tag:theconversation.com,2011:/ca/topics/childlessness-17139/articlesChildlessness – The Conversation2022-11-02T12:28:21Ztag:theconversation.com,2011:article/1904062022-11-02T12:28:21Z2022-11-02T12:28:21ZParents have very warm feelings toward other parents – here’s why that could be bad news for the child-free<figure><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/491977/original/file-20221026-13-is3hb1.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&rect=331%2C0%2C6086%2C4466&q=45&auto=format&w=496&fit=clip" /><figcaption><span class="caption">Parents exhibit what psychologists call 'in-group favoritism.'</span> <span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://www.gettyimages.com/detail/photo/little-baby-boys-bonding-royalty-free-image/1132272171?phrase=parents talking playground&adppopup=true">SolStock/E+ via Getty Images</a></span></figcaption></figure><p>The aphorism “birds of a feather flock together” describes the fact that people tend to prefer associating with others who are similar to themselves. The phenomenon goes by different names: Sociologists call it <a href="https://www.jstor.org/stable/2678628">homophily</a>, psychologists call it <a href="https://www.nature.com/articles/srep00460">in-group favoritism</a> and political scientists call it <a href="https://doi.org/10.1146/annurev-polisci-051117-073034">affective polarization</a>. It’s observed in <a href="https://doi.org/10.1177/0003122414531776">a wide range</a> of demographic and social characteristics including sex, race, religion, age, education and <a href="https://doi.org/10.1162/rest_a_01160">political party</a>.</p>
<p>But what about parental status? Do parents prefer other parents? What about child-free people who don’t want to be parents? Do these preferences even matter?</p>
<p><a href="https://theconversation.com/why-national-fertility-campaigns-are-unlikely-to-make-people-have-more-children-64918">Pronatalism</a>, a set of beliefs and political policies that promotes and favors human reproduction, is common in many countries. Therefore, it’s not surprising that people tend to have more positive attitudes about parents than they do about child-free people. </p>
<p>For example, people generally perceive parents as <a href="https://dx.doi.org/10.1037/men0000311">kinder</a> and <a href="https://doi.org/10.1027/1864-9335/a000455">more psychologically fulfilled</a> than child-free people. Additionally, <a href="https://doi.org/10.1007/s11199-016-0655-5">people express</a> feelings of admiration toward mothers and feelings of disgust toward child-free women.</p>
<p>However, these are general attitudes and don’t tell us about how people feel about others who have made the same reproductive choices as themselves. That’s why, <a href="https://doi.org/10.1038/s41598-022-15728-z">in a 2022 study</a> of 1,500 Michigan adults, <a href="https://scholar.google.com/citations?user=HVJX9_gAAAAJ&hl=en&oi=sra">we</a> <a href="https://scholar.google.com/citations?user=kcD2PeYAAAAJ&hl=en&oi=sra">asked</a> parents how they felt toward other parents and toward child-free people. We also asked child-free people how they felt toward other child-free people and toward parents. </p>
<p>We found that parents strongly favored other parents, but child-free adults didn’t necessarily favor other child-free adults. That is, parents exhibit in-group favoritism, but child-free adults don’t.</p>
<h2>Measuring interpersonal warmth</h2>
<p>A “feeling thermometer” question is one common way to measure how people in one group feel about people in their own group or in other groups. This question asks a person to rate how warmly they feel toward a group on a scale from 0, or very cool, to 100, or very warm. </p>
<p>For example, in 2017 the Pew Research Center <a href="https://www.pewresearch.org/religion/2017/02/15/americans-express-increasingly-warm-feelings-toward-religious-groups/">asked people</a> how they felt about members of their own religion and members of different religions. White evangelicals reported feeling very warm toward other white evangelicals, with an average warmth score of 81. Likewise, atheists reported feeling very warm toward other atheists, with an average warmth score of 82. </p>
<p>This is evidence of in-group favoritism. At the same time, evangelicals reported feeling very cool toward atheists, with an average warmth score of only 33. Likewise, atheists reported feeling very cool toward evangelicals, with an average warmth score of only 29. This is evidence of what’s called “<a href="https://www.igi-global.com/dictionary/out-group-derogation/72245">out-group derogation</a>” – people dislike members of other groups. </p>
<p>We used the same approach to compare parents and child-free adults, and discovered three important patterns.</p>
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<p>First, child-free people feel about the same toward other child-free people as they do toward parents. This was surprising because usually people feel warmer toward members of their own group, but we saw no evidence of in-group favoritism among child-free people.</p>
<p>Second, parents feel much warmer toward other parents than they do toward child-free people. This is a classic example of in-group favoritism – parents like other parents.</p>
<p>Finally, both parents and child-free people feel about the same toward child-free people. This is important because it means that although parents really like other parents, they don’t dislike child-free people. That is, we saw no evidence of out-group derogation.</p>
<h2>Does it really matter?</h2>
<p>Although these results weren’t as extreme as comparisons between <a href="https://www.pewresearch.org/religion/2017/02/15/americans-express-increasingly-warm-feelings-toward-religious-groups/">evangelicals and atheists</a> or <a href="https://www.pewresearch.org/politics/2019/10/10/partisan-antipathy-more-intense-more-personal/">between Republicans and Democrats</a>, they may still matter.</p>
<p><a href="https://journals.plos.org/plosone/article?id=10.1371/journal.pone.0273082">In a related 2022 study</a>, we surveyed 1,000 adults living in rural, suburban and urban areas throughout Michigan, asking them how satisfied they were with their neighborhood. We found that child-free adults <a href="https://www.jstor.org/stable/3599837">were significantly less satisfied</a> with their neighborhoods than both married parents and people who were planning to become parents. </p>
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<p>The strong in-group favoritism among parents might help explain why. Although we did not observe evidence that parents dislike child-free people, their strong preference for other parents could still lead them to inadvertently exclude their child-free neighbors. For example, when it’s time to plan a neighborhood event like a block party, parents may be more inclined to recruit other parents to help. This could lead child-free people feeling out of place in parent and child-focused neighborhoods.</p>
<p>When neighborhoods are focused on parents and children, as <a href="https://www.strongtowns.org/journal/2022/8/2/if-we-build-cities-for-kids-we-build-cities-for-everyone">commenters</a> <a href="https://www.theatlantic.com/family/archive/2022/07/raising-kid-american-city/661506/">increasingly</a> <a href="https://www.theatlantic.com/ideas/archive/2019/07/where-have-all-the-children-gone/594133/">suggest</a> <a href="https://www.city-journal.org/html/childless-city-13577.html">they should be</a>, they are often described as being “family-friendly.” As a result, there are websites offering advice about how to find a family-friendly neighborhood. However, these neighborhoods may be more friendly toward some types of families than others.</p>
<p>With both <a href="https://www.census.gov/library/stories/2022/04/fertility-rates-declined-for-younger-women-increased-for-older-women.html">fertility</a> and <a href="https://www.cdc.gov/nchs/fastats/marriage-divorce.htm">marriage</a> rates declining in the United States, the numbers of child-free people are likely to increase. </p>
<p>As this new family type becomes more common, it’s important to rethink who neighborhoods are for and what it means for a neighborhood to be family-friendly. But it also means rethinking other areas of life too, including workplace <a href="https://www.nytimes.com/2020/08/21/business/should-i-quit-my-job.html">work-life balance policies</a> and <a href="https://www.cbpp.org/research/federal-tax/childless-adults-are-lone-group-taxed-into-poverty">government tax credits</a>.</p><img src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/190406/count.gif" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" />
<p class="fine-print"><em><span>Zachary P. Neal receives funding from the Institute for Public Policy and Social Research at Michigan State University. </span></em></p><p class="fine-print"><em><span>Jennifer Watling Neal receives funding from the Institute for Public Policy and Social Research at Michigan State University. </span></em></p>If parents prefer to associate with other parents, what does that mean for people who have decided against having kids?Zachary P. Neal, Associate Professor of Psychology, Michigan State UniversityJennifer Watling Neal, Professor of Psychology, Michigan State UniversityLicensed as Creative Commons – attribution, no derivatives.tag:theconversation.com,2011:article/1775382022-04-04T01:29:01Z2022-04-04T01:29:01ZAnger, grief and gradual insight in Sian Prior’s memoir Childless<figure><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/455201/original/file-20220330-4833-m2t1zn.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=496&fit=clip" /><figcaption><span class="caption">shutterstock</span> </figcaption></figure><p>There are six of us: high school and university friends I have stayed in close touch with over the years; we are all in our mid-40s now. We are nurses, social workers, educators, writers, massage therapists and political activists. We are past the ideal childbearing years. Three of us had children and the other three did not. </p>
<p>For one it was a choice; for the other two it was circumstance. One of those two who struggled with infertility decided it was meant to be, and she is glad now for the independence it has given her. </p>
<hr>
<p><em>Review: Childless, A Story of Freedom and Longing - Sian Prior (Text Publishing)</em></p>
<hr>
<p>But for the other it has been a source of lasting sorrow. She would have been the best mother of all of us, in the way the universe works; she is the best auntie and gift-giver, listener and game player. I thought of her often while reading Sian Prior’s new memoir, Childless. </p>
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<p>Memoirs allow us to slip into someone else’s skin, to see the world through their eyes for a little while and expand our understanding. Prior uses short chapters which jump through narrative time to tell her story of being childless not by choice but by circumstance. </p>
<p>They are rich with evocative detail and cover a broad spectrum of subjects and spaces. They paint discrete scenes, which build up to a full picture of the grief of not having a child, the anger when Prior sees parents with children who are not cherishing them, the desire to have a child alongside concern about the environmental impact. </p>
<p>Prior does not hide her rage at those who have children whom she judges unworthy of them and at times it made me uncomfortable – I felt guilty. I thought of the times when I was a bad mother: I shouted at my children for not getting their shoes on quickly enough, I looked at my phone when I ought to have been looking at them. No parent is perfect. But I think she is honest, as well, to show us her rage: it’s not sensible, but it is real. And with acceptance of it comes gradual insight as well. </p>
<blockquote>
<p>Through all these years I spent trying to have a child, I thought giving birth would stop me feeling like a failure. Probably it would have just been the beginning of a different way of failing.</p>
</blockquote>
<p>This is Prior’s second memoir; her first, <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/22040760-shy">Shy</a> (2014), examined her own social anxieties and the causes and symptoms of shyness, and the way it had influenced her life. In Childless, she turns the lens on herself again, although there is less external research and more focus on her own experience. </p>
<p>At times, the observations she makes are not backed up by references. “Here in Australia, real children are increasingly depressed, neglected, abused, violent and suicidal,” Prior writes at one point. I believe children are facing greater challenges than they once were, but I’d still like to know the source of such a sweeping statement. And I wonder if abuse, depression and anxiety are also reported more frequently now than at any point in our history. </p>
<p>I thought here of author Mary Karr’s advice to memoir writers from her book <a href="https://www.harpercollins.com/products/the-art-of-memoir-mary-karr">The Art of Memoir</a>: “The goal of a voice is not to speak with objective authority but with subjective curiosity.” That subjective curiosity was sometimes missing in Childless. </p>
<p>In another memoir of childlessness and unsuccessful attempts at IVF, <a href="https://www.penguin.com.au/books/avalanche-9781926428758">Avalanche</a> (2016), Julia Leigh writes about her own experience with infertility but also about the ethics of the IVF clinics that promise something to desperate couples, fudging figures and making a great deal of money out of the desire for a child.</p>
<p>At one point in Avalanche, Leigh asks her doctor how many women her age bring home a baby after fertility treatment and his answer is shocking: 2%. It is a moment that stayed with me, a deeper reflection on the culture we live in, the desperation this industry is tapping into, and the greed of the clinics. Leigh’s curiosity gives us this moment, her desire to dig deeper into why she was unable to have a child.</p>
<p>This is not Prior’s focus, but at the end of Childless I could not say exactly what her focus was. There is some grace found, some acceptance, but there is also blame and many missed opportunities to be involved in other children’s lives. Perhaps it is the messiness of it all that Prior is embracing. There is no neat narrative arc here, this is life and things don’t work that way. </p>
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Read more:
<a href="https://theconversation.com/shyness-isnt-nice-but-shyness-shouldnt-stop-you-28010">Shyness isn't nice, but shyness shouldn't stop you </a>
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<h2>Beyond binaries</h2>
<p>“The problem with true stories is that there are too many different truths,” Prior writes at one point. And the problem with Google is that when she mentions a famous musician/songwriter ex-partner by a pseudonym you find him in seconds. There is a lot of focus on this relationship, as there was in Shy.</p>
<p>One of the complicating factors is that he has children from previous marriages and a vasectomy, so decides not to participate in IVF with her. The memoir opens with one of these scenes: they are together, in a hotel room on his tour, and she is injecting herself with IVF hormones but doing it alone. </p>
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<a href="https://images.theconversation.com/files/455202/original/file-20220330-23-1nn343s.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=1000&fit=clip"><img alt="" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/455202/original/file-20220330-23-1nn343s.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/455202/original/file-20220330-23-1nn343s.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/455202/original/file-20220330-23-1nn343s.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/455202/original/file-20220330-23-1nn343s.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/455202/original/file-20220330-23-1nn343s.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/455202/original/file-20220330-23-1nn343s.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/455202/original/file-20220330-23-1nn343s.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px"></a>
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<span class="caption">In vitro fertilisation of a human female cell. Microscopic view, 3D rendering.</span>
<span class="attribution"><span class="source">Shutterstock</span></span>
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<p>She watches him not watching her, “because this has nothing to do with him”. He does not offer to drive her to medical appointments; he is present but absent. It is complex and fraught. Of course it has something to do with him, in the end, and Prior seems to circle and circle these scenes, seeking out answers. </p>
<p>At one point, she asks, “What choices do I have because I’m not getting what I most wanted.” </p>
<p>I think of my dear childless friend here, who spends weeks every year with her nephews, who was able to help care for her father in his final months. Who will sit with a child and craft for hours. Sew costumes for Halloween. Who has always had the time to listen.</p>
<p>I think it is easy to get distracted now by binaries: the vaccinated and anti-vaxxers, the vegans and the paleos, the parents and the child-free. Memoirs like Prior’s remind us that human experience is far more complex, that there are so many gradations, so much light and shadow. </p>
<p>Our choices are one thing, but we are also made up of our disappointments. Of what we have lost and what we never had the chance to have.</p><img src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/177538/count.gif" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" />
<p class="fine-print"><em><span>Eleanor Limprecht does not work for, consult, own shares in or receive funding from any company or organisation that would benefit from this article, and has disclosed no relevant affiliations beyond their academic appointment.</span></em></p>Rich with evocative detail, an author’s personal account of childlessness has no neat narrative arc, but is touched by grace and acceptance.Eleanor Limprecht, Lecturer, Creative Writing, University of Technology SydneyLicensed as Creative Commons – attribution, no derivatives.tag:theconversation.com,2011:article/1694192021-11-03T19:22:42Z2021-11-03T19:22:42ZNot all women who freeze their eggs want to have children<p>Since the development of ultra-rapid egg freezing <a href="https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/23083924/">around 2013</a>, more and more women worldwide are choosing to undergo the procedure. <a href="https://www.hfea.gov.uk/about-us/publications/research-and-data/fertility-treatment-2018-trends-and-figures/">In the UK</a>, egg freezing has increased by 240% in recent years, from 569 completed cycles in 2013 to 1,933 in 2018. In France, according to my research, around 2,500 women freeze their eggs each year.</p>
<p>Egg freezing gained increased international popularity in 2014, when <a href="https://www.theguardian.com/technology/2014/oct/15/apple-facebook-offer-freeze-eggs-female-employees">Apple and Facebook announced</a> they would cover the procedure for female employees who wanted it. The aim at the time was to allow women to balance motherhood with working life.</p>
<p>Such associations lead to a “careerist” image of women who freeze their eggs in the name of the working life. But most of the research published to date indicates that it is the <a href="https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/30074130/">absence of a partner</a> rather than the pursuit of education or a career that is the main motivation for egg freezing.</p>
<p>Other <a href="https://dora.dmu.ac.uk/bitstream/handle/2086/13109/Baldwin%20%282016%29%20Ice%2c%20Ice%2c%20Baby%20A%20Sociological%20Exploration%20of%20Social%20Egg%20Freezing%20PhD%20Thesis.pdf">studies</a> on the topic suggest that women who freeze their eggs have a strong desire for children. But not all <a href="https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/28077428/">women who have children after egg freezing</a> do so with their frozen ova. Indeed, the return rate is <a href="https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/26688429/">less than 10%</a>.</p>
<p>This raises the question: why do women freeze their eggs, if not to use them later? My <a href="http://www.theses.fr/2021EHES0049">doctoral research</a> in social anthropology and ethnology examined this question.</p>
<h2>The borderline between motherhood and childfree</h2>
<p>I conducted 43 interviews with French women who had frozen their eggs for age-related or medical reasons, or who taken part in egg donation.</p>
<p>Although a majority of the women I spoke to expressed a desire for a child, a third said they felt uncertain about having children, while five said they wanted to remain childfree.</p>
<p>In their testimonies, the women who were unsure or who didn’t want children often placed themselves on the borderline between wanting and not wanting to become mothers. Ilka*, 39, said:</p>
<blockquote>
<p>“I took this step to confront the question of whether I really want children or whether I want them at all costs. So, I don’t fall into the category of ‘I don’t want them at all’ or ‘I want them at all costs’.”</p>
</blockquote>
<p>This was also the case for Rosalinda*, 34, who froze her eggs for medical reasons and also for egg donation:</p>
<blockquote>
<p>“I don’t know if I want a child. Every time I’m asked the question: ‘You don’t want a child now. What about later?’ I don’t want one, full stop. Maybe later, I don’t know.”</p>
</blockquote>
<p>For these women, egg freezing allowed them to confront the question of their “true” desire for a child without losing the possibility of conceiving altogether. Faced with potential infertility associated with ageing, medical treatment or illness, they feared they would no longer be able to give birth, if the desire one day arose. Egg freezing offered them a kind of prolongation of uncertainty until one or other option becomes obvious.</p>
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<a href="https://images.theconversation.com/files/428237/original/file-20211025-19-txy0yk.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=1000&fit=clip"><img alt="A liquid nitrogen bank containing sperm and egg samples" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/428237/original/file-20211025-19-txy0yk.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/428237/original/file-20211025-19-txy0yk.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=401&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/428237/original/file-20211025-19-txy0yk.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=401&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/428237/original/file-20211025-19-txy0yk.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=401&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/428237/original/file-20211025-19-txy0yk.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/428237/original/file-20211025-19-txy0yk.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/428237/original/file-20211025-19-txy0yk.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px"></a>
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<span class="caption">Freezing eggs allows women to prolong the uncertainty around having children.</span>
<span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://www.shutterstock.com/fr/image-photo/liquid-nitrogen-bank-containing-sperm-eggs-348353672">Elena Pavlovich/Shutterstock</a></span>
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<p>The decision not to have children is a difficult and <a href="https://www.cairn.info/revue-population-et-societes-2014-2-page-1.htm">socially marginalised</a> one for women to make, both from a social and personal point of view. They are frequently questioned about their choices. In my study, even these the women who said they definitely did not want children expressed the fear of regretting not having had them in future.</p>
<p>Rita*, 35, explained her decision to freeze her eggs this way:</p>
<blockquote>
<p>“I don’t want to have a child. I am 35 years old. I don’t want to. I’ve never wanted to, but I know that you can change. I tell myself that if one day I change my mind, I will have planned for this option.”</p>
</blockquote>
<p>Tania*, 32, had her eggs frozen after being diagnosed with breast cancer. She said:</p>
<blockquote>
<p>“I have evolved in my relationship with the world and have become increasingly firm and radical about what I want. Not only do I not want a child, I don’t particularly want to be in a couple either.”</p>
</blockquote>
<p>Tania talked about egg freezing as a “well-directed choice” at the time. She said she and her doctors considered it to be the right option after her cancer diagnosis, a moment of psychological distress when making a decision about having children in future would have been difficult.</p>
<h2>All doors open</h2>
<p>My research shows that some women undertake an arduous and psychologically costly journey for a purpose that is not necessarily reproductive. Having frozen eggs places these women not in the “childless” group, but in the “not-yet-mothers” group.</p>
<p>Egg freezing seems to leave women with all doors open. It aims to give them a chance of childbearing in the future. It also allows them to make the choice, temporary or permanent, to be childfree without completely losing the possibility of having children later.</p>
<p>The decision to freeze eggs thus offers a temporary medical response to the uncertainty associated with motherhood in the modern age.</p>
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<p><em>* All names have been changed for privacy reasons.</em></p><img src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/169419/count.gif" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" />
<p class="fine-print"><em><span>Yolinliztli Pérez-Hernández has received funding from the Biomedicine Agency (ABM) and the National Council for Science and Technology (CONACyT, Mexico).</span></em></p>Why do women freeze their eggs? My research shows it’s for a range of reasons, and not always due to a desire to become a mother.Yolinliztli Pérez-Hernández, Docteure en Anthropologie sociale et ethnologie, Institut National d'Études Démographiques (INED)Licensed as Creative Commons – attribution, no derivatives.tag:theconversation.com,2011:article/1421742020-07-19T19:51:32Z2020-07-19T19:51:32ZCOVID-19 could see thousands of women miss out on having kids, creating a demographic disaster for Australia<figure><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/348068/original/file-20200717-19-smeep0.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&rect=8%2C0%2C5431%2C2744&q=45&auto=format&w=496&fit=clip" /><figcaption><span class="caption">
</span> <span class="attribution"><span class="source">www.shutterstock.com</span></span></figcaption></figure><p>COVID-19 lockdowns have led to suggestions there could be a <a href="https://www.sbs.com.au/topics/voices/culture/article/2020/05/19/are-we-headed-towards-baby-boom">“coronial” baby boom</a>. </p>
<p>But while a baby boom as a side effect of the devastating pandemic sounds kind of nice, it is probably too good to be true.</p>
<p>What is more likely is that Australians will delay or forego having children because of coronavirus. This could be personally devastating for people and a demographic disaster for the country. </p>
<h2>What are people really up to?</h2>
<p>The pandemic has seen the birth of terms such as “<a href="https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=COVID%20Thirst">corona thirst</a>”, based on the assumption people are having more sex than usual due to all the extra time at home with nothing much to do. </p>
<p>A <a href="https://www.prnewswire.com/news-releases/lockdown-lust-lovehoney-survey-uncovers-more-than-half-54-of-american-couples-have-become-more-sexually-adventurous-during-the-covid-19-crisis-301082179.html">United States poll</a> released in June signalled a COVID-induced sexual enlightenment, with 54% of surveyed couples reporting they were being more adventurous in bed.</p>
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Read more:
<a href="https://theconversation.com/the-safest-sex-youll-never-have-how-coronavirus-is-changing-online-dating-134382">The safest sex you'll never have: how coronavirus is changing online dating</a>
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<p>The ABC has also recently reported an increase in <a href="https://amp.abc.net.au/article/12189202">sales at adult stores</a> and <a href="https://www.abc.net.au/news/2020-04-08/coronavirus-online-dating-apps-social-distancing-hinge-bumble/12128100">strong demand for dating apps</a>. Meanwhile, last month, Chemist Warehouse pointed to a <a href="https://www.triplem.com.au/story/are-we-about-to-experience-a-coronavirus-caused-baby-boom-162643">30% spike</a> in pregnancy test sales. </p>
<p>But despite all the hype, all signs point to fewer babies being born as a result of COVID-19, not more. For one thing, pregnancy test purchases are more likely to reflect women trying to avoid seeing a doctor in person, rather than a prelude to a boom. </p>
<h2>We do not have the necessary ingredients for a boom</h2>
<p>It takes more than sex (or more sex) to have a baby boom. The <a href="https://www.popcouncil.org/uploads/pdfs/councilarticles/pdr/PDR041Bongaarts.pdf">necessary ingredients</a> include more people partnering and reduced contraception use among couples and we are not seeing evidence of either of these things. </p>
<p>The fact that gathering places like pubs and bars are either closed or restricted is limiting opportunities to meet people and interact in real life. Decreased rates of <a href="https://www.abc.net.au/news/2020-05-20/coronavirus-shutdown-leads-to-apparent-drop-in-stis-in-canberra/12264908">sexually transmitted infections</a> point to a reduction in the formation of new relationships, regardless of the increased use of dating apps. </p>
<figure class="align-center ">
<img alt="" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/347894/original/file-20200716-19-7qd8c4.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/347894/original/file-20200716-19-7qd8c4.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=411&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/347894/original/file-20200716-19-7qd8c4.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=411&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/347894/original/file-20200716-19-7qd8c4.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=411&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/347894/original/file-20200716-19-7qd8c4.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=517&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/347894/original/file-20200716-19-7qd8c4.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=517&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/347894/original/file-20200716-19-7qd8c4.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=517&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px">
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<span class="caption">Social distancing and lockdown has made it difficult for people to meet new partners.</span>
<span class="attribution"><span class="source">James Gourley/AAP</span></span>
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<p>And despite all the talk about adventurous sex, it’s also highly unlikely couples will suddenly decide to increase their intended family size. </p>
<p>For one thing, additional, forced time with loved ones <a href="https://theconversation.com/the-coronavirus-lockdown-could-test-your-relationship-heres-how-to-keep-it-intact-and-even-improve-it-134532">tends to strain</a>, not nurture, relationships. Rising domestic violence rates has also show the pandemic has <a href="https://www.smh.com.au/politics/federal/domestic-violence-on-the-rise-during-pandemic-20200712-p55b8q.html">been unsafe</a> for too many others.</p>
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<em>
<strong>
Read more:
<a href="https://theconversation.com/love-lockdown-the-pandemic-has-put-pressure-on-many-relationships-but-heres-how-to-tell-if-yours-will-survive-135824">Love lockdown: the pandemic has put pressure on many relationships, but here's how to tell if yours will survive</a>
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<p>All the uncertainty and socioeconomic scarcity - including the inability to have <a href="https://www.abc.net.au/news/2020-03-16/coronavirus-shopping-strips-supermarket-shelves-bare/12057924">basic needs, like toilet paper, met</a> and <a href="https://www.theguardian.com/business/2020/jul/16/scott-morrison-says-economy-fighting-back-despite-almost-a-million-unemployed">record unemployment</a> - also means even established, happy couples are likely to postpone having children. </p>
<p>It is important to note that birth rates <a href="https://www.abs.gov.au/ausstats/abs@.nsf/products/451BFD1C377B7908CA2577CF000DEF53?opendocument">dropped dramatically</a> during the Great Depression, from an average of around three births per woman to about two - a substantial decline in terms of magnitude and the time it took to fall. </p>
<p>This offers the most comparable historical event to COVID-19, given the expectation of long-term economic doldrums due to the pandemic. </p>
<h2>Headed for demographic disaster</h2>
<p>Australia’s birth rate of 1.74 births per woman is <a href="https://www.abs.gov.au/AUSSTATS/abs@.nsf/allprimarymainfeatures/F41B99AB234B2074CA25792F00161838?opendocument">already in decline</a>, down from 2.02 in 2008. We can expect COVID-19 to exacerbate this trend.</p>
<p>This is a huge worry. Because, if we fall to or below a birth rate of 1.5, this is well below replacement level and places the future tax base at risk. Simply put, we won’t have enough people to work and pay taxes and fund all the roads, hospitals and welfare initiatives we need to function as a country.</p>
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Read more:
<a href="https://theconversation.com/solving-the-population-problem-through-policy-110970">Solving the 'population problem' through policy</a>
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<p>This is a <a href="https://www.theatlantic.com/ideas/archive/2019/03/underpopulation-problem/585568/">demographic disaster</a>, leading to declining socioeconomic well-being. Future generations will have to cover the bill for far more than we have had to, meaning the Australia they inherit will be worse off. </p>
<p>Even more worryingly, once birth rates fall to around 1.5, they don’t tend to bounce back, because social norms around children and family become ingrained <a href="https://theconversation.com/china-looks-to-relax-two-child-policy-but-it-wont-solve-demographic-problems-102518">even if there are incentives</a> to change.</p>
<p>While countries typically rely on increased immigration to balance <a href="https://theconversation.com/migration-helps-balance-our-ageing-population-we-dont-need-a-moratorium-100030">demographic and workforce needs</a>, this may not be possible in the same way, due to the pandemic.</p>
<h2>The individual impact</h2>
<p>For people who are hoping to have children in the near future, COVID-19 has presented new and no doubt stressful challenges. </p>
<p>Not only is it difficult to meet potential partners, but there have been extra constraints of accessing assisted reproductive technologies. Cancellation of elective surgery during the initial COVID-19 outbreak saw some IVF treatments <a href="https://www.abc.net.au/news/2020-03-27/coronavirus-delays-causing-anguish-for-ivf-patients/12093450">postponed</a>.</p>
<p>Melbourne’s worsening pandemic situation is now likely to cause <a href="https://www.theage.com.au/national/ivf-sector-in-limbo-as-public-hospitals-hit-pause-on-some-elective-surgery-20200716-p55cnl.html">further IVF delays</a>.</p>
<p>Even with the resumption of IVF, prospective parents may have missed their chance to have a family or increase the size of the one they already have.</p>
<h2>Demographic ripples</h2>
<p>Not much is known about childlessness among men in Australia because the census doesn’t include this information and research typically focuses on women.</p>
<p>But we do know that at the <a href="https://www.abs.gov.au/websitedbs/censushome.nsf/home/2016">2016 Census</a>, roughly 30% of women towards the end of their reproductive years aged between 30-44 years reported not having any children. </p>
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<p>
<em>
<strong>
Read more:
<a href="https://theconversation.com/she-wont-be-right-mate-how-the-government-shaped-a-blokey-lockdown-followed-by-a-blokey-recovery-140336">She won't be right, mate: how the government shaped a blokey lockdown followed by a blokey recovery</a>
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<p>Around half of these women would have been <a href="https://amp.smh.com.au/lifestyle/life-and-relationships/it-s-given-me-freedom-three-women-on-being-childless-by-choice-20190814-p52h6v.html">childfree by choice</a>, if the distribution from a 2013 Australian <a href="https://www.researchgate.net/publication/262525032_Why_are_childless_women_childless_Findings_from_an_exploratory_study_of_childless_women_in_Victoria_Australia/fulltext/577f64c208ae69ab8823ccd3/262525032_Why_are_childless_women_childless_Findings_from_an_exploratory_study_of_childless_women_in_Victoria_Australia.pdf?origin=publication_detail">qualitative study</a> was applied. </p>
<p>This roughly translates to around a quarter of a million women being childless against their choice, due to not having a partner or requiring assisted reproductive technology (including same-sex attracted women). </p>
<p>The Household, Income and Labour Dynamics in Australia survey also tells us people don’t have as many children as they plan to at the best of times. The number of children adults intend to have typically <a href="https://theconversation.com/family-size-intentions-the-missing-piece-of-australias-fertility-jigsaw-21069">reduces over time</a> as people realise and experience the barriers confronted by parents trying to juggle paid work, family and life.</p>
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<img alt="" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/347909/original/file-20200716-21-uf5sir.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/347909/original/file-20200716-21-uf5sir.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/347909/original/file-20200716-21-uf5sir.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/347909/original/file-20200716-21-uf5sir.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/347909/original/file-20200716-21-uf5sir.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/347909/original/file-20200716-21-uf5sir.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/347909/original/file-20200716-21-uf5sir.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px">
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<span class="caption">Families may not be able to expand as they planned, due to coronavirus.</span>
<span class="attribution"><span class="source">www.shutterstock.com</span></span>
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<p>All these factors, combined with these raw numbers, conservatively suggests thousands of women will be left stranded in their childbearing years. While some of course may still have children down the track, for others, the window for childbearing will close sooner and more definitively because of COVID-19.</p>
<p>For some existing parents, they will not have as many additional children as they hoped for. </p>
<p>This is a heartbreaking individual outcome, as well as one that will send ripples into the nation’s future demography.</p>
<h2>Demographic recovery</h2>
<p>Post-coronavirus recovery requires comprehensive efforts to build and invest in the demographic capital of the nation, now and into the future. </p>
<p>This means we need to help families achieve their intended family size. The provision of <a href="https://theconversation.com/we-need-a-new-childcare-system-that-encourages-women-to-work-not-punishes-them-for-it-142275">accessible childcare</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/when-the-coronavirus-supplement-stops-jobseeker-needs-to-increase-by-185-a-week-138417">adequate support</a> for the long-term unemployed and financial supports for <a href="https://www.abc.net.au/news/2019-05-05/fertility-adds-ons-a-waste-a-money-according-to-some-experts/11004434?nw=0">people accessing IVF</a> are just starters. </p>
<p>It’s going to be a rough road ahead. Sadly, for many Australians, it will be marked by significant personal heartache, with the ripple effects felt at a population level.</p><img src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/142174/count.gif" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" />
<p class="fine-print"><em><span>Liz Allen is a council member of the Australian Population Association and author of The Future Of Us.</span></em></p>Despite the hype about a “coronial” baby boom, the pandemic is likely to see many Australians delay or not have children at all.Liz Allen, Demographer, ANU Centre for Social Research and Methods, Australian National UniversityLicensed as Creative Commons – attribution, no derivatives.tag:theconversation.com,2011:article/1004832018-07-25T04:43:01Z2018-07-25T04:43:01ZInfertility through the ages, and how IVF helped change the way we think about it – podcast<figure><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/229070/original/file-20180724-194124-18sjixp.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=496&fit=clip" /><figcaption><span class="caption">
</span> <span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://www.shutterstock.com/home">from www.shutterstock.com</a></span></figcaption></figure><p>To all outward appearances, Louise Brown looked exactly the same as thousands of other babies when her blinking, slightly quizzical gaze met newspaper readers on the morning of July 25, 1978. But as the first child born using the technique of in-vitro fertilisation (IVF), she was utterly unique in the history of humankind.</p>
<p>This audio version of a long read article written by Tracey Loughran, Reader in History at the University of Essex, tracks the history of infertility and how the experience of involuntary childlessness has changed. It’s read by Gemma Ware.</p>
<iframe src="https://player.acast.com/5e29c8205aa745a456af58c8/episodes/5e29c8365aa745a456af58ca?theme=default&cover=1&latest=1" frameborder="0" width="100%" height="110px" allow="autoplay"></iframe>
<p>You can read the <a href="https://theconversation.com/infertility-through-the-ages-and-how-ivf-changed-the-way-we-think-about-it-87128">text version of the article here</a>.</p>
<p><em>The music in this podcast is <a href="http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Lee_Rosevere/Music_for_Podcasts_4/Lee_Rosevere_-_Music_for_Podcasts_4_-_06_Night_Caves">Night Caves</a>, by Lee Rosevere from the Free Music Archive. A big thanks to City University London’s Department of Journalism for letting us use their studios to record. You can subscribe to this podcast <a href="https://itunes.apple.com/au/podcast/in-depth-out-loud/id1316764355?mt=2">here</a>.</em></p><img src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/100483/count.gif" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" />
<p class="fine-print"><em><span>Tracey Loughran receives funding from the British Academy and the Wellcome Trust. </span></em></p>An audio version of a long read article on the history of infertility, 40 years after the first baby was born via IVF.Tracey Loughran, Reader in History and Deputy Dean of Humanities (Research), University of EssexLicensed as Creative Commons – attribution, no derivatives.tag:theconversation.com,2011:article/580682016-05-24T20:09:33Z2016-05-24T20:09:33ZChild-free: why women who choose not to have kids are given such a hard time<figure><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/123335/original/image-20160520-16754-j4qd5a.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=496&fit=clip" /><figcaption><span class="caption">More than 7% of Western women choose not to have children.</span> <span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://www.flickr.com/photos/futureshape/6823153479/">Alexander Baxevanis/FLickr</a>, <a class="license" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/">CC BY</a></span></figcaption></figure><p><em>Our politicians talk a lot about “families”, but what do they really mean when they use this term? What does a modern Australian family look like and how does it compare with ten, 20 or even 30 years ago?</em></p>
<p><em>In this <a href="https://theconversation.com/au/topics/changing-families">ten-part series</a>, we examine some major changes in family and relationships, and how that might in turn reshape law, policy and our idea of ourselves.</em></p>
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<p>Selfish, damaged, cold-hearted, shallow, overeducated and greedy. Women who choose not to have children are often labelled in these ways by everyone from <a href="http://www.theguardian.com/world/2015/feb/11/pope-francis-the-choice-to-not-have-children-is-selfish">the Pope</a> to <a href="http://www.marieclaire.com/career-advice/tips/a7755/single-girls-second-shift/">their co-workers</a>.</p>
<p>Australian women <a href="http://www.cogitatiopress.com/ojs/index.php/socialinclusion/article/view/489">experience marked social exclusion</a> if they choose to remain childless – and it’s the choice part of the equation that leads to their deviant status. While all childless women experience some exclusion, women who have rejected the traditional ideal of motherhood are at the greatest risk of social disconnection. It is the very act of making a conscious and public choice to reject the role of mother that is overtly or tacitly criticised.</p>
<p>The so-called lifestyle pages are full of articles by women <a href="http://www.mamamia.com.au/being-single-in-your-30s/">trying to redress and reclaim the dialogue</a> around the choice not to have children. These narratives and other <a href="http://www.nytimes.com/2015/04/12/books/review/selfish-shallow-and-self-absorbed-sixteen-writers-on-the-decision-not-to-have-kids.html?_r=0">contemporary writings on the choice to remain child-free</a> parallel the research and challenge the dominant story that women who choose not to have children hate little people, want to save money and can’t give up their holidays. </p>
<p>The research evidence tells a different tale. It’s not children childless women hate, or even <a href="https://aifs.gov.au/publications/guide-calculating-costs-children/costs-children-australian-households">the terrible cost of having children</a>, the lack of available childcare, parental leave or the loss of <a href="https://newmatilda.com/2015/10/30/flexibility-wont-stop-women-retiring-in-poverty/">superannuation</a> that’s taking up the lion’s share of their decision. Instead, it’s the <a href="http://dro.deakin.edu.au/eserv/DU:30057292/graham-whyarechildless-2013.pdf">degraded state and overinflated expectations</a> of motherhood most are not keen on. And, of course, some women simply want a different kind of life.</p>
<p>Several recent studies point to an <a href="https://www.researchgate.net/profile/Kyung_Hee_Lee4/publication/282571676_Journeys_to_remain_childless_A_grounded_theory_examination_of_decision-making_processes_among_voluntarily_childless_couples/links/5612561008aec422d1174b7b.pdf">increased social acceptance</a> of women who choose to remain child-free in societies with greater gender parity. In other words, the larger the space women can occupy, the more opportunity there is for a variety of life choices for women. In places where women have greater power, there is less policing of the role of mother and room for a more inclusive view of how to be a woman.</p>
<p>Women who are childless by choice often mother in other ways, ways that can go unrecognised by all but those who benefit from them. They step mother, <a href="http://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0003347287802348">allomother</a> (where women other than the mother help take care of the child), actively aunt or foster. Anyone who has ever shared the burdensome role of parent or been mothered by such a voluntary mother will understand how desperately necessary this kind of mothering is.</p>
<p>The fascinating story of voluntary childlessness is really no different from the story of all women who have fought to gain a measure of control over their fertility. While the reasons women choose not to have children are in some ways complex, <a href="https://www.spi.ox.ac.uk/fileadmin/documents/PDF/Childlessness_-_Number_5.pdf">more than 7% of Western women</a> are making this choice. This proportion has increased significantly over the past 30 years. And more women are making this decision as their ability to do so with less censure increases. </p>
<p>But not all women are able to choose. <a href="http://www.mpts101.org/docs/SinghSFP-UnintendedPregnancy.pdf">Just over 40% of pregnancies worldwide are unplanned</a> and many of those are also unwanted. There are a <a href="http://www.childrenbychoice.org.au/info-a-resources/facts-and-figures/unplanned-pregnancy-profiles-of-abortion-adoption-and-parenting">myriad of reasons</a> for this staggering number, including access and adequacy of contraception, domestic violence, social pressure and misinformation. The choice to limit fertility is very much still an ideal rather than a reality for many women. </p>
<p>If you step back from the picture painted by the research and personal dialogue about women’s voluntary childlessness, what stands out is how hard it still is for women to be truly free to make choices about whether or not to have children. The rhetoric around childlessness, like the often degraded conversations about abortion, older mothers, <a href="https://www.researchgate.net/profile/Paul_Morrison4/publication/276369778_You_don't_know_half_the_story_deepening_the_dialogue_with_young_mothers_in_Australia/links/55e3e3aa08aede0b5733d14a.pdf">young mothers</a>, lesbian mothers, single mothers (the list goes on), continues to pit woman against woman in a effort to keep the definition of woman as narrow as possible. </p>
<p>The experiences of women who choose not to have children play a key part in understanding how our choices as women have the power to define who we are. And our degree of freedom to make those choices tells us something about who we are allowed to be. Women who use their freedom of choice to not have children are among those who stretch the idea of womanhood to its furthest edges, challenging the age-old assumption that woman and mother are synonymous and spotlighting the current high cost of mothering.</p>
<p><em>Author Q&A: Zoë Krupka will be answering your questions today (24 May) from 3pm to 4pm AEST.</em></p><img src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/58068/count.gif" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" />
<p class="fine-print"><em><span>Zoë Krupka does not work for, consult, own shares in or receive funding from any company or organisation that would benefit from this article, and has disclosed no relevant affiliations beyond their academic appointment.</span></em></p>Women who publicly state their desire never to be mothers in the traditional sense challenge the idea that woman and mother are synonymous.Zoë Krupka, PhD Student, Faculty of Health Sciences, La Trobe UniversityLicensed as Creative Commons – attribution, no derivatives.tag:theconversation.com,2011:article/467002015-09-09T10:19:29Z2015-09-09T10:19:29ZTo see why attitudes on having children have changed, look at…New Yorker cartoons?<figure><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/93812/original/image-20150903-8793-izl5oc.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=496&fit=clip" /><figcaption><span class="caption">Researchers pored through 70,439 New Yorker cartoons. </span> <span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://www.flickr.com/photos/amalee/3278839935/in/photolist-5ZJUT2-5pEUSQ-5VDAig-561kiC-dbJ7R3-55W9eB-paBcbw-561kQS-8ZQzFz-8ZTFTJ-561kBw-8ZQBii-8ZTGsN-8ZTHoW-nZjCxY-nGVBrX-oFrUUV-vmwzjh-55W8Na-8ZTED1-8ZTEJd-8ZQBYc-8ZTGFN-8ZTHuL-8ZQC7H-8ZTH61-8ZQz52-8ZTHeC-8ZQzMg-8ZQASD-8ZQB8t-6gyrys-8AUQMt-8AXZiQ-nXnSLq-6tyWv8-8y83jG-dbJ69n-9v5b2C-7Wpcfu-6zCg9C-4Mi9nJ-6cNUD9-561kKQ-55W954-fcryza-5ZANNA-56aBdr-5Cm8dY-561kME">amy bernier/flickr</a>, <a class="license" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-nd/4.0/">CC BY-NC-ND</a></span></figcaption></figure><p>In the 1980s, sociologist Viviana Zelizer <a href="http://press.princeton.edu/titles/5452.html">proclaimed</a> that we were living in the age of the “priceless” child. </p>
<p>She noted that in the late 19th century, children were valued primarily for their economic contributions to their families, and to society at large. But by the early 20th century – and in the wake of child labor laws and declining rates of child mortality – the value of children started to be defined in sentimental terms. </p>
<p>Today, in an era of obsessive child-proofing and Amber Alerts and princess-themed birthday parties, the idea of the priceless child is easy to grasp. It can also be seen in the constant hovering of “helicopter” parents, ready to swoop in at a moment’s notice to protect their little darlings from harm, even minor inconvenience. </p>
<p>Yet popular culture also abounds with more complex – even overtly negative – portrayals of children and childrearing. We might think of the little terrors depicted in television shows like Toddlers and Tiaras and Super Nanny. Then there are the foul-mouthed pranksters of Southpark and The Simpsons. </p>
<p>Meanwhile, <a href="http://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s10826-013-9716-3">scholars</a>, <a href="http://us.macmillan.com/howtoraiseanadult/julielythcotthaims">educators</a>, and <a href="http://content.time.com/time/magazine/article/0,9171,1940697,00.html">journalists</a> have all raised concerns about the consequences of constant hovering, both for parents’ stress levels and for the fate of their overly-doted-on kids.</p>
<p>These more complex depictions of children and childrearing led us to our research questions. </p>
<p>First: Are contemporary social attitudes toward children and childrearing as uniformly positive as scholars like Viviana Zelizer suggest? Or are they more varied? </p>
<p>And second: Have changes in social attitudes toward children and childrearing followed the linear and positive trajectory that Zelizer describes, or have they evolved in more complex ways? To answer these questions, we decided to do a content analysis of New Yorker cartoons. </p>
<p>You might wonder: why, of all the mediums to study, would we choose to analyze the cartoons of a literary magazine? </p>
<p>Well, for one, cartoons are great for <a href="http://poq.oxfordjournals.org/content/53/4/482.short">tapping into taboo attitudes</a> – like negative perceptions of children and childrearing – that might not be revealed in surveys. And second, educated elites – like <a href="http://xroads.virginia.edu/%7Eug02/newyorker/audience.html">those who read the New Yorker</a> – are <a href="http://scholar.harvard.edu/files/patterson/files/cricket_asr_final.pdf">often at the forefront of trends</a>. </p>
<p>We started with <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Complete-Cartoons-Yorker-Robert-Mankoff/dp/1579126200">The Complete Cartoons of the New Yorker</a>, which contains all of the cartoons published in the magazine from 1925-2006 (70,439 cartoons). We then used the cartoon index to identify all the images depicting or relating to children or childrearing (6,199 cartoons). Next, we coded each image’s attitude toward children and childrearing. </p>
<p>This involved two steps. First, we identified which cartoons took a “critical” stance on children or childrearing and which did not. Then we identified the predominant theme of each cartoon. </p>
<p>While there were many themes represented, we grouped the cartoons into seven broad categories: “Children are <a href="https://www.cartoonbank.com/search/-/search/results?_listenersearchresults_WAR_searchportlet_struts.portlet.action=%2Fview%2FshowDetail&_listenersearchresults_WAR_searchportlet_pageNumber=2&_listenersearchresults_WAR_searchportlet_search=feature%3Acncartoons+AND+family+AND+children&_listenersearchresults_WAR_searchportlet_match=cartoonbank&_listenersearchresults_WAR_searchportlet_breadCrumb=Children&_listenersearchresults_WAR_searchportlet_tagId=cncartoons024522">Beneficial to Parents</a>,” “Children are <a href="https://www.cartoonbank.com/search/-/search/results?p_p_state=pop_up&_listenersearchresults_WAR_searchportlet_struts.portlet.action=%2Fview%2FshowDetail&_listenersearchresults_WAR_searchportlet_pageNumber=2&_listenersearchresults_WAR_searchportlet_search=feature%3Acncartoons+AND+family+AND+children&_listenersearchresults_WAR_searchportlet_match=cartoonbank&_listenersearchresults_WAR_searchportlet_breadCrumb=Children&_listenersearchresults_WAR_searchportlet_tagId=cncartoons025832">Costly to Parents</a>,” “<a href="https://www.cartoonbank.com/search/-/search/results?p_p_state=pop_up&_listenersearchresults_WAR_searchportlet_struts.portlet.action=%2Fview%2FshowDetail&_listenersearchresults_WAR_searchportlet_pageNumber=2&_listenersearchresults_WAR_searchportlet_search=feature%3Acncartoons+AND+family+AND+children&_listenersearchresults_WAR_searchportlet_match=cartoonbank&_listenersearchresults_WAR_searchportlet_breadCrumb=Children&_listenersearchresults_WAR_searchportlet_tagId=cncartoons025793">Bad Parents</a>,” “<a href="https://www.cartoonbank.com/search/-/search/results?p_p_state=pop_up&_listenersearchresults_WAR_searchportlet_struts.portlet.action=%2Fview%2FshowDetail&_listenersearchresults_WAR_searchportlet_pageNumber=1&_listenersearchresults_WAR_searchportlet_search=father+reading&_listenersearchresults_WAR_searchportlet_match=a&_listenersearchresults_WAR_searchportlet_sort=d&_listenersearchresults_WAR_searchportlet_searchFeatures=cncartoons&_listenersearchresults_WAR_searchportlet_tagId=cncartoons016838">Good Parents</a>,” “Children Have a <a href="https://www.cartoonbank.com/search/-/search/results?_listenersearchresults_WAR_searchportlet_struts.portlet.action=%2Fview%2FshowDetail&_listenersearchresults_WAR_searchportlet_pageNumber=1&_listenersearchresults_WAR_searchportlet_search=scout&_listenersearchresults_WAR_searchportlet_match=a&_listenersearchresults_WAR_searchportlet_sort=d&_listenersearchresults_WAR_searchportlet_searchFeatures=cncartoons&_listenersearchresults_WAR_searchportlet_tagId=cncartoons012677">Positive Impact</a> on Society,” “Children Have a <a href="https://www.cartoonbank.com/search/-/search/results?_listenersearchresults_WAR_searchportlet_struts.portlet.action=%2Fview%2FshowDetail&_listenersearchresults_WAR_searchportlet_pageNumber=2&_listenersearchresults_WAR_searchportlet_search=feature%3Acncartoons+AND+family+AND+children&_listenersearchresults_WAR_searchportlet_match=cartoonbank&_listenersearchresults_WAR_searchportlet_breadCrumb=Children&_listenersearchresults_WAR_searchportlet_tagId=cncartoons025183">Negative Impact</a> on Society” and “Children are <a href="https://www.cartoonbank.com/search/-/search/results?p_p_state=pop_up&_listenersearchresults_WAR_searchportlet_struts.portlet.action=%2Fview%2FshowDetail&_listenersearchresults_WAR_searchportlet_pageNumber=1&_listenersearchresults_WAR_searchportlet_search=feature%3Acncartoons+AND+family+AND+children&_listenersearchresults_WAR_searchportlet_match=cartoonbank&_listenersearchresults_WAR_searchportlet_breadCrumb=Children&_listenersearchresults_WAR_searchportlet_tagId=cncartoons029906">Normal or Natural</a>.” After coding the images, we completed a series of statistical analyses aimed at describing patterns in social attitudes over time. </p>
<figure class="align-right zoomable">
<a href="https://images.theconversation.com/files/93961/original/image-20150904-14650-qglh5d.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=1000&fit=clip"><img alt="" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/93961/original/image-20150904-14650-qglh5d.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=237&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/93961/original/image-20150904-14650-qglh5d.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=759&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/93961/original/image-20150904-14650-qglh5d.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=759&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/93961/original/image-20150904-14650-qglh5d.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=759&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/93961/original/image-20150904-14650-qglh5d.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=954&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/93961/original/image-20150904-14650-qglh5d.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=954&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/93961/original/image-20150904-14650-qglh5d.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=954&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px"></a>
<figcaption>
<span class="caption">Some New Yorker cartoons depict children as mischievous.</span>
<span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://www.flickr.com/photos/x1brett/15253693741/in/photolist-peVaHF-55W96Z-vBKWM-pyNsuT-3ERtWW-air25N-5SDu1L-57wrFo-5NdLft-q7XMRH-3yA9PF-e4jbEo-dCwVAk-9G6Dkm-cVSj8-de3s1R-mhY6F-7vRfpG-ago6Nu-7cEzZe-dybGQo-8UJiA8-aoetKD-oBYHuf-59SEAg-nKfxJt-anQYMZ-8qv64H-9Ci8yy-sJQnMK-dnghr5-7THZ1U-84XYtb-vmwzjh-54Dn4J-8paY8R-nSZmkb-5FB4Cb-9cyP8Y-n7usma-b2bJic-fAiW8h-8f8qKS-anQYKn-Txv4t-n7eU8b-pKmuX1-epFDY1-qp7Y7M-4gdRzj">brett jordan/flickr</a>, <a class="license" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/">CC BY</a></span>
</figcaption>
</figure>
<p>Overall, we found that attitudes toward children and childrearing are more complex and more varied than what we might expect from previous research, and 43% of the cartoons in our sample took a critical stance. Those critical cartoons, in turn, did not become less common over time. In fact, our statistical tests revealed a curvilinear pattern, with <a href="https://www.cartoonbank.com/search/-/search/results?p_p_state=pop_up&_listenersearchresults_WAR_searchportlet_struts.portlet.action=%2Fview%2FshowDetail&_listenersearchresults_WAR_searchportlet_pageNumber=1&_listenersearchresults_WAR_searchportlet_search=feature%3Acncartoons+AND+family+AND+children&_listenersearchresults_WAR_searchportlet_match=cartoonbank&_listenersearchresults_WAR_searchportlet_breadCrumb=Children&_listenersearchresults_WAR_searchportlet_tagId=cncartoons030438">critical attitudes</a> toward children and childrearing being most common at the tail ends of our sample – 1925-1940 and 1990-2006. </p>
<p>These patterns are surprising in that they go against previously held assumptions that we are living in the age of the “priceless” child. </p>
<p><a href="https://www.cartoonbank.com/search/-/search/results?p_p_state=pop_up&_listenersearchresults_WAR_searchportlet_struts.portlet.action=%2Fview%2FshowDetail&_listenersearchresults_WAR_searchportlet_pageNumber=1&_listenersearchresults_WAR_searchportlet_search=feature%3Acncartoons+AND+family+AND+parents&_listenersearchresults_WAR_searchportlet_match=cartoonbank&_listenersearchresults_WAR_searchportlet_breadCrumb=Parents&_listenersearchresults_WAR_searchportlet_tagId=cncartoons030937">Positive portrayals</a> of children and childrearing, on the other hand, were more common in the middle years of our sample, and particularly in the 1950s and 1980s. </p>
<p>So why are these patterns important? We argue that understanding shifting social attitudes toward children and childrearing can help us to better understand other broad social trends. </p>
<p>These include changing fertility rates (which can be tied to family decisions about whether to have children and how many to have) and changing social policies – in other words, societal decisions about who deserves support and why. </p>
<p>During the 2000s, for example, there was an increase in the number of cartoons highlighting the high costs that children pose to parents. This included economic costs, as well as costs in terms of parents’ freedom and flexibility. Then there’s the negative impact they have on society as a whole, either through the “mischievous” – even criminal – tendencies of children. </p>
<p>Such critical attitudes, in turn, may help to explain why <a href="http://www.cdc.gov/nchs/data/databriefs/db175.htm">fertility rates have declined</a> and why so many adults are opting to <a href="http://www.pewsocialtrends.org/2015/05/07/childlessness/">forgo parenthood altogether</a>.</p>
<p>So while a New Yorker cartoon might elicit a quick chuckle for a reader taking a break from 20,000 word article, the things we find funny can also tell us a lot about our cultural moment, our attitudes and the collective decisions we make.</p><img src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/46700/count.gif" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" />
<p class="fine-print"><em><span>The authors do not work for, consult, own shares in or receive funding from any company or organization that would benefit from this article, and have disclosed no relevant affiliations beyond their academic appointment.</span></em></p>Some might say we’re in the age of the ‘priceless’ child, but The New Yorker certainly doesn’t think so.Jessica Calarco, Assistant Professor of Sociology, Indiana UniversityJaclyn Tabor, PhD Candidate in Sociology, Indiana UniversityLicensed as Creative Commons – attribution, no derivatives.tag:theconversation.com,2011:article/377432015-05-21T20:04:19Z2015-05-21T20:04:19ZPeople who don’t want kids deserve respect for their choice<figure><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/82161/original/image-20150519-25432-f6c9hs.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=496&fit=clip" /><figcaption><span class="caption">There's a sense that people who want to be child-free are somehow draft-dodging the duty of parenthood – we’ve done it and suffered, so why haven’t you?</span> <span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://www.flickr.com/photos/junglearctic/3629313995">Hanna Nikkanen/Flickr</a>, <a class="license" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/4.0/">CC BY-NC-SA</a></span></figcaption></figure><p>A conversation about the merits or otherwise of choosing not to have kids has been simmering away since Pope Francis designated people who have made the choice as “<a href="http://www.theguardian.com/world/2015/feb/11/pope-francis-the-choice-to-not-have-children-is-selfish">selfish</a>” earlier this year. </p>
<p>A couple of months after his comments, <a href="http://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2015/apr/08/why-justify-decision-child-free-culture-war-parenting">the issue was being discussed</a> because of the film <a href="http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1791682/">While We’re Young</a> and the US book <a href="http://www.brainpickings.org/2015/05/11/selfish-shallow-and-self-absorbed-meghan-daum/">Selfish, Shallow and Self-Absorbed</a>. And now, the <a href="http://www.abc.net.au/radionational/programs/lifematters/childless-or-child-free-listeners-speak-about-life-without-kids/6454548?utm_content=bufferfa378&utm_medium=social&utm_source=twitter.com&utm_campaign=buffer">Australian media appears to be visiting</a> this perennially interesting issue. </p>
<p>There’s good reason for the enduring interest in people who choose not to breed. Societies overwhelmingly endorse reproduction; children grow up being told they’ll become parents one day, parents expect to become grandparents, and having children is universally endorsed as a good thing for all. </p>
<p>But even though we tend to expect everyone to reproduce, the number of childless people in <a href="http://www.oecd.org/els/family/database.htm">most developed countries</a> is increasing. Childlessness has steadily grown in all OECD countries but Australia has the <a href="http://www.familiesandsocieties.eu/wp-content/uploads/2015/03/WP33MiettinenEtAl2015.pdf">second-highest rate of people not having children</a>, after Italy. <a href="http://www.abs.gov.au/AUSSTATS/abs@.nsf/Lookup/4102.0Main+Features10Dec+2010">Australian census data show</a> the number of childless women in the 40 to 49 age group increased from just 9% in 1976 to 11% in 1996 and 14% in 2006. </p>
<p><a href="http://journals.cambridge.org/action/displayAbstract?fromPage=online&aid=1633472">Research I did for my doctoral thesis</a> on voluntary childlessness in the United Kingdom suggested a variety of motives among people who choose to be childless. But some of the people I spoke to said many people were hostile to their decision not to have children and characterised them as selfish and even “unnatural”. Although I did that work about 30 years ago, current debates about the issue show the same holds today. </p>
<h2>To have or have not</h2>
<p>People often have strong reasons for why they don’t have children; they’ve often made the decision more thoughtfully than people who do choose to reproduce. Some of the people I spoke to made an idealistic decision based on their concern for the environment and were typically hoping to contribute to zero population growth. Others were hedonistic and preferred their Harley Davidson or other hobbies to children. </p>
<p>And some had practical reasons, such as a desire to not reproduce the depression that seemed recurrent in their family or their intention to pursue a career wholeheartedly rather than juggling parenting and a job. Some women feared not being supported in child rearing by their partner.</p>
<p>Emotional reasons drove some who noted they didn’t have maternal or paternal feelings, and had never felt any drive or desire to have children. All these reasons resonate today, and the decision not to reproduce is still regarded with hostility by some. </p>
<figure class="align-center ">
<img alt="" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/82159/original/image-20150519-25422-1xm64do.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/82159/original/image-20150519-25422-1xm64do.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=399&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/82159/original/image-20150519-25422-1xm64do.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=399&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/82159/original/image-20150519-25422-1xm64do.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=399&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/82159/original/image-20150519-25422-1xm64do.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=501&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/82159/original/image-20150519-25422-1xm64do.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=501&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/82159/original/image-20150519-25422-1xm64do.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=501&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px">
<figcaption>
<span class="caption">Children grow up being told they’ll become parents one day.</span>
<span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://www.flickr.com/photos/niconelson/6654919703/">Nico Nelson/Flickr</a>, <a class="license" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/">CC BY</a></span>
</figcaption>
</figure>
<p>Responses to childlessness are complex because the group includes people who are physically unable to have children even though they want them, and those who passively slid into childlessness with the passage of time, as well as people who have consciously chosen not to reproduce. </p>
<p>Unwanted childlessness often elicits pity and sympathy because the child-rearing experience is seen to be so rewarding that not to experience it becomes abnormal or unfortunate. But when people choose to be childless, this pity often tips over into approbation about how strange it is to not want the experience. </p>
<p>In part, there’s a sense that people who want to be child-free are somehow draft-dodging the duty of parenthood; we’ve done it and suffered, so why haven’t you? Or, all animals have to reproduce, so how come you haven’t done your bit for the species? </p>
<h2>Something not quite right</h2>
<p>Then there’s the perception that anyone who doesn’t want to have children must in some way be lacking. Behind this lies the idea that it’s natural and healthy to want to have children, and not wanting them suggests either selfishness or a psychological problem. Of course, childfree people may be selfish or have psychological problems, but many parents are too. </p>
<p>Another common perception is that people will regret their decision not to have children when they are old and have no one to help them. Although there isn’t much research on this topic, <a href="http://sciencenordic.com/older-people-just-happy-without-children">a Norwegian survey</a> of 5,500 people between the ages of 40 and 80 found no evidence that childless adults have reduced well-being compared to people with children.</p>
<p>And US studies show that while childlessness <a href="http://parc.pop.upenn.edu/sites/parc.pop.upenn.edu/files/parc/PARCwps96-02.pdf">does not increase loneliness and depression</a> as such, older, divorced childless men are <a href="http://psychsocgerontology.oxfordjournals.org/content/56/5/S311.short">more likely to experience</a> them. </p>
<p>But living in a society that puts often insidious and not very subtle pressure on people to have children can make those who choose not to feel deviant and marginalised from mainstream society. When the answer to the still-ubiquitous question of how many children you have is none, the awkward silence or failure to further explore this answer that follows creates a social exclusion that childfree people have to learn to live with. </p>
<p>Such social exclusion <a href="http://bjp.rcpsych.org/content/191/6/477">may well lead to mental health issues</a> but that’s difficult to prove empirically. The childless are not a homogeneous group and <a href="http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3159916/#R51">US research suggests</a> negative attitudes towards childlessness are associated with higher levels of loneliness and depression.</p>
<p>People who choose to remain child-free have a range of motivations including some with a very well-honed social and environmental concern. Accepting all fertility choices will help us create a more inclusive and mentally healthy society.</p><img src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/37743/count.gif" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" />
<p class="fine-print"><em><span>Fran Baum does not work for, consult, own shares in or receive funding from any company or organisation that would benefit from this article, and has disclosed no relevant affiliations beyond their academic appointment.</span></em></p>Societies overwhelmingly endorse reproduction, but the pressure this places on people who don’t want to have kids may be putting their health at risk.Fran Baum, Matthew Flinders Distinguished Professor, Foundation Director, Southgate Institute for Health, Society & Equity, Flinders UniversityLicensed as Creative Commons – attribution, no derivatives.