tag:theconversation.com,2011:/ca/topics/perfectionism-21258/articlesPerfectionism – The Conversation2024-03-18T19:21:49Ztag:theconversation.com,2011:article/2228042024-03-18T19:21:49Z2024-03-18T19:21:49Z‘I wanted to stop … but I also wanted to pull’. 1 in 50 people have trichotillomania – a new memoir unpacks compulsive hair-pulling<figure><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/581450/original/file-20240312-22-juqvok.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&rect=0%2C0%2C3994%2C3982&q=45&auto=format&w=496&fit=clip" /><figcaption><span class="caption">
</span> <span class="attribution"><span class="source">The Conversation/Shutterstock</span></span></figcaption></figure><p>Towards the end of Adele Dumont’s affecting memoir <a href="https://scribepublications.com.au/books-authors/books/the-pulling-9781922585912">The Pulling</a>, she thanks the reader, her “stranger”, for the opportunity to unburden herself of her compulsion of 17 years (and since the age of 17): to pull out strands of her hair, regularly and frequently. As a result, a large section of her scalp would eventually lay bare, yet cleverly concealed from others. </p>
<p>Hair-pulling, or <a href="https://theconversation.com/pulling-out-your-hair-in-frustration-what-you-need-to-know-about-trichotillomania-45228">trichotillomania</a>, does not come up much in public conversation. While terms such as ADHD, OCD or PTSD have almost passed into common parlance, hair-pulling is not well known, despite, as the author claims, <a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC9063575/.">affecting 2% of the population</a> – an incidence greater than that of <a href="https://www.who.int/news-room/fact-sheets/detail/schizophrenia">schizophrenia (0.32%)</a> or <a href="https://library.neura.edu.au/bipolar-disorder/epidemiology-bipolar-disorder/prevalence-epidemiology-bipolar-disorder/worldwide-4/index.html">bipolar disorder</a> (around 1% over a lifetime). </p>
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Read more:
<a href="https://theconversation.com/pulling-out-your-hair-in-frustration-what-you-need-to-know-about-trichotillomania-45228">Pulling out your hair in frustration? What you need to know about trichotillomania</a>
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<p>But the secrecy and shame that surrounds trichotillomania mean it is very much a hidden disorder, poorly understood by the general population. <em>Pull your hair out – why don’t you just stop?</em> </p>
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<p><em>Review: The Pulling – Adele Dumont (Scribe)</em></p>
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<p>Dumont’s memoir is structured around themes (“inside an episode”, “shame”, “other people”) and starts with an account of her childhood and family upbringing. The quality of the writing and the tender voice quickly drew me into the mystery of this baffling disorder. </p>
<p>Reading it, I was alert for evidence of trauma or abuse, anything that might explain Dumont’s “eventual unravelling”. There are very few clues from childhood. </p>
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<a href="https://images.theconversation.com/files/581470/original/file-20240313-18-g2eevp.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=1000&fit=clip"><img alt="" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/581470/original/file-20240313-18-g2eevp.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/581470/original/file-20240313-18-g2eevp.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/581470/original/file-20240313-18-g2eevp.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/581470/original/file-20240313-18-g2eevp.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/581470/original/file-20240313-18-g2eevp.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/581470/original/file-20240313-18-g2eevp.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/581470/original/file-20240313-18-g2eevp.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px"></a>
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<span class="caption">Adele Dumont’s affecting memoir investigates her trichotillomania, or compulsive hair-pulling.</span>
<span class="attribution"><span class="source">Scribe</span></span>
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<h2>Sensing something amiss</h2>
<p>Her parents met while fruit-picking in far-north Queensland; her father was a backpacker from France. Together they spent 15 years moving between orchards and later, with their two daughters, from farm to farm across rural Australia. The family lived in tents and later a caravan, and the young Adele remembers a solitary childhood: lived in nature, but never far from her parents. </p>
<p>The family moved to the outskirts of Sydney for the girls to attend school. In the holidays or on weekends, the young Adele remembers her father lifting her gently from sleep to her bed in the Kombi, waking up in orchards. </p>
<p>Her parents stayed together, despite some “unease in the marriage”. She adored her self-taught French bookworm father, his devotion to her and younger sister (“E”), his capacity to accept others “as they were”. Dumont presents her mother as a psychologically complex character, a little scary. “Mama” was at pains to provide materially for her daughters, but not present in a way that enabled them to relax in their own home.</p>
<p>Mama was devoted to her daughters and they led a frugal (“elemental”) life where nothing was ever wasted. Dumont uses the example of her mother’s tendency to hoard, and her own tendency to hoard secrets, to explain her eventual writing of “this silence and all this story” — lest it be wasted. </p>
<p>Dumont writes of her mother’s “laughter without any happiness in it”. She can’t remember her mother “ever being calm”. Perhaps her mother’s family history might account for this: she had an alcoholic brother who died young and a father diagnosed with PTSD – Dumont recalls him as “emotionally detached and damaged”. </p>
<p>The watchful young Adele falls into a pattern of reasoning that is common to hyperaware and highly empathic children who sense something amiss in the people they love. She feels responsible for, in this case, her mother’s suffering. </p>
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Read more:
<a href="https://theconversation.com/can-reading-help-heal-us-and-process-our-emotions-or-is-that-just-a-story-we-tell-ourselves-197789">Can reading help heal us and process our emotions – or is that just a story we tell ourselves?</a>
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<h2>Compensating by being ‘exceptional’</h2>
<p>One possible clue to the origins of the hair-pulling habit is that the young Adele resented comparison with her mother (her thick hair or full cheeks, for example) but loved being noticed for being “just like Papa” for her habit of playing with her hair while reading. This innocuous-seeming gesture was, in Dumont’s words “a convenient cover for what I was really doing”. </p>
<p>Another clue is Dumont’s tendency towards perfectionism and savage self-criticism. Like so many young women who, sadly, are not comfortable about their appearance, Dumont developed “good girl” behaviours and excelled at school, writing and languages. (“To compensate for this ugliness I needed to be exceptional – exceptionally good, exceptionally polite, exceptionally kind.”) She became a teacher of English and taught asylum-seekers in detention, the subject of her first book. </p>
<p>Dumont claims her secret was too “nebulous” to even attempt putting into words. But she manages to powerfully and elegantly deconstruct the experience of a hair-pulling episode, at the same time cautioning her reader (“you”) that this might be painful to bear. </p>
<p>She describes the urge to go to the place “where only [she] could go”, the desire to pull, the trance-like state it engendered. In her transportation, she finds something “unknowable”, a kind of clarity and “grace”: </p>
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<p>Rather than different thoughts all jostling for attention, I am able to discern one strand of thought, which reveals itself as cleanly as a fishbone lifted from its surrounding flesh. This strand of thought distinguishes itself not only in its purity but in its fluidity; roaming and cartwheeling and leaping like a creature released.</p>
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<p>Dumont manages very effectively to evoke the full, sensory, “surreal” experience of hair-pulling for her. As a reader, I felt I could enter her world and (almost) comprehend the payoffs of the behaviour. I understood these as something to do with being in flow and claiming an intimate, secret space of oneness with self. There is some enlightenment, yet enough mystery to keep reading. </p>
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<em>
<strong>
Read more:
<a href="https://theconversation.com/pulling-out-your-hair-in-frustration-what-you-need-to-know-about-trichotillomania-45228">Pulling out your hair in frustration? What you need to know about trichotillomania</a>
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</p>
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<h2>Defining compulsions</h2>
<p>There are no simple answers to the problem of trichotillomania: “I wanted to stop pulling, but I also wanted to pull. And one of these desires was always stronger than the other.”</p>
<p>The ambivalence Dumont reveals about her hair-pulling is also reflected in the “irreconcilable” chasm she feels between herself and others, and between her known self and the self revealed to others. It also explains her resistance to therapy. </p>
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<a href="https://images.theconversation.com/files/581237/original/file-20240312-22-3mx1s3.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=1000&fit=clip"><img alt="" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/581237/original/file-20240312-22-3mx1s3.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=237&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/581237/original/file-20240312-22-3mx1s3.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=934&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/581237/original/file-20240312-22-3mx1s3.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=934&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/581237/original/file-20240312-22-3mx1s3.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=934&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/581237/original/file-20240312-22-3mx1s3.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=1173&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/581237/original/file-20240312-22-3mx1s3.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=1173&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/581237/original/file-20240312-22-3mx1s3.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=1173&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px"></a>
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<p>It took Dumont 11 years to seek professional help for a disorder that started as a harmless habit and morphed into a significant compulsion that threatened relationships, work, quality of life and her future. Such resistance might resonate with anyone trying to dispense of an unwelcome habit. </p>
<p>There is the sense of not wanting to let go of something that is in some way defining, as Dumont puts it: “Nobody – no professor or psychiatrist – has the power to eradicate my compulsions. They are mine to keep.” </p>
<p>There is also, fortunately for the reader empathising strongly with Dumont’s conflict and pain, a healthy dose of self-dignity at stake (no doubt also familiar to hesitant help-seekers). “Asking someone for help was a form of cheating.”</p>
<p>But the biggest reason for resisting help or even disclosing the habit to those close to her – not even her parents or sister knew – was shame. Shame and being “ashamed at [her] own shame” drew her into a defensive cycle of approaching/resisting help and disclosure. The tension and effort of having to keep the habit secret for fear of being discovered took a toll Dumont admits is “so high it can shape one’s destiny”. </p>
<p>Dumont’s silent plea for the psychologist to whom she would eventually confide could also be “you” – her reader, her stranger. She writes: </p>
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<p>I need her to be tender and patient and sensitive but not to pity me. Professional but not clinical. I need her to understand the gravity of my situation, but not to try to amend it. </p>
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<p>It is a plea for acceptance and a strong aversion to glib solutions. </p>
<p>There is a sharply intellectual quality to this memoir, written by a deeply reflective young woman. By the last page of the memoir, I felt I was indeed Dumont’s intended reader, her stranger, her “you”. I returned her appreciation, grateful for the opportunity to walk a little in her shoes, painful though it was at times – and for her honesty, courage and intimacy. </p>
<p>Dumont’s testimony is written with perceptive insight, both into herself and those around her. She is a gifted and compassionate linguist and writer. </p>
<p>Despite the very specific nature of the subject, the memoir speaks to a broad readership: to anyone who has felt the isolation of difference, whether “being” different or simply feeling it. Hers is at once a brave appeal to readers for understanding and acceptance, and a brave read.</p><img src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/222804/count.gif" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" />
<p class="fine-print"><em><span>Jane Turner Goldsmith does not work for, consult, own shares in or receive funding from any company or organisation that would benefit from this article, and has disclosed no relevant affiliations beyond their academic appointment.</span></em></p>Adele Dumont’s affecting memoir, The Pulling, draws the reader into the secrecy, shame and impulses behind trichotilllomania, or compulsive hair-pulling.Jane Turner Goldsmith, PhD candidate, Creative Writing, University of AdelaideLicensed as Creative Commons – attribution, no derivatives.tag:theconversation.com,2011:article/2059832023-06-11T11:22:20Z2023-06-11T11:22:20ZHow to avoid toxic perfectionism when planning a wedding<figure><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/530285/original/file-20230606-27-ajm67a.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&rect=252%2C18%2C5385%2C3872&q=45&auto=format&w=496&fit=clip" /><figcaption><span class="caption">Focusing on having a special day rather than a perfect day can help alleviate some of the pressure people feel when planning a wedding.</span> <span class="attribution"><span class="source">(Pexels/Emma Bauso)</span></span></figcaption></figure><p>We live in the age of perfection. <a href="https://doi.org/10.1177/1088868318814973">Perfectionism is a personality trait that involves demanding a flawless standard of performance and harshly evaluating ourselves and others.</a> Expectations are so high that something is either flawless or worthless. </p>
<p><a href="https://doi.org/10.1037/bul0000138">Perfectionism rates steadily increased over recent decades</a>, and our culture is now obsessed: the perfect body, job, partner, vacation … the perfect life. <a href="https://doi.org/10.1177/1088868318814973">We believe others demand more of us and we demand more of others and ourselves</a>. </p>
<p>Nowhere is this more obvious than weddings.</p>
<p>After <a href="https://www.dal.ca/faculty/science/psychology_neuroscience/faculty-staff/our-faculty/simon-sherry.html">25 years researching this topic (and more than 100 publications)</a>, I take particular interest in cultural trends that encourage perfectionism — and weddings take the cake.</p>
<h2>Pursuing perfection</h2>
<p>Most weddings have some common elements: two people, often dressed in some combination of white dress and/or nice suit, exchange vows and rings. But now, in the age of social media and the wedding industry, the wedding must have an <em><em>esthetic</em></em>. The reception must be themed, the ceremony colour co-ordinated, and above all: it. must. be. perfect. </p>
<p><a href="https://www.pinterest.ca/today/best/2023s-top-wedding-trends/110204/">Pinterest inspiration boards</a> set the tone and <a href="https://www.instagram.com/explore/tags/perfectwedding/">Instagram photos</a> set the standard. Perfection is the tale and social media the teller. Where’s the romance?</p>
<p><div data-react-class="InstagramEmbed" data-react-props="{"url":"https://www.instagram.com/p/CseTY3Mu2z2","accessToken":"127105130696839|b4b75090c9688d81dfd245afe6052f20"}"></div></p>
<p><a href="https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-319-18582-8_10">Many perfectionists are sensitive to rank, status and dominance in social groups, which drives envy, jealousy and a desire to best others and turns everything into a competition</a>. Weddings are a major milestone that change or reinforce social status; as such, people seek perfection to ridiculous extremes. Minute details are fussed over to the exclusion of what should really matter: the love that brought everyone together in the first place.</p>
<p>How can you have a beautiful, romantic, special day without falling into the trap of relentlessly pursuing perfection? Well, you forget perfection and focus on people. </p>
<h2>Pressure from other people</h2>
<p>There is immense pressure to plan a party that pleases staid family members and adventurous friends alike. <a href="https://doi.org/10.1037/0022-3514.60.3.456">Socially prescribed perfectionism is the belief that society, family and friends have unrealistic expectations of perfection of you</a>. </p>
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<img alt="A young woman and an older woman sitting facing away from each other, looking angry" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/531027/original/file-20230608-23-et4qwg.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/531027/original/file-20230608-23-et4qwg.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=338&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/531027/original/file-20230608-23-et4qwg.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=338&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/531027/original/file-20230608-23-et4qwg.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=338&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/531027/original/file-20230608-23-et4qwg.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=424&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/531027/original/file-20230608-23-et4qwg.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=424&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/531027/original/file-20230608-23-et4qwg.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=424&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px">
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<span class="caption">There is immense pressure to plan an event that will please everyone.</span>
<span class="attribution"><span class="source">(Shutterstock)</span></span>
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<p>If your mother is in tears because you’re questioning a religious ceremony, ask yourself these three things: </p>
<ol>
<li><p><strong>What are our values?</strong> <a href="https://www.visualcapitalist.com/most-influential-values/">Figure out what you value</a> and translate those values into actions. If you and your partner want to interact with each guest, invite only your nearest and dearest. If you’re environmentally conscious, swap disposable decorations for in-season florals. Are you animal lovers? Ask guests to donate to your choice of charity instead of buying a gift. If you make your wedding a reflection of your values, then you’re less likely to <a href="https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jbusres.2022.113341">view it as a “failure” if it doesn’t conform to others’ expectations, as perfectionists often do</a>. </p></li>
<li><p><strong>What do we want?</strong> Striving for perfection is costly. There is pressure to spend on the perfect rings, fancy paper invitations, a tropical honeymoon and more. The wedding industry capitalizes on these expectations, turning weddings into major investments <a href="https://www.moneysense.ca/spend/average-wedding-cost-canada/">costing an average of $22,000 to $30,000</a>. These “ideals” aren’t feasible for every budget. These are wants, not needs, so allocate your funds where <em>you</em> want them to go. A courthouse wedding, grocery store flowers and a potluck dinner with friends can be just as special. <a href="https://thelostconnections.com/">Perfectionists can wrap their esteem and identity up in <em>things</em>, until “junk values” like consumerism dominate</a>. The point is to celebrate, not spend money pleasing others, so don’t feel pressured to go into debt. </p></li>
<li><p><strong>How do we grow?</strong> Too often, couples fall into <a href="https://doi.org/10.1037/0022-3514.74.2.360">the trap of “destiny.”</a> The problem with this “perfect match” mindset is it’s too easy to say “I guess it wasn’t meant to be” when things get tough. <a href="https://doi.org/10.1186/s12889-022-14802-5">Disney movies and romance novels entrenched fairy-tale endings into popular culture</a>, but life doesn’t end with a wedding. Both during and after the wedding, you’ll face challenges and disagreements. If you focus on growing together as you plan your wedding and beyond, you’re less likely to <a href="https://doi.org/10.1007/BF01172967">catastrophize — as many perfectionists do — when things (or your partner) aren’t perfect</a>. </p></li>
</ol>
<h2>Pressure you put on others</h2>
<p>You agonize over orchestrating the perfect day, and then your sister’s baby bawls during the ceremony and Uncle Johnny gets drunk and makes rude jokes during the reception. When stakes seem high, you can end up <a href="https://doi.org/10.1037/0022-3514.60.3.456">demanding perfection from others, known as other-oriented perfectionism</a>. <a href="https://psycnet.apa.org/record/2017-21407-009">If they fail to be perfect, that’s when bridezillas, groomzillas or monsters-in-law can emerge</a>. </p>
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<img alt="A wedding cake that has fallen to the floor" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/531028/original/file-20230608-16844-zx6m64.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/531028/original/file-20230608-16844-zx6m64.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/531028/original/file-20230608-16844-zx6m64.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/531028/original/file-20230608-16844-zx6m64.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/531028/original/file-20230608-16844-zx6m64.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/531028/original/file-20230608-16844-zx6m64.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/531028/original/file-20230608-16844-zx6m64.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px">
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<span class="caption">If you are excessively concerned with making mistakes, then avoiding them monopolizes the event.</span>
<span class="attribution"><span class="source">(Shutterstock)</span></span>
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<p>When something inevitably goes wrong, remember these three things:</p>
<ol>
<li><p><strong>Right partner versus right wedding</strong>. Weddings are meant to celebrate love. At the end of the day, you go home with your new spouse regardless of whether the wedding meets your expectations. This is just one day of the rest of your lives, so what’s more important? Having the right wedding or having and being the right partner? Focusing on each other, instead of the event, means <a href="https://www.proquest.com/docview/1292258894">others’ behaviour won’t feel world-ending</a> because it’s not affecting your relationship. </p></li>
<li><p><strong>Focus on relationships</strong>. You’ve invited your guests to share in a special moment in your life. Is it then more important that the wedding party looks fit for <em>Vogue</em> or that you have your best friends to support you? <a href="https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-319-18582-8_10">Perfectionists don’t play nicely with others because they’re more concerned with others’ performance than the people themselves</a>. For example, a perfectionist might care more about whether their mother’s speech evokes the “right” reactions from the crowd than how she’s feeling about this milestone in your life. If you prioritize your loved ones, the day becomes about connecting with them rather than ensuring they’re playing their part perfectly.</p></li>
<li><p><strong>Mistakes are normal</strong>. Everyone makes mistakes. Your dad will trip on your train. Your groomsman will make an awkward speech. Your dinner will be late. It happens. If you, like <a href="https://doi.org/10.1007/BF01172967">perfectionists, are excessively concerned with making mistakes</a>, then avoiding them monopolizes the event. Breathe and laugh it off. </p></li>
</ol>
<h2>Pressure you put on yourself</h2>
<p>There can be a lot of pressure to <a href="https://www.brides.com/gallery/wedding-beauty-best-tips">look perfect on your wedding day</a>. It’s common for <a href="https://doi.org/10.1016/j.appet.2007.11.001">brides to diet</a>, invest in teeth whitening and skin-care regimes before their wedding and hire makeup artists for the event. <a href="https://www.mensjournal.com/health-fitness/how-get-shape-wedding-according-how-much-time-you-have">Grooms may feel</a> pressure <a href="https://www.gq.com/story/wedding-workout-plan">to get fitter</a>. </p>
<p>This feeds <a href="https://doi.org/10.1037/0022-3514.84.6.1303">self-oriented perfectionism (demanding perfection of oneself) and perfectionistic self-presentation (presenting yourself as perfect and hiding or denying flaws)</a>. </p>
<p>It can be hard to feel confident if you don’t think you meet these expectations, but try to keep these three things in mind:</p>
<ol>
<li><p><strong>Perfection is a myth</strong>. No one, and nothing, is perfect. There will undoubtedly be “flaws” somewhere. Maybe you stress-sweat. Maybe you stutter during your vows. These are the things you remember fondly. It’s often the “imperfections” that make your memories — and your wedding — perfect. Reminding yourself that perfection is an unrealistic, and even undesirable, standard can keep you from striving for it.</p></li>
<li><p><strong>It’s not a competition</strong>. You and the couple down the street have very different interests, relationships and values. Their elaborate, 300-guest wedding may have been right for them. They may not understand your desire to have an intimate 50-attendee affair instead, but that doesn’t matter. Both weddings are uniquely beautiful. You want to make memories, not a statement. Despite what perfectionistic thinking might tell you, your wedding isn’t a failure and this isn’t a competition.</p></li>
<li><p><strong>You are loved</strong>. You might not look like the model did in your gown or suit. That’s OK. <a href="https://doi.org/10.1037/0022-3514.84.1.234">Perfectionists are prone to feelings of failure, guilt, shame and low self-esteem because of their harsh self-evaluations and criticisms</a>. However, your partner fell in love with you <em>with</em> the freckles and goofy laugh. You may become more fit or afford a more flattering outfit in the years to come, but that shouldn’t ruin your enjoyment of this moment. You don’t have to be perfect to be loved.</p></li>
</ol>
<p>It is, after all, your <em>special</em> day, not your <em>perfect</em> day.</p><img src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/205983/count.gif" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" />
<p class="fine-print"><em><span>Simon Sherry receives funding from the Social Sciences and Humanities Research Council of Canada. He also owns CRUX Psychology, a private practice in psychology.</span></em></p>Weddings have become increasingly curated: everything from the shoes to the table runners are perfectly themed and colour-co-ordinated. It is emblematic of our cultural obsession with perfection.Simon Sherry, Clinical Psychologist and Professor in the Department of Psychology and Neuroscience, Dalhousie UniversityLicensed as Creative Commons – attribution, no derivatives.tag:theconversation.com,2011:article/1904872022-11-28T15:11:08Z2022-11-28T15:11:08ZPerfectionist teens reported more depression and stress during COVID-19<figure><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/495949/original/file-20221117-21-fofm3w.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&rect=0%2C165%2C6500%2C3757&q=45&auto=format&w=496&fit=clip" /><figcaption><span class="caption">Perfectionists tend to be unable to or at least reluctant to adapt to changing situations.</span> <span class="attribution"><span class="source">(Pexels /Julia M Cameron)</span></span></figcaption></figure><iframe style="width: 100%; height: 100px; border: none; position: relative; z-index: 1;" allowtransparency="" allow="clipboard-read; clipboard-write" src="https://narrations.ad-auris.com/widget/the-conversation-canada/perfectionist-teens-reported-more-depression-and-stress-during-covid-19" width="100%" height="400"></iframe>
<p>Perfectionists are sometimes <a href="https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/21087903/">thought of as superheroes</a>: people who are high achievers and seem to always <a href="https://www.wellandgood.com/imposter-syndrome-perfectionism/">have it all together</a>.</p>
<p>Perfectionism is different from simply trying to do a good job or even seeking <a href="https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/35201817/">excellence</a>. Rather, perfectionism refers to rigidly requiring nothing short of absolute perfection and being highly self-critical.</p>
<p><a href="https://doi.org/10.1111/cdev.13855">Our recent study</a>, published in the journal <em>Child Development</em>, examined how perfectionism is affecting teens’ mental health and stress levels during the COVID-19 pandemic. </p>
<h2>Exacting standards</h2>
<p>While <a href="https://doi.org/10.1007/s10648-019-09484-2">research shows</a> some forms of perfectionism are related to small achievement gains, it also reveals perfectionism is commonly associated with experiencing more <a href="https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jrp.2005.04.002">health problems</a> along with <a href="https://doi.org/10.1016/j.paid.2012.02.009">relationship difficulties</a>. </p>
<p>People higher in perfectionism even show <a href="https://doi.org/10.1016/j.bbih.2021.100211">dysregulated immune system functioning</a>. </p>
<p>Perfectionists do not fare any better with respect to their mental health: <a href="https://doi.org/10.1002/jclp.22435">research</a> indicates perfectionistic individuals report higher levels of depressive symptoms, stress, disordered eating and anxiety compared to their less perfectionistic peers. </p>
<p>Perfectionistic people are particularly susceptible to experiencing these adverse consequences when they <a href="https://doi.org/10.1007/BF02686885">are stressed</a> or faced with difficult and uncertain situations, because they tend to be unable to or at least reluctant to adapt to changing situations. </p>
<p>Thus, there is good reason to be highly concerned about perfectionists during the continually <a href="https://theconversation.com/covid-19-and-mental-health-feeling-anguish-is-normal-and-is-not-a-disorder-153784">evolving pandemic that has been exceptionally stressful for</a> most people.</p>
<figure class="align-center ">
<img alt="A girl in a sweatshirt that says 'always cute, always cool, always positive." src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/495919/original/file-20221117-19-fioa9t.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&rect=0%2C15%2C5136%2C3165&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/495919/original/file-20221117-19-fioa9t.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/495919/original/file-20221117-19-fioa9t.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/495919/original/file-20221117-19-fioa9t.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/495919/original/file-20221117-19-fioa9t.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/495919/original/file-20221117-19-fioa9t.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/495919/original/file-20221117-19-fioa9t.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px">
<figcaption>
<span class="caption">There is good reason to be concerned about teen perfectionists in the pandemic.</span>
<span class="attribution"><span class="source">(Zen Chung/Pexels)</span></span>
</figcaption>
</figure>
<h2>Perfectionism as personality trait</h2>
<p>When measuring perfectionism as a personality trait, psychology researchers identify different “flavours” of <a href="https://doi.org/10.1177/0734282916651381">perfectionism</a>. </p>
<p>Self-oriented perfectionism refers to requiring perfection from oneself. People high in self-oriented perfectionism demand perfection from themselves and are incredibly hard on themselves when they do not meet those demands. </p>
<p>Socially prescribed perfectionism refers to the belief or perception that others require perfection. Individuals who are high in socially prescribed perfectionism think others demand perfection from them, are critical of them and believe that they will never measure up to others’ expectations. </p>
<p>These forms of perfectionism are commonly observed in teens, a group that experiences relatively high levels of perfectionism. <a href="https://doi.org/10.1002/pits.21792">Research shows</a> that approximately one in four youth are highly perfectionistic.</p>
<h2>Lack of closure, opportunities</h2>
<p>It is important to focus on how young people are doing during these difficult times. Unlike adults who have already gained their sense of independence, the pandemic and its accompanying restrictions have held teens back in a state of suspended reality. </p>
<p>For example, many teens have completely missed out on significant developmental <a href="https://theconversation.com/how-to-help-high-school-seniors-cope-with-milestones-missed-due-to-coronavirus-139147">milestones such as graduations and proms</a>, leaving them feeling lost due to a lack of closure on important chapters of their lives. </p>
<hr>
<p>
<em>
<strong>
Read more:
<a href="https://theconversation.com/students-returning-to-campus-want-the-university-experience-missed-during-covid-19-186507">Students returning to campus want the 'university experience' missed during COVID-19</a>
</strong>
</em>
</p>
<hr>
<p>Government-mandated lockdowns <a href="https://www.cbc.ca/news/politics/federal-modelling-covid-19-case-count-1.5999634">that were put in place to slow the spread of COVID-19</a> forced young people into isolation where they were often separated from friends and family for extended periods of time. School closures also led to substantial interruptions to young people’s schooling, which is associated with gaps in <a href="https://covid19-sciencetable.ca/wp-content/uploads/2022/01/Ontario-Returns-to-School-An-Overview-of-the-Science_20220112-1.pdf">in educational achievement</a>.</p>
<p>It is not hard to imagine how difficult gaps would be for young perfectionists who often define themselves by their ability to achieve.</p>
<figure class="align-center ">
<img alt="A mother next to a teen looking at homework." src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/495930/original/file-20221117-27-73djg1.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/495930/original/file-20221117-27-73djg1.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/495930/original/file-20221117-27-73djg1.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/495930/original/file-20221117-27-73djg1.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/495930/original/file-20221117-27-73djg1.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/495930/original/file-20221117-27-73djg1.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/495930/original/file-20221117-27-73djg1.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px">
<figcaption>
<span class="caption">A lack of closure on important chapters of their lives has been a stressor on youth.</span>
<span class="attribution"><span class="source">(Pexels/Andrea Piacquadio)</span></span>
</figcaption>
</figure>
<h2>Effects of lockdowns</h2>
<p>Our study shows the significant effects lockdowns have had on the self-reported mental health of teens. </p>
<p>We assessed 187 adolescents’ levels of perfectionism, anxiety symptoms, stress and depressive symptoms before the pandemic began and then again during the first and <a href="https://news.ontario.ca/en/release/59922/ontario-declares-second-provincial-emergency-to-address-covid-19-crisis-and-save-lives">second government-mandated lockdowns</a> that took place in Ontario, Canada.</p>
<p>Results showed an interesting pattern of change with respect to depressive symptoms and stress levels. Depressive symptoms and stress decreased slightly from before the pandemic began to the first lockdown and then increased dramatically from the first to second lockdown. </p>
<hr>
<p>
<em>
<strong>
Read more:
<a href="https://theconversation.com/quebec-tried-to-keep-schools-open-during-the-pandemic-heres-what-high-school-students-experienced-169119">Québec tried to keep schools open during the pandemic. Here’s what high school students experienced</a>
</strong>
</em>
</p>
<hr>
<p>Although we cannot be sure, one possible explanation for these findings is that teens were able to take a much-needed break from their busy and possibly overscheduled lives during the first lockdown, which resulted in some relief of depressive symptoms and stress. </p>
<p>However, by the time the second lockdown occurred, teens may have been feeling demoralized and hopeless as the pandemic continued to take its toll on everyone, resulting in higher levels of stress and depressive symptoms.</p>
<h2>How perfectionists fared</h2>
<p>A key finding is that teen perfectionists are not faring as well during the pandemic compared to their non-perfectionistic peers. Teens who demanded perfection from themselves (self-oriented perfectionists) were more depressed, anxious and stressed than those who did not tend to demand perfection from themselves over the course of the pandemic. </p>
<p>Results also showed that when teens experienced higher than their typical levels of self-oriented perfectionism, they were also more anxious, but not more depressed or stressed. </p>
<p>Teenagers who believed that others demanded perfection from them were more depressed and stressed than those who did not have such beliefs during the pandemic. </p>
<p>We also found that when teens experienced more of these beliefs than usual, they were more depressed, but not more anxious or stressed.</p>
<h2>Struggles behind the mask</h2>
<figure class="align-left ">
<img alt="A teen in a superhero mask." src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/495915/original/file-20221117-13-ed8a7o.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=237&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/495915/original/file-20221117-13-ed8a7o.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/495915/original/file-20221117-13-ed8a7o.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/495915/original/file-20221117-13-ed8a7o.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/495915/original/file-20221117-13-ed8a7o.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/495915/original/file-20221117-13-ed8a7o.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/495915/original/file-20221117-13-ed8a7o.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px">
<figcaption>
<span class="caption">Perfectionist teens aren’t superheroes who are impervious to hardships.</span>
<span class="attribution"><span class="source">(Pexels/Cottonbro Studio)</span></span>
</figcaption>
</figure>
<p>Taken together, these findings support the idea that perfectionistic teens are more vulnerable to mental health problems and greater stress compared to their non-perfectionistic peers during the pandemic. </p>
<p>It is important to recognize that although teen perfectionists <a href="https://doi.org/10.1177/0829573512468845">often appear to be doing well on the surface</a>, they are not superheroes who are impervious to hardships.</p>
<p>Instead, they are young people who are often in distress and struggling behind their mask of perfection and in need of support during these difficult times.</p><img src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/190487/count.gif" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" />
<p class="fine-print"><em><span>Danielle S. Molnar receives funding from the Canada Research Chairs Program, the Social Sciences and Humanities Research Council, and an Early Research Award from the Ministry of Research and Innovation, Government of Ontario. </span></em></p><p class="fine-print"><em><span>Dawn Zinga receives funding from the Social Sciences and Humanities Research Council of Canada. </span></em></p><p class="fine-print"><em><span>Melissa Blackburn does not work for, consult, own shares in or receive funding from any company or organisation that would benefit from this article, and has disclosed no relevant affiliations beyond their academic appointment.</span></em></p>Although teen perfectionists often appear to be doing well on the surface, they are not impervious to hardships. They are young people who are often in need of support.Danielle S. Molnar, Associate Professor of Child and Youth Studies; Canada Research Chair (Tier II) Adjustment and Well-Being in Children and Youth, Brock UniversityDawn Zinga, Professor of Child and Youth Studies; Associate Dean, Graduate Studies and Research, Faculty of Social Sciences, Brock UniversityMelissa Blackburn, PhD Candidate, Child and Youth Studies, Brock UniversityLicensed as Creative Commons – attribution, no derivatives.tag:theconversation.com,2011:article/1843772022-06-29T12:05:17Z2022-06-29T12:05:17ZAn online life coaching program for female physicians decreases burnout, increases self-compassion and cures impostor syndrome, according to a new study<figure><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/470120/original/file-20220621-15-eoobjz.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=496&fit=clip" /><figcaption><span class="caption">Physician burnout is more prevalent in women than men. </span> <span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://www.gettyimages.com/detail/photo/asian-female-medical-professional-sitting-in-chair-royalty-free-image/91497435?adppopup=true">ER Productions Limited/DigitalVision via Getty Images</a></span></figcaption></figure><p><em>The <a href="https://theconversation.com/us/topics/research-brief-83231">Research Brief</a> is a short take about interesting academic work.</em></p>
<h2>The big idea</h2>
<p>An online group coaching program that normalizes vulnerability and emotional processing can help fix burnout in female physicians, <a href="https://doi.org/10.1001/jamanetworkopen.2022.10752">our study found</a>. The doctors who participated in this program went from highly to only mildly burned out, while their peers who were not in the program became even more burned out.</p>
<p><a href="https://www.massmed.org/Publications/Research,-Studies,-and-Reports/Physician-Burnout-Report-2018/">Physician burnout</a> happens when doctors lose satisfaction and a sense of efficacy at work and become exhausted instead of fulfilled. </p>
<p>We wanted to address the experiences that negatively affect medical training and begin healing the culture. So we created an online life coaching program: <a href="https://bettertogetherphysiciancoaching.com/">Better Together Physician Coaching</a>, or simply Better Together, as we call it.</p>
<p>Better Together involves twice-weekly live group coaching calls facilitated by either one of us, who are both <a href="https://coachadriennemannmd.com/">certified life coaches</a> <a href="https://som.ucdenver.edu/Profiles/Faculty/Profile/30649">and physicians</a>. The program also includes unlimited anonymous written coaching on the website’s forum as well as weekly worksheets and webinars. The content centers around topics that matter to female doctors such as career decisions, receiving critical feedback and dealing with perfectionism. It also focuses on <a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC7571643/#">impostor syndrome</a> – the feeling of doubt about one’s skills despite ample evidence to the contrary – and practicing <a href="https://doi.org/10.4236/psych.2019.103021">self-compassion</a>. </p>
<p>In late 2020, 101 female resident doctors at the University of Colorado volunteered to participate in Better Together and were randomized to either receive the coaching program, or not to, from January to June 2021. Using a scale called the <a href="https://www.mindgarden.com/117-maslach-burnout-inventory-mbi">Maslach Burnout Inventory</a>, we measured participants’ emotional exhaustion. We also measured depersonalization – meaning the extent to which they had an unfeeling or impersonal response to their work – and their sense of professional accomplishment. </p>
<p>Our study also assessed the participants’ levels of impostor syndrome, self-compassion and “moral injury,” which is the accumulation of negative effects by continued exposure to morally distressing situations. </p>
<p>Participants in the coaching program reported significantly lower levels of emotional exhaustion – the primary facet of burnout. They also reported significantly less impostor syndrome and increased levels of self-compassion. The magnitudes of improvement were higher than most <a href="https://doi.org/10.1007/s11606-021-06903-5">other interventions</a> aimed at <a href="https://doi.org/10.1371/journal.pone.0250104">improving well-being among residents</a>. </p>
<h2>Why it matters</h2>
<p>A 2018 Harvard report called physician burnout a <a href="https://www.massmed.org/Publications/Research,-Studies,-and-Reports/Physician-Burnout-Report-2018/">“public health crisis” that urgently demands action</a>. And a systematic review of research found that <a href="https://doi.org/10.1001/jama.2018.12777">up to 80% of physicians experience burnout</a>. </p>
<p>It impacts <a href="https://meridian.allenpress.com/jgme/article/1/2/236/33694/Burnout-During-Residency-Training-A-Literature">a majority of medical trainees and doctors</a> and disproportionately <a href="https://doi.org/10.1016/j.eclinm.2021.100879">affects women and those who are underrepresented in medicine</a>. Physician burnout <a href="https://doi.org/10.4300/jgme-d-09-00054.1">begins early in training</a> and is associated with <a href="https://doi.org/10.1016/s0140-6736(09)61424-0">more errors, higher patient mortality rates, depression, suicidal thoughts</a> and <a href="https://hbr.org/2022/01/why-so-many-women-physicians-are-quitting">high job turnover</a>. </p>
<p>What many medical educators refer to as the <a href="https://doi.org/10.1136%2Fbmj.329.7469.770">hidden curriculum of medical training</a> has historically promoted a culture <a href="https://doi.org/10.1001/jama.2022.10006">where doctors place all other needs above their own</a>, a belief that reinforces perfectionism, isolation and overwork. </p>
<p>Institutions often try to improve physician well-being with offerings like free yoga, more time off or extra snacks instead of addressing the hidden curriculum and resultant toxic culture that drives burnout. At best, <a href="https://doi.org/10.1371/journal.pone.0250104">these offerings</a> have <a href="https://doi.org/10.4300/jgme-d-17-00440.1">little sustainable impact</a> on physician well-being. At worst, doctors see them as attempts to placate or gaslight. </p>
<p>This is the culture that Better Together aims to change. </p>
<h2>What still isn’t known</h2>
<p>The doctors in this pilot test of Better Together were predominantly white, heterosexual, female and cisgender. Additional studies are needed to explore this coaching program in other gender identities, diverse racial identities, career stages and at other institutions.</p>
<p>We plan to scale up and further evaluate Better Together at multiple geographically and culturally diverse sites across the U.S. in the fall of 2022.</p><img src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/184377/count.gif" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" />
<p class="fine-print"><em><span>Dr. Tyra Fainstad is a professional life coach. She coaches clients (including physicians) outside of her academic roles in an independently owned and operated LLC; in that capacity, she does not recruit or coach medical trainees. She received funding for Better Together Physician Coaching through an internal grant from the Department of Medicine at the University of Colorado, the institution she is affiliated with. </span></em></p><p class="fine-print"><em><span>Dr. Adrienne Mann is a professional life coach. She provides coaching and consulting to individuals (including physicians) and groups outside of her academic role through an independently owned and operated LLC. In that capacity, she does not recruit or coach medical trainees. She received grant funding from the University of Colorado Department of Medicine for the development and Study of Better Together Physician Coaching. </span></em></p>Physician burnout is a severe problem in the medical field, made much worse by the COVID-19 pandemic. But an online coaching program that could be scaled up had dramatic results for participants.Tyra Fainstad, Associate Professor of Internal Medicine, University of Colorado Anschutz Medical CampusAdrienne Mann, Assistant Professor of Hospital Medicine, University of Colorado Anschutz Medical CampusLicensed as Creative Commons – attribution, no derivatives.tag:theconversation.com,2011:article/1745042022-01-26T10:06:34Z2022-01-26T10:06:34ZPerfectionism can harm even the most talented student – but schools can make a difference<figure><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/441733/original/file-20220120-8856-f724gr.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&rect=0%2C0%2C5648%2C3760&q=45&auto=format&w=496&fit=clip" /><figcaption><span class="caption">
</span> <span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://www.shutterstock.com/image-photo/upset-black-school-girl-doing-homework-2059077377">Prostock-studio/Shutterstock</a></span></figcaption></figure><p>Depending on the circumstances, perfectionism can lead to better performance in school or at work. Or it can make performance worse. But any performance gains are likely to be outweighed by <a href="https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/full/10.1177/01650254211037400">wellbeing issues</a>. There are links between perfectionism and <a href="https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/26231736/">burnout</a> and <a href="https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/pdf/10.1002/per.2053">depression</a>, for example. </p>
<p>Evidence for these types of negative effects has been found in a range of settings, including among young people for whom perfectionism is a vulnerability factor for mental health. However, practical measures – like school lessons – could make a difference. </p>
<p>Perfectionism is a personality characteristic that includes the tendency to have unrealistically high standards and to be overly critical. It can lead to a complex mix of a desire to prove yourself and a fear of inadequacy, and consequently the frequent experience of anxiety, worry and doubt. </p>
<p>There are some recent studies that vividly illustrate the vulnerability of young people to perfectionism. For example, in one <a href="https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0191886921007340">study</a> led by one of the PhD students in my research group looked at the relationship between perfectionism and social media use. </p>
<p>The study of 135 adolescent girls found the female teenagers who were most likely to report depressive symptoms when comparing their appearance to others were those who reported higher levels of “self-critical perfectionism”. </p>
<p>Our research group also conducted a large <a href="https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s10648-021-09597-7">review of academic research</a> that has been conducted on perfectionism among academically gifted students. This also showed the various ways perfectionism can influence students.</p>
<p>Drawing from 36 studies in this area, we found that the doubts, concerns, and fears characteristic of perfectionism can take their toll on even the most talented students. </p>
<p>Surprisingly, <a href="https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/10.1177/016235321003300403?icid=int.sj-challenge-page.citing-articles.3">only one study</a> had tested out practical ways to address perfectionism. The findings were promising, though. There was some evidence that a series of lessons focused on coping with pressures, expectations, and the unhealthy aspects of perfectionism could help students. </p>
<p>We were motivated by the lack of work in this area and the belief that teachers and schools can play a key role in preventing difficulties with perfectionism before they arise. We have explored what can be done in the classroom to support students who have perfectionistic tendencies.</p>
<h2>Practical approaches</h2>
<p>Working with the education charity the National Association for Able Children in Education (<a href="https://www.nace.co.uk/">NACE</a>), colleagues and I have put together <a href="https://www.nace.co.uk/page/perfectionism">resources to help schools</a> respond to this area of concern and to provide practical suggestions for young people, teachers and parents. </p>
<p>One of our resources is a simple classroom lesson designed to increase levels of “perfectionism literacy”. Our intention in creating the resource was to help young people recognise the features of perfectionism, increase their knowledge of the help available, and become more willing to seek help if needed. </p>
<p>The lesson provides information on perfectionism and includes an activity focused on the difference between perfectionism and doing things well. </p>
<p>The purpose of this task is to emphasise that often, good is good enough. Pursuing perfection is unnecessary and unrealistic, and working hard and doing your best is not only different from aiming to be perfect, but also a better and more rewarding goal. </p>
<figure class="align-center ">
<img alt="Girls in class writing on whiteboard" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/441747/original/file-20220120-9603-7cxyfe.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/441747/original/file-20220120-9603-7cxyfe.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/441747/original/file-20220120-9603-7cxyfe.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/441747/original/file-20220120-9603-7cxyfe.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/441747/original/file-20220120-9603-7cxyfe.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/441747/original/file-20220120-9603-7cxyfe.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/441747/original/file-20220120-9603-7cxyfe.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px">
<figcaption>
<span class="caption">Aim to do your best rather than for perfection.</span>
<span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://www.shutterstock.com/image-photo/cute-high-school-friends-laughing-having-200191571">antoniodiaz/Shutterstock</a></span>
</figcaption>
</figure>
<p>Another activity teaches young people about different <a href="https://cdn.ymaws.com/www.nace.co.uk/resource/collection/59FBB803-F446-4094-9346-44BFC56CE3F9/PerfectionismLiteracyLessonReport.pdf">“flavours” of perfectionism</a>. This analogy draws attention to how perfectionism comes in different forms and how it can include views of others and how others view us. </p>
<p>We tend to think of perfectionism in personal terms – having unrealistic standards for ourselves, for example. However, perfectionism can also <a href="https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007%2Fs10862-013-9397-7">include others</a>, expecting perfection from others or believing that others expect you to be perfect. </p>
<p>This means that perfectionism influences not only our own wellbeing but can also have a negative impact on our relationships with others.</p>
<p>We recently <a href="https://cdn.ymaws.com/www.nace.co.uk/resource/collection/59FBB803-F446-4094-9346-44BFC56CE3F9/PerfectionismLiteracyLessonReport.pdf">piloted the materials</a> in one secondary school. Students were guided through the lesson by a teacher who received a small amount of training and the opportunity to ask questions and practice with the materials. </p>
<p>Our evaluation of the lesson showed that it had a positive impact on students. Following the lesson, students reported they had more knowledge of perfectionism and better recognised the importance of seeking support if needed.</p>
<p>It is also important that teachers consider the degree to which <a href="https://www.nace.co.uk/blogpost/1761881/358013/How-perfectionistic-is-your-classroom">current practice in their classrooms</a> might inadvertently encourage, rather than discourage, perfectionistic thinking in their students. </p>
<p>Unrealistic expectations, frequent or excessive criticism, anxiousness over mistakes, and public use of rewards and sanctions may all reinforce perfectionism in students. Although this is a new area of research and teaching practice, we think it is key to long-term positive changes.</p>
<p>Teachers and parents need to be able to recognise perfectionistic behaviour and the difficulties that children and young people may experience as a result. In schools, increasing the understanding of perfectionism among teachers is a useful way of supporting student wellbeing.</p><img src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/174504/count.gif" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" />
<p class="fine-print"><em><span>Andrew P. Hill is a Research Adviser for the National Association for Able Children in Education. This is an unpaid role.
</span></em></p>Pursuing perfection is unnecessary and unrealistic.Andrew P. Hill, Professor in the School of Science, Technology, and Health, York St John UniversityLicensed as Creative Commons – attribution, no derivatives.tag:theconversation.com,2011:article/954792021-11-03T16:03:24Z2021-11-03T16:03:24ZSocial media: teenage girls with perfectionist tendencies need to take extra care – here’s how<figure><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/218815/original/file-20180514-100716-1h6l1b.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&rect=19%2C26%2C979%2C619&q=45&auto=format&w=496&fit=clip" /><figcaption><span class="caption">Likes and swipes don't always make us feel good.</span> <span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://www.shutterstock.com/image-photo/girl-boredom-waiting-boring-lonely-frustrate-452021089?src=G4TmuKITDHOiTXoW6_jV1g-1-5">Shutterstock</a></span></figcaption></figure><p>We all do it. Robot-like, we endlessly scroll through social media feeds. To an extent, we even go about our daily lives staring at screens while ignoring the world around us. In fact, <a href="https://www.theguardian.com/media/2019/feb/22/bedtime-social-media-use-may-be-harming-uk-teenagers-study-says">evidence suggests</a> a fifth of adolescents spend five or more hours on social media per day. Some even log on <a href="https://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2018/02/26/children-using-social-media-midnight-every-day-report-finds/">after midnight</a>. </p>
<p>Social media platforms such as Instagram, Facebook and TikTok are a ubiquitous part of young people’s lives – especially <a href="https://bmcpublichealth.biomedcentral.com/articles/10.1186/s12889-018-5220-4">female adolescents</a>. But as <a href="https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/10.1177/2167702617723376?__hstc=12316075.560305e95fd4d1d3dbfa07d125b9de41.1525150443402.1525150443402.1525150443402.1&__hssc=12316075.1.1525150443403&__hsfp=4066443223&journalCode=cpxa">recent research</a> suggests, the psychological wellbeing of these young women may be at stake as a result. And our new study, published in the <a href="https://authors.elsevier.com/a/1d%7ECvheKdmu3i">Personality and Individual Differences</a> journal, has identified a group who may be particularly vulnerable. </p>
<p>Social media feeds are filled with beautiful models, people living perfect lives and unattainable body ideals. Photographs are altered using filters – and only a person’s highlights are shown. We find ourselves under the spell of social media, and while there are benefits to using it, it often takes an emotional toll.</p>
<p>Female adolescents are particularly vulnerable to the stringent standards of beauty displayed on social media. Social media often intensifies their insecurities and anxieties. And, in the face of the edited, perfect lives of others, many feel inadequate. </p>
<p>This is partly because social media provides female adolescents with a platform to compare their appearance with others. Sadly, <a href="https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0005789406000852">research suggests</a> that women often perceive themselves negatively in such comparisons. It has been shown to heighten <a href="https://www.researchgate.net/profile/Shelly_Grabe/publication/5259131_The_Role_of_the_Media_in_Body_Image_Concerns_Among_Women_A_Meta-Analysis_of_Experimental_and_Correlational_Studies/links/54302c850cf27e39fa9dca4b.pdf">female body-image concerns</a>, reduce <a href="https://academic.oup.com/aje/article/185/3/203/2915143">happiness</a> and increase feelings of <a href="https://academic.oup.com/aje/article/185/3/203/2915143">social alienation</a>.</p>
<h2>Rising levels of perfectionism</h2>
<p>Whether social media is harmful or not ultimately depends on who is using it, though. Our new study suggests that “self-critical perfectionism” is one characteristic which may make young women vulnerable to the harmful effects of social media. </p>
<p>Perfectionism is a personality trait characterised by irrational standards and harsh self-criticism. People who are high in self-critical perfectionism are likely to set uncompromising standards for their appearance and compare themselves negatively with others. They can also have a tendency to feel that other people or society more generally demand perfection. This can lead to chronic concerns about others’ criticism and expectations. </p>
<p><a href="http://psycnet.apa.org/record/2017-57603-001">Recent research</a> has found perfectionism to be rising in <a href="https://theconversation.com/how-perfectionism-became-a-hidden-epidemic-among-young-people-89405">young people</a>. This is particularly alarming, as perfectionism has been linked to a host of negative outcomes, <a href="https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/pdf/10.1002/per.2053">such as depression</a>, syptoms of <a href="https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/epdf/10.1002/erv.2793">eating disorders</a>, and even thoughts and ideas <a href="https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/epdf/10.1111/jopy.12333">about suicide</a>. </p>
<p>To test whether perfectionists really are more vulnerable on social media, we measured 135 female adolescents’ level of perfectionism, body appreciation, depressive symptoms and comparisons based on appearance on social media. We did this once a week for four weeks. </p>
<figure class="align-center ">
<img alt="Image of the model sisters Gigi and Bella Hadid." src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/218816/original/file-20180514-100700-1kz6vwr.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/218816/original/file-20180514-100700-1kz6vwr.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/218816/original/file-20180514-100700-1kz6vwr.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/218816/original/file-20180514-100700-1kz6vwr.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/218816/original/file-20180514-100700-1kz6vwr.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/218816/original/file-20180514-100700-1kz6vwr.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/218816/original/file-20180514-100700-1kz6vwr.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px">
<figcaption>
<span class="caption">Many young women compare themselves to models such as sisters Gigi and Bella Hadid.</span>
<span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://www.shutterstock.com/download/confirm/766243405?src=D3Wj-AdoeYjvJ2y_gyTpRg-3-50&size=medium_jpg">Shutterstock</a></span>
</figcaption>
</figure>
<p>In line with previous research, we found that the girls who were self-critical perfectionists were more likely to have greater depressive symptoms and lower body appreciation. However, we also discovered that the girls reported even more depressive symptoms and negative body image when comparing their appearance negatively to others on social media. </p>
<p>People higher in self-critical perfectionism are therefore thought to be especially vulnerable to negative social comparisons. This is because they derive their self-worth from being seen by others as flawless.</p>
<p>While social media can seemingly provide people higher in self-critical perfectionism with a fleeting fix of self-worth and validation, the endless likes, comments and follows can also evoke feelings of inadequacy. Negative comparisons will likely exacerbate perfectionists’ underlying sense of inferiority.</p>
<h2>Moving forward</h2>
<p>Although social media is an inevitable part of modern society, we suggest that adolescents who are more vulnerable to the negative effects should spend more time offline. They should also control what is shown on their social media feeds – by unfollowing or muting accounts that are triggering their anxieties. Finally, they should avoid or reappraise comparisons made with others.</p>
<p>In particular, adolescents would benefit from questioning the unrealistic standards of beauty on social media, and being more wary of the perfect images portrayed online. </p>
<p>Parents can help by talking with their adolescent children about the fact that their value as a person does not hinge on attaining a perfect appearance. They should help encourage children to avoid using social media to gain validation and self-worth. Indeed, challenging this belief and adopting greater self-compassion and self-acceptance is vital to help counteract these harmful effects.</p><img src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/95479/count.gif" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" />
<p class="fine-print"><em><span>The authors do not work for, consult, own shares in or receive funding from any company or organisation that would benefit from this article, and have disclosed no relevant affiliations beyond their academic appointment.</span></em></p>When perfectionists compare themselves to others on social media, they report feelings of depression and insecurity.Marianne E. Etherson, Ph.D., PhD Candidate and Post-Doctoral Research Fellow in Psychology, York St John UniversityThomas Curran, Assistant Professor of Psychological and Behavioural Science, London School of Economics and Political ScienceLicensed as Creative Commons – attribution, no derivatives.tag:theconversation.com,2011:article/1357482020-04-17T09:22:43Z2020-04-17T09:22:43ZThe perils of perfectionism during lockdown<figure><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/325855/original/file-20200406-160446-1ew3s02.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&rect=110%2C64%2C6040%2C4029&q=45&auto=format&w=496&fit=clip" /><figcaption><span class="caption">
</span> <span class="attribution"><span class="source">EPA/Zoltan Balogh</span></span></figcaption></figure><p>Trying to find ways to make the most of time in lockdown has motivated many people to learn new skills, polish up old ones, and tackle old to-do lists. Social media and the news present an abundance of stories about the amazing things people are accomplishing during lockdown. There are tips on how to be the perfect parent, have the perfect at-home workout routine, and even bake the <a href="https://www.walesonline.co.uk/whats-on/food-drink-news/6-steps-making-perfect-loaf-10035234">perfect loaf of bread</a>. </p>
<p>It’s easy to think that this would help people’s mental health by giving them a sense of purpose and distraction. But for those prone to perfectionism, this information can fuel feelings of insecurity and self-doubt. Striving to measure up to the examples on social media can take a further <a href="https://guilfordjournals.com/doi/abs/10.1521/jscp.2018.37.7.514">toll on mental health</a> when projects fail because you don’t have the resources needed. Perfectionism can make you more vulnerable <a href="https://www.springer.com/gb/book/9783319185811">to poor wellbeing</a> during lockdown.</p>
<h2>Unrealistic standards and self-criticism</h2>
<p>Perfectionism isn’t simply about <a href="https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/full/10.1177/1745691618797940">striving to do your best</a>. Instead it involves a tendency to have frequent thoughts about achieving ideal standards coupled with relentless striving to reach goals that are unrealistic. </p>
<p>Personality science has revealed that perfectionism comes in <a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/2027080">two main forms</a>. One is characterised by overly critical and negative views of your own behaviour, and an excessive preoccupation with other people’s expectations of your performance. These self-critical perfectionists get little satisfaction even when they do bake a lovely loaf of sourdough bread. To them, it will never be as good as the loaf their friend baked. </p>
<p>The other form of perfectionism is more similar to the common idea of a perfectionist – someone who strives to meet very high standards. But there’s a catch. Although these striving perfectionists tend to set their own standards and care less about what others think, they too have difficulty savouring successes and tend to <a href="https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0191886913002432">take on too much.</a> Chances are that if you are secretly wishing that the lockdown goes on longer so that you can get through your to-do list or achieve all your self-improvement goals, you’re probably this type of perfectionist. </p>
<h2>Social comparisons</h2>
<p>It’s natural for people to compare themselves to others to get direction when they experience uncertainty. These <a href="https://www.psychologytoday.com/gb/basics/social-comparison-theory">social comparisons</a> help us evaluate our performance and motivate self-improvement. </p>
<p>But for self-critical perfectionists, checking social media and the news for how others are dealing with lockdown can be a reminder that they are not accomplishing enough, not being the best parent, and falling short of what is expected. This can lead to <a href="https://www.psychologytoday.com/gb/blog/dont-delay/201004/the-pernicious-perils-perfectionism">worry and repetitive negative thoughts</a> about not being perfect, which can increase <a href="https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s10608-007-9173-7">risk for depression and distress</a>.</p>
<p>Feelings of not being perfect in the eyes of others provide another reason why perfectionists are at <a href="https://psycnet.apa.org/record/2018-39651-011">risk for poor mental health</a> during lockdown. Reaching out for help means admitting you’re not perfect. This is one reason why perfectionists are more prone to <a href="https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0191886908001682">social disconnection</a> and loneliness.</p>
<h2>Health</h2>
<p>With regular exercise routines disrupted, people are turning to online fitness classes and videos to stay fit during lockdown. You might expect that perfectionism would give an advantage when it comes to staying healthy. But exposure to the “perfect” exercise routine promoted by ultra-fit exercise gurus can trigger feelings of inadequacy.</p>
<p>Self-critical perfectionists may respond by simply abandoning any attempt to stay fit. My research has shown that this form of perfectionism is linked to <a href="https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/full/10.1002/per.2098">procrastination</a> and <a href="https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0092656616302173">poorer health</a>. Striving perfectionists, on the other hand, can go <a href="https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0191886910000929?casa_token=BIVlMTNK3yUAAAAA:7-xuaXmqHXRPGPy9xj9dRp22eknr3JvFRgQ6SXbyD9jpV9qemR711tMdzrp-n_lKY1hbVITI0JQ">into exercise overdrive</a> to try to become as ultra-fit as the online instructors, pushing themselves too much and increasing risk for exhaustion and injury. Neither extreme is healthy.</p>
<h2>Embrace imperfections</h2>
<p>So how can perfectionists manage their wellbeing during lockdown? Learning to accept personal limitations and imperfections is crucial, but may be easier said than done. Once a perfectionist is reminded that they are not perfect, it is difficult for them to respond with <a href="https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/full/10.1080/15298868.2019.1669695?casa_token=cMuF6hfZGDYAAAAA%3AcJ7PiM7Q9nu2-RHCs7wT9-uo-d0EOFfyNIQal5DKzvBgkaAv5giralYxYmGXZ2pD0VeTUDQ3Gaxi4w">acceptance and compassion</a> towards their shortcomings – self-criticism is the default response. This is why it’s important to limit exposure to social media that promotes perfectionism. </p>
<p>Keeping things in perspective can also help. For example, is it really the end of the world if your sourdough starter failed?</p>
<p>More importantly, reminding ourselves that we are all imperfect and that we all struggle with failures and shortcomings is essential for practicing self-compassion. Showing ourselves the same kindness and acceptance that we would for a close friend who is struggling during lockdown is one way to <a href="https://self-compassion.org/category/exercises/#exercises">cultivate this self-compassion</a>. </p>
<p>In a <a href="https://twitter.com/jk_rowling/status/1246124423880605703">recent tweet, J. K. Rowling</a> blasted social media users who were “implying people are losers if they aren’t learning a new skill” during lockdown.</p>
<p><div data-react-class="Tweet" data-react-props="{"tweetId":"1246124423880605703"}"></div></p>
<p>As she aptly noted, learning to accept our feelings and distress is “a better route back to good mental health than beating ourselves up for not being superhuman”.</p>
<p>Embracing our imperfections can help us be more aware of our mental health and feel more connected to others during lockdown. This is an important first step towards reaching out and getting help when we need it.</p><img src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/135748/count.gif" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" />
<p class="fine-print"><em><span>Fuschia Sirois receives funding from The Economic and Social Research Council (ESRC). </span></em></p>If you secretly want lockdown to last longer so you can achieve your goals, you’re not alone.Fuschia Sirois, Reader in Social & Health Psychology, University of SheffieldLicensed as Creative Commons – attribution, no derivatives.tag:theconversation.com,2011:article/1265582019-12-20T11:23:53Z2019-12-20T11:23:53ZPerfectionistic students get higher grades, but at what cost?<figure><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/307929/original/file-20191219-11951-jdds9.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&rect=32%2C56%2C5323%2C3509&q=45&auto=format&w=496&fit=clip" /><figcaption><span class="caption">
</span> <span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://www.shutterstock.com/image-photo/anxious-teenage-student-sitting-examination-school-769528084">Monkey Business Images/shutterstock</a></span></figcaption></figure><p>Student performance matters. Students who perform well have better health, earn a larger income and contribute more to <a href="https://www.oecd-ilibrary.org/education/education-at-a-glance-2019_f8d7880d-en">society</a> than those who perform poorly. </p>
<p>As a consequence, psychologists, teachers and even parents have spent a great deal of time and effort trying to understand what makes or breaks success. Personality factors that explain how people differ may be extremely important in this regard. One prominent trait that has long been tied to performance is <a href="https://oxfordre.com/psychology/view/10.1093/acrefore/9780190236557.001.0001/acrefore-9780190236557-e-166">perfectionism</a>. Perfectionists place irrational significance on achieving their excessive standards, struggle with failure and criticism, and may feel the need to be the best at everything they do.</p>
<p>In a new <a href="https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s10648-019-09484-2">study</a> of nearly 10,000 students aged 12-21, I found that perfectionism predicted better academic achievement. Perfectionists outperformed their non-perfectionist counterparts in exams, received better grades and had higher grade-point averages. This greater performance persisted through school, college and university.</p>
<p>Not only may perfectionism increase performance, recent <a href="https://psycnet.apa.org/record/2017-57603-001">evidence</a> suggests that the number of students considered perfectionists is increasing – and has been rising for the last three decades. </p>
<h2>The high price of perfect</h2>
<p>This may all sounds like positive news. But perfectionists can pay a high price for their greater performance. This is because perfectionists view anything short of perfect as unacceptable – and when perfectionists make mistakes, fail exams or receive critical feedback, they experience <a href="https://theconversation.com/perfectionism-and-burn-out-are-close-friends-best-avoid-them-44727">significant psychological distress</a>. This includes stress, <a href="https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/full/10.1177/1088868315596286">burnout</a> and <a href="https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/full/10.1002/jclp.22435">depression</a>. It may also partly explain why students more generally experience much <a href="https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0022395612003573">higher rates</a> of depression than the general population.</p>
<p>These issues can become particularly problematic during the transition from one stage of education to the <a href="https://psycnet.apa.org/record/2014-02838-003">next</a>. For example, when a student leaves college and begins to study at university. Here, they are not only faced with a huge number of new stressors but possibly also worse performance. These issues may even persist beyond education and into the workplace. </p>
<h2>What parents and teachers can do</h2>
<p>So before parents and educators are tempted to promote perfectionism, they must be aware that its performance <a href="https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s10648-019-09484-2">benefits</a> will come at a much greater cost when things go wrong.</p>
<p>One thing that may be helpful in these situations is to better recognise perfectionist characteristics. <a href="https://psycnet.apa.org/record/1992-03887-001">Perfectionism</a> is a combination of excessively high standards: “I demand nothing less than perfection of myself,” and overly critical evaluations of performance: “It makes me uneasy to see an error in my work.” Perfectionist students are also rigid in their need for success: “I must always be successful at school.” </p>
<figure class="align-center ">
<img alt="" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/307931/original/file-20191219-11909-mo6gxn.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/307931/original/file-20191219-11909-mo6gxn.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/307931/original/file-20191219-11909-mo6gxn.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/307931/original/file-20191219-11909-mo6gxn.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/307931/original/file-20191219-11909-mo6gxn.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/307931/original/file-20191219-11909-mo6gxn.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/307931/original/file-20191219-11909-mo6gxn.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px">
<figcaption>
<span class="caption">Teachers should be aware of which students are prone to perfectionistic tendencies.</span>
<span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://www.shutterstock.com/image-photo/soft-focus-back-view-abstract-background-693705529">panitanphoto/Shutterstock</a></span>
</figcaption>
</figure>
<p>By being aware of these characteristics, parents and teachers can more easily identify and highlight the differences between reasonable, achievable standards and excessive, perfectionist standards. And students can instead be taught to strive for more appropriate standards. </p>
<p>Of course, there’s nothing wrong with high standards. But a focus on more realistic and less irrational performance outcomes will help students cope when things don’t go to plan. And by encouraging realistic expectations, both parents and teachers can help students to better accept their imperfections.</p><img src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/126558/count.gif" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" />
<p class="fine-print"><em><span>Daniel Madigan does not work for, consult, own shares in or receive funding from any company or organisation that would benefit from this article, and has disclosed no relevant affiliations beyond their academic appointment.</span></em></p>A focus on more realistic performance outcomes can help students cope when things do not go to plan.Daniel Madigan, Senior Lecturer in Sport and Exercise Psychology, York St John UniversityLicensed as Creative Commons – attribution, no derivatives.tag:theconversation.com,2011:article/1117312019-03-24T13:21:59Z2019-03-24T13:21:59ZUnrealistic striving for academic excellence has a cost<figure><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/265443/original/file-20190323-36264-skcwxz.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=496&fit=clip" /><figcaption><span class="caption">Skills of well-being have been forgotten partly due to a combination of educational reforms and
societal pressures. </span> <span class="attribution"><span class="source">Unsplash/Oscar Chevillard</span>, <a class="license" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/4.0/">CC BY-SA</a></span></figcaption></figure><p>In my past experience as an academic adviser, it was difficult to explain to a disappointed family why their child did not make an admissions cut-off when the student’s overall high school average was over 80 per cent. </p>
<p>I also accompanied students who got into their programs of choice through the many hurdles they faced as a result of feeling pressured to perform and sustain high academic achievement throughout their college years. </p>
<p>Now, as an assistant professor in the department of pedagogy at the University of Sherbrooke, I see the experiences of those who carry the burden of maintaining high grades. </p>
<p>For example, one student recently told me that the 80 per cent she received on an assignment was hard to swallow. Was there anything that could be done to change the score? </p>
<p>This student also expressed serious concern whether the 80 per cent would result in an A+ or an A as a final grade. I assured her she was progressing very well in the course. </p>
<p>This example is one of many I have encountered that has prompted me to think further about how today’s youth perceive their own academic abilities, and how <a href="https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/10.1177/0162353217701020?journalCode=jegb#abstract">student tenacity</a> and perception directly affects expectations, learning and achievement.</p>
<p>It is not surprising nowadays to find students frustrated or in tears after <a href="https://chroniclevitae.com/news/908-dear-student-no-i-won-t-change-the-grade-you-deserve">receiving a grade less than A</a>. </p>
<p>In some ways, it could be considered motivating to see today’s youth striving to achieve high grades. But from my point of view as a specialist <a href="https://www.researchgate.net/publication/321107502_Positive_psychology_meets_education_in_the_context_of_passion_for_sports_Implications_for_sports-study_programs">in educational psychology</a>, there are reasons to be concerned. It’s clear there are incremental risks associated with students developing obsessive behaviour toward performance, especially when persisting in an academic task with limited self-control. </p>
<h2>Unhealthy persistence</h2>
<p>A recent provincewide survey by the Institut de la statistique du Québec that polled 62,000 high-schoolers <a href="https://montrealgazette.com/news/local-news/more-quebec-high-schoolers-reporting-anxiety-learning-challenges-study">showed a significant increase in students’ reported anxiety</a>: In 2016-2017, 17 per cent of students reported anxiety compared with nine per cent in 2010-2011.</p>
<p>A similar report by Université de Montréal’s School of Psychoeducation about mental health among college and university students indicated <a href="https://nouvelles.umontreal.ca/en/article/2017/08/30/academic-success-a-little-anxiety-may-help/">the primary cause of anxiety is pressure to succeed</a>. </p>
<figure class="align-left ">
<img alt="" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/265444/original/file-20190323-36276-l1vr5x.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=237&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/265444/original/file-20190323-36276-l1vr5x.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=900&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/265444/original/file-20190323-36276-l1vr5x.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=900&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/265444/original/file-20190323-36276-l1vr5x.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=900&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/265444/original/file-20190323-36276-l1vr5x.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=1131&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/265444/original/file-20190323-36276-l1vr5x.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=1131&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/265444/original/file-20190323-36276-l1vr5x.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=1131&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px">
<figcaption>
<span class="caption">How can educators foster a flexible approach to persistence?</span>
<span class="attribution"><span class="source">(Unsplash/ Ksenia Makagonova)</span>, <a class="license" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/">CC BY</a></span>
</figcaption>
</figure>
<p>In Québec, particularly, high school students transitioning to <a href="https://www.sram.qc.ca/international-student/what-are-cegeps">CEGEP</a> are faced with a performance measure referred to as the <a href="https://www.bci-qc.ca/wp-content/uploads/2017/09/03-R_Score_what-it-is_what-it-does_BCI-july12-2017.pdf">R-score</a>. A new calculation method was <a href="https://www.bci-qc.ca/wp-content/uploads/2017/09/01-RScore-Changes-for-the-Fall2017-Semester-ENG-June16-2017.pdf">introduced for the score in 2017</a>. This assessment takes into account students’ individual grades, the class average (and standard deviation) and the group’s strength determined by the high school grades of the students in the course. </p>
<p>With this calculation, it also means that even with a 100 per cent, a student’s R score can only reach to a certain limit which will never be a perfect score. This type of grading leads to many implications for academic, <a href="https://uk.sagepub.com/en-gb/eur/the-sage-handbook-of-gifted-and-talented-education/book258590#contents">social</a> and psychological well-being. </p>
<p>This scoring method is not only conducive to animosity, stress and hostility among peers, it also dampens conditions for optimal learning.</p>
<p>Perceptions of what it means to be a <a href="https://www.researchgate.net/publication/263046816_Cognitive_Characteristics_of_the_Gifted_Reconceptualized_in_the_Context_of_Inquiry_Learning_and_Teaching">high achiever</a> may vary across individuals or contexts and may be costly, especially if a person’s ideal resembles perfection. </p>
<h2>Obsessive behaviours</h2>
<p>In today’s social and academic landscape, it’s become commonplace to hear that in achieving excellence, <a href="https://ac.els-cdn.com/S1041608012001963/1-s2.0-S1041608012001963-main.pdf?_tid=dc4cc0fb-41eb-4ac8-8b33-e59fd535f4f1&acdnat=1552678428_96d543631d0a55e9bc62dacb1312c604">passion and persistence</a> must be pursued. But problems arise after students hear people say:</p>
<blockquote>
<p>“Without passion everything is done with only half a heart and it will produce only half results. So unless you have a strong desire to achieve your goal, you will never be able to achieve excellence in it.” </p>
</blockquote>
<p>Suddenly the 80 per cent that students were obtaining in a course they enjoyed slowly begins to be replaced by a persistent cognitive effort to maintain even higher performance levels. This can lead to potentially obsessive behaviours and is fertile grounds for a culture of grade inflation to prevail.</p>
<p>When grades are associated with efforts or how well one has mastered content as opposed to demonstrating skills related to critical thinking, <a href="https://www.igi-global.com/chapter/inquiring-minds-undergraduate-instruction/75495">inquiry</a> or other forms of high-order thinking, an unhealthy persistence surfaces. This is detrimental to students’ well-being.</p>
<p>Although the pursuit of academic excellence should be supported, nurtured and promoted, it should be carefully monitored for veering into perfectionism and its consequent risks.</p>
<hr>
<p>
<em>
<strong>
Read more:
<a href="https://theconversation.com/how-perfectionism-became-a-hidden-epidemic-among-young-people-89405">How perfectionism became a hidden epidemic among young people</a>
</strong>
</em>
</p>
<hr>
<h2>Injecting positivity in education</h2>
<p>Over the years, a combination of educational reforms, paradigm shifts in pedagogy and societal pressure have created a culture of students whose self-efficacy is so reliant on their academic self-concept that <a href="https://www.jstor.org/stable/pdf/27784563.pdf">skills of well-being have long been forgotten.</a></p>
<p>For example, students who are not successful at a task immediately might develop a rigid way of persisting, one that leads to sacrifices at personal costs. This is particularly true in performance-based classrooms where traditional testing — measuring “Do you know it?” — is complemented by a performance assessment. The latter seeks to gauge: “How well can you use what you know?” </p>
<p>Performance-based assessments are <a href="https://www.edutopia.org/blog/performance-based-assessment-reviewing-basics-patricia-hilliard">complex, authentic, and open-ended and can be either process- or product-oriented</a>. They tend to measure students’ ability to apply their knowledge by challenging them to use <a href="http://jcsites.juniata.edu/faculty/kruse/misc/Chun_Change_TakingTeachingToTask.pdf">higher-order thinking skills</a> and presenting them with open-ended questions that may produce a variety of correct answers. The transition from testing traditional to applied knowledge affects students’ academic persistence differently.</p>
<p>Thus, a central question remains: How do educators prevent youth from developing obsessive behaviour toward performance? How do we address this rising epidemic that has plagued the mindsets of today’s youth regarding their academic self-concept?</p>
<p>One possibility is to begin looking for answers through the lens of <a href="https://www.jstor.org/stable/pdf/27542354.pdf">positive psychology in education</a>. This field investigates indicators of what enables students to thrive and flourish in educational settings. It looks for the potential to change the way students think about themselves and to focus more on the process of achievement rather than the outcome.</p>
<p>The challenge now becomes how to foster a flexible approach to persistence for future generation youth to thrive, flourish and <a href="https://www.excelatlife.com/articles/excellence.htm">strive for excellence</a>, without neglecting their well-being.</p>
<p><em>This is a corrected version of a story originally published on March 24, 2019. The earlier story said the R score is new instead of saying that a new calculation method for the R score was introduced in 2017.</em></p><img src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/111731/count.gif" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" />
<p class="fine-print"><em><span>Tanya Chichekian receives funding from Social Sciences and Humanities Research Council. </span></em></p>A specialist in educational psychology says there are incremental risks associated with students developing an obsessive behaviour toward performance.Tanya Chichekian, Assistant Professor, Department of Pedagogy, Université de Sherbrooke Licensed as Creative Commons – attribution, no derivatives.tag:theconversation.com,2011:article/1103432019-02-05T22:18:59Z2019-02-05T22:18:59ZYoung people drowning in a rising tide of perfectionism<figure><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/257299/original/file-20190205-86210-2841yj.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=496&fit=clip" /><figcaption><span class="caption">Perfectionism often develops in childhood, is impacted by parenting and can lead to mental health struggles in later life. </span> <span class="attribution"><span class="source">(Shutterstock)</span></span></figcaption></figure><p><a href="https://doi.org/10.1177/1088868318814973">We recently conducted one of the largest-ever studies on perfectionism</a>. We learned that perfectionism has increased substantially over the past 25 years and that it affects men and women equally. </p>
<p>We also learned that perfectionists become more neurotic and less conscientious as time passes. </p>
<p>Perfectionism involves striving for flawlessness and requiring perfection of oneself and others. Extremely negative reactions to mistakes, harsh self-criticism, nagging doubt about performance abilities and a strong sense that others are critical and demanding also define the trait.</p>
<p>As a <a href="https://www.dal.ca/faculty/science/psychology_neuroscience/faculty-staff/our-faculty/simon-sherry.html">clinical psychologist</a> in the department of psychology and neuroscience at Dalhousie University and a <a href="https://www.yorksj.ac.uk/schools/sport/staff-profiles/dr-martin-smith/">lecturer in research methods</a> at York St John University, together we have extensive experience in understanding, assessing, treating and studying perfectionism. </p>
<p>We are greatly troubled by what we see.</p>
<p>We believe there is an urgent need for prevention efforts — to reduce the <a href="http://dx.doi.org/10.1037/0893-3200.19.3.358">harsh and controlling parenting practices</a> and socio-cultural influences, such as <a href="https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s11199-014-0384-6">unrealistic media images</a>, that contribute to perfectionism. Interventions for distressed perfectionists are also clearly needed.</p>
<h2>Millennials are suffering</h2>
<p>To gain a more complete understanding of perfectionism, we conducted a large-scale meta-analysis involving 77 studies and nearly 25,000 participants. Around two thirds of these participants were female and many were Caucasian university students from western nations (such as Canada, the United States and the United Kingdom). Our participants ranged in age from 15 to 49. </p>
<p>We found today’s young people are more perfectionist than ever before. In fact, we found perfectionism has increased substantially since 1990. This means millennials struggle with perfectionism more than previous generations — <a href="http://dx.doi.org/10.1037/bul0000138">a finding that mirrors past research</a>.</p>
<figure class="align-center ">
<img alt="" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/257311/original/file-20190205-86210-15igfcl.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/257311/original/file-20190205-86210-15igfcl.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/257311/original/file-20190205-86210-15igfcl.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/257311/original/file-20190205-86210-15igfcl.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/257311/original/file-20190205-86210-15igfcl.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/257311/original/file-20190205-86210-15igfcl.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/257311/original/file-20190205-86210-15igfcl.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px">
<figcaption>
<span class="caption">The constant push to succeed can be exhausting and dangerous.</span>
<span class="attribution"><span class="source">(Unsplash/Alora Griffiths)</span>, <a class="license" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/">CC BY</a></span>
</figcaption>
</figure>
<p>The causes of perfectionism are complex. Increases in perfectionism come, at least in part, from today’s dog-eat-dog world, where rank and performance count excessively and winning and self-interest are emphasized. </p>
<p>Controlling and critical parents also hover too close in raising their children, which <a href="https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/to-your-health/wp/2016/06/27/dear-tiger-mom-your-perfectionist-parenting-style-may-be-detrimental-to-your-child/?utm_term=.706f2d8825c7">fosters perfectionism’s development</a>. With social media posts showcasing unrealistically “perfect” lives and glossy advertisements depicting unobtainable standards of perfection, millennials are surrounded by too many yardsticks upon which to measure their success and failure. Keeping up with the Joneses has never been harder.</p>
<hr>
<p>
<em>
<strong>
Read more:
<a href="https://theconversation.com/fairy-tale-social-media-fantasies-can-demolish-your-confidence-but-its-not-all-bad-109216">Fairy-tale social media fantasies can demolish your confidence, but it's not all bad</a>
</strong>
</em>
</p>
<hr>
<p>This epidemic of perfectionism in modern western societies is a serious, even deadly, problem. Perfectionism is robustly linked in the research to <a href="https://doi.org/10.1080/10615806.2017.1384466">anxiety</a>, <a href="http://dx.doi.org/10.1016/j.paid.2017.01.031">stress</a>, <a href="https://doi.org/10.1002/per.2053">depression</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/perfectionists-more-likely-to-develop-bulimia-new-research-104746">eating disorders</a> and <a href="https://doi.org/10.1111/jopy.12333">suicide</a>.</p>
<h2>As perfectionists age, they unravel</h2>
<p>We also found that, as perfectionists grow older, they appear to unravel. Their personalities become more neurotic (more prone to negative emotions like guilt, envy and anxiety) and less conscientious (less organized, efficient, reliable and disciplined). </p>
<p>Pursuing perfection — a goal that is intangible, fleeting and rare — may result in a higher rate of failures and a lower rate of successes that leaves perfectionists more likely to neurotically stew about their imperfections and less likely to conscientiously pursue their goals. </p>
<p>Overall, then, our results suggest life does not get easier for perfectionists. In a challenging, messy and imperfect world, <a href="https://doi.org/10.1177/1088868315596286">perfectionists may burn out</a> as they age, leaving them more unstable and less diligent.</p>
<p>Our findings also revealed men and women report similar levels of perfectionism.</p>
<figure class="align-center ">
<img alt="" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/257314/original/file-20190205-86198-16u6zbe.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/257314/original/file-20190205-86198-16u6zbe.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/257314/original/file-20190205-86198-16u6zbe.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/257314/original/file-20190205-86198-16u6zbe.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/257314/original/file-20190205-86198-16u6zbe.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/257314/original/file-20190205-86198-16u6zbe.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/257314/original/file-20190205-86198-16u6zbe.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px">
<figcaption>
<span class="caption">The tendency to stew neurotically over our failures increases as we age.</span>
<span class="attribution"><span class="source">(Shutterstock)</span></span>
</figcaption>
</figure>
<p>This suggests modern western societies do not involve gender-specific pressure to be perfect. Gender roles appear to allow (or to encourage) both men and women to strive for perfection. </p>
<p>Future research should test if men strive for perfection based more on achievement motives (such as competing for resources) and women strive for perfection based more on relationship motives (such as pleasing other people).</p>
<h2>Unconditional love is an antidote</h2>
<p>Perfectionism is a major, <a href="https://doi.org/10.1177/1359105309103571">deadly epidemic in modern western societies</a> that is seriously under-recognized, with many distressed perfectionists <a href="https://doi.org/10.1177/0829573512468845">concealing their imperfections</a> from those who might be able to help (such as psychologists, teachers or family doctors).</p>
<p>We need to respond to the perfectionism epidemic at the parental and the cultural level. </p>
<figure class="align-center ">
<img alt="" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/257315/original/file-20190205-86202-1r4zssh.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/257315/original/file-20190205-86202-1r4zssh.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/257315/original/file-20190205-86202-1r4zssh.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/257315/original/file-20190205-86202-1r4zssh.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/257315/original/file-20190205-86202-1r4zssh.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/257315/original/file-20190205-86202-1r4zssh.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/257315/original/file-20190205-86202-1r4zssh.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px">
<figcaption>
<span class="caption">Valuing children for who they are can free them from later anxiety.</span>
<span class="attribution"><span class="source">(Unsplash/Caroline Hernandez)</span>, <a class="license" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/">CC BY</a></span>
</figcaption>
</figure>
<p>Parents need to be less controlling, critical and overprotective of their children — teaching their children to tolerate and to learn from their mistakes while emphasizing hard work and discipline over the unrealistic pursuit of perfection.</p>
<p>Unconditional love — where parents value children for more than their performance, rank or appearance — seems as good an antidote to perfectionism as any.</p>
<p>Perfectionism is a myth and social media is its storyteller. We need to teach a healthy skepticism toward the suspiciously “perfect” lives promoted through social media posts and mainstream media advertisements. Unrealistic images achieved through photo-shopping, airbrushing and filters are less compelling once you learn the game is rigged.</p><img src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/110343/count.gif" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" />
<p class="fine-print"><em><span>Dr. Simon Sherry receives funding from the Social Sciences and Humanities Research Council of Canada. He owns CRUX Psychology, a private practice in clinical psychology.</span></em></p><p class="fine-print"><em><span>Martin M. Smith does not work for, consult, own shares in or receive funding from any company or organisation that would benefit from this article, and has disclosed no relevant affiliations beyond their academic appointment.</span></em></p>New research shows that perfectionism has increased dramatically over the last 25 years, and that perfectionists become more neurotic and less conscientious as time passes.Simon Sherry, Clinical Psychologist and Professor in the Department of Psychology and Neuroscience, Dalhousie UniversityMartin M. Smith, Lecturer in Research Methods, York St John UniversityLicensed as Creative Commons – attribution, no derivatives.tag:theconversation.com,2011:article/1047462018-11-01T21:32:13Z2018-11-01T21:32:13ZPerfectionists more likely to develop bulimia: New research<figure><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/243082/original/file-20181030-76411-1yobszz.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=496&fit=clip" /><figcaption><span class="caption">Perfectionists are rarely satisfied with their performance or appearance and engage in harsh self-criticism when their efforts fall short. Perfectionists are also more likely to develop the eating disorder bulimia nervosa, according to new research.</span> <span class="attribution"><span class="source">(Shutterstock)</span></span></figcaption></figure><p>Bulimia nervosa is a common and life-threatening eating disorder. About 275,000 Canadian girls and women will <a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5757497/">have bulimia at some point in their lives</a>. They will <a href="https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/bulimia/symptoms-causes/syc-20353615">eat large amounts of food, often secretly, and then prevent weight gain</a> by vomiting, fasting or exercise. </p>
<p>Most sufferers of bulimia are female. About two per cent of them die every decade. And around a fifth of those deaths about <a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/22644309">are due to suicide</a>. Uncovering the multiple factors leading to bulimia nervosa is therefore very important, especially as the causes are largely unknown.</p>
<p>As a professor in Dalhousie University’s department of psychology and neuroscience, <a href="https://www.dal.ca/faculty/science/psychology_neuroscience/faculty-staff/our-faculty/simon-sherry.html">I research personality traits and eating disorders</a>. As a clinical psychologist, I also assess and treat eating disorders and associated problems, including perfectionism.</p>
<p>My lab just published the most complete <a href="https://doi.org/10.1016/j.paid.2018.09.022">research study</a> investigating the link between the personality trait of perfectionism and bulimia nervosa to date. Our results clearly show perfectionists have higher odds of developing bulimia and are at greater risk for developing the disease as time passes. </p>
<p>Building on this research, therapists may be able to improve treatments for some bulimic clients by focusing on their underlying perfectionism as well as their symptoms. </p>
<h2>Harsh self-criticism</h2>
<p>Perfectionism involves striving relentlessly for flawlessness and holding unrealistically high standards for oneself and others. </p>
<p>Perfectionists are rarely satisfied with their performance and <a href="https://www.guilford.com/books/Perfectionism/Hewitt-Flett-Mikail/9781462528721/authors">engage in harsh self-criticism when their efforts fall short of perfection</a>.</p>
<figure class="align-center ">
<img alt="" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/243083/original/file-20181030-76390-1mx9e24.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/243083/original/file-20181030-76390-1mx9e24.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/243083/original/file-20181030-76390-1mx9e24.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/243083/original/file-20181030-76390-1mx9e24.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/243083/original/file-20181030-76390-1mx9e24.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/243083/original/file-20181030-76390-1mx9e24.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/243083/original/file-20181030-76390-1mx9e24.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px">
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<span class="caption">Perfectionism is linked to relationship problems, disconnection and sadness.</span>
<span class="attribution"><span class="source">(Shutterstock)</span></span>
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<p>To get a more comprehensive picture of whether perfectionism leads people to develop bulimia nervosa, we conducted a thorough literature search that identified 12 longitudinal studies involving a total of 4,665 participants. </p>
<p>We then analyzed results from these 12 studies using statistical means. Most of our participants were female (86.8 per cent) and included adolescents, undergraduates and adults from the community, with an average age of 19 years.</p>
<p>We showed perfectionism predicted increases in bulimia nervosa, even after controlling for baseline levels of the condition. This suggests perfectionists are at risk for developing more bulimia nervosa as time passes. </p>
<p>In fact, our results indicate perfectionism is centrally important to the personality of people who go on to develop bulimia.</p>
<p>Previous research has already shown that external pressure from family, friends and media can contribute to the disease by <a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/11835293">fostering a desire to attain an “ideal” weight and shape</a>. But the link between perfectionism and bulimia has never before been extensively explored.</p>
<h2>A dog-eat-dog world</h2>
<p>Perfectionism is linked with <a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/22353007">relationship problems and feeling sad</a>. Perfectionists may turn to food to cope with sadness brought on by their lack of connection to other people. </p>
<p>Symptoms of bulimia (e.g., binge eating) may also offer perfectionists a <a href="http://dx.doi.org/10.1037/a0037939">temporary escape from pressure and self-criticism</a>.</p>
<p>It’s a dog-eat-dog world today. We have controlling and hyper-competitive helicopter parents. And in society at large, <a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/29283599">self-interest and winning are emphasized</a>. Rank and performance matter more than ever. These are conditions where perfectionism is likely to develop. So, we may see more and more perfectionism-linked cases of bulimia nervosa emerge.</p>
<p>Our results suggest treating perfectionism as early as possible may help to stop the development of bulimia nervosa. It is time to go beyond entirely symptom-focused treatments. Building on our research, clinicians may want to assess and to treat both bulimic symptoms (e.g., vomiting) and underlying perfectionism (e.g., self-criticism).</p>
<p>Bulimia nervosa usually <a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/16791852">lasts for more than eight years before symptoms go away</a>. About 25 per cent of people with the condition develop <a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/19884225">chronic, hard-to-treat symptoms that last for many years</a>. And <a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6034764/">affected people often develop other problems</a> such as tooth decay and depression. </p>
<p>Clearly, more research is needed to understand and defeat this disease.</p><img src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/104746/count.gif" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" />
<p class="fine-print"><em><span>Simon B. Sherry receives funding from the Social Sciences and Humanities Research Council of Canada. He owns CRUX Psychology, a private practice in clinical psychology. </span></em></p>Perfectionists have a higher chance of developing bulimia nervosa. Rather than treating symptoms of binge eating and vomiting, therapists should address this underlying personality trait.Simon Sherry, Clinical Psychologist and Professor in the Department of Psychology and Neuroscience, Dalhousie UniversityLicensed as Creative Commons – attribution, no derivatives.tag:theconversation.com,2011:article/1037532018-09-24T20:14:27Z2018-09-24T20:14:27ZArt and science come together to examine the power and perversions of perfection<figure><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/237635/original/file-20180924-117383-6zwd9u.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=496&fit=clip" /><figcaption><span class="caption">Patricia Piccinini, Graham, 2016 Installation view, </span> <span class="attribution"><span class="source">Nicole Cleary</span></span></figcaption></figure><p><em>Review: Perfection, Science Gallery Melbourne.</em></p>
<hr>
<p>It would be easy to assume that art and science occupy separate worlds. Art <a href="https://warwick.ac.uk/fac/arts/english/currentstudents/undergraduate/modules/fulllist/first/en122/lecturelist-2015-16-2/shklovsky.pdf">invites</a> us to encounter “things as they are perceived and not as they are known” and relies on subjective experience to confirm value. Science strives to establish knowledge as fact through testing and peer review. Yet sitting at the core of both disciplines is the desire to employ curiosity, creativity, innovation and discovery to examine the world we live in. These intellectual frameworks create bridges between the two disciplines.</p>
<p>The intersection between art and science is the focus of <a href="https://perfection.sciencegallery.com/">Perfection</a>, the latest pop-up show for the Science Gallery Melbourne. Part exhibition, part experiment it asks: “What does it mean to be perfect?”</p>
<p>Curated by a panel that includes a particle physicist, a computer scientist, a plastic surgeon and a musicologist, Perfection offers a set of reflections, calculations and speculations that engage with ideas about the perfect body, mathematical precision, quantum physics and a post-human world. We are invited to consider the current state of things and to contemplate what might constitute an ideal future.</p>
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Read more:
<a href="https://theconversation.com/spilling-blood-in-art-a-tale-of-tampons-trump-and-taboos-81455">Spilling blood in art, a tale of tampons, Trump and taboos</a>
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<a href="https://images.theconversation.com/files/237640/original/file-20180924-129862-kwwhv2.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=1000&fit=clip"><img alt="" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/237640/original/file-20180924-129862-kwwhv2.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/237640/original/file-20180924-129862-kwwhv2.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=626&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/237640/original/file-20180924-129862-kwwhv2.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=626&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/237640/original/file-20180924-129862-kwwhv2.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=626&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/237640/original/file-20180924-129862-kwwhv2.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=786&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/237640/original/file-20180924-129862-kwwhv2.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=786&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/237640/original/file-20180924-129862-kwwhv2.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=786&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px"></a>
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<span class="caption">XORXOR, Perfect O, installation view.</span>
<span class="attribution"><span class="source">Image courtesy of the artists</span></span>
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</figure>
<p>The slippages between art and science, and experiment and exhibition, are an active component of Perfection. Questions that straddle technology and art history are explored by XORXOR’s question: “Is it possible to draw a perfect circle?”</p>
<figure class="align-center ">
<img alt="" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/237641/original/file-20180924-129862-2uxxq4.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/237641/original/file-20180924-129862-2uxxq4.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=600&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/237641/original/file-20180924-129862-2uxxq4.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=600&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/237641/original/file-20180924-129862-2uxxq4.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=600&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/237641/original/file-20180924-129862-2uxxq4.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=754&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/237641/original/file-20180924-129862-2uxxq4.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=754&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/237641/original/file-20180924-129862-2uxxq4.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=754&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px">
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<span class="caption">Marcus Volz, Lorenz Attractor 201, Digital animation.</span>
<span class="attribution"><span class="source">Image courtesy the artist</span></span>
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</figure>
<p>Marcus Volz’s digital animations, Lorenz Attractor and Natalina Cafra, employ complex 3D sculptural forms to visualise mathematical equations relating to atmospheric weather patterns and fractal diversity in molluscs. Reminiscent of late modernism and the idea of a perfect closed self-referencing system, these drawings ask whether art can be maths and maths can be art.</p>
<p>The lab-like conditions of Andy Gracie’s Fish, Plant, Rack v.2 speculate on a future post-human condition where the world goes on without us. In this experiment three systems interact: a blind fish emitting electrical impulses, a robot powered by the fish, and plants living in a hydroponic system. Other works that deal with non-human concerns explore ideas about a “perfect sound” and question whether light has consciousness. </p>
<p>The most prominent experiments in the exhibition, though, relate to the human body, identity and the self.</p>
<p>Throughout history, the body has been an abiding interest for artists — from the earliest forms of bodily adornment through Da Vinci’s concern with anatomy, to contemporary explorations of race, gender and sexuality. Technology takes things to a new level, enabling us to hack, modify and transform our bodies, and to use social media as a platform to manage our identity and present it to the world. As a potential extension of the body, the digital realm provides fertile ground for creative critique and exploration.</p>
<figure class="align-center zoomable">
<a href="https://images.theconversation.com/files/237639/original/file-20180924-88806-bmwij1.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=1000&fit=clip"><img alt="" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/237639/original/file-20180924-88806-bmwij1.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/237639/original/file-20180924-88806-bmwij1.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/237639/original/file-20180924-88806-bmwij1.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/237639/original/file-20180924-88806-bmwij1.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/237639/original/file-20180924-88806-bmwij1.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/237639/original/file-20180924-88806-bmwij1.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/237639/original/file-20180924-88806-bmwij1.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px"></a>
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<span class="caption">Ant Hamlyn, The Boost Project, 2015.</span>
<span class="attribution"><span class="source">Nicole Cleary</span></span>
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<p>Ant Hamlyn’s The Boost Project and Tyler Payne’s Womanhours both address the pressures of social media. </p>
<p>Hamlyn’s six-metre-tall inflatable is a proxy for the body and the ego. Suspended from the ceiling, this giant orb gives form to the flux and fragility of an online presence. Each time it is liked via its <a href="https://twitter.com/hashtag/theboostproject">hashtag</a>, The Boost Project gets a 30-second burst of air. On a good day it has a substantial presence at the entrance of the gallery, but when it is ignored the orb slowly deflates, its firmness diminishes, and the suspended form takes on a droopy and dejected demeanour.</p>
<p>Payne’s Womanhours demonstrates the oppression of Instagram. In a series of videos, the artist employs her own body to reveal the level of self-correction needed to achieve the perfect self-portrait. She appears to endure an extreme physical and psychological makeover through female cosmetic rituals such as waxing, tanning, bleaching, plucking and shaving. The perfected self is captured for a fleeting moment in the virtual realm and the ritual is repeated all over again.</p>
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<a href="https://images.theconversation.com/files/237644/original/file-20180924-170656-1lb9yxr.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=1000&fit=clip"><img alt="" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/237644/original/file-20180924-170656-1lb9yxr.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/237644/original/file-20180924-170656-1lb9yxr.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=936&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/237644/original/file-20180924-170656-1lb9yxr.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=936&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/237644/original/file-20180924-170656-1lb9yxr.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=936&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/237644/original/file-20180924-170656-1lb9yxr.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=1176&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/237644/original/file-20180924-170656-1lb9yxr.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=1176&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/237644/original/file-20180924-170656-1lb9yxr.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=1176&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px"></a>
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<span class="caption">Orlan, Omniprésence, 1993.</span>
<span class="attribution"><span class="source">Image courtesy of the artist</span></span>
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<p>Self-correction is also the subject of <a href="http://www.orlan.eu/">ORLAN</a>’s performance practice and her body is the canvas for experimentation. No need to repeat these rituals; the interventions are permanent. For decades, ORLAN has undergone plastic surgery in order to shape her face to reflect a version of beauty expressed in the Renaissance paintings. Her new brow resembles the Mona Lisa and her chin belongs to Botticelli’s Venus.</p>
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<a href="https://images.theconversation.com/files/237636/original/file-20180924-129853-qxnduz.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=1000&fit=clip"><img alt="" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/237636/original/file-20180924-129853-qxnduz.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/237636/original/file-20180924-129853-qxnduz.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/237636/original/file-20180924-129853-qxnduz.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/237636/original/file-20180924-129853-qxnduz.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/237636/original/file-20180924-129853-qxnduz.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/237636/original/file-20180924-129853-qxnduz.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/237636/original/file-20180924-129853-qxnduz.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px"></a>
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<span class="caption">Adam Peacock, Genetics Gym, 2017, video still.</span>
<span class="attribution"><span class="source">Nicole Cleary</span></span>
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</figure>
<p>In Genetics Gym, Adam Peacock speculates on how genetic technologies could allow us to design our bodies and cognitive dispositions, ramping up the prospects of self-improvement beyond internal and external modification. </p>
<p>Similarly, in Demiurge, Jaden Hastings has accessed her entire gene sequence and used artificial intelligence to analyse potential risks and provide information about what needs to be fixed to achieve a perfect state. In doing so, the artist inserts the machine into the process of human evolution.</p>
<p>Most artists in this exhibition speculate on self-improvement with respect to health, function and beauty, but we might also be driven to modify ourselves through fear. What if the desire to survive a cataclysmic event was the catalyst for reshaping the human form? </p>
<p>Patricia Piccini’s Graham has the perfect body to walk away unscathed from a car crash. Created in collaboration with trauma surgeon Christian Kenfield and the Monash University Accident Research Centre, Graham’s honed and sculpted anatomy will withstand the impact of a 30kph collision. Paradoxically, the unintended consequences of Graham’s modified feet and ankles would appear to make walking very difficult.</p>
<p>Few of us would choose to look like Graham, but he is a metaphor for the lengths we will go to be safe. How far might we go to protect ourselves or our children from threats like terrorism or global warming?</p>
<p>The prospect of hacking, modifying and transforming our bodies presents an unexpected conundrum. Scientific and technological advances inevitably open up an unfettered realm of personal choice when innovations hit the marketplace. But in <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/10639.The_Paradox_of_Choice">The Paradox of Choice</a>, economist Barry Schwartz shows that having too many options generates anxiety. It’s hard enough to choose a toothbrush today, let alone make an informed decision about the potential range of future body modifications.</p>
<p>Perfection raises questions about what constitutes a utopian or dystopian future, ethical or unethical practices, a perfect or an imperfect human. The exhibition provides no easy answers but invites us to shift our perception and engage with the world as it is now, and as it might one day become. Be careful what you wish for.</p>
<hr>
<p><em><a href="https://melbourne.sciencegallery.com/perfection-part-experiment-part-exhibition">Perfection</a> is showing at Science Gallery Melbourne until November 3 2018.</em></p><img src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/103753/count.gif" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" />
<p class="fine-print"><em><span>Julie Shiels does not work for, consult, own shares in or receive funding from any company or organisation that would benefit from this article, and has disclosed no relevant affiliations beyond their academic appointment.</span></em></p>A new Science Gallery Melbourne exhibition offers a set of reflections, calculations and speculations that engage with ideas about the perfect body, mathematical precision, quantum physics and a post-human world.Julie Shiels, Lecturer - School of Art, RMIT UniversityLicensed as Creative Commons – attribution, no derivatives.tag:theconversation.com,2011:article/977192018-06-05T10:48:40Z2018-06-05T10:48:40ZHow perfectionism can lead to depression in students<figure><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/221513/original/file-20180604-175430-172ws0l.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=496&fit=clip" /><figcaption><span class="caption">shutterstock</span> </figcaption></figure><p>The pressures of young adulthood coupled with the demands of university leave undergraduates at risk for depressive symptoms. In fact, <a href="https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0022395612003573">nearly 30%</a> of undergraduates suffer from depressive symptoms, which is threefold higher than the general population. As such, researchers are increasingly interested in identifying factors that contribute to depressive symptoms to help curb the ever-increasing depression epidemic. Our <a href="https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0191886918302940">new study</a>, published in Personality and Individual Differences, focused on one such factor, perfectionism, and its depressing consequences. </p>
<p>Perfectionism refers to a tendency to doggedly strive for perfection and hold quixotically high standards. However perfectionism isn’t just about setting lofty goals and trying one’s best. On the contrary, perfectionism involves a tendency to feel that other people, such as parents and teachers, demand perfection. Perfectionists are inclined to believe that good enough is never enough. As such, the typical perfectionist is stuck in an endless loop of self-defeating and over-striving in which each new task is seen as an opportunity for failure, disappointment and harsh self-rebuke. So it is not surprising that <a href="https://pdfs.semanticscholar.org/b6ad/6f32c90beb8b2c2e6f3a0b698bd781bed0ba.pdf">ample evidence</a> implicates perfectionism in depressive symptoms. </p>
<figure class="align-center ">
<img alt="" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/221629/original/file-20180604-175425-v1uemz.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/221629/original/file-20180604-175425-v1uemz.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/221629/original/file-20180604-175425-v1uemz.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/221629/original/file-20180604-175425-v1uemz.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/221629/original/file-20180604-175425-v1uemz.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/221629/original/file-20180604-175425-v1uemz.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/221629/original/file-20180604-175425-v1uemz.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px">
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<span class="caption">Feeling the pressure.</span>
<span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://www.shutterstock.com/image-photo/man-thinking-everyday-stress-776933185?src=jKItMuRULSuxpN-U_a60Hw-1-72">Shutterstock</a></span>
</figcaption>
</figure>
<p>But why is perfectionism so widespread among undergraduates? University fosters optimal conditions for perfectionism to thrive and spread – whether in examinations or sporting trials, students are measured, evaluated and compared against each other. Such pressures are problematic for many students as it can lead to the perfectionistic belief that their value as a person depends on being perfect at everything they do. Indeed, <a href="http://psycnet.apa.org/record/2017-57603-001">evidence suggests</a> that the incidence of <a href="https://theconversation.com/how-perfectionism-became-a-hidden-epidemic-among-young-people-89405">perfectionism has skyrocketed</a> among UK and North American undergraduates over the past three decades.</p>
<h2>Social disconnection</h2>
<p>Longstanding theoretical accounts suggest that a key reason why perfectionism and depression go hand-in-hand is social disconnection. Social disconnection refers to a tendency to feel disliked and rejected by other people. However, the exact nature of the social disconnection experienced by perfectionists was unclear. </p>
<p>Our study addressed this by investigating two specific forms of social disconnection: interpersonal discrepancies (perceiving a gap between how you are and how other people want you to be) and social hopelessness (negative expectations concerning the success of future relationships). We looked at these alongside perfectionism and depressive symptoms in 127 undergraduates over five months. Undergraduates completed self-report measures of perfectionism and depressive symptoms at the start. Five months later, they returned to the lab and completed measures of social disconnection, perfectionism, and a follow-up measure of depressive symptoms. </p>
<p>Our findings revealed that perfectionism generated depressive symptoms in undergraduates because it caused students to feel like they were falling short of other peoples’ expectations (interpersonal discrepancies), which in turn caused negative expectations concerning future relationships (social hopelessness). </p>
<p>In other words, our results implied that perfectionism leads to a sense of ongoing disappointment and disapproval from others, which in turn triggers feelings that one’s future relationships will never improve and are doomed to fail. Feeling, that they will never belong, fit in, or feel comfortable around others, subsequently leaves perfectionist students depressed.</p><img src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/97719/count.gif" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" />
<p class="fine-print"><em><span>The authors do not work for, consult, own shares in or receive funding from any company or organisation that would benefit from this article, and have disclosed no relevant affiliations beyond their academic appointment.</span></em></p>Feeling that others are disappointed and disapprove of you and you must be perfect puts you at risk for depression.Marianne E. Etherson, Ph.D., PhD Candidate and Graduate Teaching Assistant, York St John UniversityMartin M. Smith, Lecturer in Research Methods, York St John UniversityLicensed as Creative Commons – attribution, no derivatives.tag:theconversation.com,2011:article/915352018-02-09T14:28:27Z2018-02-09T14:28:27ZSetting more exams to combat stress among school students is utterly absurd<figure><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/205690/original/file-20180209-51727-j0jf5m.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=496&fit=clip" /><figcaption><span class="caption">Omg I can't even. </span> <span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://www.shutterstock.com/image-photo/anxious-teenage-student-sitting-examination-school-769528084?src=-PAVCQoKF1VMWfvg6UPFfQ-1-9">Shutterstock.</a></span></figcaption></figure><p>Schools minister Nick Gibb <a href="https://www.thetimes.co.uk/article/sit-more-exams-to-beat-stress-schools-minister-nick-gibb-tells-gcse-pupils-63n02jt8d">reportedly advised MPs</a> that young people should face more frequent tests in secondary school, to better prepare them for the exam stress they experience by the time they take their GCSEs. This is a surprising and somewhat short-sighted approach – not unlike proposing more regular alcohol consumption as the solution to <a href="http://www.ias.org.uk/Alcohol-knowledge-centre/Young-people-and-alcohol.aspx">binge drinking</a>. </p>
<p>It is hard to understand what appears to be a blatant disregard for the mental health of children and young people on the part of the schools’ minister – especially given that <a href="https://www.gov.uk/government/uploads/system/uploads/attachment_data/file/508847/Mental_Health_and_Behaviour_-_advice_for_Schools_160316.pdf">this government</a> has <a href="https://www.gov.uk/government/publications/promoting-children-and-young-peoples-emotional-health-and-wellbeing">repeatedly called on</a> schools to play a larger role in addressing the purported mental health crisis among students. The prime minister herself <a href="https://www.gov.uk/government/news/prime-minister-unveils-plans-to-transform-mental-health-support">has called</a> for an end to the “hidden injustice” of mental illness that “too often starts in childhood and that when left untreated, can blight lives”. </p>
<h2>Stressed-out students</h2>
<p>To be clear, there is no doubt that exams contribute to mental health problems among young people. <a href="https://www.teachers.org.uk/files/exam-factories.pdf">A 2015 report</a> by the National Teachers Union concluded that:</p>
<blockquote>
<p>Children and young people are suffering from increasingly high levels of school-related anxiety and stress, disaffection and mental health problems. This is caused by increased pressure from tests/exams; greater awareness at younger ages of their own ‘failure’; and the increased rigour and academic demands of the curriculum.</p>
</blockquote>
<p>These findings are supported by <a href="http://www.euro.who.int/__data/assets/pdf_file/0003/163857/Social-determinants-of-health-and-well-being-among-young-people.pdf">2009/10 survey data</a> from the World Health Organisation and findings by the children’s charity ChildLine in both <a href="http://www.nspcc.org.uk/globalassets/documents/research-reports/childline-review-2012-2013.pdf">2014</a> and <a href="http://www.nspcc.org.uk/globalassets/documents/annual-reports/childline-review-under-pressure.pdf">2015</a>, which highlight that children and young people in England are suffering from growing levels of school-related anxiety and stress. </p>
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<img alt="" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/205693/original/file-20180209-51716-17g7hi4.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/205693/original/file-20180209-51716-17g7hi4.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=450&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/205693/original/file-20180209-51716-17g7hi4.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=450&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/205693/original/file-20180209-51716-17g7hi4.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=450&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/205693/original/file-20180209-51716-17g7hi4.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=566&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/205693/original/file-20180209-51716-17g7hi4.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=566&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/205693/original/file-20180209-51716-17g7hi4.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=566&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px">
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<span class="caption">Ominous.</span>
<span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://www.shutterstock.com/image-photo/examination-hall-arrangements-desks-chair-university-750247627?src=VWX0FZOKP1dMaebjiolUBg-4-56">Shutterstock.</a></span>
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<p><a href="https://www.atl.org.uk/advice-and-resources/publications/report-novemberdecember-2016">A recent survey</a> carried out by the Association for Teachers and Lecturers (ATL) found that 82% of educators believe children and young people are under more pressure now than they were 10 years ago, with 89% considering that testing and exams were the biggest cause. <a href="https://sheu.org.uk/sheux/eh311as.pdf">Some research</a> has even drawn a link between the performance pressure created by the education system, and the development of suicidal thoughts and <a href="https://www.researchgate.net/profile/Merryn_Hutchings/publication/309771525_Exam_Factories_The_impact_of_accountability_measures_on_children_and_young_people/links/5822faa408aeb45b58891444.pdf">self-harm</a> among young people.</p>
<h2>Ignoring the evidence</h2>
<p>Gibb’s own colleagues on the health and education select committees have recognised the harmful effects of exam pressure, following a <a href="https://www.publications.parliament.uk/pa/cm201617/cmselect/cmhealth/849/84902.htm">joint inquiry</a> into the impacts of education on children’s mental health. Perfectionism has become <a href="https://theconversation.com/how-perfectionism-became-a-hidden-epidemic-among-young-people-89405">a harmful epidemic</a> among young people, as they attempt to meet the demands of modern society. So to suggest more exams, as a means to combat the stress brought about by exams, misses the mark by a mile. </p>
<p>The schools minister denied that reforms to the curriculum were adding to the pressure on students, claiming that “there are a raft of real-world pressures” – including social media – weighing on young people today. He didn’t explain how imposing more tests could possibly alleviate those pressures. </p>
<p>Nearly 20 years of <a href="http://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1080/0141192990250305/full">empirical research</a> shows us that test preparation can actually obstruct learning, contribute to anxiety and <a href="http://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/01425690701837513">dampen motivation</a>, for both teachers <a href="http://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/17457823.2015.1085323">and learners</a>. This is the ultimate absurdity in Gibb’s defence of an exhausted testing system.</p><img src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/91535/count.gif" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" />
<p class="fine-print"><em><span>Ceri Brown does not work for, consult, own shares in or receive funding from any company or organisation that would benefit from this article, and has disclosed no relevant affiliations beyond their academic appointment.</span></em></p>Schools minister Nick Gibb seems to think young people should face more frequent testing, to prepare for GCSEs. His comments fly in the face of 20 years’ research.Ceri Brown, Lecturer in Education, University of BathLicensed as Creative Commons – attribution, no derivatives.tag:theconversation.com,2011:article/894052018-01-03T13:06:06Z2018-01-03T13:06:06ZHow perfectionism became a hidden epidemic among young people<figure><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/200663/original/file-20180103-26151-w4iomf.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=496&fit=clip" /><figcaption><span class="caption">
</span> <span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://www.shutterstock.com/image-photo/tired-puzzled-woman-sitting-cafe-near-617911967">Shutterstock.</a></span></figcaption></figure><p>In our roles as academics, young people knock on our doors almost every day. They are typically ambitious, bright and hard-working. They have a broad network of friends, and most come from supportive families. Yet no matter how well-adjusted they can appear, we are finding that our students are increasingly likely to seek our support for mental health issues, as well as academic ones.</p>
<p>We are not alone in observing this trend. Student mental illness on UK campuses is at <a href="https://www.ippr.org/files/2017-09/1504645674_not-by-degrees-170905.pdf">record highs</a>. And right across the globe, young people are reporting to clinicians at unprecedented levels with <a href="http://apps.who.int/iris/bitstream/10665/254610/1/WHO-MSD-MER-2017.2-eng.pdf?ua=1">depression, anxiety and suicidal thoughts</a>. </p>
<p>One possible reason for this is that across the US, Canada and the UK, today’s young people are the first generation to grow up in a society based on the principles of neoliberalism championed by the leaders of the late 20th century – Ronald Reagan, Brian Mulroney and Margaret Thatcher respectively. Over the last 50 years, communal interest and civic responsibility have been progressively eroded, replaced by a focus on self-interest and competition in a supposedly free and open market place. </p>
<p>In this new market-based society, young people are evaluated in a host of new ways. Social media, school and university testing and job performance assessments mean young people can be sifted, sorted and ranked by peers, teachers and employers. If young people rank poorly, the logic of our market-based society dictates that they are less deserving – that their inferiority reflects some personal weakness or flaw. </p>
<p><div data-react-class="InstagramEmbed" data-react-props="{"url":"https://www.instagram.com/p/uiGi9wgvRd","accessToken":"127105130696839|b4b75090c9688d81dfd245afe6052f20"}"></div></p>
<p>There is, then, enormous pressure on young people to demonstrate their value and outperform their peers. And there is evidence that they are struggling to cope. In particular, emerging epidemics of serious mental illnesses speak to the negative effects of this market-based society, and a culture which is fundamentally changing the way young people think about themselves and others.</p>
<h2>The rise of perfectionism</h2>
<p>Leading psychologists, Paul Hewitt and Gordon Flett <a href="https://journal.thriveglobal.com/heres-the-profound-psychological-shift-that-frees-people-from-perfectionism-290dc09ad73">have suggested</a> that one of the ways in which younger people are acting differently to their older peers is by showing a greater tendency toward perfectionism. </p>
<p>Broadly speaking, perfectionism is an irrational desire for flawlessness, combined with harsh self-criticism. But on a deeper level, what sets a perfectionist apart from someone who is simply diligent or hard-working is a single-minded need to correct their own imperfections. </p>
<p>Perfectionists need to be told that they have achieved the best possible outcomes, whether that’s through scores and metrics, or other peoples’ approval. When this need is not met, they experience psychological turmoil, because they equate mistakes and failure to inner weakness and unworthiness. </p>
<p>We recently published a study in the <a href="http://psycnet.apa.org/record/2017-57603-001">Psychological Bulletin</a>, which shows that levels of perfectionism have risen significantly among young people since 1989. We think that this may, at least in part, be a symptom of the way that young people are attempting to feel safe, connect with others and find self-worth within market-based, neoliberal societies. </p>
<p>Irrational ideals of the perfect self have become desirable – even necessary – in a world where performance, status and image define a person’s usefulness and value. You don’t need to look far to find examples; corporations and their marketers offer all manner of cosmetic and material solutions for the flawed consumer. Meanwhile, Facebook, Instagram and Snapchat provide platforms to exchange curations of the perfect version of oneself and lifestyle with others. </p>
<figure class="align-center ">
<img alt="" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/200660/original/file-20180103-26157-gwax1t.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/200660/original/file-20180103-26157-gwax1t.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/200660/original/file-20180103-26157-gwax1t.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/200660/original/file-20180103-26157-gwax1t.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/200660/original/file-20180103-26157-gwax1t.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/200660/original/file-20180103-26157-gwax1t.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/200660/original/file-20180103-26157-gwax1t.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px">
<figcaption>
<span class="caption">#instagood?</span>
<span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://www.shutterstock.com/image-photo/beautiful-woman-using-smart-phone-while-785413978?src=aNdU3I89W32QFuif8f3HEw-1-35">Shutterstock.</a></span>
</figcaption>
</figure>
<p>This is a culture which preys on insecurities and amplifies imperfection, impelling young people to focus on their personal deficiencies. As a result, some young people brood chronically about how they should behave, how they should look, or what they should own. Essentially, agitating to perfect themselves and their lives.</p>
<p>It’s no wonder that there’s substantial evidence indicating that perfectionism is associated with (among other things) <a href="http://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1002/per.2053/full">depression</a>, <a href="http://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1002/1098-108X(199503)17:2%3C147::AID-EAT2260170207%3E3.0.CO;2-X/full">anorexia nervosa</a>, <a href="http://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1111/jopy.12333/abstract">suicide ideation</a> and <a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/19383652">early death</a>. </p>
<p>We feel a deep sense of sympathy with our students’ struggles. For the first time on record, <a href="https://www.theguardian.com/society/2016/jul/18/millennials-earn-8000-pounds-less-in-their-20s-than-predecessors">young people are expected</a> to be <a href="https://www.theguardian.com/world/2016/mar/07/revealed-30-year-economic-betrayal-dragging-down-generation-y-income">materially less well-off</a> in adulthood than their parents. And it’s not just their material well-being that’s at stake – their mental and physical well-being is threatened by this hidden epidemic of perfectionism. </p>
<p>It’s time for organisations such as schools and universities, as well as the politicians and civil servants who help to shape the way these organisations operate, to take steps to safeguard the welfare of young people. They must resist marketised forms of competition, at the expense of young people’s mental health. They should teach the importance of compassion over competition. If they do not, the rise of perfectionism – and its association with serious mental illness – is likely to continue unabated.</p><img src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/89405/count.gif" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" />
<p class="fine-print"><em><span>The authors do not work for, consult, own shares in or receive funding from any company or organisation that would benefit from this article, and have disclosed no relevant affiliations beyond their academic appointment.</span></em></p>There is enormous pressure on young people to strive, perform and achieve. And the data indicate that many are struggling to cope.Thomas Curran, Assistant Professor, University of BathAndrew P. Hill, Associate professor, York St John UniversityLicensed as Creative Commons – attribution, no derivatives.tag:theconversation.com,2011:article/437042016-01-07T19:21:49Z2016-01-07T19:21:49ZClinical perfectionism: when striving for excellence gets you down<figure><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/105206/original/image-20151210-7434-4rh27w.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=496&fit=clip" /><figcaption><span class="caption">Clinical perfectionists constantly strive for ambitious goals and judge their self-worth on the achievement of these goals.</span> <span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="http://www.shutterstock.com/pic-289558754/stock-photo-stressed-man-working-at-laptop-in-home-office.html?src=t91n_1cvunI9feX66PUbSg-1-7">Monkey Business Images/Shutterstock</a></span></figcaption></figure><p>We all know a perfectionist – the person we live with, share an office with, or are friends with, who has agonisingly high standards and is disappointed when things fall short. It might even be you. It’s often harmless enough. </p>
<p>But for some people, this perfectionism is taken to an extreme level, and interferes with their ability to work, study or maintain relationships. This is known as clinical perfectionism. </p>
<p>Clinical perfectionists constantly strive for ambitious goals and judge their self-worth on the achievement of these goals. Not meeting these goals, whether realistic or not, is met with a barrage of self-criticism and loathing.</p>
<p>Some clinical perfectionists avoid or procrastinate because they fear not being able to meet their desired standards. </p>
<p>Clinical perfectionism is not listed as a disorder <em>per se</em> in the diagnostic manuals, but it can increase the risk for a number of disorders, including depression, anxiety and <a href="http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/20721893">eating disorders</a>. </p>
<h2>How common is it?</h2>
<p>We don’t know the prevalence among adults, but we have some data for young people. </p>
<p>One in four Australian adolescents are <a href="http://users.monash.edu.au/%7Ehwatt/articles/HawkinsWattSinclair_EPM2006.pdf">self-critical</a> when standards are not met. <a href="http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/25747974">Around</a> 1.6% of boys and 3.4% of girls experience clinical perfectionism most or all of the time. </p>
<h2>When should you get help?</h2>
<p>Clinical perfectionists often don’t see themselves as perfectionists because they believe they can’t do anything perfectly. So, they’re surprised at how well the description fits them. </p>
<p>Take Lisa, for example, who presented for treatment for an eating disorder. She had been kicked out of university for repeatedly failing all her subjects and not responding to a “please explain” letter. </p>
<p>Lisa feared not doing her work perfectly and not being the perfect student, so she had not handed in work she had done and had avoided attending tutorials. She didn’t withdraw from her subjects, as that would be an acknowledgement of failure. </p>
<p>She found it impossible to respond to the “please explain” letter as she felt she could not explain her situation eloquently enough.</p>
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<img alt="" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/105207/original/image-20151210-7428-wocmei.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/105207/original/image-20151210-7428-wocmei.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/105207/original/image-20151210-7428-wocmei.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/105207/original/image-20151210-7428-wocmei.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/105207/original/image-20151210-7428-wocmei.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/105207/original/image-20151210-7428-wocmei.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/105207/original/image-20151210-7428-wocmei.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px">
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<span class="caption">Around 3.4% of girls have clinical perfectionism.</span>
<span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="http://www.shutterstock.com/pic-225178372/stock-photo-professor-giving-presentation-in-lecture-hall-at-university-participants-listening-to-lecture-and.html?src=BCW-HvnGD2mo40JfaaiL_A-1-1">Matej Kastelic/Shutterstock</a></span>
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<p>Another example is Daniel, a health professional with a busy private practice. He would schedule long appointments with clients to make sure he didn’t miss any important details, and stayed back for hours after everyone else left to complete detailed case notes. </p>
<p>Daniel often came into work the next day tired, and was unable to keep up with the same client load as his colleagues. This led to an unpleasant staff meeting where he was accused of not pulling his weight, and was threatened with dismissal. </p>
<p>It’s human nature to delay getting help until the situation has become intolerable. But in situations such as these, or when perfectionism is leading to low mood, suicidal thoughts, intense anxiety states, or disordered eating, it’s time to get help.</p>
<h2>How is it treated?</h2>
<p>Clinical perfectionism is treated with <a href="http://www.guilford.com/books/Cognitive-Behavioral-Treatment-of-Perfectionism/Egan-Wade-Shafran-Antony/9781462516988/authors">specific type of cognitive behaviour therapy</a> (CBT). </p>
<p>This first involves educating the person about the difference between useful and clinical perfectionism, the damaging aspects of clinical perfectionism, and how it can actually make it less likely people will achieve their goals. </p>
<p>Each person then develops a personalised case plan. From this, goals are set collaboratively with the therapist. </p>
<p>Therapists encourage clients to experiment with different ways of approaching their goals, and to have flexible standards and self-compassion rather than self-criticism. They also try to eliminate procrastination and avoidance. </p>
<p>The therapist helps the client compare the outcomes of approaching goals in this new way compared to the old way. There is also an emphasis on developing self-worth that is not completely contingent on achievements. </p>
<p>This approach <a href="http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/25461785">has been shown</a> to reduce clinical perfectionism and mental health problems when done in group format, one-to-one therapy, or guided self-therapy. </p>
<p>Among adults who were already in treatment for a variety of mental health problems, <a href="http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/22892141">one study found that group therapy</a> not only reduced clinical perfectionism, but also significantly reduced levels of self-criticism, anxiety, depression and stress. </p>
<h2>Where to start</h2>
<p>If you think you’re experiencing clinical perfectionism and it’s leading to psychological difficulties, talk to your general practitioner, who can refer you to a psychologist who has expertise in cognitive behaviour therapy. </p>
<p>Alternatively, a <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Overcoming-Perfectionism-Books-Roz-Shafran/dp/1845297423">self-help book</a> is available, which you can work through on you own or with a counsellor.</p><img src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/43704/count.gif" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" />
<p class="fine-print"><em><span>Tracey Wade is co-author on two of the books referred to in this article: Shafran R, Egan S, Wade TD. (2010). Overcoming Perfectionism. London: Robinson and Egan S, Wade TD, Shafran R, Antony, M. (2014). Cognitive-behavioural treatment of perfectionism. New York: Guilford. As such, she receives royalties from sales of these books.</span></em></p>Some clinical perfectionists avoid or procrastinate because they fear not being able to meet their desired standards.Tracey Wade, Professor of Psychology, Flinders UniversityLicensed as Creative Commons – attribution, no derivatives.tag:theconversation.com,2011:article/452282015-10-07T01:01:48Z2015-10-07T01:01:48ZPulling out your hair in frustration? What you need to know about trichotillomania<figure><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/97507/original/image-20151006-7345-kfnfmf.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=496&fit=clip" /><figcaption><span class="caption">Trichotillomania is a psychological disorder that leads people to compulsively and uncontrollably pull out their own hair. </span> <span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://www.flickr.com/photos/cavale/3407225657/">Cavale Doom/Flickr</a>, <a class="license" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-nd/4.0/">CC BY-NC-ND</a></span></figcaption></figure><p>For most people, the expression “I’m so stressed I could pull out my hair!” is just a saying. But for some, it’s the reality of living with <a href="http://www.trich.org/about/hair-signs-symptoms.html">trichotillomania</a>, a psychological disorder that leads people to compulsively and uncontrollably pull out their own hair – from the head, eyelashes, eyebrows, and other bodily areas. </p>
<p>The disorder affects women more often than men, at a <a href="http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/19932593">ratio of around ten to one</a>. Around <a href="http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/21135642">80%</a> of the people affected develop the disorder between the ages of six and 18, and experience it for at least <a href="http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/1992841">20 years</a>. </p>
<p>People with trichotillomania often pull to the point of causing complete hair loss even though that’s never intended or desired. This causes shame, embarrassment and guilt, and leads people to spend significant <a href="http://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1002/bin.211/abstract">time, effort and money</a> trying to hide the disorder from their friends, family, and acquaintances. Hiding hair loss typically involves <a href="http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/10770238">avoiding</a> school or work, sport and recreation, social events, and intimate relationships. And this leaves people with the disorder feeling depressed and isolated. </p>
<p>Even though trichotillomania affects <a href="http://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S2211364912000929">2%</a> to <a href="http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/20694115">4%</a> of the population (that’s up to 920,000 Australians), it remains relatively unknown and misunderstood.</p>
<h2>Trichotillomania’s causes</h2>
<p>Trichotillomania has long been considered a <a href="http://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/0005796773901198">habit</a> because many people pull their hair without even realising they’re doing it. While pulling at one’s hair is often done <a href="https://www.med.upenn.edu/ctsa/user_documents/FlessnerFranklin_MIST-A_2008.pdf">without thinking</a>, we now know that trichotillomania is much more <a href="https://theconversation.com/dont-pull-your-hair-out-over-trichotillomania-10163">complex</a> – and distressing.</p>
<p>It’s likely that there are <a href="https://books.google.com.au/books?id=zdCyMRl6RuEC&pg=PA16&lpg=PA16&dq=biopsychosocial+model+of+trichotillomania&source=bl&ots=7brNbyrcZW&sig=zdpmkJH6132w2artPZnT0zTry-g&hl=en&sa=X&ved=0CCIQ6AEwAGoVChMI04jE7JT9xgIVhdymCh1IEAIJ#v=onepage&q=biopsychosocial%20model%20of%20trichotillomania&f=false">biological, psychological and social factors</a> that make some people more likely to develop the disorder than others. We know this because trichotillomania <a href="http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/24415254">runs in families</a> and there’s evidence for a strong <a href="http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/19199280">genetic component</a> in its development. But whether there’s <a href="http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/22942103">a specific gene</a> responsible for the disorder is not yet known.</p>
<p><a href="http://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S2090123215000569">Brain imaging</a> studies show brain regions responsible for impulse control, processing emotions, and reward-based learning could be different in people with trichotillomania. And these findings are consistent with the psychological experience of the disorder. </p>
<p>Affected people typically report an intense urge to pull their hair, which can feel like a rising sense of tension or discomfort. And once they start pulling out their hair, it can be very hard to stop, even if they really want to. Instead of feeling pain from the pulled hair, people with trichotillomania tend to experience a sense of relief or even pleasure. And because it feels good, it’s more likely they will pull their hair again and again.</p>
<figure class="align-center ">
<img alt="" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/97508/original/image-20151007-7335-2phvtv.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/97508/original/image-20151007-7335-2phvtv.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=453&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/97508/original/image-20151007-7335-2phvtv.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=453&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/97508/original/image-20151007-7335-2phvtv.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=453&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/97508/original/image-20151007-7335-2phvtv.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=569&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/97508/original/image-20151007-7335-2phvtv.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=569&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/97508/original/image-20151007-7335-2phvtv.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=569&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px">
<figcaption>
<span class="caption">Trichotillomania has long been considered a habit - but it’s actually a complex and distressing disorder.</span>
<span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://www.flickr.com/photos/partywounds/3585842559/">Chloe Chaplin/Flickr</a>, <a class="license" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nd/4.0/">CC BY-ND</a></span>
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<p>Pulling hair reduces feelings of frustration, anxiety, boredom and sadness in people with the disorder. This is one reason why hair pulling seems to increase with stressful life events. Researchers now think that hair pulling helps people to <a href="http://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S027273581300072X">control</a> or <a href="http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/15157815">avoid</a> experiencing negative emotions. </p>
<p><a href="http://journals.cambridge.org/action/displayAbstract?fromPage=online&aid=9909253&fileId=S081348391500011X">Our research</a>, recently published in the journal <a href="http://journals.cambridge.org/action/displayJournal?jid=BEC">Behaviour Change</a>, suggests unhelpful thinking styles, such as perfectionism (“everything I do has to be perfect and correct”) and self-critical thoughts (“I’m worthless”), trigger and maintain hair pulling.</p>
<p>These findings support the use of therapies such as <a href="http://apy.sagepub.com/content/23/4/365">cognitive behavioural therapy</a> to treat trichotillomania. Cognitive behavioural therapy helps people change the unhelpful thoughts that trigger negative emotions, which hair pulling reduces. </p>
<h2>Effective treatments</h2>
<p><a href="http://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1111/cp.12074/full">A recent review</a> of treatments for trichotillomania led by our research group showed psychological therapies are more effective than medications for reducing the severity of the disorder’s symptoms. The treatments we looked at were all <a href="http://apy.sagepub.com/content/23/4/365">variations of cognitive behavioural therapy</a>. </p>
<p>Cognitive behavioural therapy is a practical therapy that teaches people new skills for changing the <a href="http://www.trich.org/dnld/comprehen_model_btt.pdf">thoughts, emotions and behaviours</a> that influence hair pulling. Together, the studies we looked at showed a significant decrease in trichotillomania severity immediately after treatment when compared to a group who had no treatment.</p>
<p>But exactly how psychological therapy reduces trichotillomania symptoms remains to be understood. It’s likely different treatment strategies work better for some people than for others. </p>
<p>Of the four medications we reviewed, three showed promise: N-acetyl cysteine (a type of amino acid), clomipramine (an antidepressant) and olanzapine (an atypical antipsychotic). While the fourth medication, Fluoxetine (another kind of antidepressant), is <a href="http://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S1077722910000519">commonly prescribed</a> for trichotillomania in practice, it was weakest for reducing symptoms of this disorder. </p>
<p><a href="http://www.abc.net.au/triplej/hack/stories/s4279581.htm">Awareness</a> of trichotillomania is growing in Australia, and support is becoming more accessible. The <a href="https://www.arcvic.org.au/">Anxiety Recovery Centre of Victoria</a>, for instance, now runs monthly support groups in Melbourne, Adelaide, Brisbane, and Perth. </p>
<p>Feedback from participants has been overwhelmingly positive, with many learning for the first time that they’re not alone with this prevalent, but hidden, disorder. Helping people with trichotillomania feel understood, supported, and less alone is an essential part of their recovery. </p>
<p><em>To find out more about support groups, treatment options and research opportunities, please contact <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/imogen-rehm-14809">Imogen Rehm</a> or <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/reneta-slikboer-181446">Reneta Slikboer</a>.</em></p>
<p><em>For 24-hour crisis support, please phone Lifeline (Australia): 13 11 14.</em></p><img src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/45228/count.gif" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" />
<p class="fine-print"><em><span>Reneta Slikboer receives funding from Australian Rotary Health in the form of the Ian Scott Scholarship. She is affiliated with the Anxiety Recovery Centre of Victoria for which she volunteers.</span></em></p><p class="fine-print"><em><span>Imogen Rehm does not work for, consult, own shares in or receive funding from any company or organisation that would benefit from this article, and has disclosed no relevant affiliations beyond their academic appointment.</span></em></p>People with trichotillomania often pull to the point of causing complete hair loss even though that’s never intended or desired. And this eventually leaves them feeling depressed and isolated.Imogen Rehm, PhD Candidate / Provisional Psychologist, Swinburne University of TechnologyReneta Slikboer, PhD Candidate researching trichotillomania, Swinburne University of TechnologyLicensed as Creative Commons – attribution, no derivatives.