control while keeping the lower limb in a position conducive to parallel turns. Start from a squatting position and jump turn from side to side landing on the balls of your feet. Let your knees bend to absorb the shock and ensure that you keep your chest facing forwards throughout. </p>
<p><strong><em>Lunges with rotation</em></strong></p>
<figure class="align-right zoomable">
<a href="https://images.theconversation.com/files/251523/original/file-20181219-45413-r62560.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=1000&fit=clip"><img alt="" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/251523/original/file-20181219-45413-r62560.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=237&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/251523/original/file-20181219-45413-r62560.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=577&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/251523/original/file-20181219-45413-r62560.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=577&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/251523/original/file-20181219-45413-r62560.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=577&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/251523/original/file-20181219-45413-r62560.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=725&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/251523/original/file-20181219-45413-r62560.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=725&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/251523/original/file-20181219-45413-r62560.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=725&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px"></a>
<figcaption>
<span class="caption">Keep your front foot flat and bend into your knee.</span>
<span class="attribution"><span class="license">Author provided</span></span>
</figcaption>
</figure>
<p>This exercise for quadriceps with trunk rotation allows the body to fix in one area while being able to move in another. Starting from standing step straight forwards on one leg letting your knees bend. Once complete twist your upper body to the side and back again before returning to the start position. Repeat on the other leg. </p>
<p><strong><em>Calf stretches</em></strong></p>
<figure class="align-right zoomable">
<a href="https://images.theconversation.com/files/251518/original/file-20181219-45400-1txfccx.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=1000&fit=clip"><img alt="" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/251518/original/file-20181219-45400-1txfccx.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=237&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/251518/original/file-20181219-45400-1txfccx.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=602&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/251518/original/file-20181219-45400-1txfccx.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=602&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/251518/original/file-20181219-45400-1txfccx.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=602&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/251518/original/file-20181219-45400-1txfccx.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=757&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/251518/original/file-20181219-45400-1txfccx.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=757&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/251518/original/file-20181219-45400-1txfccx.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=757&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px"></a>
<figcaption>
<span class="caption">Use a wall for support and alternate these two stretches.</span>
<span class="attribution"><span class="license">Author provided</span></span>
</figcaption>
</figure>
<p>Flexibility in the calves is important when skiing as it to enables you to lean forward into your boots to keep a downward force on the front of your skis. Lack of flexibility means the ankle’s range of movement is more limited and may lead to excessive weight bearing through the heel – which can lead to a leaning back posture. <a href="https://www.researchgate.net/publication/51783269_Events_leading_to_anterior_cruciate_ligament_injury_in_World_Cup_Alpine_Skiing_A_systematic_video_analysis_of_20_cases">Leaning backwards is one the main contributors</a> to falls leading to knee ligament injuries. </p>
<p><strong><em>Cardiovascular</em></strong></p>
<p>You should also aim to boost your cardiovascular fitness before you hit the slopes, to help your body deal with all the extra activity. You could use a cross trainer, attend a spinning class or even just start running. Interval training would also prepare you for the slopes as skiing involves bursts of activity over a longer duration of time. </p>
<h2>Things to do on the trip</h2>
<p>Warm up properly every day and wear appropriate clothing to keep you warm. Studies have shown that <a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/21477163">you are more likely to get injured on colder days</a>. It’s also sensible to try and limit your alcohol intake, as <a href="https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/pdf/10.1080/17457300500480955?needAccess=true&redirect=1">studies have shown</a> alcohol increases risk taking behaviour and reduces coordination increasing the likelihood of injury in skiers. And if you do drink, remember you may still be vulnerable the morning after. </p>
<figure class="align-center ">
<img alt="" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/250022/original/file-20181211-76971-m6nz6p.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/250022/original/file-20181211-76971-m6nz6p.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/250022/original/file-20181211-76971-m6nz6p.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/250022/original/file-20181211-76971-m6nz6p.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/250022/original/file-20181211-76971-m6nz6p.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/250022/original/file-20181211-76971-m6nz6p.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/250022/original/file-20181211-76971-m6nz6p.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px">
<figcaption>
<span class="caption">Skiing can be exhilarating, but can also easily cause injury.</span>
<span class="attribution"><span class="source">Pexels</span></span>
</figcaption>
</figure>
<p>It’s also important to take regular breaks during the day. Take a rest day and make sure you get some sleep. Fatigue is not perceived to be a significant risk factor amongst skiers yet has been <a href="https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/pdf/10.1080/17457300500480955?needAccess=true&redirect=1">linked to increased injury risk</a>. </p>
<p>Helmets are also a must. <a href="https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/pdf/10.1177/0363546512472045">Head injury is significant risk</a> with any snow sport and is the third most common injury occurring in both skiers and snowboarders – and the consequences can be life changing. </p>
<p>It’s also important to make sure all your gear is fitting properly. Make sure your bindings (which connect your boot to your skis) are set right and regularly checked – and are appropriate for you proficiency level. People with <a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5733917/">incorrectly bound skis</a> are more likely to incur a knee injury, so this is a point worth remembering.</p>
<p>Yes, you might be on holidays and yes, skiing is fun, but accidents can and do happen quickly – so it’s worth spending a bit of time before you go getting your body ready for all the different movements it will need to make. This will help you to enjoy your time on the slopes, feel less tired and hopefully come home without any injuries.</p><img src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/108219/count.gif" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" />
<p class="fine-print"><em><span>The authors do not work for, consult, own shares in or receive funding from any company or organisation that would benefit from this article, and have disclosed no relevant affiliations beyond their academic appointment.</span></em></p>A few visits to the gym or a short jog around the block in the week before departure isn’t enough preparation.Paul Millington, Lecturer in Physiotherapy, University of BradfordColin Ayre, Lecturer in Physiotherapy, University of BradfordJamie Moseley, Lecturer in Sport Rehabilitation, University of BradfordLicensed as Creative Commons – attribution, no derivatives.tag:theconversation.com,2011:article/1001322018-07-20T13:12:16Z2018-07-20T13:12:16ZEight ways to keep your kids smart over the summer break<figure><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/228238/original/file-20180718-142414-19q6nsw.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=496&fit=clip" /><figcaption><span class="caption">
</span> <span class="attribution"><span class="source">shutterstock</span></span></figcaption></figure><p>The school holidays are looming, and so too is the apparently inevitable summer “<a href="https://theconversation.com/should-we-shorten-the-long-summer-break-from-school-maybe-not-92423">learning slide</a>” – where children lose knowledge and academic skills over the long summer break.</p>
<p>This is where parents can help out by helping their offspring carry on that learning during the summer holidays. Of course, learning at home is different from learning at school, but <a href="https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/toc/20448279/88/2">our new findings</a> highlight how parents can act as “scaffolders” for children when learning from home. </p>
<p>The idea is that parents should offer just as much support as children need to complete a task – but not too much. And then crucially, remove that support as the child builds their own knowledge. </p>
<p>So with this in mind, here are eight painless ways for parents to support their children’s educational development over the summer – using the “scaffolding” technique.</p>
<h2>1. Make them mini accountants</h2>
<p>Learning doesn’t have to be just about facts or memorising times tables. Learning to self regulate is very important for children – from toddler-hood onwards. This can include things such as focusing attention on reading – but also regulating emotion, in terms of coping with changes of plan or dealing with sibling conflict during play. </p>
<p>Children can be helped to take responsibility by managing “budgets”, whether of money, time or activity choices. If your children have a permitted account of daily screen time, or a pocket money budget, help them to manage that themselves. Tangible markers of time or money (such as sand timers or coins) help even younger children see what they have to spend, and what’s left.</p>
<h2>2. Be a parent cheerleader</h2>
<p>A child can achieve something bigger and more satisfying with a parent’s help. And by praising their contribution, parents can help to develop the child’s sense of mastery. This doesn’t have to be only about school learning, riding a bike or grasping a new game brings those feelings too. “Autonomy support” looks to be an effective approach – this is the idea that instead of nagging or arguing, show concern and praise effort to help your child achieve self control. Think optimistic, empathetic and encouraging.</p>
<figure class="align-center ">
<img alt="" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/228236/original/file-20180718-142420-1d4vug7.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/228236/original/file-20180718-142420-1d4vug7.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/228236/original/file-20180718-142420-1d4vug7.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/228236/original/file-20180718-142420-1d4vug7.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/228236/original/file-20180718-142420-1d4vug7.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/228236/original/file-20180718-142420-1d4vug7.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/228236/original/file-20180718-142420-1d4vug7.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px">
<figcaption>
<span class="caption">Learning a new skill over the summer holidays can be a big boost to a child.</span>
<span class="attribution"><span class="source">Shutterstock</span></span>
</figcaption>
</figure>
<h2>3. But know when to stand back</h2>
<p>Sensitive parenting is also about helping your child to gauge when they can achieve something independently. Children need to develop a sense of their own capabilities and know when to ask for help – and problem solving can be really motivating if it’s part of a creative endeavour. Set them a task, such as how deep has the hole got to be to bury dad in the sand or get them to keep score in a family game of beach volleyball. </p>
<h2>4. Channel Goldilocks</h2>
<p>Give just as much help as is needed, and not too much. A child who works out how to divide up a blackberry haul with a few well-placed hints – or manages to put their own shoes on – learns something important about mastery as well as about numbers or laces. Holidays can be good for this because there’s often less of the everyday pressure to get somewhere on time, avoiding the temptation to be quick and take over from your child. </p>
<h2>5. Share stories</h2>
<p>Reading still underlies so much of our learning and summer can provide opportunities to read every day – whether it’s a slightly less time-pressured bedtime story, magazine or comics on a long journey or keeping and sharing diaries. </p>
<p>Your child doesn’t have to do all the reading either – shared stories really <a href="https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/10888438.2018.1482901">helps academic progress</a> and gives your child access to more challenging material. It can also be a lovely cosy wind down at the end of the day. You can also provide <a href="https://www.forbes.com/sites/jordanshapiro/2014/05/13/kids-dont-read-books-because-parents-dont-read-books/#2aaf774025d5">a good role model</a> if your child sees you enjoying your own holiday reading.</p>
<figure class="align-center ">
<img alt="" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/228239/original/file-20180718-142426-5ndp4m.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/228239/original/file-20180718-142426-5ndp4m.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/228239/original/file-20180718-142426-5ndp4m.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/228239/original/file-20180718-142426-5ndp4m.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/228239/original/file-20180718-142426-5ndp4m.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/228239/original/file-20180718-142426-5ndp4m.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/228239/original/file-20180718-142426-5ndp4m.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px">
<figcaption>
<span class="caption">Enjoy some quiet time together.</span>
<span class="attribution"><span class="source">Shutterstock</span></span>
</figcaption>
</figure>
<h2>6. Technology rules</h2>
<p>The right technology can provide all sorts of learning opportunities for children – from creating holiday diary vlogs to share with relatives, to YouTube videos for DIY art and crafts ideas. Just make sure you keep screens for the daytime – there is <a href="http://www.pnas.org/content/pnas/112/4/1232.full.pdf?__hstc=93655746.972fdd7a7debc8575bac5a80cf7e1683.1477353600071.1477353600072.1477353600073.1&__hssc=93655746.1.1477353600074&__hsfp=1773666937">solid evidence</a> that shows the sleep disrupting effects of blue light. Switching off a couple of hours before bedtime is a good rule of thumb. </p>
<h2>7. It’s not a race</h2>
<p>Every family and child is different. A child’s developmental timetable really varies – especially in young children. Your child might not be at the same level of self regulation as their cousin, but every child needs to develop in their own time – with your help and support. It’s all about starting from where the child is, rather than where someone tells you the child should be. </p>
<figure class="align-center ">
<img alt="" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/228241/original/file-20180718-142405-1vpb4y6.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/228241/original/file-20180718-142405-1vpb4y6.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=401&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/228241/original/file-20180718-142405-1vpb4y6.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=401&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/228241/original/file-20180718-142405-1vpb4y6.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=401&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/228241/original/file-20180718-142405-1vpb4y6.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/228241/original/file-20180718-142405-1vpb4y6.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/228241/original/file-20180718-142405-1vpb4y6.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px">
<figcaption>
<span class="caption">Let them explore their creative side.</span>
<span class="attribution"><span class="source">Shutterstock</span></span>
</figcaption>
</figure>
<h2>8. Tune in to your child</h2>
<p>Listening and being interested in what your child is doing really helps you support their discovery of the world. And this can be much easier at holiday time if you are somewhere new. But even walking round the local park with a magnifying glass and a bug spotting app or chart, works. The Wildlife Trust has some great ideas – both <a href="https://www.woodlandtrust.org.uk/naturedetectives/">low cost and free</a>. </p>
<p>Most importantly, have fun together – summer holidays are a wonderful opportunity to share learning experiences that will stay with a child for years to come and will help you bond as a family.</p><img src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/100132/count.gif" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" />
<p class="fine-print"><em><span>Nicola Yuill and Amanda Carr received funding from the British Psychological Society for work related to the scaffolding special issue.</span></em></p>Forget the “summer slide” here’s how you can help your child learn more over the summer holidays.Nicola Yuill, Senior Lecturer in Psychology, University of SussexLicensed as Creative Commons – attribution, no derivatives.tag:theconversation.com,2011:article/888422017-12-19T01:05:30Z2017-12-19T01:05:30ZTips from negotiation experts for truly happy holidays<figure><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/199514/original/file-20171215-17845-4xhdcn.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=496&fit=clip" /><figcaption><span class="caption">Holidays don't always bring you closer.
</span> <span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://www.shutterstock.com/image-photo/young-couple-having-angry-argument-disagreement-504870598?src=RZU0u8OnzgE7Cw7ecxJcDQ-1-0"> bokan/Shutterstock.com</a></span></figcaption></figure><p><em>An updated version of this article was published on Nov. 17, 2021. <a href="https://theconversation.com/how-my-family-makes-holiday-decisions-that-work-for-everyone-according-to-a-negotiation-expert-171558">Read it here</a>.</em></p>
<p>I’m having an amazing holiday season.</p>
<p>Each year it seems our travel gets more and more out of control. Between the multiple holidays, family we need to visit distributed all around the country and the rounds of parties for work and with friends, it’s difficult to find time for anything beyond social obligations. This year my husband and I took a different approach, consciously deciding and negotiating what we would do and what we would not do. In the end, we stayed home for Thanksgiving and had a lovely dinner with just the four of us (him, me, and our two boys, ages 9 and 11). We are planning one trip to visit his family over Christmas, but will combine it with some dedicated family time. We decided to forego hosting a party of our own and have strictly limited the other parties we will attend.</p>
<p>How did this happen? I applied the lessons from my academic study of bargaining and negotiation to my personal life. So, with another holiday season upon us, here’s some guidance on how to negotiate with your partner while strengthening this critical relationship.</p>
<h2>From theory to practice</h2>
<p>I became interested in negotiation as a graduate student, and part of my dissertation investigated bargaining behavior. </p>
<p>I have taught negotiation to students and executives, published <a href="http://citeseerx.ist.psu.edu/viewdoc/download?doi=10.1.1.399.3789&rep=rep1&type=pdf">many scholarly articles</a> on bargaining and negotiation and given numerous <a href="https://www.mchra.org/event-2164407">public lectures</a> on the topic. But, like many academics, I hadn’t thought to apply my academic expertise to my personal life.</p>
<p>Once I started to do so, however, I quickly realized that the concepts and skills learned from negotiation can be used not only to get what you need or want out of your family life but also to make your family life happier overall. </p>
<p>The most important insight is that negotiation does not have to be win-lose. It can be win-win. </p>
<h2>Win-lose versus win-win</h2>
<p>The popular conception of negotiation is all about getting the best deal for yourself or your side. It was a set of Harvard professors in their <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Getting_to_Yes">groundbreaking</a> 1981 book, <a href="https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/324551/getting-to-yes-by-roger-fisher/9780143118756/">“Getting to Yes,”</a> who first popularly introduced the idea that negotiation could be “integrative,” or result in both parties being better off.</p>
<p>In practice, <a href="http://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/074959789090048E">many negotiators see only “distributive” or win-lose possibilities.</a> In their minds, there is a fixed pie over which the parties are fighting: If you win, then I lose. As a result, most of the early <a href="http://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/0022103168900681">academic literature</a> and practical guidance have focused on power. As you might imagine, this can be quite problematic for negotiating within the family.</p>
<p>In contrast, the idea of integrative or win-win negotiations involves identifying outcomes that are good for both sides. </p>
<p>There are a number of ways one can achieve integrative negotiations, but here I will discuss three of the major ones described in <a href="https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/324551/getting-to-yes-by-roger-fisher/9780143118756/">“Getting to Yes”</a> and <a href="http://amp.aom.org/content/18/3/109">subsequent articles</a>. </p>
<p><strong>Trade-offs.</strong> For example, consider a couple sharing a chicken for dinner. One way to share would be to cut the chicken in half and to each get an equal portion. This would be a distributive solution, since we are distributing the chicken between the couple, and if one were to get more (win), the other would get less (lose). An integrative agreement can be found by identifying trade-offs between the two parties. For example, it turns out that I like the dark meat and my husband likes the white meat. So I can give him my breast and wing and he can give me his leg and thigh, and we can both win.</p>
<p><strong>Adding issues.</strong> A second way to achieve win-win solutions is to change the scope of the negotiation. For example, each year my husband and I negotiate about where to take our summer vacation. I want to go to the forests of Lake Tahoe and he wants to go to the casinos of Atlantic City. As long as the scope of the negotiation remains focused on this one trip, it will be difficult to satisfy us both. However, imagine we expanded the negotiation to include multiple dimensions. For example, we could make a multi-year deal where we alternated our destinations. Or I could commit to spending our winter vacation in Atlantic City in exchange for a summer vacation in Lake Tahoe. Or he could agree to let me pick the vacation destination if I allow him to host a monthly poker game at our house.</p>
<figure class="align-center ">
<img alt="" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/199515/original/file-20171215-17863-1r5do9b.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/199515/original/file-20171215-17863-1r5do9b.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=300&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/199515/original/file-20171215-17863-1r5do9b.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=300&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/199515/original/file-20171215-17863-1r5do9b.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=300&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/199515/original/file-20171215-17863-1r5do9b.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=377&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/199515/original/file-20171215-17863-1r5do9b.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=377&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/199515/original/file-20171215-17863-1r5do9b.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=377&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px">
<figcaption>
<span class="caption">Atlantic City or Lake Tahoe?</span>
<span class="attribution"><span class="source">Public Domain</span></span>
</figcaption>
</figure>
<p><strong>Beyond positions to interests.</strong> A third way to achieve win-win solutions is to move beyond each individual’s position and focus on his or her interests. For example, when my husband and I were getting married, we had our strongest disagreement about the wedding cake. I wanted chocolate and he wanted white (vanilla). After many rounds of arguing, I finally asked why he wanted white cake. He replied that white was traditional and he wanted the cake to be white in the pictures. I told him that my whole family liked chocolate, and we wanted to eat chocolate cake. Once you move beyond positions (white cake versus chocolate cake) to underlying interests (picture cake versus eating cake), many integrative solutions become possible: white chocolate, bride’s cake/groom’s cake, Photoshop and so on. </p>
<p>In the end, we had a three-tier cake, with two large chocolate tiers and one small white tier which we fed each other for the photos. </p>
<h2>Negotiation tactics for the family</h2>
<p>So, how should you negotiate with your partner, parents or children to get what everyone wants during the holidays? </p>
<p>Here are some suggested tactics to help you achieve these win-win outcomes.</p>
<p><strong>Be honest, not mean.</strong> To achieve win-win negotiations, all parties involved must be honest about what they want. </p>
<p><a href="http://www.people.hbs.edu/kmcginn/PDFs/Publishedarticles/1995-friendslovers.pdf">One study</a> found that married couples come to fewer win-win solutions than friends in part because they are unwilling to ask for what they want, thinking that the other person will be angry with them. </p>
<p>Simply giving in to the other person’s demands is not the pathway to win-win solutions. Instead, each party needs to express what is important to him or her and why, and listen carefully to his or her partner’s priorities and reasoning. </p>
<p>Explaining that I wanted to eat chocolate cake and understanding that my husband wanted white cake for the pictures was pivotal to our coming to a win-win agreement.</p>
<p><strong>Make concessions.</strong> One of the hallmarks of negotiations is that no one gets everything he or she wants. You need to be willing to make concessions, to give up the aspects that are less important to you in order to get what is most important to you. </p>
<p>While cleaning up after poker games at our house is not my idea of a great time, it’s worth it to get the summer vacation I want.</p>
<p><strong>Be creative.</strong> Once you understand and accept each other’s needs, you need to be creative about finding ways to meet them. This can involve brainstorming and being tolerant of your partner’s crazy, off-the-wall ideas in the process. </p>
<p>Should we go to Monaco? What about an online poker account? How about a long weekend in Reno during our Tahoe trip? </p>
<p><strong>Make promises, not threats.</strong> Finally, a word about language. One of the realities of negotiation is that either party can walk away. One way to keep the conversation constructive is to make promises (if we both order the chicken, I’ll trade your white meat for my dark meat) and avoid threats (if you won’t trade, I’ll have to order the surf-and-turf).</p>
<h2>The past and the future</h2>
<p>Each family has a long history together, with real and perceived slights. Families also expect to have long futures together. </p>
<p>As a result, it is extremely important that these negotiations be handled with respect for the other party, and with a view to the long-term costs and benefits. Pick your battles, and concede on the other issues. You don’t need to win them all, just the important ones. </p>
<p>For this holiday season, we negotiated for a slower-paced experience with more quality time with our nuclear family. As the winter holidays approach, remember to consider your interests, listen to the goals of your partner and search for win-win solutions. May your holidays be joyous and your negotiations be integrative.</p>
<p><em>Editor’s note: This is an updated version of an article originally published Dec. 18, 2017.</em></p><img src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/88842/count.gif" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" />
<p class="fine-print"><em><span>Rachel Croson has previously received funding from the National Science Foundation.</span></em></p>A scholar applies lessons from her research to negotiate with her spouse better and have an ‘awesome holiday.’ Here’s how you can too – and make your family life happier overall.Rachel Croson, Executive Vice President and Provost, University of MinnesotaLicensed as Creative Commons – attribution, no derivatives.tag:theconversation.com,2011:article/887632017-12-18T01:25:13Z2017-12-18T01:25:13ZSkip fights about digital devices over the holidays – instead, let them bring your family together<figure><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/199055/original/file-20171213-27558-sg2ks.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=496&fit=clip" /><figcaption><span class="caption">Rather than conflict, seek togetherness.</span> <span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://www.shutterstock.com/image-photo/family-relationship-grandmother-granddaughter-happy-old-667068538">Diego Cervo/Shutterstock.com</a></span></figcaption></figure><p>Holidays are a time for family and friends to come together, to celebrate and to enjoy each other’s company. Older adults, who are often <a href="https://www.aarp.org/content/dam/aarp/aarp_foundation/2012_PDFs/AARP-Foundation-Isolation-Framework-Report.pdf">lonely and socially isolated</a>, can particularly <a href="http://assets.pewresearch.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/11/2013/12/Christmas-survey-2013-full-report.pdf">look forward</a> to reconnecting with family and friends. However, when technology enters the picture, gatherings may not be quite so positive.</p>
<p>All across the U.S., people of all ages are <a href="http://www.pewinternet.org/2017/02/09/digital-divides-feeding-america/">increasingly using technology</a> – including <a href="http://www.pewinternet.org/2017/05/17/tech-adoption-climbs-among-older-adults/">adults 65 and older</a>. My research, and that of others, has found that using computers, smartphones and the internet can help seniors <a href="https://doi.org/10.1093/geronb/gbu018">fight depression</a> and <a href="http://doi.org/10.2196/jmir.2306">loneliness</a>, and <a href="https://doi.org/10.1093/geronb/gbw130">enhance their sense</a> of <a href="https://doi.org/10.1080/03601277.2016.1205425">well-being and self-worth</a>. Technology use can also help older adults <a href="https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-319-40542-1_49">feel like they matter to others</a> and help them stay connected with loved ones.</p>
<p>However, my research, with colleagues, has also found that older adults still <a href="https://doi.org/10.1080/03601277.2015.1083392">prefer in-person social interactions</a>. This can cause problems during holiday-season family gatherings, when younger relatives are likely to want to spend lots of time on their smartphones and other devices, often ignoring others in the same physical location. It’s a conflict one of my Ph.D. students, <a href="https://scholar.google.com/citations?user=edkc4HUAAAAJ&hl=en">Christopher Ball</a>, has called the “<a href="https://doi.org/10.1177/0733464817732518">physical-digital divide</a>.” Fortunately, our work both offers explanations for these difficulties and suggests ways to turn holiday disagreement and disappointment into increased family connection that can last all year long.</p>
<h2>Conflicting feelings</h2>
<p>When they’re away on family visits that can last several days, it’s common for young people – tweens, teens and those in their 20s – to want to stay connected to their friends. However, older adults nearby may feel frustrated, disrespected, isolated and even offended.</p>
<p>In our study, older adults told us they often attempt to limit this and other negative effects of digital devices by <a href="https://doi.org/10.1177/0733464817732518">declaring tech-free “bubbles” at particular times or places</a>. They ask their friends and relatives to put devices aside during mealtimes and other key activities, to better focus on engaging with others face to face.</p>
<p>But that’s not the only way to create a balance between using technology and interacting directly.</p>
<h2>Finding opportunities</h2>
<p>Certainly there can be times when devices should be put down and in-person interaction comes first. Yet all generations can benefit when older family members see how <a href="https://www.crcpress.com/Designing-Technology-Training-for-Older-Adults-in-Continuing-Care-Retirement/Cotten-Yost-Berkowsky-Winstead-Anderson/p/book/9781498718127">they can use technology</a> to <a href="https://doi.org/10.1177/0733464811431824">improve their own lives</a>.</p>
<p>Our work suggests that situations with potential for intergenerational conflict can be shifted to bring relatives together: Younger generations can show their older family members about technological devices.</p>
<p>Grandchildren, for example, can demonstrate to their grandparents how they use mobile phones, tablets and social media, explaining what they like about the technologies. It might even turn into a teaching opportunity, helping older family members learn to entertain themselves online. They might even want to find out how to text – or even video chat – with geographically distant relatives. Using these technologies can help people stay connected to friends and family once the holidays are over.</p>
<p>[<em>Science, politics, religion or just plain interesting articles:</em> <a href="https://memberservices.theconversation.com/newsletters/?nl=science&source=inline-checkoutweekly">Check out The Conversation’s weekly newsletters</a>.]</p>
<p>That will likely require some additional patience on the part of the younger technology coach. Older adults <a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/24475051">learn at slower rates than younger generations</a>. And it may be harder for them to <a href="http://www.apa.org/research/action/memory-changes.aspx">remember instructions</a>, so they might need to be shown how to use the device or app several times. A key factor is making sure the relatives know they <a href="http://journals.sagepub.com/doi/full/10.1177/0733464815609440">can ask for help</a> when technical difficulties inevitably strike.</p>
<p>If older family members see how excited their descendants are about using digital devices, they may decide to cross the generational digital divide – which can help them live more enjoyable, connected lives not just during the holidays, but all throughout the year.</p><img src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/88763/count.gif" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" />
<p class="fine-print"><em><span>Shelia R. Cotten has received funding from the National Institutes of Health/National Institute on Aging for part of the research that she conducted that was cited in this article as background literature (Grant #5R01AG030425).</span></em></p>Older relatives often object to younger people using their smartphones and tablets during family gatherings. But digital devices can connect distant relatives year-round.Shelia R. Cotten, Professor of Media and Information, Clemson UniversityLicensed as Creative Commons – attribution, no derivatives.tag:theconversation.com,2011:article/763782017-05-02T10:40:12Z2017-05-02T10:40:12ZWhy parents should resist the temptation of term-time holidays<p>The Easter holidays are over – and the long wait for the more generous summer break begins. In just a couple of months, schools will break up, air fares will rise, beaches will be busy and the cost of a family holiday will multiply. So surely it makes sense for parents to be allowed to take their children out of school during term time? </p>
<p>That is the appealing option that prompted <a href="https://www.theguardian.com/education/2017/apr/06/supreme-court-upholds-ban-on-term-time-holidays-jon-platt-unauthorised-break">one irate father</a> to take his legal case all the way to the Supreme Court to establish a ruling earlier this year. Jon Platt, a British businessman, had been fined £120 after he took his daughter to Walt Disney World during school term. </p>
<p>The resulting (and popular) debate centred on whether parents know what is best for their child – or at least that they know better than the state.</p>
<p>The argument for parental authority over school attendance is initially compelling. Travel can be an important and valuable experience for children. It gives them a break from school work, allows for time together as a family, and can no doubt be educational. Schools and education authorities argue, however, that missing school has a negative impact on academic progress. </p>
<p>Parents and children have an important connection to each other that involves responsibilities and benefits. So an assertion of parents’ rights might seem to make sense. </p>
<p><a href="http://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1111/1468-4446.12035/full">Research</a> over the last two decades has shown how parenting has <a href="https://www.amazon.co.uk/Cultural-Contradictions-Motherhood-Sharon-Hays/dp/0300076525**">become increasingly intensive</a>, with parents spending more time, money and energy on ensuring that their children do well. There is more popular discussion about how <a href="http://journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/10.1177/0038038514560260">parents should behave and evermore political interventions</a> to make them behave in particular ways. </p>
<p>Parents are expected to know what is best for their child and act appropriately. If so much responsibility for children is placed on parents then surely parents should be allowed some flexibility in how they perform their role? Mothers and fathers could feel justified in joining with campaigns like the one orchestrated by <a href="http://parentswantasay.co.uk/about-us/">“Parents want a say”</a> to argue that if their children are not suffering then the state should reduce its interference in the private sphere and support parental authority. </p>
<figure class="align-center ">
<img alt="" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/165901/original/file-20170419-2434-1j9lzzu.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/165901/original/file-20170419-2434-1j9lzzu.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=450&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/165901/original/file-20170419-2434-1j9lzzu.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=450&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/165901/original/file-20170419-2434-1j9lzzu.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=450&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/165901/original/file-20170419-2434-1j9lzzu.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=566&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/165901/original/file-20170419-2434-1j9lzzu.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=566&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/165901/original/file-20170419-2434-1j9lzzu.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=566&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px">
<figcaption>
<span class="caption">Cultural education.</span>
<span class="attribution"><span class="source">Abi Skipp/Flikr</span></span>
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</figure>
<p>So was Platt right to think that he should be able to take his daughter on holiday when he likes? He had argued that his child, then seven, had a school attendance record of over 90% – high enough to fulfil the legal requirement of “regular” attendance to ensure she was getting a good education. In other words, it might be justified for the state to intervene if there was strong evidence of an adverse effect on the child because of poor parenting decisions. But where there is no evidence of this, parents should be allowed to act as they deem fit. He <a href="http://www.telegraph.co.uk/travel/news/Parent-who-won-term-time-holiday-court-case-fined-again/">told a newspaper</a>: “Quite frankly, parents need to decide for themselves.”</p>
<p>But there is a good argument that they shouldn’t be allowed to decide – not because of the claim that schools know the needs of children best. But that selfish individualism should be challenged. </p>
<h2>A lesson learned</h2>
<p>It may not matter to your child if they miss a few days of school – but it will have an impact on others. Teachers are expected to ensure that children catch up with work they have missed which means less attention on the majority. If significant numbers of children are absent (as might be the tendency if parents take a few extra days around formal holidays) then the problem multiplies. </p>
<p>If you are the only parent who takes their child out there may be little ill effect, but if others start to do the same then the consequences escalate. <a href="http://press.princeton.edu/titles/10385.html">Recent research</a> by political philosophers on the rights of parents has argued that these need to be limited so that individuals cannot significantly advantage their own children over others, and that is what these parents are doing. </p>
<p>It could be argued even more forcefully that the benefits of your own child are marginal compared to the negative impact on other children. So the best reason for not taking your child out of school to go on holiday isn’t about the risk of educational disadvantage they face, or that it is going against government rules. It is that parenting shouldn’t be about seeking to confer an unfair advantage for your child over others.</p><img src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/76378/count.gif" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" />
<p class="fine-print"><em><span>Esther Dermott does not work for, consult, own shares in or receive funding from any company or organisation that would benefit from this article, and has disclosed no relevant affiliations beyond their academic appointment.</span></em></p>The knock-on effect for schools is a heavy burden.Esther Dermott, Professor of Sociology, University of BristolLicensed as Creative Commons – attribution, no derivatives.tag:theconversation.com,2011:article/521862015-12-22T11:08:22Z2015-12-22T11:08:22ZHow the Nazis co-opted Christmas<figure><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/106844/original/image-20151221-27890-jnjtkf.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=496&fit=clip" /><figcaption><span class="caption">A postcard depicts Adolf Hitler posing with a child and a Christmas tree. </span> <span class="attribution"><span class="license">Author provided</span></span></figcaption></figure><p>In 1921, in a Munich beer hall, newly appointed Nazi party leader Adolf Hitler gave a Christmas speech to an excited crowd. </p>
<p>According to undercover police observers, 4,000 supporters cheered when Hitler condemned “the cowardly Jews for breaking the world-liberator on the cross” and swore “not to rest until the Jews…lay shattered on the ground.” Later, the crowd sang holiday carols and nationalist hymns around a Christmas tree. Working-class attendees received charitable gifts. </p>
<p>For Germans in the 1920s and 1930s, this combination of familiar holiday observance, nationalist propaganda and anti-Semitism was hardly unusual. As the Nazi party grew in size and scope – and eventually took power in 1933 – committed propagandists worked to further “Nazify” Christmas. Redefining familiar traditions and designing new symbols and rituals, they hoped to channel the main tenets of National Socialism through the popular holiday.</p>
<p>Given state control of public life, it’s not surprising that Nazi officials were successful in <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fPbtyT6weK4">promoting and propagating their version of Christmas</a> through repeated radio broadcasts and news articles.</p>
<p>But under any totalitarian regime, there can be a wide disparity between public and private life, between the rituals of the city square and those of the home. In my research, I was interested in how Nazi symbols and rituals penetrated private, family festivities – away from the gaze of party leaders.</p>
<p>While some Germans <em>did</em> resist the heavy-handed, politicized appropriation of <a href="http://uncpress.unc.edu/browse/book_detail?title_id=1780">Germany’s favorite holiday</a>, many actually embraced a Nazified holiday that evoked the family’s place in the “<a href="https://books.google.com/books?id=DGJy5Ptzqp0C">racial state</a>,” free of Jews and other outsiders. </p>
<h2>Redefining Christmas</h2>
<p>One of the most striking features of private celebration in the Nazi period was the redefinition of Christmas as a neo-pagan, Nordic celebration. Rather on focus on the holiday’s religious origins, the Nazi version celebrated the supposed heritage of the Aryan race, the label Nazis gave to “racially acceptable” members of the German racial state.</p>
<p>According to Nazi intellectuals, cherished holiday traditions drew on winter solstice rituals practiced by “Germanic” tribes before the arrival of Christianity. Lighting candles on the Christmas tree, for example, recalled pagan desires for the “return of light” after the shortest day of the year.</p>
<p>Scholars have called attention to the manipulative function of these and other <a href="http://www.cambridge.org/us/academic/subjects/history/regional-and-world-history-general-interest/invention-tradition-2">invented traditions</a>. But that’s no reason to assume they were unpopular. Since the 1860s, German historians, theologians and popular writers had argued that German holiday observances were holdovers from pre-Christian pagan rituals and popular folk superstitions. </p>
<p>So because these ideas and traditions had a lengthy history, Nazi propagandists were able to easily cast Christmas as a celebration of pagan German nationalism. A vast state apparatus (centered in the Nazi Ministry for Propaganda and Enlightenment) ensured that a Nazified holiday dominated public space and celebration in the Third Reich.</p>
<p>But two aspects of the Nazi version of Christmas were relatively new. </p>
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<img alt="" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/106839/original/image-20151221-27887-1of9g9y.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=237&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/106839/original/image-20151221-27887-1of9g9y.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=693&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/106839/original/image-20151221-27887-1of9g9y.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=693&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/106839/original/image-20151221-27887-1of9g9y.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=693&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/106839/original/image-20151221-27887-1of9g9y.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=871&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/106839/original/image-20151221-27887-1of9g9y.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=871&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/106839/original/image-20151221-27887-1of9g9y.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=871&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px">
<figcaption>
<span class="caption">A Christmas-themed stamp emphasizes light.</span>
<span class="attribution"><span class="license">Author provided</span></span>
</figcaption>
</figure>
<p>First, because Nazi ideologues saw organized religion as an enemy of the totalitarian state, <a href="http://research.calvin.edu/german-propaganda-archive/weihnacht44.htm">propagandists sought to deemphasize</a> – or eliminate altogether – the Christian aspects of the holiday. Official celebrations might mention a supreme being, but they more prominently featured solstice and “light” rituals that supposedly captured the holiday’s pagan origins. </p>
<p>Second, as Hitler’s 1921 speech suggests, Nazi celebration evoked racial purity and anti-Semitism. Before the Nazis took power in 1933, ugly and open attacks on German Jews typified holiday propaganda. </p>
<p>Blatant anti-Semitism more or less disappeared after 1933, as the regime sought to stabilize its control over a population tired of political strife, though Nazi celebrations still excluded those deemed “unfit” by the regime. Countless media images of invariably blond-haired, blue-eyed German families gathered around the Christmas tree helped normalize ideologies of racial purity. </p>
<p>Open anti-Semitism nonetheless cropped up at Christmastime. Many would boycott Jewish-owned department stores. And the front cover of a 1935 mail order Christmas catalog, which pictured a fair-haired mother wrapping Christmas presents, included a sticker assuring customers that “the department store has been taken over by an Aryan!” </p>
<p>It’s a small, almost banal example. But it speaks volumes. In Nazi Germany, even shopping for a gift could naturalize anti-Semitism and reinforce <a href="https://books.google.com/books?id=PCuUxc1TZ_QC">the “social death” of Jews in the Third Reich</a>.</p>
<p>The message was clear: only “Aryans” could participate in the celebration.</p>
<h2>Taking the ‘Christ’ out of Christmas</h2>
<p>According to National Socialist theorists, <a href="https://books.google.com/books/about/Mothers_in_the_Fatherland.html?id=iERqQgAACAAJ">women</a> – particularly mothers – were crucial for strengthening the bonds between private life and the “new spirit” of the German racial state.</p>
<p>Everyday acts of celebration – wrapping presents, decorating the home, cooking “German” holiday foods and organizing family celebrations – were linked to a cult of sentimental “Nordic” nationalism.</p>
<figure class="align-center ">
<img alt="" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/106838/original/image-20151221-27854-1ofit03.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/106838/original/image-20151221-27854-1ofit03.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=448&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/106838/original/image-20151221-27854-1ofit03.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=448&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/106838/original/image-20151221-27854-1ofit03.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=448&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/106838/original/image-20151221-27854-1ofit03.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=563&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/106838/original/image-20151221-27854-1ofit03.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=563&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/106838/original/image-20151221-27854-1ofit03.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=563&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px">
<figcaption>
<span class="caption">Christmas tree bulbs featuring the swastika were only one of a number of ways that Christmas became Nazified.</span>
<span class="attribution"><span class="license">Author provided</span></span>
</figcaption>
</figure>
<p>Propagandists proclaimed that as “priestess” and “protector of house and hearth,” the German mother could use Christmas to “bring the spirit of the German home back to life.” The holiday issues of women’s magazines, Nazified Christmas books and Nazi carols tinged conventional family customs with the ideology of the regime.</p>
<p>This sort of ideological manipulation took everyday forms. Mothers and children were encouraged to make homemade decorations shaped like “Odin’s Sun Wheel” and bake holiday cookies shaped like a loop (a fertility symbol). The ritual of lighting candles on the Christmas tree was said to create an atmosphere of “pagan demon magic” that would subsume the Star of Bethlehem and the birth of Jesus in feelings of “Germanness.” </p>
<p>Family singing epitomized the porous boundaries between private and official forms of celebration. </p>
<figure class="align-right zoomable">
<a href="https://images.theconversation.com/files/106837/original/image-20151221-27863-1gayzdu.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=1000&fit=clip"><img alt="" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/106837/original/image-20151221-27863-1gayzdu.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=237&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/106837/original/image-20151221-27863-1gayzdu.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=839&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/106837/original/image-20151221-27863-1gayzdu.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=839&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/106837/original/image-20151221-27863-1gayzdu.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=839&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/106837/original/image-20151221-27863-1gayzdu.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=1054&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/106837/original/image-20151221-27863-1gayzdu.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=1054&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/106837/original/image-20151221-27863-1gayzdu.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=1054&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px"></a>
<figcaption>
<span class="caption">Sheet music for the popular carol Exalted Night of the Clear Stars.</span>
<span class="attribution"><span class="license">Author provided</span></span>
</figcaption>
</figure>
<p>Propagandists tirelessly promoted numerous Nazified Christmas songs, which replaced Christian themes with the regime’s racial ideologies. Exalted Night of the Clear Stars, the most famous Nazi carol, was reprinted in Nazi songbooks, broadcast in radio programs, performed at countless public celebrations – and sung at home. </p>
<p>Indeed, Exalted Night became so familiar that it could still be sung in the 1950s as part of an ordinary family holiday (and, apparently, as <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_Kc8L1vA0zI">part of some public performances today!</a>). </p>
<p>While the song’s melody mimics a traditional carol, the lyrics deny the Christian origins of the holiday. Verses of stars, light and an eternal mother suggest a world redeemed through faith in National Socialism – not Jesus.</p>
<h2>Conflict or consensus among the German public?</h2>
<p>We’ll never know exactly how many German families sang Exalted Night or baked Christmas cookies shaped like a Germanic sun wheel. But we do have some records of the popular response to the Nazi holiday, mostly from official sources. </p>
<p>For example, the “activity reports” of the National Socialist Women’s League (NSF) show that the redefinition of Christmas created some disagreement among members. NSF files note that tensions flared when propagandists pressed too hard to sideline religious observance, leading to “much doubt and discontent.” </p>
<p>Religious traditions often clashed with ideological goals: was it acceptable for “convinced National Socialists” to celebrate Christmas with Christian carols and nativity plays? How could Nazi believers observe a Nazi holiday when stores mostly sold conventional holiday goods and rarely stocked Nazi Christmas books?</p>
<p>Meanwhile, German clergymen openly resisted Nazi attempts to take Christ out of Christmas. In Düsseldorf, clergymen used Christmas to encourage women to join their respective women’s clubs. Catholic clergy threatened to excommunicate women who joined the NSF. Elsewhere, women of faith boycotted NSF Christmas parties and charity drives. </p>
<p>Still, such dissent never really challenged the main tenets of the Nazi holiday. </p>
<p>Reports on public opinion compiled by the Nazi secret police often commented on the popularity of Nazi Christmas festivities. Well into the Second World War, when looming defeat increasingly discredited the Nazi holiday, the secret police reported that complaints about official policies dissolved in an overall “Christmas mood.”</p>
<p>Despite conflicts over Christianity, many Germans accepted the Nazification of Christmas. The return to colorful and enjoyable pagan “Germanic” traditions promised to revitalize family celebration. Not least, observing a Nazified holiday symbolized racial purity and national belonging. “Aryans” could celebrate German Christmas. Jews could not.</p>
<p>The Nazification of family celebration thus revealed the paradoxical and contested terrain of private life in the Third Reich. The apparently banal, everyday decision to sing a particular Christmas carol, or bake a holiday cookie, became either an act of political dissent or an expression of support for national socialism.</p><img src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/52186/count.gif" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" />
<p class="fine-print"><em><span>Joe Perry has received funding from the German Academic Exchange Service and Georgia State University. </span></em></p>Through the Nazification of Christmas, the regime was able to gain the support of ordinary Germans.Joe Perry, Associate Professor of History, Georgia State UniversityLicensed as Creative Commons – attribution, no derivatives.tag:theconversation.com,2011:article/507162015-11-24T15:26:18Z2015-11-24T15:26:18ZExpert roundtable: the psychological benefits of our Thanksgiving rituals<figure><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/102685/original/image-20151121-397-sdxb5l.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=496&fit=clip" /><figcaption><span class="caption">Hungry for more than just the turkey.</span> <span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="http://www.shutterstock.com/pic-325633145/stock-photo-thanksgiving-turkey-sits-on-platter-ready-for-holiday-dinner.html">Turkey image via www.shutterstock.com.</a></span></figcaption></figure><p><strong><em>When Americans gather together around a table groaning with favorite dishes on the fourth Thursday of November, what are we doing beyond filling our bellies with turkey and pie? We convened four experts in the psychology of family traditions and shared meals for a roundtable discussion about what ritual means in the context of Thanksgiving.</em></strong></p>
<p><strong>Anne Fishel, <em>psychologist and author of <a href="http://www.amacombooks.org/HomeForDinner.htm">Home for Dinner</a></em></strong>: I think of Thanksgiving as the mother of all family dinners. As a ritual, it has all the <a href="http://books.wwnorton.com/books/Rituals-in-Families-and-Family-Therapy/">important ingredients</a> – a prescribed time and place; aspects that are predictable and repeated year after year (signature foods) and some that are novel (guests added and departed, new family stories and arguments); and meaning conveyed through symbols. Each year, families come together to revisit something familiar but keep adding new layers of meaning, so that the ritual is reinterpreted. </p>
<p><strong>Janine Roberts, <em>family therapist and author of <a href="https://rowman.com/ISBN/9780765701565/Rituals-for-Our-Times-Celebrating-Healing-and-Changing-Our-Lives-and-Our-Relationships">Rituals for Our Times</a></em></strong>: I think another reason rituals are so powerful is because they’re active and have many sensory elements to them – smelling foods, seeing the lit candles, hearing the rhythm of words as thanks are given.</p>
<p><strong>Barbara Fiese, <em>psychologist and author of <a href="http://www.yalebooks.com/yupbooks/book.asp?isbn=9780300116960">Family Routines and Rituals</a></em></strong>: </p>
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<a href="https://images.theconversation.com/files/102701/original/image-20151122-416-1du2n8o.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=1000&fit=clip"><img alt="" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/102701/original/image-20151122-416-1du2n8o.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=237&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/102701/original/image-20151122-416-1du2n8o.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=644&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/102701/original/image-20151122-416-1du2n8o.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=644&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/102701/original/image-20151122-416-1du2n8o.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=644&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/102701/original/image-20151122-416-1du2n8o.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=809&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/102701/original/image-20151122-416-1du2n8o.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=809&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/102701/original/image-20151122-416-1du2n8o.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=809&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px"></a>
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<span class="caption">Things can and do go wrong when expectations are sky-high.</span>
<span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://www.flickr.com/photos/69302634@N02/11616291635">Helena Jacoba</a>, <a class="license" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/">CC BY</a></span>
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<p>Another key ingredient is great expectations. Because Thanksgiving is repeated every year, there’s a buildup to the day – making sure everyone is included, dishes assigned, and lots and lots of planning around food. Expectations are sometimes a double-edged sword. You expect the turkey to taste fantastic; sometimes it does… and sometimes it’s on the dry side. You expect guests and relatives to be warm and inviting; sometimes they are… and sometimes they aren’t. Emotional connections keep this ritual going – along with some pretty good food.</p>
<p><strong>Bill Doherty, <em>researcher and family therapist</em>:</strong> I’d add that Thanksgiving has an element that makes for longstanding family traditions: an intergenerational ritual that we remember from childhood and gradually assume more responsibility for over the life cycle. There are also poignant times when the chief architect of the Thanksgiving ritual grows older and has to pass the mantle to the next generation, sometimes not willingly.</p>
<figure class="align-center zoomable">
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<figcaption>
<span class="caption">Thanksgiving’s when even iconoclasts turn to familiar favorites, passed down from relatives.</span>
<span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://www.flickr.com/photos/chiotsrun/4456597153">Susy Morris</a>, <a class="license" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc/4.0/">CC BY-NC</a></span>
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<p><strong><em>What is the value of these kinds of traditions and rituals? What do we get out of participating, in terms of our health?</em></strong></p>
<p><strong>Barbara</strong>: Our group has conducted research on how routines and rituals are related to both physical and mental health. Through direct observation of family mealtimes at home, we’ve found that how families communicate with one another during meals is <a href="http://dx.doi.org/10.1016/j.ehb.2012.04.004">related to the children’s health</a>. For example, when families show genuine concern about their child’s daily activities – such as asking about their day or following up on how a test went in school – teachers report these children are less likely to show acting-out behaviors in school. What’s more, these interactions make children with <a href="http://dx.doi.org/10.1111/j.1467-8624.2010.01545.x">chronic health conditions such as asthma</a> feel more secure, and they’re more likely to report that they feel better throughout the day.</p>
<p>These are just correlational studies – we can’t say that positive communication <em>causes</em> better health outcomes. But we do think that repeating these positive behaviors – attending to emotions during meals, recognizing other’s concerns, demonstrating you truly care about what’s happening in each other’s lives – over time provides a supportive emotional climate for healthy development.</p>
<p>For rituals such as Thanksgiving, these emotional connections come to represent what it means to be a member of a particular family. We’ve also found in our research that when parents have <a href="http://dx.doi.org/10.1111/1540-5834.00019">more positive memories of family rituals</a> from when they were growing up, they also tend to interact more positively with their children, which in turn leads to better mental health for the kids. It’s hard to escape the intergenerational pattern of these rituals.</p>
<figure class="align-left zoomable">
<a href="https://images.theconversation.com/files/102702/original/image-20151122-416-1kls05d.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=1000&fit=clip"><img alt="" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/102702/original/image-20151122-416-1kls05d.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=237&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/102702/original/image-20151122-416-1kls05d.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=903&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/102702/original/image-20151122-416-1kls05d.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=903&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/102702/original/image-20151122-416-1kls05d.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=903&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/102702/original/image-20151122-416-1kls05d.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=1135&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/102702/original/image-20151122-416-1kls05d.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=1135&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/102702/original/image-20151122-416-1kls05d.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=1135&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px"></a>
<figcaption>
<span class="caption">Preparing together for the feast can help bond the generations together.</span>
<span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://www.flickr.com/photos/gesika22/5608048741">Jessica Fiess-Hill</a>, <a class="license" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/">CC BY</a></span>
</figcaption>
</figure>
<p><strong>Anne</strong>: There’s another intergenerational aspect of Thanksgiving – joining a Thanksgiving meal makes us feel we’re part of something bigger than ourselves when we connect to our extended family and to the generations that preceded us. Often, this larger family is represented by stories told about the food or about family members. Kids who know their family’s stories <a href="http://www.psychology.emory.edu/cognition/fivush/lab/FivushLabWebsite/Publications.html">grow up to be more resilient</a> – better able to withstand the slings and arrows of everyday life. And adults who get to share their stories feel valued. </p>
<p><strong>Bill</strong>: The classic outcomes of regular rituals for families are coherence (a sense of identity) and connection (a sense of closeness). Beyond the good health outcomes of positive family interaction during family dinner rituals, in a new study, my colleagues and I have found that barriers to good interaction – such as cellphone use, people getting up from the table and arguments – were even more strongly related (in a negative direction) to children’s psychological well-being and academic performance. The implication is that we have to pay attention to doing some things well during meals – such as staying at the table and laughing together – but also avoid negative interactions.</p>
<p><strong>Barbara</strong>: How true, Bill. We recently used an <a href="http://dx.doi.org/10.1037/cfp0000047">experimental approach to document</a> how disruptions can really mess up the power of good positive mealtime interactions. We have <a href="http://familyresiliency.illinois.edu/about/about_facilities_resources.html">a research home</a> here at the University of Illinois, complete with dining area, kitchen and living room. We brought 60 families into the home (one family at a time, of course) and exposed half of them to a very loud vacuum cleaner for the first 10 to 15 minutes of a meal. People exposed to this racket got up from the table more often, engaged in less positive communication and ate more unhealthy foods (Oreos) than those who were not exposed to the loud noise. We think this is an analog of all the intrusions you often see at meal gatherings – the cellphones, tablets and televisions that disrupt the positive benefits of sharing meals together.</p>
<figure class="align-center zoomable">
<a href="https://images.theconversation.com/files/102704/original/image-20151122-435-1pdul7h.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=1000&fit=clip"><img alt="" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/102704/original/image-20151122-435-1pdul7h.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/102704/original/image-20151122-435-1pdul7h.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/102704/original/image-20151122-435-1pdul7h.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/102704/original/image-20151122-435-1pdul7h.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/102704/original/image-20151122-435-1pdul7h.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/102704/original/image-20151122-435-1pdul7h.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/102704/original/image-20151122-435-1pdul7h.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px"></a>
<figcaption>
<span class="caption">Doing the dishes has multiple beneficiaries.</span>
<span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="http://www.shutterstock.com/pic.mhtml?id=225569962">Family image via www.shutterstock.com.</a></span>
</figcaption>
</figure>
<p><strong>Bill</strong>: Great to see experimental research in this area, Barbara! On the positive side of the equation, we found something intriguing in a survey of 1,000 children ages eight to 18. Participating in cleanup after the meal was right up there with more traditional correlates of children’s well-being outcomes, such as having a good conversation and laughing together. Active participation is good for family rituals, as opposed to the consumer approach where someone puts on Thanksgiving for everyone else to enjoy. </p>
<p><strong>Anne</strong>: Another study found elementary school kids who made lunch were <a href="http://dx.doi.org/10.1016/S0022-3182(98)70339-5">much more likely to eat it</a>. One of the great features of Thanksgiving is that it usually pulls in many cooks to the kitchen. Guests often come bearing a homemade pie or cranberry sauce. I wish that this spirit of sharing the work of dinner could carry to everyday family dinners. </p>
<p><strong>Barbara</strong>: And let’s not forget that Thanksgiving is traditionally a time for expressing gratitude about health, family and personal circumstances. Psychologists are finding that simply <a href="http://dx.doi.org/10.1037/0022-3514.84.2.377">enumerating the things you’re grateful for</a> can give you a greater sense of well-being. Family researchers have recently turned their attention to the role that forgiveness may play in <a href="http://dx.doi.org/10.1111/j.1741-3729.2006.00411.x">marital satisfaction and health</a>. Forgiveness is a complex process that requires genuine interpersonal change. If we take time to pause at this time of the year to let go of petty transgressions and/or annoyances in relationships, perhaps this will allow greater perspective about the gratitude we can feel for what we have.</p>
<figure class="align-center zoomable">
<a href="https://images.theconversation.com/files/102917/original/image-20151124-18271-erv83r.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=1000&fit=clip"><img alt="" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/102917/original/image-20151124-18271-erv83r.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/102917/original/image-20151124-18271-erv83r.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/102917/original/image-20151124-18271-erv83r.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/102917/original/image-20151124-18271-erv83r.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/102917/original/image-20151124-18271-erv83r.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/102917/original/image-20151124-18271-erv83r.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/102917/original/image-20151124-18271-erv83r.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px"></a>
<figcaption>
<span class="caption">Family members from the youngest to the oldest can participate in giving thanks around the table.</span>
<span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="http://www.shutterstock.com/pic.mhtml?id=341515658&src=lb-29877982">Family via www.shutterstock.com.</a></span>
</figcaption>
</figure>
<p><strong>Janine</strong>: Being attentive to all the different ages of people who are there at Thanksgiving is central to making sure giving thanks is part of the gathering. How can elders connect with children and vice versa in meaningful ways? One family wrote simple thanks cards (the youngest members drew) highlighting things they were thankful for over the past year and then shared them as a way to focus dinnertime talk on gratitude and appreciation. And some families choose to serve food at a community Thanksgiving for the homeless or do other types of service to connect with those who don’t have access to the same level of resources.</p>
<p><strong><em>What is participation in these rituals like for people who don’t fit the Normal Rockwell painting version?</em></strong></p>
<p><strong>Janine</strong>: The media and people selling things push expectations by featuring, for example, photos of the “perfect” family – usually a white, heterosexual couple, two children, and the dog and cat – with huge smiles sitting down to a delicious Thanksgiving meal. This sends difficult messages to families that are actually the majority: single-parent or remarried; Latino, black, Native American and Asian families; bicultural and biracial families; gay, lesbian or transgender; or families who have recently experienced a death or other major loss.</p>
<p><strong>Barbara</strong>: Janine, you raise some really good points. These rituals are times of remembrance. When we tell the same stories over and over again, often we’re remembering people who are no longer there, even as we miss the laughter and joke-telling of those who are gone. It’s also a way to share across generations so the younger family members can learn about older folks that they may have never met. Often these are stories that are told about ritual gatherings like Thanksgiving.</p>
<p><strong>Anne</strong>: In my work with <a href="http://thefamilydinnerproject.org">The Family Dinner Project</a>, we try to push back on visions of family dinner that are constraining. Instead of invoking the bygone 1950s era of women doing all the cooking, we emphasize the importance of sharing the workload. And rather than focus on trying to cook a perfect, gourmet meal, we concentrate on what happens at the table in terms of having fun and interesting conversation.</p>
<figure class="align-center zoomable">
<a href="https://images.theconversation.com/files/102700/original/image-20151122-408-5u0i6q.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=1000&fit=clip"><img alt="" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/102700/original/image-20151122-408-5u0i6q.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/102700/original/image-20151122-408-5u0i6q.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=450&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/102700/original/image-20151122-408-5u0i6q.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=450&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/102700/original/image-20151122-408-5u0i6q.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=450&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/102700/original/image-20151122-408-5u0i6q.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=566&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/102700/original/image-20151122-408-5u0i6q.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=566&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/102700/original/image-20151122-408-5u0i6q.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=566&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px"></a>
<figcaption>
<span class="caption">Friendsgiving is one newer spin on the traditional feast.</span>
<span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://www.flickr.com/photos/7666989@N04/4141436956">Cecilia</a>, <a class="license" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/">CC BY</a></span>
</figcaption>
</figure>
<p><strong><em>Our current national moment is characterized by more “nontraditional” families and more of us separated by distance from those we care about. How does a somewhat old-fashioned harvest holiday maintain its value on the annual calendar?</em></strong></p>
<p><strong>Barbara</strong>: A marker of successful rituals is that they also change with the times. As we bring new members into the fold, we make room for new traditions. We can redefine “family” so neighbors, newcomers to the community and international visitors can have a place at the table. These are times to learn about other traditions – expand our group and hopefully expand our world.</p>
<p><strong>Anne</strong>: I agree that change is a vital characteristic of vibrant rituals. You also made me think about ways the larger cultural observance of Thanksgiving has changed – in particular the advent of <a href="http://www.npr.org/sections/thesalt/2015/11/19/456536083/how-to-put-real-giving-into-the-friendsgiving-feast">Friendsgiving</a>, a more casual get-together before or after Thanksgiving that highlights the importance of friends.</p>
<p><strong>Bill</strong>: The hallmark of successful rituals over time is a combination of predictability and flexibility. You can change the people, for example, but keep the turkey! Sometimes when a family has gone through a major loss, they may decide to try something very different the next Thanksgiving. After the death of the mother in a family with young children, the father and children decided to travel and be in a different part of the country with family friends the first Thanksgiving after their loss. Families need cultural permission to emphasize stability of rituals when they need that, and innovation when they need something different.</p>
<p><strong>Janine:</strong> Well-said, Bill. I’ve worked with a number of families over the decades who, to honor changing values and dietary needs, have made vegetarian dishes the heart of the meal. After all, the “Turkey Day” tradition is “thanks to an <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Curious-Customs-Thaddeus-F-Tuleja/dp/0517566540">aggressive marketing campaign on the part of the poultry industry</a>.” Create what works for you and leave behind what doesn’t. And we shouldn’t forget that holidays and rituals can be very different in different communities – some Native Americans, for example, mark Thanksgiving as a <a href="http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/native-americans-national-day-of-mourning_5650c46ee4b0258edb31c3ca">National Day of Mourning</a>.</p>
<p><strong>Anne</strong>: It’s that balance of sameness and change that makes this ritual so important. Adults need rituals as much as kids do because they help us step back from the everyday hubbub and feel connected to something bigger and something evolving.</p>
<p>Annual holidays remind us of the continuity of family life, linking us to the generations who preceded us and to earlier times in our own family when we celebrated this same holiday. Against the predictable canvas of the turkey and mashed potatoes, we’re also reminded that our family keeps changing. A grandfather’s death leaves an empty chair. A cousin is expecting her first child. An adult child has gone to spend the holiday with his girlfriend’s family. I think it’s important to embrace change by adding some new elements: you might invite someone new or add a different twist to your mother’s stuffing, or play a new game. The balance of familiarity and novelty keeps holidays feeling meaningful. Maintaining our connections year after year gives an anchor.</p><img src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/50716/count.gif" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" />
<p class="fine-print"><em><span>Barbara Fiese receives funding from the Dairy Research Institute, Feeding America, USDA, NIH, and the Christopher Family Foundation. </span></em></p><p class="fine-print"><em><span>Anne Fishel is affiliated with The Family Dinner Project.</span></em></p><p class="fine-print"><em><span>For his research on family meals Bill Doherty receives funding from Barilla America, the pasta company, for its Share the Table Initiative. None of the research dealt with pasta, however!</span></em></p><p class="fine-print"><em><span>Janine Roberts is affiliated with Family Process, the leading family therapy journal. </span></em></p>Our panel discusses the benefits of gathering for an annual holiday meal. Traditions and rituals give us a sense of identity and closeness with those we love – and come with mental and physical health benefits too.Barbara Fiese, Director of the Family Resiliency Center and Professor of Human Development & Family Studies, University of Illinois at Urbana-ChampaignAnne Fishel, Associate Clinical Professor of Psychology, Harvard UniversityBill Doherty, Professor of Family Social Science, University of MinnesotaJanine Roberts, Professor Emerita of Family Therapy, UMass AmherstLicensed as Creative Commons – attribution, no derivatives.tag:theconversation.com,2011:article/382302015-03-05T01:27:16Z2015-03-05T01:27:16ZEducation Department: no term-time holidays for students<figure><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/73750/original/image-20150304-25675-122c1pu.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=496&fit=clip" /><figcaption><span class="caption">Cracking down on family holidays during term time is based on evidence that absenteeism has an adverse effect on school results. But is this based on absenteeism, or the reason the child is absent?</span> <span class="attribution"><span class="source">Shutterstock</span></span></figcaption></figure><p>In a recent article, <a href="http://www.smh.com.au/nsw/public-school-principals-crack-down-on-family-holidays-in-term-time-20150228-13p9ky.html">The Sydney Morning Herald</a> reported:</p>
<blockquote>
<p>Public school principals will crack down on family holidays during term time with new rules stating students will be allowed to miss school only if they are competing in elite sport, arts or in the entertainment industry.</p>
</blockquote>
<p>The policy of the <a href="https://www.det.nsw.edu.au/policies/student_admin/attendance/sch_polproc/implementation_2_PD20050259.shtml?level=">NSW Education Department</a> was changed last month. Now, <a href="https://www.det.nsw.edu.au/policies/student_admin/attendance/sch_polproc/PD20050259.shtml">principals in government schools</a> are able to “decline to accept an explanation for absence and record the absence as unjustified”, especially if that absence is for a family holiday the principal considers unacceptable.</p>
<p>Cracking down on family trips seems to be based on evidence that absenteeism leads to poorer school results. However, whether it is the absenteeism or the reason for being absent that has greater effect remains unclear.</p>
<h2>The UK has been cracking down on truant families for years</h2>
<p><a href="http://www.telegraph.co.uk/women/mother-tongue/10695431/Why-term-time-holiday-fines-are-worth-the-risk-for-some.html">Since 1996</a>, fines have been issued to UK families who take a holiday during term time. Failure to ensure your child attends school is an offence under Section 444 of the UK’s Education Act (1996). As such, according to <a href="http://www.theguardian.com/education/2014/jan/29/parents-children-holiday-school-terms">The Guardian</a>, </p>
<blockquote>
<p>parents have no legal right to take their children out of school during term time for holidays.</p>
</blockquote>
<p>One UK family was threatened with <a href="http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2923006/Couple-fall-foul-Government-s-term-time-holiday-crackdown-going-break-despite-refused-permission-son-school.html">court action</a> after their children accompanied them on a five-day trip. In <a href="http://www.theguardian.com/education/2014/may/25/parents-seek-judicial-review-on-term-time-holiday-crackdown">another case</a>, one family took the department to court over the school’s refusal to allow a term-time trip. </p>
<p>There are <a href="http://www.theguardian.com/education/2014/jan/29/parents-children-holiday-school-terms">fines</a> of up to £60 per pupil, per parent, rising to £120 if not paid within seven days. Further offences are punishable by court, a large £2,500 fine or a three-month jail sentence.</p>
<h2>The law in Australia</h2>
<p>In Australia, a NSW Education Department <a href="http://www.schools.nsw.edu.au/media/downloads/languagesupport/sch_attendance/parent_brochure/par_english.pdf">publication</a> says “regular school attendance will help your child to succeed in later life”. It also says, </p>
<blockquote>
<p>Parents and carers are encouraged not to withdraw their children from school for family holidays. Families should try to arrange holidays during school vacations. </p>
</blockquote>
<p>In <a href="http://ppr.det.qld.gov.au/education/management/Procedure%20Attachments/Roll%20Marking%20in%20State%20Schools/guidelines_excuses.doc">Queensland</a>, the department states that holidays during term time should be “actively discouraged”. Any absences of more than 10 consecutive school days require an exemption. </p>
<p>In <a href="http://www.education.vic.gov.au/school/principals/participation/Pages/managingabsence.aspx">Victoria</a>, the policy states that absences should be excused for family holidays “where the parent notifies the school in advance” and the student completes a “Student Absence Learning Plan”. </p>
<p>In Tasmania, Western Australia and the Northern Territory, the policy is quite vague. What is meant by chronic absence, how much time is allowable and how much leeway is given to families is a bit unclear.</p>
<p>In <a href="https://www.google.com.au/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=2&cad=rja&uact=8&ved=0CCQQFjAB&url=http%3A%2F%2Fdet.wa.edu.au%2Fdetcms%2Fcms-service%2Fdownload%2Fasset%3Fasset_id%3D8947103&ei=Cg30VPzCC4PZmgWD64H4CQ&usg=AFQjCNEKvkyFWxVTY4XqDy8fEs_67E65Rw&sig2=BTmvnNEecvn71AG7H-Vdpg&bvm=bv.87269000,d.dGY">WA</a>, truant officers police student absences. These officers have, among other powers, the ability to enter a place, such as a cinema or a games arcade, without paying to arrest offending children. </p>
<h2>Why do parents take trips during term time?</h2>
<p>Parents may choose to take a holiday during term time for a number of reasons. Most of them can be summed up in two phrases: <a href="http://www.news.com.au/national/nsw-act/the-new-class-of-absent-kids-as-parents-take-advantage-of-cheaper-overseas-holidays/story-fndo4bst-1226419724987">cheaper airfares and the tyranny of distance</a>. </p>
<p>In the UK, where this policy has been implemented for almost 20 years, the same reasons were given. Parents were visiting relatives, sometimes in Australia, when it was cheaper and the weather more pleasant. </p>
<h2>Why punish families who take a ‘non-gazetted’ holiday?</h2>
<p>One frequent justification is the effect on students’ academic achievement. Lila Mularczyk, a principal and head of the NSW Secondary Principals Association, was quoted in the SMH. She argued that time away adversely affects students’ education, because it detracts from a “coherent and consistent education”. </p>
<p>Stephen Zubrick from the University of Western Australia co-wrote a <a href="http://research.acer.edu.au/cgi/viewcontent.cgi?article=1221&context=research_conference">report</a> linking attendance and NAPLAN performance. The report argues that a 10-day absence could cause a child to drop a NAPLAN band.</p>
<p>In the UK, it has been suggested <a href="http://www.dailytelegraph.com.au/news/national/school-crackdown-on-mid-term-holidays-early-breaks-put-job-prospects-at-risk-parents-warned/story-fnpn0zn5-1227146579823?nk=468d77f028de31c5c241745703e44912">job prospects were poorer</a> among those who missed school for family holidays. However, the evidence for this seems vague.</p>
<p>There is <a href="http://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S014019711200036X">research</a> that suggests that school absenteeism affects performance more generally and outside of standardised tests. Too much absenteeism <a href="http://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S027273580700133X">has been associated</a> with school refusal and a number of conditions including anxiety, depression and other disruptive behaviour disorders. However, in these studies, the students missed much more than 20 days.</p>
<p>Significantly, the research on absenteeism focuses on students from <a href="http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3431954/">disadvantaged backgrounds</a> or those whose absenteeism is due to <a href="http://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1111/josh.12117/abstract;jsessionid=D92F2E96C34AACE91F5D0E98F44934D5.f02t03?deniedAccessCustomisedMessage=&userIsAuthenticated=false">poor health</a>. As such, it’s difficult to say what has the greater effect: poor health, disadvantage or absenteeism. </p>
<p>It may be useful to consider research suggesting the biggest <a href="http://soe.sagepub.com/content/84/4/281.short">influence on student achievement</a> is the family. Those families whose absenteeism is due to an expensive family overseas trip may not experience the same negative effects on school performance as absenteeism due to disadvantage.</p><img src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/38230/count.gif" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" />
<p class="fine-print"><em><span>Rebecca English does not work for, consult, own shares in or receive funding from any company or organisation that would benefit from this article, and has disclosed no relevant affiliations beyond their academic appointment.</span></em></p>Cracking down on family holidays during term time is based on evidence saying absenteeism has an adverse effect on school results. But is this based on absenteeism, or the reason the child is absent?Rebecca English, Lecturer in Education, Queensland University of TechnologyLicensed as Creative Commons – attribution, no derivatives.