tag:theconversation.com,2011:/global/topics/emotions-1351/articlesEmotions – The Conversation2024-02-12T13:26:11Ztag:theconversation.com,2011:article/2224802024-02-12T13:26:11Z2024-02-12T13:26:11ZAre you really in love? How expanding your love lexicon can change your relationships and how you see yourself<figure><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/574485/original/file-20240208-20-i320ao.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&rect=0%2C0%2C1732%2C1732&q=45&auto=format&w=496&fit=clip" /><figcaption><span class="caption">Language can steer your heart in unexpected ways.</span> <span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://www.gettyimages.com/detail/illustration/heart-with-speech-bubbles-royalty-free-illustration/639561892">VLADGRIN/Stock via Getty Images Plus</a></span></figcaption></figure><p>What is love? Could those feelings you label as love be something else? </p>
<p>What about infatuation? Obsession? A passing fancy? Being smitten? Enthrallment? Beguilement? Lust? A crush? A <a href="https://medium.com/@caitlin_murphy/whats-a-squish-cb07ce59adc1">squish</a>? Platonic admiration? Why do people categorize some attachments as romantic love but not others? </p>
<p>Suppose Holly meets someone on vacation. They quickly become romantically and sexually intimate and seem deeply compatible. Holly is from the U.K., where the term “<a href="https://www.oed.com/dictionary/holiday-romance_n">holiday romance</a>” is commonly used and part of her vocabulary. Because she knows this term, she can apply its social scaffolding to this relationship. She understands that the rapid emotional intimacy and apparent compatibility she experienced likely sprang from <a href="https://www.telegraph.co.uk/travel/travel-truths/36-questions-to-fall-in-love-arthur-aron-holiday-romance/">fleeting circumstances</a> that aren’t meant to last. </p>
<p>Someone from the U.S., however, where this term is <a href="https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/holiday-romance">rarely used</a>, might more easily interpret this rapid intimacy as a sign of deep, significant lifelong compatibility.</p>
<p>Judging that you are in love <a href="https://theconversation.com/why-does-love-feel-magical-its-an-evolutionary-advantage-180443">can be powerful</a>. It can affect your feelings, relationships and even your sexuality. But how do people judge whether they are in love?</p>
<p>This, I argue, depends on your <a href="https://philpapers.org/rec/GARWFT">linguistic community</a>. That is, how the people around you talk about romance, relationships and attraction. </p>
<p>I am a philosopher who <a href="https://scholar.google.com/citations?user=M5Vxs_cAAAAJ&hl=en">studies categorization schemas</a> – how, when and why people label things such as emotions, sexuality and health. I examine the effects of those labels on how people understand themselves and on their well-being, and how alternative taxonomies and labels can make people understand and shape the world differently. </p>
<p>What happens when a culture instills a broader, more encompassing definition of love, or a narrower, more restrictive definition? How does having a richer vocabulary of words in the neighborhood of love change how we understand it?</p>
<h2>The social scaffolding of words</h2>
<p>Self-ascriptions of love <a href="https://philpapers.org/rec/GARWFT">depend on two things</a>. The first are introspective judgments about your feelings: Are you attracted to the person? Energized by them? Nervous around them? And the second is what you think love is: Does love require caring about the person? Thinking about them a lot? Sexual attraction? When how you feel about a person and what you think love is match up, you self-ascribe love. That is, you judge that you are in love. </p>
<p>Words provide social scaffolding. That is, they create expectations and norms that steer how you behave and react to other people. And vocabularies vary by culture and era.</p>
<p>Categorizing an attachment as a “holiday romance” doesn’t just describe it but can also change its course. The label affects what Holly notices and values about the time she spends together with another person and whether she is inclined to pursue a long-term relationship.</p>
<p><a href="https://theconversation.com/the-power-of-language-we-translate-our-thoughts-into-words-but-words-also-affect-the-way-we-think-111801">Vocabulary is empowering</a>. Having an even more expansive vocabulary would allow Holly to experiment with different labels, and these could shape her relationships in different ways. </p>
<p>For example, the term “<a href="https://www.theheartradio.org/season1/thehurricane">eintagsliebe</a>,” based on the German word for “mayfly” and translating to “one day’s love,” refers to an intense and brief relationship. “<a href="https://poly.land/2021/08/31/what-are-comet-relationships/">Comet lovers</a>” have a deep romantic bond but see each other only intermittently, living far apart the rest of the time without much contact. A “<a href="https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=holibae">holibae</a>” is a perennial date that happens only when you’re visiting home for the holidays. See also “<a href="https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Post%2FZip%20Code%20Rule">zipcoding</a>” – dating someone only when you’re both in the same ZIP code.</p>
<h2>The dictionary of polyamory</h2>
<p>Words create possibilities, and the recent surge of <a href="https://theconversation.com/whats-a-polycule-an-expert-on-polyamory-explains-195083">interest in polyamory</a>, or having more than one romantic relationship at a time, has introduced substantial amounts of <a href="https://www.readyforpolyamory.com/polyamory-glossary">new vocabulary</a>.</p>
<p>An “anchor partner” is a central figure in your romantic life. A “nesting partner” is a partner you live with. And a “satellite partner” has emotional and physical distance from your home. Vocabularies sculpted by traditional monogamous relationships might not distinguish between these types of attachments because they see non-cohabitating partnerships only as <a href="https://www.cosmopolitan.com/sex-love/a41443281/relationship-escalator/">temporary transition phases</a> that end by breaking up or become serious by moving in.</p>
<p>By rejecting the mainstream social scaffolding about relationships, polyamory creates the <a href="https://blog.franklinveaux.com/2017/12/an-update-to-the-map-of-non-monogamy/">need for more terms</a> to describe innovative relationship structures. And those words in turn create more possibilities for how polyamorous people interpret and structure their attachments.</p>
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<a href="https://images.theconversation.com/files/574493/original/file-20240208-26-zsfx3i.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=1000&fit=clip"><img alt="Backs of group of people with their arms links around each other, backlit by the sun" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/574493/original/file-20240208-26-zsfx3i.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/574493/original/file-20240208-26-zsfx3i.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/574493/original/file-20240208-26-zsfx3i.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/574493/original/file-20240208-26-zsfx3i.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/574493/original/file-20240208-26-zsfx3i.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/574493/original/file-20240208-26-zsfx3i.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/574493/original/file-20240208-26-zsfx3i.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px"></a>
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<span class="caption">Polyamory has inspired new vocabulary to describe nontraditional relationship structures.</span>
<span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://www.gettyimages.com/detail/photo/low-angle-view-of-friends-with-arm-around-standing-royalty-free-image/961358016">Cavan Images/Cavan via Getty Images</a></span>
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<p>“<a href="https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-polyamorists-next-door/201910/new-relationship-energy-what-it-is-how-deal-it">New relationship energy</a>” is the buzzing excitement of a new relationship. “<a href="https://polywithabigheart.com/2020/01/27/established-relationship-energy/">Established relationship energy</a>” is the comfort of a stable, long-term relationship. These emotions are especially salient within polyamorous relationships, where the excitement of a new relationship can arise alongside the comfort of preexisting relationships. </p>
<p>But monogamous relationships also benefit from these linguistic innovations. Monogamous relationships might also involve new relationship energy, established relationship energy, and nesting, anchor and satellite partnerships, even if they aren’t labeled as such. Such self-understandings affect the values, emotions, commitments and beliefs people use to forge relationships.</p>
<h2>Conceptual tourism</h2>
<p>Conceptual schemas, or the words and concepts we have for understanding ourselves and the world around us, have <a href="https://philpapers.org/rec/GARWFT">permissive flexibility</a>: People can disagree about what words like “love,” “crush” and “bi-curious” mean. Disagreement doesn’t mean that someone is wrong. Rather, flexibility allows us to explore different ways to understand the world and ourselves. We can be conceptual tourists.</p>
<p>Suppose Nell develops an ambiguous attachment to a new classmate. She finds her charming, witty and pretty, but it isn’t a clear-cut case of romantic attraction. Nell can adopt a broad or narrow definition of the word “crush,” depending on whether her feelings meet how she defines a “crush.” Altering what she means by a “crush” would change whether she labels herself as having a crush. This, in turn, could affect whether Nell sees herself as queer or straight.</p>
<p>If she knows other terms to describe her feelings, Nell might interpret them as “<a href="https://www.choosingtherapy.com/types-of-attraction/">alterous attraction</a>,” which is the desire for emotional intimacy in a way that is neither platonic nor romantic. She might seek a “<a href="https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/bound-together/202109/queerplatonic-relationships-new-term-old-custom">queerplatonic relationship</a>,” which resembles a conventional romantic relationship but without sex or conventional romance. Or, if her feelings are intense, Nell might self-ascribe “<a href="https://digitalcommons.sacredheart.edu/cgi/viewcontent.cgi?article=1134&context=psych_fac">limerence</a>,” which is obsessive infatuation.</p>
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<a href="https://images.theconversation.com/files/574487/original/file-20240208-28-blh1vu.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=1000&fit=clip"><img alt="Two people sitting back to back on grass, hands loosely intertwined" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/574487/original/file-20240208-28-blh1vu.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/574487/original/file-20240208-28-blh1vu.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/574487/original/file-20240208-28-blh1vu.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/574487/original/file-20240208-28-blh1vu.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/574487/original/file-20240208-28-blh1vu.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/574487/original/file-20240208-28-blh1vu.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/574487/original/file-20240208-28-blh1vu.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px"></a>
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<span class="caption">How you label your feelings toward someone influences how you interpret them.</span>
<span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://www.gettyimages.com/detail/photo/couple-holding-hands-royalty-free-image/1209086354">Johner Images/Johner Images Royalty-Free via Getty Images</a></span>
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<p><a href="https://philpapers.org/rec/GARWFT">Self-ascribing labels</a> affects what people notice about themselves, how they interpret their feelings and what they appreciate about their attachments. What she pays attention to <a href="https://philarchive.org/rec/GARAOT-11">fuels particular emotions</a> and can bolster certain attitudes, like profound gratitude, that might distinguish love from crushes. </p>
<p>For example, if Nell interprets herself as having a crush, she may become more attuned to the excitement she feels around her classmate, which can fuel those emotions in a feedback loop. If she labels her feelings as platonic admiration, she might <a href="https://www.jstor.org/stable/j.ctt7snpw.8">instead interpret</a> herself as being nervous about impressing her new classmate. </p>
<p>Nell can experimentally adopt different labels – alterous attraction, queer, crush, limerence, straight and more – to see which fit best. Some labels might better match her emotions. And those labels might also change her emotions and become <a href="https://www.verywellmind.com/what-is-a-self-fulfilling-prophecy-6740420">self-fulfilling prophecies</a>. </p>
<p><a href="https://philpapers.org/rec/GARWFT">Conceptual tourism</a> can be a valuable cognitive skill. It requires the mental dexterity to inhabit rival <a href="https://doi.org/10.1093/oso/9780190860974.003.0002">conceptual schemas</a> and try on new interpretative terms. Doing so can increase your self-understanding, cultivate self-determination and even help steer your heart. </p>
<p>Culture unavoidably provides a lexicon of attachment that shapes how you relate to other people. A culture that is more <a href="https://www.bonn-institute.org/en/news/psychology-in-journalism-2">deliberate about the words</a> it uses for different kinds of attraction can help people bond in new and more open-minded ways. </p>
<p>It’s also a great motivator for education: Learning new words can help you improve your love life.</p><img src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/222480/count.gif" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" />
<p class="fine-print"><em><span>Georgi Gardiner receives funding from the University of Tennessee. She has previously received funding from the American Council for Learned Societies (ACLS) and the Institute for Humane Studies (IHS). </span></em></p>Words have power, and what vocabulary you have at your disposal to describe your relationships with other people can shape what directions those relationships can take.Georgi Gardiner, Associate Professor of Philosophy and Fellow of the University of Tennessee Humanities Center (UTHC), University of TennesseeLicensed as Creative Commons – attribution, no derivatives.tag:theconversation.com,2011:article/2176542024-02-08T13:40:39Z2024-02-08T13:40:39ZAnger, sadness, boredom, anxiety – emotions that feel bad can be useful<figure><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/573800/original/file-20240206-18-uxu2ut.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&rect=199%2C0%2C5697%2C3550&q=45&auto=format&w=496&fit=clip" /><figcaption><span class="caption">A bad feeling can trigger behavior that leads to something better.</span> <span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://www.gettyimages.com/detail/photo/diverse-people-holding-emoticon-royalty-free-image/935941772">Rawpixel/iStock via Getty Images Plus</a></span></figcaption></figure><p>Remember the sadness that came with the last time you failed miserably at something? Or the last time you were so anxious about an upcoming event that you couldn’t concentrate for days?</p>
<p>These types of emotions are unpleasant to experience and can even feel overwhelming. People often try to avoid them, suppress them or ignore them. In fact, in psychology experiments, people will <a href="https://doi.org/10.1007/s10902-012-9394-7">pay money to not feel many negative emotions</a>. But recent research is revealing that emotions can be useful, and even negative emotions can bring benefits.</p>
<p><a href="https://scholar.google.com/citations?user=fzHtrJIAAAAJ&hl=en&oi=ao">In my</a> <a href="https://emotionsciencelab.com">emotion science lab</a> at Texas A&M University, we study how emotions like anger and boredom affect people, and we explore ways that these feelings can be beneficial. We share the results so people can learn how to use their emotions to build the lives they want.</p>
<p>Our studies and many others have shown that emotions aren’t uniformly good or bad for people. Instead, different emotions can result in better outcomes in particular types of situations. Emotions seem to function like a Swiss army knife – different emotional tools are helpful in specific situations.</p>
<h2>Sadness can help you recover from a failure</h2>
<p>Sadness occurs when people perceive that they’ve lost a goal or a desired outcome, and there’s nothing they can do to improve the situation. It could be getting creamed in a game or failing a class or work project, or it can be losing a relationship with a family member. Once evoked, sadness is associated with what psychologists call a deactivation state of doing little, without much behavior or <a href="https://dictionary.apa.org/arousal">physical arousal</a>. Sadness also brings <a href="https://doi.org/10.1111/ap.12232">thinking that is more detailed and analytical</a>. It makes you stop <a href="https://doi.org/10.1177/0963721412474458">and think</a>.</p>
<p>The benefit of the stopping and thinking that comes with sadness is that it <a href="https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-319-77619-4_4">helps people recover from failure</a>. When you fail, that typically means the situation you’re in is not conducive to success. Instead of just charging ahead in this type of scenario, sadness prompts people to step back and <a href="https://doi.org/10.1037/a0016242">evaluate what is happening</a>.</p>
<p>When people are sad, they process information in a deliberative, analytical way and want to avoid risk. This mode comes with <a href="https://doi.org/10.1037/0022-3514.75.2.318">more accurate memory</a>, <a href="https://doi.org/10.1080/02699939108411048">judgment that is less influenced</a> <a href="https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jesp.2004.11.005">by irrelevant assumptions or information</a>, and <a href="https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jesp.2008.04.010">better detection of other people lying</a>. These cognitive changes can encourage people to understand past failures and possibly prevent future ones.</p>
<p>Sadness can function differently when there’s the possibility that the failure could be avoided if other people help. In these situations, people tend to <a href="https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1469-8986.1994.tb01049.x">cry and can experience</a> <a href="https://doi.org/10.1007/s10286-018-0526-y">increased physiological arousal</a>, such as quicker heart and breathing rates. Expressing sadness, through tears or verbally, has the benefit of <a href="https://doi.org/10.1177/147470491301100114">potentially recruiting other people to help you</a> achieve your goals. This behavior appears to start in infants, with <a href="https://doi.org/10.2307/1127506">tears and cries signaling caregivers to help</a>.</p>
<figure class="align-center zoomable">
<a href="https://images.theconversation.com/files/573801/original/file-20240206-18-9r5azc.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=1000&fit=clip"><img alt="A woman yells into a phone with her hair blowing up and back" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/573801/original/file-20240206-18-9r5azc.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/573801/original/file-20240206-18-9r5azc.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=470&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/573801/original/file-20240206-18-9r5azc.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=470&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/573801/original/file-20240206-18-9r5azc.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=470&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/573801/original/file-20240206-18-9r5azc.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=590&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/573801/original/file-20240206-18-9r5azc.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=590&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/573801/original/file-20240206-18-9r5azc.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=590&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px"></a>
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<span class="caption">Anger can prepare you to blast through any roadblocks holding you back.</span>
<span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://www.gettyimages.com/detail/photo/woman-is-shouting-into-phone-royalty-free-image/108876267">Betsie Van der Meer/Stone via Getty Images</a></span>
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<h2>Anger prepares you to overcome an obstacle</h2>
<p>Anger occurs when people perceive they’re losing a goal or desired outcome, but that they could improve the situation by removing something that’s in their way. The obstacle could be an injustice committed by another person, or it could be a computer that repeatedly crashes while you’re trying to get work done. Once evoked, <a href="https://doi.org/10.1037/a0024244">anger is associated with a “readiness for action,”</a> and your <a href="https://doi.org/10.1016/S0191-8869(02)00313-6">thinking focuses on the obstacle</a>.</p>
<p>The benefit of being prepared for action and focused on what’s in your way is that it motivates you to overcome what’s standing between you and your goal. <a href="https://doi.org/10.1177/1754073913512003">When people are angry</a>, they <a href="https://doi.org/10.1002/ejsp.2420240104">process information and make judgments rapidly</a>, want to take action, and are <a href="https://doi.org/10.1016/j.biopsycho.2010.03.010">physiologically aroused</a>. In experiments, <a href="https://doi.org/10.1016/j.paid.2010.04.017">anger actually increases the force of people’s kicks</a>, which can be helpful in physical encounters. Anger results in better outcomes in situations that involve challenges to goals, including confrontational games, <a href="https://doi.org/10.1037/pspa0000350">tricky puzzles</a>, video games with obstacles, and responding quickly on tasks.</p>
<p>Expressing anger, facially or verbally, has the benefit of <a href="http://dx.doi.org/10.1037/pspp0000292">prompting other people to clear the way</a>. People are <a href="https://doi.org/10.1037/0022-3514.86.1.57">more likely to concede in negotiations</a> and <a href="https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jesp.2012.12.015">give in on issues</a> when their adversary looks or says they are angry.</p>
<h2>Anxiety helps you prepare for danger</h2>
<p>Anxiety occurs when people <a href="https://doi.org/10.1177/070674371105601202">perceive a potential threat</a>. This could be giving a speech to a large audience where failure would put your self-esteem on the line, or it could be a physical threat to yourself or loved ones. Once evoked, anxiety is associated with being prepared to respond to danger, including increased physical arousal and <a href="https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1467-9280.2006.01701.x">attention to threats and risk</a>.</p>
<p>Being prepared for danger means that if trouble brews, you can respond quickly to prevent or avoid it. When anxious, people detect threats rapidly, have fast reaction times and <a href="https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1467-9280.2006.01701.x">are on heightened alert</a>. The eye-widening that often comes with fear and anxiety even <a href="https://doi.org/10.1038/nn.2138">gives people a wider field of vision</a> and improves threat detection.</p>
<p>Anxiety prepares the body for action, which improves performance on a number of tasks that involve motivation and attention. It motivates people to prepare for upcoming events, such as devoting time to study for an exam. Anxiety also prompts protective behavior, which can help prevent the potential threat from becoming a reality.</p>
<figure class="align-center zoomable">
<a href="https://images.theconversation.com/files/573803/original/file-20240206-32-tb0hax.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=1000&fit=clip"><img alt="A bored man at desk leans his head in his hand while looking at a computer." src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/573803/original/file-20240206-32-tb0hax.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/573803/original/file-20240206-32-tb0hax.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/573803/original/file-20240206-32-tb0hax.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/573803/original/file-20240206-32-tb0hax.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/573803/original/file-20240206-32-tb0hax.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/573803/original/file-20240206-32-tb0hax.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/573803/original/file-20240206-32-tb0hax.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px"></a>
<figcaption>
<span class="caption">Boredom may be trying to tell you that your current situation needs a shakeup.</span>
<span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://www.gettyimages.com/detail/photo/shot-of-a-young-businessman-looking-bored-while-royalty-free-image/1348347595">Jay Yuno/E+ via Getty Images</a></span>
</figcaption>
</figure>
<h2>Boredom can jolt you out of a rut</h2>
<p>There is less research on boredom than many other emotions, so it is not as well understood. Researchers debate <a href="https://doi.org/10.1016/j.tics.2023.02.002">what it is</a> and <a href="https://doi.org/10.3390/bs3030459">what it does</a>.</p>
<p>Boredom appears to occur when someone’s current situation is <a href="https://doi.org/10.3390/bs3030459">not causing any other emotional response</a>. There are three situations <a href="https://doi.org/10.1007/s11031-011-9234-9">where this lack can occur</a>: when emotions fade, such as the happiness of a new car fading to neutral; when people don’t care about anything in their current situation, such as being at a large party where nothing interesting is happening; or when people have no goals. Boredom does not necessarily set in just because nothing is happening – someone with a goal of relaxation might feel quite content sitting quietly with no stimulation.</p>
<p>Psychology researchers think that the benefit of boredom in situations where people are not responding emotionally is that it <a href="http://dx.doi.org/10.1037/emo0000433">prompts making a change</a>. If nothing in your current situation is worth responding to, the <a href="https://doi.org/10.1002/jocb.154">aversive experience of boredom can motivate you</a> to seek new situations or change the way you’re thinking. Boredom has been related to more risk seeking, a desire for novelty, and creative thinking. It seems to function like an emotional stick, nudging people out of their current situation to explore and create.</p>
<h2>Using the toolkit of emotion</h2>
<p>People want to be happy. But research is finding that a satisfying and productive life includes a <a href="http://dx.doi.org/10.1037/pspp0000292">mix of positive and negative emotions</a>. Negative emotions, even though they feel bad to experience, can motivate and prepare people for failure, challenges, threats and exploration.</p>
<p>Pleasant or not, your emotions can help guide you toward better outcomes. Maybe understanding how they prepare you to handle various situations will help you feel better about feeling bad.</p><img src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/217654/count.gif" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" />
<p class="fine-print"><em><span>Heather Lench does not work for, consult, own shares in or receive funding from any company or organization that would benefit from this article, and has disclosed no relevant affiliations beyond their academic appointment.</span></em></p>Lots of people will do a lot to avoid feeling negative emotions. But researchers are figuring out how these unpleasant feelings actually have benefits.Heather Lench, Professor of Psychological and Brain Sciences, Texas A&M UniversityLicensed as Creative Commons – attribution, no derivatives.tag:theconversation.com,2011:article/2215482024-01-31T13:34:59Z2024-01-31T13:34:59ZWhat Americans can learn from Danish masculinity<figure><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/571990/original/file-20240129-17-otfcjx.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&rect=1268%2C594%2C4019%2C2560&q=45&auto=format&w=496&fit=clip" /><figcaption><span class="caption">Denmark's King Frederik X wipes away a tear as he waves to a crowd of 300,000 people.</span> <span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://newsroom.ap.org/detail/DenmarkRoyalAbdication/3a1b8392aaf449a6ae9a6b4a02aa79df/photo?Query=frederik&mediaType=photo&sortBy=arrivaldatetime:asc&dateRange=now-30d&totalCount=73&currentItemNo=41">Martin Meissner/AP Photo</a></span></figcaption></figure><p>When a leader cries in public, is it a sign of weakness? </p>
<p>On Jan. 14, 2023, Denmark’s Crown Prince Frederik was crowned King Frederik X after his mother, Queen Margrethe II, announced she would be abdicating the throne during her annual New Year’s Eve speech.</p>
<p>After the queen signed a declaration of abdication in a <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BTfNDzO2KvM">private meeting</a>, the king stepped out on the balcony of the Danish parliament – Christiansborg Palace. In front of a throng of <a href="https://via.ritzau.dk/pressemeddelelse/13770145/kong-frederik-samlede-hele-danmark-knap-300000-danskere-deltog-i-fejringen?publisherId=13561616&lang=da">300,000 people</a>, the king waved, teared up and waved again, before <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_vLsBQAaGDc">wiping away the tears with his white-gloved hand</a>. He later shed more tears as his wife and children joined him on the balcony.</p>
<figure>
<iframe width="440" height="260" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/_vLsBQAaGDc?wmode=transparent&start=0" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen=""></iframe>
<figcaption><span class="caption">The proclamation of Denmark’s King Frederik X on Jan. 14, 2024.</span></figcaption>
</figure>
<p><a href="https://www.nytimes.com/2024/01/14/world/europe/king-frederik-denmark.html">The New York Times</a>, <a href="https://www.washingtonpost.com/world/2024/01/14/denmark-king-frederik-succession-queen-margrethe/">The Washington Post</a> and <a href="https://www.theguardian.com/world/video/2024/jan/14/frederik-x-denmark-proclaimed-king-video">The Guardian</a> eagerly noted the emotional moment. One <a href="https://www.weekendavisen.dk/opinion/kongens-taarer">Danish newspaper</a> headline simply read, “The King’s Tears,” while a Danish <a href="https://www.billedbladet.dk/kongelige/danmark/gribende-billeder-der-siger-det-hele-kong-frederik-maatte-toerre-taarer-bort">celebrity magazine</a> featured a series of images of the king wiping his eyes.</p>
<p>In much of the world, tears and masculinity don’t mix. Crying can signal vulnerability and weakness, particularly for men in charge. Showing your emotions is viewed as too effeminate. </p>
<p>But in Denmark, the king’s tears didn’t minimize his popularity. In fact, they burnished it: Showing a feminine side is a core part of Danish masculinity.</p>
<p>As a native Dane <a href="https://scholar.google.com/citations?user=Uaz22I8AAAAJ&hl=en">and a psychologist</a>, I’ve studied Denmark’s unique conception of manhood, which contrasts with masculine ideals in the U.S.</p>
<h2>What makes a man?</h2>
<p>Different cultures have different expectations for how men should act, look and express themselves. </p>
<p>American men <a href="https://rowman.com/ISBN/9781538114056/Hegemonic-Masculinity-Formulation-Reformulation-and-Amplification">are often expected</a> to be tough, strong and stoic. It’s important that they don’t appear too effeminate.</p>
<p>Research shows that in Denmark it can be acceptable – even desirable – for men to show a feminine side. </p>
<p><a href="https://doi.org/10.1037/men0000062">In a study</a> on masculinity and manhood in the U.S. and Denmark, my colleagues Sarah DiMuccio and Megan Yost and I found that among young heterosexual men, Danish men were more likely than American men to describe ideal men as being caring, loving, considerate and empathetic, which in the U.S. are usually seen as <a href="https://global.oup.com/academic/product/manhood-in-america-9780190612535?cc=us&lang=en&">feminine characteristics</a>.</p>
<p>Many of the young Danish men in our study celebrated these qualities in their male friends, for whom they expressed deep affection. They recounted long phone conversations and hugs. They’d routinely say, “I love you,” or use heart emojis in their text messages.</p>
<p>They didn’t seem too concerned about being seen as too effeminate, because they didn’t see avoiding being girly as part of manhood.</p>
<p>Instead, a number of the Danish participants in our study described manhood in opposition to boyhood. Put simply, you are a man when you are no longer a boy. </p>
<p>This made their manhood seem less precarious: It was seen as purely developmental, rather than something that needed to be constantly reinforced.</p>
<figure class="align-center ">
<img alt="Drawing of males at different stages of development." src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/572003/original/file-20240129-21-xm3liq.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/572003/original/file-20240129-21-xm3liq.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=391&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/572003/original/file-20240129-21-xm3liq.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=391&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/572003/original/file-20240129-21-xm3liq.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=391&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/572003/original/file-20240129-21-xm3liq.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=491&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/572003/original/file-20240129-21-xm3liq.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=491&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/572003/original/file-20240129-21-xm3liq.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=491&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px">
<figcaption>
<span class="caption">Danes tend to see manhood simply as a developmental stage.</span>
<span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://www.gettyimages.com/detail/illustration/mans-aging-process-scribbles-royalty-free-illustration/908532074?phrase=evolution+of+boy+to+man+drawing&adppopup=true">A-Digit/DigitalVision Vectors via Getty Images</a></span>
</figcaption>
</figure>
<p>In contrast, the American men viewed manhood in contrast to womanhood: You’re a man when you’re not a woman. For example, we asked one participant how his brothers responded if he did something they deemed unmanly. </p>
<p>“By beating (me up) a little bit and calling me a girl,” he replied.</p>
<p>The positioning of manhood against womanhood makes it more precarious: It must continuously be reinforced. To the American men in our study, suppressing any feminine qualities, including showing emotion, was one way for them to make sure others saw them as “man enough.” </p>
<p><a href="https://doi.org/10.1080/08038740.2015.1046918">In another study</a> examining masculinity among Danish men, the men said that ideal men should have an emotional side; to them, it was a sign of balance and authenticity. </p>
<p>When the men were asked about a public figure or male celebrity who showed the most acceptable masculinity, many of them even mentioned then-Crown Prince Frederik. They saw him as having a good mix of traditionally masculine qualities – he’d served in the military and is athletic – and softer, more feminine qualities: He is considerate of others, talks about his feelings and is engaged with raising his children. He even picks up his children from day care <a href="https://www.dr.dk/nyheder/indland/far-frederik-saetter-graenser">on his cargo bike</a>. </p>
<p>The men in the study added that any good father should be more than a provider. He ought to be present, caring and engaged with his children. </p>
<h2>Gender in the land of equality</h2>
<p>Why are there such profound differences in conceptions of masculinity between these two Western nations?</p>
<p>It could have something to do with the fact that Denmark has some of the highest ratings of gender equality in the world. For example, in 2021, the U.N. ranked the U.S. 44th <a href="https://hdr.undp.org/data-center/thematic-composite-indices/gender-inequality-index#/indicies/GII">in gender equality</a> after assessing health outcomes, political representation and workforce participation among men and women. Denmark, on the other hand, was ranked as the most gender equal country in the world.</p>
<p><a href="https://www.globalledelse.dk/eng/img/pdf/Danish%20Leadership%20Style%20in%20a%20Global%20Perspective_210x280_WEB.pdf">In the Danish workplace</a>, employees and employers are on more equal footing. Managers tend to wield a participatory and democratic leadership style that is informal, open and trusting. There’s an emphasis on a good life-work balance. </p>
<p><a href="https://doi.org/10.1037/0033-295X.109.3.573">This leadership style</a> upends traditional notions of masculinity because it focuses on communal values: empathy, collaboration and relationship-building. It contrasts with traditionally masculine leadership, which in psychology is called “<a href="https://psycnet.apa.org/record/1999-04018-011">agentic leadership</a>,” and which centers on dominance, power and achievement. </p>
<p>The U.S. <a href="https://us.sagepub.com/en-us/nam/cultures-consequences/book9710">tends to champion more masculine values and attitudes</a> in the workplace. <a href="https://doi.org/10.1037/apl0000175">In one experimental study</a>, American men who cried in response to a negative performance evaluation were judged more harshly than women who cried in the same circumstances, because it violated expectations of appropriate masculine behavior. </p>
<p>Royalty in an egalitarian country such as Denmark might seem odd to some people. But King Frederik X, whose role is more cultural and ceremonial, is simply embodying Danish sensibilities. </p>
<p>At his party, <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mIsnIt1p978">he can cry if he wants to</a> – <a href="https://www.dr.dk/nyheder/indland/ny-maaling-viser-hoej-opbakning-til-kronprinsparret">and he’ll be all the more beloved for it</a>.</p><img src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/221548/count.gif" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" />
<p class="fine-print"><em><span>Marie Helweg-Larsen does not work for, consult, own shares in or receive funding from any company or organization that would benefit from this article, and has disclosed no relevant affiliations beyond their academic appointment.</span></em></p>American men see manhood in opposition to womanhood. Danes, on the other hand, see manhood as not acting immaturely, as a boy would.Marie Helweg-Larsen, Professor of Psychology, Dickinson CollegeLicensed as Creative Commons – attribution, no derivatives.tag:theconversation.com,2011:article/2216842024-01-28T13:55:15Z2024-01-28T13:55:15ZThe contraceptive pill also affects the brain and the regulation of emotions<figure><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/570657/original/file-20231221-19-oxth15.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&rect=2%2C0%2C988%2C667&q=45&auto=format&w=496&fit=clip" /><figcaption><span class="caption">Like natural hormones, known as endogenous hormones, the artificial hormones contained in the pill, known as exogenous hormones, can have effects on the brain.</span> <span class="attribution"><span class="source">(Shutterstock)</span></span></figcaption></figure><p>Oral contraceptives, also known as birth control pills, are <a href="https://doi.org/10.18356/1bd58a10-en">used by more than 150 million women worldwide</a>. Approximately one-third of teenagers in <a href="https://www150.statcan.gc.ca/n1/en/pub/82-003-x/2015010/article/14222-eng.pdf">North America</a> and <a href="https://doi.org/10.1001/jamapsychiatry.2016.2387">Europe</a> use them, making them the most prescribed drug for teenagers.</p>
<p>It is well known that oral contraceptives have the power to alter a woman’s menstrual cycle. What’s less well known is that they can also have an effect on the brain, particularly in the regions that are important for regulating emotions.</p>
<p>As a doctoral student and professor of psychology at UQAM, we were interested in the impact of oral contraceptives on the brain regions involved in emotional processes. We published our <a href="https://doi.org/10.3389/fendo.2023.1228504">results in the scientific journal Frontiers in Endocrinology</a>.</p>
<h2>How does the pill work?</h2>
<p>There are several methods of hormonal contraception, but the most common type in North America is the contraceptive pill, more specifically, <a href="https://doi.org/10.1016/j.yfrne.2022.101040">combined oral contraceptives</a> (COCs). These are made up of two artificial hormones that simulate one of the types of estrogen (generally ethinyl estradiol) and progesterone.</p>
<p>Like natural hormones, known as endogenous hormones, the artificial hormones contained in the pill, known as exogenous hormones, <a href="https://doi.org/10.1016/j.yfrne.2022.101040">have an effect on the brain</a>. They bind to receptors in different areas and signal the brain to reduce the production of endogenous sex hormones. It is this phenomenon that leads to the cessation of menstrual cycles, preventing ovulation.</p>
<p>In other words, while using COCs, users’ bodies and brains are not exposed to the fluctuations in sex hormones typically seen in women with a natural cycle.</p>
<h2>The pill’s effects on the brain: neuroscience to the rescue!</h2>
<p>When they start taking COCs, teenage girls and women are informed of their different side effects, mainly physical (nausea, headaches, weight changes, breast tenderness). However, the fact that sex hormones affect the brain, particularly in areas important for regulating emotions, is not generally discussed.</p>
<p>Studies have associated the use of COCs with <a href="https://doi.org/10.1016/j.psyneuen.2018.02.019">poorer ability to regulate emotions</a> and a <a href="https://doi.org/10.1001/jamapsychiatry.2016.2387">higher risk of developing psychopathologies</a>.</p>
<p>In addition, women are more likely than men to suffer from <a href="https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jpsychires.2011.03.006">anxiety and chronic stress disorders</a>. Given the widespread use of COCs, it is important to gain a better understanding of their effects on the anatomy of the brain regions that are responsible for emotional regulation.</p>
<p>We therefore conducted a study to examine the effects of COCs on the anatomy of brain regions involved in emotional processes. We were interested in the effects associated with their current use, but also in the possibility of lasting effects, i.e. whether COCs could affect brain anatomy even after women stopped taking them.</p>
<p>To do this, we recruited four profiles of healthy individuals: women currently using COCs, women who had used COCs in the past, women who had never used any method of hormonal contraception, and men.</p>
<figure class="align-center zoomable">
<a href="https://images.theconversation.com/files/567191/original/file-20231221-24-r2t5pd.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=1000&fit=clip"><img alt="magnetic resonance imaging" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/567191/original/file-20231221-24-r2t5pd.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/567191/original/file-20231221-24-r2t5pd.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/567191/original/file-20231221-24-r2t5pd.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/567191/original/file-20231221-24-r2t5pd.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/567191/original/file-20231221-24-r2t5pd.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/567191/original/file-20231221-24-r2t5pd.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/567191/original/file-20231221-24-r2t5pd.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px"></a>
<figcaption>
<span class="caption">Magnetic resonance imaging (MRI) is used to analyze the morphology of certain regions of the brain.</span>
<span class="attribution"><span class="source">(Shutterstock)</span></span>
</figcaption>
</figure>
<p>Using brain imaging, we found that only women currently using COCs had a slightly thinner ventromedial prefrontal cortex than men. This part of the brain is known to be essential for regulating emotions such as fear. The scientific literature shows that <a href="https://doi.org/10.1073/pnas.0502441102">the thicker this region is, the better the emotional regulation will be</a>.</p>
<p>COCs could therefore alter emotional regulation in women. Although we have not directly tested the link between brain morphology and mental health, our team is currently investigating other aspects of the brain and mental health, which will allow us to better understand our anatomical findings.</p>
<h2>An effect associated with the dose, but that doesn’t last</h2>
<p>We tried to better understand what could explain the effect using COCs on this region of the brain. We discovered that it was associated with the dose of ethinyl estradiol. In fact, among COC users, only those using a low-dose COC (10-25 micrograms) – not a higher dose (30-35 micrograms) – were associated with a thinner ventromedial prefrontal cortex.</p>
<p>It may seem surprising that a lower dose was associated with a cerebral effect…</p>
<p>Given that all COCs reduce concentrations of endogenous sex hormones, we propose that estrogen receptors in this brain region may be insufficiently activated when low levels of endogenous estrogen are combined with a low intake of exogenous estrogen (ethinyl estradiol).</p>
<p>Conversely, higher doses of ethinyl estradiol could help to achieve adequate binding to estrogen receptors in the prefrontal cortex, simulating moderate to high activity similar to that of women with a natural menstrual cycle.</p>
<p>It is important to note that this lower grey matter thickness was specific to current COC use: women who had used COCs in the past showed no thinning compared to men. Our study therefore supports the reversibility of the impact of COCs on cerebral anatomy, in particular on the thickness of the ventromedial prefrontal cortex.</p>
<p>In other words, the use of COCs could affect brain anatomy, but in a reversible way.</p>
<h2>And now?</h2>
<p>Although our research has no direct clinical orientation, it is helping to advance our understanding of the anatomical effects associated with the use of COCs.</p>
<p>We are not calling for women to stop using their COCs: adopting such discourse would be both too hasty and alarming.</p>
<p>It’s also important to remember that the effects reported in our study appear to be reversible.</p>
<p>Our aim is to promote basic and clinical research, but also to increase scientific interest in women’s health, an area that is still understudied.</p><img src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/221684/count.gif" alt="La Conversation" width="1" height="1" />
<p class="fine-print"><em><span>Alexandra Brouillard is a student member of the Research Centre of the Institut universitaire en santé mentale de Montréal. She holds a doctoral scholarship from the Canadian Institutes of Health Research.</span></em></p><p class="fine-print"><em><span>Marie-France Marin is a regular researcher at the Centre de recherche de l'Institut universitaire en santé mentale de Montréal, a professor in the Department of Psychology at the Université du Québec à Montréal and an associate professor in the Department of Psychiatry and Addictology at the Université de Montréal. She was supported by a salary grant from the Fonds de recherche du Québec - Santé (2018-2022) and currently holds a Canada Research Chair in Hormonal Modulation of Cognitive and Emotional Functions (2022-2027). The project discussed in the article is funded by the Canadian Institutes of Health Research and has received support from pilot project funds from the Research Centre of the Institut universitaire en santé mentale de Montréal and the Quebec Bioimaging Network.</span></em></p>Oral contraceptives modify the menstrual cycle. What’s less well known is that they also reach the brain, particularly the regions important for regulating emotions.Alexandra Brouillard, Doctorante en psychologie, Université du Québec à Montréal (UQAM)Marie-France Marin, Professor, Department of Psychology, Université du Québec à Montréal (UQAM)Licensed as Creative Commons – attribution, no derivatives.tag:theconversation.com,2011:article/2168592024-01-22T13:29:39Z2024-01-22T13:29:39ZWhy do people have different tastes in music? A music education expert explains why some songs are universally liked, while others aren’t<figure><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/566074/original/file-20231215-21-eo0769.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&rect=19%2C0%2C2121%2C1409&q=45&auto=format&w=496&fit=clip" /><figcaption><span class="caption">The types of music you listen to can reflect your personality traits. </span> <span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://www.gettyimages.com/detail/photo/group-of-young-friends-listening-to-music-with-royalty-free-image/1156897122?phrase=listening+to+music&adppopup=true">Smile/Stone via Getty Images</a></span></figcaption></figure><figure class="align-left ">
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<p><em><a href="https://theconversation.com/us/topics/curious-kids-us-74795">Curious Kids</a> is a series for children of all ages. If you have a question you’d like an expert to answer, send it to <a href="mailto:curiouskidsus@theconversation.com">curiouskidsus@theconversation.com</a>.</em></p>
<hr>
<blockquote>
<p><strong>Why do we have a certain taste in music, different than others? – Shirya R., age 11</strong></p>
</blockquote>
<hr>
<p>When you turn on the radio, you might hear songs you like and other songs you just skip past. But even the songs you don’t like usually have some fans. Maybe you don’t like older music, but your parents or grandparents might love it <a href="https://theconversation.com/why-do-old-people-hate-new-music-123834">because they grew up</a> with it. It’s familiar and comfortable. When you’re older, you’ll likely return to music you love too.</p>
<p>As a <a href="https://scholar.google.com/citations?user=QXuOzQIAAAAJ&hl=en">music education professor</a> who teaches music psychology, I’ve spent a lot of time thinking about music preferences and how music weaves its way through people’s brains.</p>
<p>Some composers produce music with <a href="https://theconversation.com/burt-bacharach-mastered-the-art-of-the-perfect-pop-song-and-that-aint-easy-199660">cross-generational appeal</a>. Look at the song “True Colors,” which artists have remade time and time again. It was originally released in 1986 by <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LPn0KFlbqX8">Cyndi Lauper</a>.</p>
<p>Ten years later, Disney World’s Epcot used it as part of a <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yUm22pobGU4">pre-show video</a>. Ten years after that, it made its way to our ears again as part of the “Trolls” movie. Now, if you scour the internet, you’ll find lots of covers of this song.</p>
<p>How can this one song appeal to many different people over time, while other songs do not? Why do some people have wildly different tastes in music, even while certain songs can unite people from a variety of backgrounds and generations? </p>
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<figcaption><span class="caption">‘True Colors’ from the movie ‘Trolls,’ starring Justin Timberlake and Anna Kendrick.</span></figcaption>
</figure>
<p>Researchers have looked at <a href="https://www.ucf.edu/pegasus/your-brain-on-music/">how music works in the brain</a>. They suggest people like music with unexpected twists and turns, which sometimes cause <a href="https://theconversation.com/why-do-only-some-people-get-skin-orgasms-from-listening-to-music-59719">pleasurable physical reactions</a> <a href="https://doi.org/10.3389/fnins.2020.565815">or chills</a>. This finding suggests that humans have created and listened to music over time <a href="https://doi.org/10.1093/scan/nsw009">because it is pleasurable or rewarding</a>.</p>
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<figcaption><span class="caption">When you listen to music, you might get chills.</span></figcaption>
</figure>
<h2>Emotions and personality</h2>
<p>Some researchers suggest people experience emotions through music, or that they choose music based on what they want to feel. A <a href="https://doi.org/10.1037/a0022406">2011 study</a> suggests musical preference may reflect the emotions people feel when listening to music, regardless of the music’s style.</p>
<p>Some people respond to mellow and relaxing music. Others’ emotions are triggered by classical-style music. Still others emotionally react to singer-songwriter music like country, folk and some pop music. Preferences for certain types or styles of music might come from the time and place they’re first heard, or it may simply be specific to each person, regardless of what’s going on around them. </p>
<p>Though people might like certain music at one point in their lives, their music preferences change over time based on their lived experiences. When you’re struggling through a tough time, you might choose music that reflects what you wish was happening and <a href="https://doi.org/10.1007/s10824-022-09454-7">search for happy songs</a>. On the flip side, sometimes people <a href="https://doi.org/10.3389/fnhum.2015.00404">gravitate toward sad songs</a>. People want to move through grief, so they may search for songs that help them make sense of their emotions.</p>
<p>However, people’s choices don’t account for the whole picture. Musical taste goes <a href="https://doi.org/10.3389/fpsyg.2023.1062146">deeper than the music type or genre</a>. People who like pop or rock music don’t all like the same pop or rock music. </p>
<p>Studies on <a href="https://doi.org/10.1177/0956797618761659">personality and social media interaction</a> suggest your musical tastes can tell others what kind of personality you have. If someone knows what kind of music you like, that might tell them something about your personality. </p>
<p>Other <a href="https://doi.org/10.1037/pspp0000397">research suggests</a> your music preferences mirror your unique personality. So, people who already know you may be able to suggest music that you would like to hear.</p>
<p>For example, those who are more open might prefer mellow, sophisticated music like Billie Eilish’s “<a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cW8VLC9nnTo">What Was I Made For?</a>” or intense music like Imagine Dragons’ “<a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V5M2WZiAy6k">Natural</a>.”</p>
<p><a href="https://doi.org/10.1037/pspp0000397">The research found</a> extroverts may lean toward contemporary music. Agreeable people prefer unpretentious music, like Garrett Kato & Elina’s “<a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zgxNu8fBrgw">Never Alone</a>.” Conscientious people lean toward <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0o5NTQMzNPo">unpretentious music</a> or intense music like Marshmello’s “<a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IYfejxVZ7lg">Power</a>.” People who are more anxious might prefer many different types of music.</p>
<p>People may like music by artists they like, rather than how the music sounds. Some prefer music from <a href="https://doi.org/10.1037/pspp0000293">artists who are like them</a>, especially when they can view their profiles on <a href="https://doi.org/10.1177/0956797618761659">social media</a>.</p>
<p>Why does knowing what music others like matter? Knowing about different people’s musical preferences and personalities <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=evVRxrOo5iw">can bridge gaps between people</a> with different personalities and identities. </p>
<h2>The music people stream</h2>
<p>A <a href="https://doi.org/10.1038/s41562-018-0508-z">study of 765 million songs streamed</a> by people worldwide revealed several reasons people listen to music. People’s preferences tended to change based on the time of day, their age and particular styles of music. Most people listened to more relaxing music at night but more intense music during the day. </p>
<p>Music streamed in Latin America often produced quicker physical and emotional reactions. Music streamed in Asia was usually relaxing. People who stay up later at night listened to less intense music. Depending on where participants lived, the length of the day also played a part in their music listening habits. In short, people’s environments and their individual moods shaped their preferences.</p>
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<figcaption><span class="caption">Harmony in the Brain: Unraveling the Neuroscience of Music.</span></figcaption>
</figure>
<p>So, why do we have different tastes in music? People have complex personalities, and the music they like may be related to this. People’s brains work in unique ways as they process music. Some may have a physical reaction to certain music, while others may not. People may like music because a musician’s views might be like their own views. That said, some songs surprise, intrigue and entertain a wide variety of listeners, which makes them universally liked.</p>
<p>The bottom line? Each person is unique in many ways, and their musical tastes reflect that uniqueness.</p>
<hr>
<p><em>Hello, curious kids! Do you have a question you’d like an expert to answer? Ask an adult to send your question to <a href="mailto:curiouskidsus@theconversation.com">CuriousKidsUS@theconversation.com</a>. Please tell us your name, age and the city where you live.</em></p>
<p><em>And since curiosity has no age limit – adults, let us know what you’re wondering, too. We won’t be able to answer every question, but we will do our best.</em></p><img src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/216859/count.gif" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" />
<p class="fine-print"><em><span>Jane Kuehne does not work for, consult, own shares in or receive funding from any company or organization that would benefit from this article, and has disclosed no relevant affiliations beyond their academic appointment.</span></em></p>Lots of factors can influence your music taste, from your age and where you’re from to the personality traits you have.Jane Kuehne, Associate Professor of Music Education, Auburn UniversityLicensed as Creative Commons – attribution, no derivatives.tag:theconversation.com,2011:article/2096632024-01-09T13:26:26Z2024-01-09T13:26:26ZTake laughter, add tears − the secret recipe for the most-liked Super Bowl ads<figure><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/545127/original/file-20230828-254480-xdlb1f.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&rect=0%2C15%2C5207%2C3445&q=45&auto=format&w=496&fit=clip" /><figcaption><span class="caption">Emotions often run high during the Super Bowl -- and that includes during the commercial breaks.</span> <span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://newsroom.ap.org/detail/SuperBowlPhiladelphiaReaxFootball/592cb6e493034287be3e6e2a58eed36e/photo?Query=fans%20watch%20football%20on%20TV&mediaType=photo&sortBy=creationdatetime:desc&dateRange=Anytime&totalCount=649&currentItemNo=14&vs=true">Nathan Howard/Associated Press</a></span></figcaption></figure><p>Viewers gravitate toward Super Bowl commercials that incorporate both happiness and sadness, <a href="https://doi.org/10.1080/00913367.2023.2218896">our 2023 study shows</a>. </p>
<p>On the other hand, advertisements that blend happiness and fear turn people off.</p>
<p>And people are indifferent to ads that pair happiness with either anger or disgust.</p>
<p>As researchers with <a href="https://www.boisestate.edu/cobe-marketing/niusha-jones-ph-d/">extensive experience</a> in <a href="https://scholar.google.com/citations?user=LTR4szEAAAAJ&hl=en&oi=ao">consumer behavior</a>, we’ve had the opportunity to delve into the compelling emotional narratives television advertisers try to portray in less than 30 seconds. </p>
<p>Heartwarming ads that also have moments of fear or sadness are quite common, we’ve learned, especially during the Super Bowl. </p>
<h2>Why it matters</h2>
<p>Our research reveals part of the secret sauce behind what makes an advertisement loved or disliked. This finding could help advertisers craft ads that resonate more effectively with their audience. </p>
<p>Raising awareness of what works in advertising also helps viewers understand how they are being manipulated by what they see on the screen.</p>
<h2>How we did our work</h2>
<p>Using <a href="https://www.noldus.com/facereader">technology that reads viewers’ expressions</a>, our research team scrutinized the emotional layers of 296 ads aired during Super Bowls from 2018 to 2022. </p>
<p>This annual NFL championship game draws a <a href="https://www.statista.com/statistics/216526/super-bowl-us-tv-viewership/">huge audience on TV</a>. The costs to broadcast an ad – and the financial stakes for brands paying for air time – are high. For example, a <a href="https://www.statista.com/statistics/217134/total-advertisement-revenue-of-super-bowls/">30-second ad during the 2023 Super Bowl cost US$7 million</a>. </p>
<p>Our analysis wasn’t just a superficial look at the commericial’s storyline. Instead, we delved into the emotions displayed by the actors throughout the ad and measured their effects on how much the audience liked what they saw.</p>
<p>The blend of emotions you witness in commercials during the big game isn’t a coincidence. It’s part of advertisers’ calculated strategy. Combinations of emotions are meticulously orchestrated <a href="https://doi.org/10.1007/s11747-017-0551-8">to capture viewers’ attention and get them shopping</a> – sometimes even before the ad has finished airing.</p>
<p>Happiness was the most common emotion portrayed, but we were surprised to learn that 80% of these ads featured at least one negative emotion in addition to happiness. For example, <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aBDKM_qfCMk">a clip reel of U.S. Olympian skier Lindsey Vonn</a> evoked both sadness and happiness and deeply resonated with viewers.</p>
<figure>
<iframe width="440" height="260" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/aBDKM_qfCMk?wmode=transparent&start=0" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen=""></iframe>
<figcaption><span class="caption">This 2018 Super Bowl commercial featuring Olympic skier Lindsey Vonn skillfully combines happiness and sadness, a winning combination.</span></figcaption>
</figure>
<h2>What’s next</h2>
<p>There is still a big question mark on why certain emotional mixtures work while others don’t. It is also not clear whether the popularity of an advertisement is directly linked to its effectiveness as a sales tool.</p>
<p><em>The <a href="https://theconversation.com/us/topics/research-brief-83231">Research Brief</a> is a short take about interesting academic work.</em></p><img src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/209663/count.gif" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" />
<p class="fine-print"><em><span>The authors do not work for, consult, own shares in or receive funding from any company or organization that would benefit from this article, and have disclosed no relevant affiliations beyond their academic appointment.</span></em></p>Researchers examined the emotional content of nearly 300 Super Bowl ads that aired from 2018 to 2022.Niusha Jones, Assistant Professor of Marketing, Boise State UniversityAnne Hamby, Associate Professor of Marketing, Boise State UniversityLicensed as Creative Commons – attribution, no derivatives.tag:theconversation.com,2011:article/2115222023-09-20T20:06:25Z2023-09-20T20:06:25ZI’ve just been diagnosed with cancer, now what?<figure><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/548196/original/file-20230914-27-waipff.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&rect=111%2C222%2C6079%2C4102&q=45&auto=format&w=496&fit=clip" /><figcaption><span class="caption">
</span> <span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://www.pexels.com/photo/sad-mature-businessman-thinking-about-problems-in-living-room-3772618/">Andrea Piacquadio/Unsplash</a></span></figcaption></figure><p>In one pivotal instant your life has changed and there will be no turning back. How will you accept, adjust and adapt to being “someone who has cancer”? </p>
<p>Well, first, you are still the same person. But now you have a definitive diagnosis calling for your immediate attention.</p>
<p>There are hundreds of kinds of cancer, <a href="https://www.cancer.gov/about-cancer/diagnosis-staging/staging">distinguished</a> and identified according to site, type of cell involved, aggressiveness and evidence of spread. These are the <a href="https://www.aihw.gov.au/reports-data/health-conditions-disability-deaths/cancer/overview">critical details</a> you need to know as you begin to understand what is going on in your body.</p>
<p>There will be much to learn and understand about the disease and prognosis; social, emotional, sexual and spiritual effects; treatments, therapies and their side-effects; work implications and how all these opportunities and challenges will be intertwined. </p>
<p>But you don’t need to do everything at once. In time, and with support, you’ll be able to move forward with poise, strength, calm and intelligence.</p>
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<p>
<em>
<strong>
Read more:
<a href="https://theconversation.com/cancer-is-rising-in-under-50s-but-the-causes-are-a-mystery-212834">Cancer is rising in under-50s – but the causes are a mystery</a>
</strong>
</em>
</p>
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<h2>Emotions will vary – from you and others</h2>
<p>Whatever your usual demeanour and emotional state, be ready for some surprises. This will be a period of uncertainty. Expect to find yourself experiencing the full gamut of reactions such as shock, anger, grief and guilt, along with warm and deep feelings of love, compassion and gratitude for the people and environment that surround you.</p>
<p>In the first few days, you might want to limit who you tell about your diagnosis or keep your news private to give yourself a chance to adjust without interference. Because, although well meaning, some people will react in unexpected ways and might cause you distress rather than be truly supportive or helpful. </p>
<p>Some people will be inclined to ask lots of questions, but you may not have all the answers. They might want to tell you other people’s stories, which you might not want or be ready to hear yet.</p>
<figure class="align-center ">
<img alt="Person hugs their older relative" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/548202/original/file-20230914-19-b2fa7s.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/548202/original/file-20230914-19-b2fa7s.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/548202/original/file-20230914-19-b2fa7s.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/548202/original/file-20230914-19-b2fa7s.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/548202/original/file-20230914-19-b2fa7s.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/548202/original/file-20230914-19-b2fa7s.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/548202/original/file-20230914-19-b2fa7s.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px">
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<span class="caption">In the first few days, you might want to limit who you tell.</span>
<span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://www.pexels.com/photo/woman-comforting-desperate-girlfriend-and-embracing-gently-6382530/">Liza Summer/Pexels</a></span>
</figcaption>
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<p>You have the option to completely accept the guidance of health-care professionals, who will give you the information they think you need at the time and direct you to further diagnostic tests and appointments.</p>
<p>However, you may want to know more about the type of cancer you have, the treatments being recommended, all possible side effects and seek out other sources. This will place the information you have received into perspective and will inform further questions. It is important to find <a href="https://www.cancer.org.au/cancer-information">resources</a> that are <a href="https://www.aihw.gov.au/reports-data/health-conditions-disability-deaths/cancer/overview">credible</a>.</p>
<h2>Continuing work might be beneficial</h2>
<p>For working people, the decision about returning to work will depend on how you feel and the flexibility of your workplace. </p>
<p>Assuming your body is up to it and it’s not a period where you will be immunosuppressed and susceptible to harmful effects of infections, work done at a steady pace is usually not only a boost to finances, but will have <a href="https://www.cancer.net/navigating-cancer-care/young-adults-and-teenagers/school-and-work-during-cancer/going-work-during-and-after-cancer#:%7E:text=You%20might%20work%20as%20much,support%2C%20including%20health%20insurance%20benefits">cognitive, social and emotional benefits</a>. </p>
<p>The strategy here is to do a risk assessment of your job. Specify the challenges and discuss how they could be reduced with your manager. If you are your own boss, be flexible and kind.</p>
<h2>Responding to cancer-related fatigue</h2>
<p>The most common side effect of living with cancer (before, during and after all types of treatment) is a specific kind of extreme tiredness and lethargy called cancer-related fatigue. </p>
<p>Sometimes it appears alongside <a href="https://www.canceraustralia.gov.au/clinical-best-practice/psychosocial-care">non-clinical depression and hopelessness</a>. Some people can feel so awful they decline medical treatment, but for the majority, this type of fatigue gets in the way of enjoying life.</p>
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<p>
<em>
<strong>
Read more:
<a href="https://theconversation.com/we-asked-chatgpt-and-dr-google-the-same-questions-about-cancer-heres-what-they-said-201474">We asked ChatGPT and Dr Google the same questions about cancer. Here's what they said</a>
</strong>
</em>
</p>
<hr>
<p>Research on the most effective interventions to reduce cancer-related fatigue has <a href="https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/20870636/">evaluated</a> a range of approaches, including medications and complementary therapies. Assuming the cause is not anaemia, which can be treated by a transfusion, the <a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK74155/">strongest evidence recommends</a> physical, moderately aerobic exercise, often defined as “enough to break a sweat”.</p>
<p>However, for those who are not able to exercise at a moderate level – for example, if the cancer has metastasised to bones or if lung capacity is compromised – less physically demanding approaches <a href="https://link.springer.com/chapter/10.1007/978-3-030-76932-1_4">can be valuable</a>. </p>
<h2>Prioritising things that bring you joy</h2>
<p>A “<a href="https://link.springer.com/book/10.1007/978-3-030-76932-1">joyful freedom</a>” approach to cancer-related fatigue aims to bring back vitality through subtle, lifestyle adjustments. It’s a framework researchers developed based on a series of studies.</p>
<p>The first task is to list activities that bring joy. Then categorise each joy according to five attributes of energy-restoring activities: </p>
<ul>
<li>purposeful</li>
<li>expansive</li>
<li>connecting</li>
<li>awe-inspiring </li>
<li>nourishing. </li>
</ul>
<p>This will raise awareness of how to best spend limited amounts of physical, emotional and cognitive energy.</p>
<p>Consider adding more of what brings joy into your life and remove some of the energy-depleting activities you do not enjoy. Making small changes can have a profound effect on your energy levels and give you the boost you need to live well with cancer.</p>
<p>In an ideal, well resourced national health service, GPs and specialist nurses would be available to provide holistic health promotion support for people with cancer. Realistically, this is rarely offered through mainstream public services. These services are more widely available in the private sector, or you may be able to find what you need through your <a href="https://www.cancer.org.au/">local Cancer Council</a>. </p>
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Read more:
<a href="https://theconversation.com/olivia-newton-john-gave-a-voice-to-those-with-cancer-and-shifted-the-focus-to-the-life-of-survivors-188444">Olivia Newton-John gave a voice to those with cancer and shifted the focus to the life of survivors</a>
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<img src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/211522/count.gif" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" />
<p class="fine-print"><em><span>Marilynne N Kirshbaum does not work for, consult, own shares in or receive funding from any company or organisation that would benefit from this article, and has disclosed no relevant affiliations beyond their academic appointment.</span></em></p>There’s a lot to learn, understand and organise when you receive a cancer diagnosis. But you don’t need to do it all at once.Marilynne N Kirshbaum, Professor and Chair of the Human Research Ethics Committee, Charles Darwin UniversityLicensed as Creative Commons – attribution, no derivatives.tag:theconversation.com,2011:article/2107892023-09-12T01:58:19Z2023-09-12T01:58:19ZApple wants to know if you’re happy or sad as part of its latest software update. Who will this benefit?<figure><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/547417/original/file-20230911-19-suu0bm.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&rect=3%2C21%2C2049%2C1221&q=45&auto=format&w=496&fit=clip" /><figcaption><span class="caption">
</span> <span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://www.apple.com/au/ios/health/">Apple/screenshot</a></span></figcaption></figure><p>Apple’s iOS 17 operating system is <a href="https://www.apple.com/au/newsroom/2023/06/apple-provides-powerful-insights-into-new-areas-of-health/">expected to drop</a> any day. The software update comes with several new features, including a tool for daily mood and emotion logging – a technique known to emotion researchers as “<a href="https://doi.org/10.1027/1015-5759/a000599">experience sampling</a>”.</p>
<p>Although there are caveats, certain <a href="https://doi.org/10.1017/S0033291717001659">mental health studies</a> have shown that regularly recording one’s feelings can be useful. However, given the vast amount of health data Apple already <a href="https://www.healthline.com/health-news/apple-wants-users-to-store-their-health-data-on-their-devices-is-it-a-good-idea">allows its customers</a> to record, why does it also want to record their subjective feelings? And how helpful might this be for users?</p>
<h2>How it works</h2>
<p>With the latest software update, Apple’s in-built <a href="https://www.apple.com/au/ios/health/">Health app</a> will allow iPhone, iPad and Apple Watch users to record how they feel on a sliding scale from “very unpleasant” to “very pleasant”. </p>
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<img alt="" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/541377/original/file-20230807-25-tiylg0.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/541377/original/file-20230807-25-tiylg0.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=600&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/541377/original/file-20230807-25-tiylg0.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=600&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/541377/original/file-20230807-25-tiylg0.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=600&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/541377/original/file-20230807-25-tiylg0.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=754&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/541377/original/file-20230807-25-tiylg0.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=754&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/541377/original/file-20230807-25-tiylg0.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=754&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px">
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<span class="caption">The emotion-tracking tool allows users to move a slider that changes the screen from purple (unpleasant), to blue/green (neutral), to orange (pleasant).</span>
<span class="attribution"><span class="source">Apple</span></span>
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<p>Users will then select from a list of adjectives to label their feelings and indicate which factors – including health, fitness, relationships, work, money and current events – have most influenced how they feel.</p>
<p>The goal is to give users daily and weekly summaries of their feelings, alongside data on factors that may have influenced them. Apple <a href="https://www.apple.com/au/ios/health/">claims this will</a> help users “build emotional awareness and resilience”. </p>
<h2>Why does Apple care about our feelings?</h2>
<p>Apple devices already collected copious amounts of health data prior to this update. The iPhone is equipped with an accelerometer, <a href="https://www.techtarget.com/whatis/definition/gyroscope">gyroscope</a>, light meter, microphone, camera and GPS, while the Apple Watch can also record skin temperature and heart rate. Why does Apple now want users to log how they feel as well?</p>
<p>Driven by a range of potential applications – from fraud detection to enhanced customer experience and personalised marketing - the emotion detection and recognition industry is projected to be worth <a href="https://www.businesswire.com/news/home/20200213005614/en">US$56 billion (A$86.9 billion) by 2024</a>. And Apple is <a href="https://www.reuters.com/article/us-emotient-m-a-apple-idUSKBN0UL27420160107">one of</a> numerous technology companies that have invested in trying to detect people’s emotions from sensor recordings.</p>
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Read more:
<a href="https://theconversation.com/imagine-if-technology-could-read-and-react-to-our-emotions-51107">Imagine if technology could read and react to our emotions</a>
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<p>However, <a href="https://www.nature.com/articles/d41586-020-00507-5">scientists are divided</a> over whether emotions can be inferred from such bodily signals. Research reviews suggest neither <a href="https://doi.org/10.1177/1529100619832930">facial expressions</a> nor <a href="https://doi.org/10.1037/bul0000128">physiological responses</a> can be used to reliably infer what emotions someone is experiencing. </p>
<p>By adding self-report to its methodological toolkit, Apple may be recognising that subjective experience is essential to <a href="https://doi.org/10.1080/02699931.2018.1515726">understanding human emotion</a> and, it seems, abandoning the goal of inferring emotions solely from “objective” data.</p>
<h2>The science behind experience sampling</h2>
<h1>Emotions versus moods</h1>
<p><br>
Apple’s new feature allows users to record their feelings “right now” (labelled emotions) or “overall today” (designated moods). Is this a valid distinction? </p>
<p>Although scientific consensus remains elusive, emotions are typically defined as being <a href="https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/10.1177/17540739221085573"><em>about</em> something</a>: I am angry <em>at</em> my boss <em>because</em> she rejected my proposal. On the other hand, moods are not consciously <a href="https://doi.org/10.1177/1754073909103594">tied to specific events</a>: I’m feeling grumpy, but I don’t know why.</p>
<p>Apple’s two reporting methods don’t neatly distinguish emotions from moods, even though they rely on <a href="https://doi.org/10.1037/0033-2909.128.6.934">different cognitive processes</a> that can produce divergent estimates <a href="https://doi.org/10.1037/pspp0000248">of people’s feelings</a>. </p>
<p>If the new feature allowed users to independently select both the time frame (momentary or daily) and type of feeling (directed emotion or diffuse mood) being experienced, this could help make users more aware of biases in how they remember feelings. It may even help people identify the often obscure causes of their moods. </p>
<h1>Dimensions of feeling</h1>
<p><br>
Apple’s feeling slider asks people how pleasant or unpleasant they feel. This captures the primary dimension of feeling, <a href="https://doi.org/10.1037/emo0000606">known as valence</a>, but neglects <a href="https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1467-9280.2007.02024.x">other essential dimensions</a>. </p>
<p>Moreover, scientists debate whether pleasantness and unpleasantness are opposite sides of a continuum, as the feature assumes, or whether they can co-occur as <a href="https://doi.org/10.1016/j.cobeha.2017.05.021">mixed emotions</a>. Measuring pleasant and unpleasant feelings separately would allow users to report mixed feelings, which are common <a href="https://doi.org/10.1371/journal.pone.0145450">in everyday life</a>. </p>
<p>Some research also suggests knowing how pleasant and unpleasant someone is feeling can be used to infer the second fundamental <a href="https://doi.org/10.1037/emo0000606">dimension of their feelings</a>, namely their <a href="https://doi.org/10.1177/0956797613475456">level of arousal</a> – such as how “tense” or “calm” they are.</p>
<h1>Feeling categories</h1>
<p><br>
After they have rated the valence of the feelings, Apple’s feature asks users to label their feelings using a list of adjectives such as “grateful”, “worried”, “happy” or “discouraged”. </p>
<p>Do these options capture the breadth of human feelings? The number of <a href="https://doi.org/10.1073/pnas.1702247114">unique emotion categories</a> – or whether discrete emotion categories <a href="https://doi.org/10.1016/j.tics.2017.12.004">exist at all</a> – is a topic of ongoing <a href="https://doi.org/10.31234/osf.io/gbqtc">scientific debate</a>. Yet, Apple’s initial list of feeling categories provides pretty decent coverage of this space. </p>
<h2>What are the benefits?</h2>
<p>Apple’s claim that mood and emotion tracking may improve users’ wellbeing is not unfounded. Research has shown monitoring and labelling feelings enhances people’s ability to <a href="https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jad.2018.10.092">differentiate between emotions</a>, and helps them <a href="https://doi.org/10.1177/1754073917742706">cope with distress</a>. Both of these are key ingredients for healthy psychological functioning. </p>
<p>Beyond that, emerging research suggests that patterns of moment-to-moment fluctuations in people’s everyday feelings may be useful in predicting who is <a href="https://doi.org/10.31234/osf.io/k5n7c">at risk of developing depression</a> or other mental illnesses. </p>
<p>Apple’s history of <a href="https://newsroom.ucla.edu/releases/ucla-launches-major-mental-health-study-to-discover-insights-about-depression">research collaboration</a> offers hope that tracking people’s feelings on a massive scale may lead to <a href="https://doi.org/10.1038/s41746-019-0121-1">scientific breakthroughs</a> in our understanding, treatment and prevention of common mental health disorders.</p>
<h2>What are the risks?</h2>
<p>At the same time, Apple is asking users to hand over yet more of their personal data – so we can’t overlook the potential pitfalls of the new feature.</p>
<p><a href="https://www.apple.com/au/ios/health/">Apple assures users</a> the Health app is “designed for privacy and security” with <a href="https://www.apple.com/au/ios/health/pdf/Health_Privacy_White_Paper_May_2023.pdf">a range of safeguards</a>, including data encryption and user control over data sharing. It guarantees health data “may not be used for advertising, marketing, or sold to data brokers”.</p>
<p>This may sound encouraging, but Apple’s data privacy record is <a href="https://gizmodo.com.au/2022/12/10-apple-privacy-problems-that-might-surprise-you/">far from perfect</a>. The company was recently fined by French authorities for <a href="https://gizmodo.com.au/2023/01/apple-fined-us8-5-12-for-illegally-collecting-iphone-owners-data-for-ads/">using customers’ data</a> for targeted advertising without consent. </p>
<p>Detailed data on users’ self-reported moods and emotions could also potentially be used for <a href="https://www.theguardian.com/technology/2019/aug/17/emotion-ai-artificial-intelligence-mood-realeyes-amazon-facebook-emotient">advertising products and services</a>, although Apple’s policy currently <a href="https://www.apple.com/au/ios/health/pdf/Health_Privacy_White_Paper_May_2023.pdf">forbids third-party apps</a> from doing this. </p>
<p>The <a href="https://right.ly/our-views-and-opinions/how-your-mental-health-data-and-information-sold-advertisers/">potential for misuse</a> and <a href="https://youtu.be/DtHt1BMpCXs">commodification</a> of sensitive mental health data is real, suggesting a <a href="https://www.choice.com.au/consumers-and-data/data-collection-and-use/how-your-data-is-used/articles/mental-health-apps">need for stricter regulation</a> over how companies collect, store and use customers’ data.</p>
<p>Before you dive into using mood and emotion-tracking features, we’d urge you to consider whether <a href="https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-030-50585-1_6">the risks</a> outweigh the potential benefits for you.</p>
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<p><em>Update: this article was updated following a response from an Apple spokesperson, to clarify that Apple does not access users’ Health data without their permission, and that third-party apps may not use users’ Health data for advertising or marketing</em>.</p><img src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/210789/count.gif" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" />
<p class="fine-print"><em><span>Peter Koval has received funding from the Australian Research Council. </span></em></p><p class="fine-print"><em><span>Greg Wadley receives funding from the Australian Research Council and the National Health and Medical Research Council.</span></em></p><p class="fine-print"><em><span>Benjamin Tag and Xanthe Lowe-Brown do not work for, consult, own shares in or receive funding from any company or organisation that would benefit from this article, and have disclosed no relevant affiliations beyond their academic appointment.</span></em></p>The iPhone already has an accelerometer, gyroscope, light meter, microphone, camera and GPS. Why does Apple now want you to tell it how you’re feeling?Peter Koval, Associate Professor of Psychology, The University of MelbourneBenjamin Tag, Lecturer, Monash UniversityGreg Wadley, Senior Lecturer, Computing and Information Systems, The University of MelbourneXanthe Lowe-Brown, PhD Student, The University of MelbourneLicensed as Creative Commons – attribution, no derivatives.tag:theconversation.com,2011:article/2108712023-09-05T12:32:35Z2023-09-05T12:32:35ZIf anxiety is in my brain, why is my heart pounding? A psychiatrist explains the neuroscience and physiology of fear<figure><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/545631/original/file-20230830-27-pr5ir8.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&rect=0%2C0%2C4429%2C1900&q=45&auto=format&w=496&fit=clip" /><figcaption><span class="caption">In the face of a perceived threat, your body often activates a fight-or-flight response.</span> <span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://www.gettyimages.com/detail/illustration/woman-with-shocked-facial-expression-royalty-free-illustration/1444323335">George Peters/DigitalVision Vectors via Getty Images</a></span></figcaption></figure><p><a href="https://theconversation.com/si-la-ansiedad-esta-en-mi-cerebro-por-que-me-late-el-corazon-un-psiquiatra-explica-la-neurociencia-y-la-fisiologia-del-miedo-213461">Leer en español</a>. </p>
<p>Heart in your throat. Butterflies in your stomach. Bad gut feeling. These are all phrases many people use to describe fear and anxiety. You have likely felt anxiety inside your chest or stomach, and your brain usually doesn’t hurt when you’re scared. Many cultures tie cowardice and bravery more <a href="https://afosa.org/the-meaning-of-heart-qalb-in-quran/">to the heart</a> <a href="https://byustudies.byu.edu/article/bowels-of-mercy/">or the guts</a> than to the brain.</p>
<p>But science has traditionally seen the brain as the birthplace and processing site of fear and anxiety. Then why and how do you feel these emotions in other parts of your body?</p>
<p>I am a <a href="https://scholar.google.com/citations?user=UDytFmIAAAAJ&hl=en">psychiatrist and neuroscientist</a> who researches and treats fear and anxiety. In my book “<a href="https://rowman.com/ISBN/9781538170380/Afraid-Understanding-the-Purpose-of-Fear-and-Harnessing-the-Power-of-Anxiety">Afraid,</a>” I explain how fear works in the brain and the body and what too much anxiety does to the body. Research confirms that while emotions do originate in your brain, it’s your body that carries out the orders.</p>
<h2>Fear and the brain</h2>
<p>While your brain evolved to save you from a falling rock or speeding predator, the anxieties of modern life are often a lot more abstract. Fifty-thousand years ago, being rejected by your tribe could mean death, but not doing a great job on a public speech at school or at work doesn’t have the same consequences. Your brain, however, <a href="https://doi.org/10.1006/nimg.2002.1179">might not know the difference</a>.</p>
<p>There are a few key areas of the brain that are heavily involved in processing fear.</p>
<p>When you perceive something as dangerous, whether it’s a gun pointed at you or a group of people looking unhappily at you, these sensory inputs are first relayed to <a href="https://doi.org/10.1038%2Fnpp.2009.121">the amygdala</a>. This small, almond-shaped area of the brain located near your ears detects salience, or the emotional relevance of a situation and how to react to it. When you see something, it determines whether you should eat it, attack it, run away from it or have sex with it.</p>
<p><a href="https://theconversation.com/the-science-of-fright-why-we-love-to-be-scared-85885">Threat detection</a> is a vital part of this process, and it has to be fast. Early humans did not have much time to think when a lion was lunging toward them. They had to act quickly. For this reason, the amygdala evolved to bypass brain areas involved in logical thinking and can directly engage physical responses. For example, seeing an angry face on a computer screen can immediately trigger a <a href="https://doi.org/10.1006/nimg.2002.1179">detectable response from the amygdala</a> without the viewer even being aware of this reaction.</p>
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<figcaption><span class="caption">In response to a looming threat, mammals often fight, flee or freeze.</span></figcaption>
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<p><a href="https://doi.org/10.1038/npp.2009.83">The hippocampus</a> is near and tightly connected to the amygdala. It’s involved in memorizing what is safe and what is dangerous, especially in relation to the environment – it puts fear in context. For example, seeing an angry lion in the zoo and in the Sahara both trigger a fear response in the amygdala. But the hippocampus steps in and blocks this response when you’re at the zoo because you aren’t in danger. </p>
<p>The <a href="https://doi.org/10.1176/appi.ajp.2016.16030353">prefrontal cortex</a>, located above your eyes, is mostly involved in the cognitive and social aspects of fear processing. For example, you might be scared of a snake until you read a sign that the snake is nonpoisonous or the owner tells you it’s their friendly pet. </p>
<p>Although the prefrontal cortex is usually seen as the part of the brain that regulates emotions, it can also teach you fear based on your social environment. For example, you might feel neutral about a meeting with your boss but immediately feel nervous when a colleague tells you about rumors of layoffs. Many <a href="https://theconversation.com/trump-the-politics-of-fear-and-racism-how-our-brains-can-be-manipulated-to-tribalism-139811">prejudices like racism</a> are rooted in learning fear through tribalism.</p>
<h2>Fear and the rest of the body</h2>
<p>If your brain decides that a fear response is justified in a particular situation, it activates a <a href="https://doi.org/10.1093/med/9780190259440.003.0019">cascade of neuronal and hormonal pathways</a> to prepare you for immediate action. Some of the fight-or-flight response – like heightened attention and threat detection – takes place in the brain. But the body is where most of the action happens.</p>
<p>Several pathways prepare different body systems for intense physical action. The <a href="https://doi.org/10.3389/fnins.2014.00043">motor cortex</a> of the brain sends rapid signals to your muscles to prepare them for quick and forceful movements. These include muscles in the chest and stomach that help protect vital organs in those areas. That might contribute to a feeling of tightness in your chest and stomach in stressful conditions.</p>
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<figcaption><span class="caption">Your sympathetic nervous system is involved in regulating stress.</span></figcaption>
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<p>The <a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK542195/">sympathetic nervous system</a> is the gas pedal that speeds up the systems involved in fight or flight. Sympathetic neurons are spread throughout the body and are especially dense in places like the heart, lungs and intestines. These neurons trigger the adrenal gland to release hormones like adrenaline that travel through the blood to reach those organs and increase the rate at which they undergo the fear response.</p>
<p>To assure sufficient blood supply to your muscles when they’re in high demand, signals from the sympathetic nervous system increase the rate your heart beats and the force with which it contracts. You feel both increased heart rate and contraction force in your chest, which is why you may connect the feeling of intense emotions to your heart.</p>
<p>In your lungs, signals from the sympathetic nervous system dilate airways and often increase your breathing rate and depth. Sometimes this results in a feeling of <a href="https://theconversation.com/pain-and-anxiety-are-linked-to-breathing-in-mouse-brains-suggesting-a-potential-target-to-prevent-opioid-overdose-deaths-174187">shortness of breath</a>.</p>
<p>As digestion is the last priority during a fight-or-flight situation, sympathetic activation slows down your gut and reduces blood flow to your stomach to save oxygen and nutrients for more vital organs like the heart and the brain. These changes to your gastrointestinal system can be perceived as the discomfort linked to fear and anxiety.</p>
<h2>It all goes back to the brain</h2>
<p>All bodily sensations, including those visceral feelings from your chest and stomach, are relayed back to the brain through the pathways <a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK555915/">via the spinal cord</a>. Your already anxious and highly alert brain then processes these signals at both conscious and unconscious levels.</p>
<p><a href="https://doi.org/10.1176/appi.ajp.2016.16030353">The insula</a> is a part of the brain specifically involved in conscious awareness of your emotions, pain and bodily sensations. The <a href="https://doi.org/10.1038%2Fs41598-019-52776-4">prefrontal cortex</a> also engages in self-awareness, especially by labeling and naming these physical sensations, like feeling tightness or pain in your stomach, and attributing cognitive value to them, like “this is fine and will go away” or “this is terrible and I am dying.” These physical sensations can sometimes create a loop of increasing anxiety as they make the brain feel more scared of the situation because of the turmoil it senses in the body.</p>
<p>Although the feelings of fear and anxiety start in your brain, you also feel them in your body because your brain alters your bodily functions. Emotions take place in both your body and your brain, but you become aware of their existence with your brain. As the rapper Eminem recounted in his song “Lose Yourself,” the reason his palms were sweaty, his knees weak and his arms heavy was because his brain was nervous.</p><img src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/210871/count.gif" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" />
<p class="fine-print"><em><span>Arash Javanbakht does not work for, consult, own shares in or receive funding from any company or organization that would benefit from this article, and has disclosed no relevant affiliations beyond their academic appointment.</span></em></p>Although emotions like fear and anxiety originate in your brain, they ultimately travel through your body and make your heart race and your stomach twist.Arash Javanbakht, Associate Professor of Psychiatry, Wayne State UniversityLicensed as Creative Commons – attribution, no derivatives.tag:theconversation.com,2011:article/2090042023-08-18T10:06:20Z2023-08-18T10:06:20ZHow tracking menopause symptoms can give women more control over their health<figure><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/540127/original/file-20230731-234595-td2ntl.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&rect=32%2C5%2C3566%2C2343&q=45&auto=format&w=496&fit=clip" /><figcaption><span class="caption">You can track your menopause symptoms by using an app, a dedicated website or a diary. </span> <span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://www.shutterstock.com/image-photo/ny-usa-2-may2022young-fitness-woman-2157077103">Krotnakro/Shutterstock</a></span></figcaption></figure><p>Menopause can cause more symptoms than hot flushes alone. And some of your symptoms and reactions might be due to the menopause, even if you are still having periods. Research shows that keeping track of those symptoms can help to alleviate them.</p>
<p>People sometimes talk about the menopause as though it were a single event that happens when you are in your early 50s, which is <a href="https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/menopause/symptoms-causes/syc-20353397#:%7E:text=Menopause%20is%20the%20time%20that,is%20a%20natural%20biological%20process.">the average time</a> to have your last period. But the menopause generally stretches between the ages of 45 and 55. And some women will experience an earlier “medical” menopause because of surgery to remove the womb or ovaries. </p>
<p>The menopause often happens at one of the busiest times of life. You might have teenagers at home or be supporting grown-up children, have elderly parents, be employed and have a great social life. If you feel exhausted, hot and bothered, irritable and can’t sleep well, you might be tempted to think that it is because you never get a minute’s peace. But that is why monitoring symptoms is important.</p>
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<img alt="A word cloud displaying the symptoms of menopause." src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/540140/original/file-20230731-191965-x8735z.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/540140/original/file-20230731-191965-x8735z.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=403&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/540140/original/file-20230731-191965-x8735z.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=403&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/540140/original/file-20230731-191965-x8735z.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=403&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/540140/original/file-20230731-191965-x8735z.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=506&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/540140/original/file-20230731-191965-x8735z.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=506&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/540140/original/file-20230731-191965-x8735z.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=506&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px">
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<span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://www.shutterstock.com/image-vector/menopause-symptoms-tags-cloud-estrogen-level-1017507085">Double Brain/Shutterstock</a></span>
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<p><a href="https://journals.lww.com/menopausejournal/Abstract/2023/03000/Symptom_monitoring_improves_physical_and_emotional.7.aspx">My team recently tested</a> the effects of tracking symptoms and emotions during the menopause. We asked women to rate 30 physical and 20 emotional symptoms of the menopause. </p>
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<p><em>This article is part of <a href="https://theconversation.com/uk/topics/womens-health-matters-143335">Women’s Health Matters</a>, a series about the health and wellbeing of women and girls around the world. From menopause to miscarriage, pleasure to pain the articles in this series will delve into the full spectrum of women’s health issues to provide valuable information, insights and resources for women of all ages.</em></p>
<p><em>You may be interested in:</em></p>
<p><em><a href="https://theconversation.com/five-old-contraception-methods-that-show-why-the-pill-was-a-medical-breakthrough-207572">Five old contraception methods that show why the pill was a medical breakthrough
</a></em></p>
<p><em><a href="https://theconversation.com/the-orgasm-gap-and-why-women-climax-less-than-men-208614">The orgasm gap and why women climax less than men</a></em></p>
<p><em><a href="https://theconversation.com/science-experiments-traditionally-only-used-male-mice-heres-why-thats-a-problem-for-womens-health-205963">Science experiments traditionally only used male mice – here’s why that’s a problem for women’s health</a></em></p>
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<p>The physical and psychological symptoms included poor concentration, problems with digesting food, stress and itchy skin, as well as the obvious symptoms like hot flushes and night sweats. Women tracked positive emotions like happiness and contentment, and negative emotions like feeling sad, isolated and angry.</p>
<p>There were two groups of women in this study. One group recorded their symptoms and emotions every day for two weeks. The other group recorded their symptoms and emotions once at the beginning of the fortnight and once at the end. </p>
<p>The results showed that the women who monitored their symptoms and emotions every day reported much lower negative emotions, physical symptoms and loneliness at the end of two weeks than at the beginning, compared to the other group. </p>
<p>As well as this, although the loneliness scores of the group who monitored every day were lower than the other group, women in both groups said that being in the study and thinking about symptoms helped them feel less lonely. Simply knowing that other women were having similar experiences seemed to help. </p>
<p>One participant said: “I feel more normal that other women are doing the same survey and are probably experiencing similar issues, especially the emotional and mental ones.” </p>
<h2>Why does monitoring symptoms help?</h2>
<p>One reason why tracking might help is that rating symptoms can help you notice changes and patterns in how you feel. This could encourage you to seek help. </p>
<p>Another reason is that noticing changes in symptoms might help you link the change to what you have been doing. For example, looking at whether symptoms spike after eating certain foods or are better after exercise. This could mean that you change your behaviour in ways that improve your symptoms.</p>
<p>Many menopause symptoms are known as “non-specific” symptoms. This is because they can also be symptoms of mental health, thyroid or heart problems. It is important not to think your symptoms are “just” the menopause. You should always speak to your doctor if you are worried about your health. </p>
<p>Another good thing about monitoring symptoms is that you can take information about how often you experience symptoms and how bad they are to your GP appointment. This can help the doctor decide what might be the problem. </p>
<p>Websites such as <a href="https://healthandher.com">Health and Her</a> and <a href="https://www.balance-menopause.com">Balance</a> offer symptom monitoring tools that can help you track what is happening to your physical and emotional health. There are several apps you can use on your phone, too. Or you might prefer to note symptoms and how bad they are in a notebook every day.</p><img src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/209004/count.gif" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" />
<p class="fine-print"><em><span>Deborah Lancastle consults to Gedeon Richter, Theramex, Merck Serono and Health and Her. The links with Theramex and Merck Serono are prior to 2020.
She has received honoraria and expenses from Gedeon Richter, Theramex, and Merck Serono for presentations and CPD events. The menopausal symptom monitoring research was funded by a KESS studentship for my PhD student (Robin Andrews), which included company partner funding from Health and Her, and I have provided web-support articles for Health and Her. The studies discussed in this article did not involve Health and Her clients and was not administered via the Health and Her organisation. Health and Her were not involved in the analysis or write up of the studies discussed in this article. </span></em></p>Tracking the many physical and emotional symptoms of menopause with a website, app or diary can help women better monitor their health.Deborah Lancastle, Associate Professor of Psychology, University of South WalesLicensed as Creative Commons – attribution, no derivatives.tag:theconversation.com,2011:article/2115262023-08-15T20:03:41Z2023-08-15T20:03:41ZConnection, camaraderie and belonging: why the Matildas could be making you a sports fan for the very first time<p>With over seven million Australians hooked onto the world cup viewing, many who have never really been interested in sports have recently found themselves screaming at the TV, cheering in pubs and hugging complete strangers.</p>
<p>Have you found yourself in this new legion of sports fans, and wondering how you got here?</p>
<p>It is likely down to many factors. There is of course the incredible talent on display, the <a href="https://www.9news.com.au/national/world-cup-2023-matildas-captain-sam-kerr-gives-prized-gameworn-top-to-young-fan/b9e35f75-6d11-4148-af3a-ac3cd0c95c0c">kindness</a> players are showing on and off the field, and women and girls relating to players <a href="https://www.abc.net.au/news/2023-08-15/matildas-world-cup-sam-kerr-mary-fowler-inspire-diverse-fans/102713288">who look like them</a>.</p>
<p>But it is also to do with the visibility and exposure of the game; the influence of our families and friends; the ways we are hardwired for connection; and the addictive nature of neurotransmitters.</p>
<p>Like many Australians, we will be sure to not miss tonight’s game when Australia plays England in the semifinal – but first, here’s a look at all of these new emotions you may be experiencing.</p>
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Read more:
<a href="https://theconversation.com/from-handing-out-their-own-flyers-to-sell-out-games-how-the-matildas-won-over-a-nation-211338">From handing out their own flyers, to sell-out games: how the Matildas won over a nation</a>
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<h2>The social contagion</h2>
<p>With Australia as a host nation – and the incredible success of the Matildas – there has never been more visibility and focus on women’s football in Australia. </p>
<p>Positive emotions and behaviours are contagious. Psychologists refer to “<a href="https://positivepsychology.com/emotional-contagion/">emotional contagion</a>” or “social contagion”, which describes how emotions, attitudes and behaviours spread through groups and crowds. </p>
<p>In general, people just want to feel good! We enhance that feeling by forming positive social connections with other humans, sharing in a common experience, having a common goal and putting aside our differences. </p>
<p>Being on the same side means we have something to share and celebrate in and, more importantly, someone to do it with. </p>
<p>You’re likely feeling like you are part of something greater, and that has us all reaching for more by getting together to watch the next game.</p>
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<p>Another reason you might find yourself getting behind the world cup is everyone loves a good story – and this competition has them in spades.</p>
<p>This world cup has had its share of ups and downs: superstar Sam Kerr’s injury; the crushing low of defeat to Nigeria; the high of the must-win-game against Canada; the electric edge-of-your-seat drama of the penalty shootout against France. </p>
<p>We all share in these highs and lows.</p>
<p>Sports can help <a href="https://doi.org/10.3390/socsci11110513">create positive social cohesion</a> by bringing people together. There is something very comforting about winning or losing as a group - whatever the result, we aren’t doing it alone! </p>
<p>Sports <a href="https://www.huffpost.com/entry/how-sport-can-break-down_b_7927724">breaks down barriers</a>, forms <a href="https://doi.org/10.3390/socsci11110513">pro-social bonds</a> and <a href="https://www.weforum.org/agenda/2018/02/north-and-south-korea-have-shown-us-the-unifying-power-of-sport/">helps people unite</a> through a common goal. We get lost and escape into a world of togetherness, which feels great! </p>
<p>The ability to laugh, cry or hold hands with people (both strangers and friends) in nervous moments is felt deep in our body. It is undeniable, palpable and reinforces our connectivity. These heightened emotions fast track our sense of belonging to a group. </p>
<p>Meanwhile, there is something very primitive going on deep in the brain that may explain this phenomenon.</p>
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<p>Our brains <a href="https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/why-we-are-wired-to-connect/#">are wired</a> to work in groups or tribes. Historically, working together towards a common goal improved our ability to survive.</p>
<p>In a contemporary setting, when we belong to groups we unite through the notion of achieving a common vision. The “self” blends with the social. We evaluate our environment and look for links of commonality to achieve social harmony. </p>
<p>This comes back to the notion of feeling good. When you are sharing a sporting event – watching together or talking about it after – you are sharing a safe space you can relate, engage and belong to.</p>
<h2>Shared experiences</h2>
<p>The reality of what sports can do to unite and change the way we connect is palpable through this world cup. </p>
<p>We are all sharing a common experience which enables us to talk to complete strangers at the bus stop, on the train and when we are ordering our coffees at the local café. </p>
<p>This shared experience enables us the confidence to strike up new conversations: sharing our pride, our fears and our emotions. </p>
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<p>We fast track our connections with people through sharing our vulnerabilities. Connections that could generally take years to form are happening in seconds. The moments to form those connections are more frequent as the success of our team continues. </p>
<p>Matilda’s defender Claire Hunt <a href="https://www.matildas.com.au/video/230810huntpresser">spoke</a> of the collective belief the team has in their abilities. This collective belief has spread out from the team and their diehard supporters to become a source of national pride.</p>
<h2>We belong</h2>
<p>Sports creates a connection to something greater than yourself, an ability to ride the highs and lows of a team as you journey with them for the entire match! </p>
<p>Notice the feeling of your heart beating through your chest (and that feedback coming through your smart watch as the high pulse rate alert is screaming at you!); feeling like you want to vomit and cry from the anticipation; the <a href="https://www.apa.org/monitor/oct05/mirror">tensing of your muscles</a> during every attempt at goal.</p>
<p>Through Australia’s collective love, support and excitement behind the Matildas, we are in the process of forming our identity and becoming part of a family. </p>
<p>We relate to people, we connect to people, we belong. </p>
<p><div data-react-class="Tweet" data-react-props="{"tweetId":"1690302576405991424"}"></div></p>
<p>These feelings have powerful effects on our wellbeing. Belonging <a href="https://www.taylorfrancis.com/chapters/edit/10.4324/9780203148211-19/role-emotion-engagement-coping-development-motivational-resilience-ellen-skinner-jennifer-pitzer-heather-brule">enhances self-esteem</a>, improves <a href="https://doi.org/10.1177/0146167213499186">psychological and behavioural functioning</a>, and improves <a href="https://psychology.org.au/for-members/publications/inpsych/2019/june/making-sense-of-belonging">the quality and meaning</a> of our lives. </p>
<p>As our energy starts to rise, we begin to release <a href="https://www.healthline.com/health/happy-hormone">positive endorphins</a> such as serotonin, dopamine and adrenaline. Dopamine <a href="https://www.health.harvard.edu/mind-and-mood/dopamine-the-pathway-to-pleasure">enhances</a> our feelings of pleasure, satisfaction and motivation. Adrenaline <a href="https://www.healthline.com/health/adrenaline-junkie">makes you feel alive</a>. These neurotransmitters increase our sense of wellbeing.</p>
<p>They are addictive and we are left feeling that we want more. </p>
<p>Even as a newly minted fan, you are now part of the Matilda’s family and they’re counting on the Aussie social contagion to push through those cramping muscles, tired bodies and sweaty palms. </p>
<p>You are about to be a part of history and those neurotransmitters won’t want to miss it for the world!</p>
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<strong>
Read more:
<a href="https://theconversation.com/5-ways-to-protect-your-voice-while-barracking-for-the-matildas-and-how-to-treat-a-hoarse-voice-after-211499">5 ways to protect your voice while barracking for the Matildas – and how to treat a hoarse voice after</a>
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<img src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/211526/count.gif" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" />
<p class="fine-print"><em><span>The authors do not work for, consult, own shares in or receive funding from any company or organisation that would benefit from this article, and have disclosed no relevant affiliations beyond their academic appointment.</span></em></p>Have you found yourself liking sport for the first time and wondering how you got here? Here’s what might be going on – and why it might be the best thing for your wellbeing.Sarah Tillott, Senior Lecturer, Faculty of Health, Southern Cross UniversityDiarmuid Hurley, Lecturer, Faculty of Health, Southern Cross UniversityLicensed as Creative Commons – attribution, no derivatives.tag:theconversation.com,2011:article/2096362023-07-17T16:05:23Z2023-07-17T16:05:23ZHow childhood trauma can lead to obesity in people with serious mental illness<figure><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/537128/original/file-20230712-24-tjrwvy.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&rect=0%2C6%2C4031%2C2257&q=45&auto=format&w=496&fit=clip" /><figcaption><span class="caption">Research suggests childhood trauma has a big part to play in obesity.</span> <span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://www.shutterstock.com/image-photo/silhouette-woman-sitting-on-bed-beside-1439614217">Ken stocker/Shutterstock</a></span></figcaption></figure><p>People with a serious mental illness (SMI), like schizophrenia, often experience obesity. And in the UK, such people are almost <a href="https://www.gov.uk/government/publications/severe-mental-illness-smi-physical-health-inequalities/severe-mental-illness-and-physical-health-inequalities-briefing#:%7E:text=This%20analysis%20shows%20that%20compared,the%20difference%20is%20not%20significant">twice as likely</a> to be obese compared to those without a diagnosis. </p>
<p>People with SMI also have a greater risk of having other obesity related illnesses such as type 2 diabetes, respiratory disease, cardiovascular disease and heart failure. The result is a life expectancy that is <a href="https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/28237639/">15 years less than</a> the general population. </p>
<p>Many experts believe the greater risk of obesity is due to the medications used to treat mental illness. Antipsychotics, for example, have <a href="https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/37159349/">frequently been shown</a> to impact body weight. </p>
<p>But that explanation does not consider the role that deeper psychological factors play in obesity. There is a body of research that suggests childhood trauma <a href="https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/33506595/">has a big part to play</a> too.</p>
<h2>Psychological trauma and obesity</h2>
<p>Psychologists often refer to the trauma experienced in childhood as “adverse childhood experiences” (ACEs). Such experiences include abuse and neglect (both physical and emotional), mental illness and substance abuse in the home, witnessing domestic abuse and having an incarcerated relative. </p>
<p>This type of trauma is <a href="https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s00787-021-01938-9">strongly associated</a> with the development of mental illnesses in later life. This may explain why many people who are treated in psychiatric hospitals have had such experiences. For example, <a href="https://nccu.nhs.wales/qais/national-reviews/making-days-count/mdc-documents/making-days-count1/">70% of people</a> in forensic psychiatric hospitals have at least one ACE, compared to 47% of the population of Wales. </p>
<p>Research also shows trauma can effect the way people behave. A <a href="https://academic.oup.com/eurpub/article/26/suppl_1/ckw167.009/2448496">recent study</a> found someone who has experienced four or more adverse childhood experiences is twice as likely to have an unhealthy diet. This may explain why there is a <a href="https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S003193842030278X?ref=pdf_download&fr=RR-2&rr=7e5964419ba4730c">46% increase</a> in the odds of adult obesity following exposure to multiple ACEs. </p>
<p>Despite this knowledge, however, little attention is paid by policymakers to the impact childhood trauma can have on obesity in people with serious mental illness. </p>
<p>Why is it that people who experience trauma in childhood have a greater risk of being obese? It is well known that people who have experienced traumatic childhoods engage in behaviour that isn’t particularly healthy, such as self-harming, abusing drugs and binge eating. These people do this as a form of avoidance, to distract themselves from the difficult thoughts and feelings they experience. </p>
<p>The term used to describe this behaviour is <a href="https://www.verywellmind.com/experiential-avoidance-2797358#:%7E:text=Experiential%20avoidance%20is%20an%20attempt,in%20contact%20with%20internal%20experiences.">“experiential avoidance”</a>.</p>
<h2>Eating our emotions</h2>
<p>Experiential avoidance can take many forms, but a common method is emotional eating, which is the tendency to eat in response to negative emotions. It is associated with the consumption of tasty food that is high in calories. </p>
<p>When someone emotionally eats, they can experience the numbing of intense negative emotion, can be distracted and <a href="https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s40519-016-0301-9">feel a sense of comfort</a>. This is because when we eat food with lots of fat and sugar, it activates the reward and pleasure areas centres of the brain. Eating foods high in fats and sugar is fine in moderation, of course. But the positive effects of eating tasty, high calorie foods are often short lived. </p>
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<img alt="A selection of food, including chips, doughnuts, ice cream and cakes are laid out on a blue table." src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/537485/original/file-20230714-25-kx7uff.jpeg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/537485/original/file-20230714-25-kx7uff.jpeg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/537485/original/file-20230714-25-kx7uff.jpeg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/537485/original/file-20230714-25-kx7uff.jpeg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/537485/original/file-20230714-25-kx7uff.jpeg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/537485/original/file-20230714-25-kx7uff.jpeg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/537485/original/file-20230714-25-kx7uff.jpeg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px">
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<span class="caption">Eating food high in sugar and fat activates the reward and pleasure areas centres of our brain.</span>
<span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://www.shutterstock.com/image-photo/unhealthy-products-food-bad-figure-skin-1062629861">beats1/Shutterstock</a></span>
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<p>So, people who engage in experiential avoidance may rely on these foods and consume them to excess. This, <a href="https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0195666315001397?casa_token=-bqvrnAs3uIAAAAA:KJr48KBwRoU3lPcRkV-OOURVvgJ78F8gUnEkMxsNrcEVRqt3j0-esBpn5kBS_uoTjbvazswR3PQ">according to research</a>, is what can lead to weight gain and obesity. </p>
<p>Currently, the <a href="https://www.nice.org.uk/sharedlearning/improving-physical-health-for-people-with-serious-mental-illness-smi">treatment guidelines</a> for people with SMI do not consider the impact that ACEs can have on obesity in this group of people. This is probably due to the emphasis placed on antipsychotic drugs as the main contributor to excessive weight gain. </p>
<p>And despite the negative impact that obesity can have on people with a serious mental illness, psychiatric services often <a href="https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1111/j.1600-0447.2008.01211.x">overlook physical health issues</a> because some psychiatric staff feel they are <a href="https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1111/j.1747-0080.2011.01568.x">not adequately trained</a> to deal with the physical health of their patients.</p>
<p>To improve physical health in people with a serious mental illness, it is important that mental health professionals and policymakers consider the impact that psychological trauma has on obesity in this group of people. </p>
<p>Promoting a trauma-informed approach to both psychiatric and physical health care is vital. In essence, this would involve care teams having a <a href="https://www.traumainformedcare.chcs.org/what-is-trauma-informed-care/">complete picture</a> of their patient, mentally and physically, and providing adequate training around the impact that psychological trauma can have on a person’s behaviour.</p><img src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/209636/count.gif" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" />
<p class="fine-print"><em><span>Joseph Lloyd Davies does not work for, consult, own shares in or receive funding from any company or organisation that would benefit from this article, and has disclosed no relevant affiliations beyond their academic appointment.</span></em></p>Deep psychological factors play a part in obesity, including childhood trauma.Joseph Lloyd Davies, Lecturer in Applied Psychology, Cardiff Metropolitan UniversityLicensed as Creative Commons – attribution, no derivatives.tag:theconversation.com,2011:article/2074302023-06-27T20:07:43Z2023-06-27T20:07:43Z‘He was horrific!’: Nearly two thirds of family historians are distressed by what they find – should DNA kits come with warnings?<figure><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/533425/original/file-20230622-27-w44tuc.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&rect=14%2C0%2C4889%2C3257&q=45&auto=format&w=496&fit=clip" /><figcaption><span class="caption">
</span> <span class="attribution"><span class="source">Cheryl Winn-Boujnida/Unsplash</span>, <a class="license" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/">CC BY</a></span></figcaption></figure><p>In 1853, my great great grandmother Charlotte died giving birth to her 13th child, in a tent on the banks of the Yarra River in what is now South Melbourne – but was then an overcrowded, muddy hellhole known as <a href="https://blogs.slv.vic.gov.au/our-stories/canvas-town-a-floating-city-devoured-by-the-sun/">Canvas Town</a>. The baby, William, died shortly afterwards. Researching Charlotte’s story made me both sad for her loss and angry at the powerlessness of women’s lives then. </p>
<p>I’m not the only one to have experienced intense emotions – both negative and positive – while researching my forebears. </p>
<p>On Facebook pages, in <a href="https://time.com/5492642/dna-test-results-family-secret-biological-father/">media stories</a> and <a href="https://www.sbs.com.au/ondemand/tv-series/who-do-you-think-you-are">on TV</a>, you’ll find a flood of hobby genealogists discovering shocking things about their ancestors – or even their own identity.</p>
<p>My recent research revealed about two thirds of family historians have experienced <a href="https://www.mdpi.com/2313-5778/7/2/26">strong negative emotions</a> like sorrow or anger through their hobby.</p>
<p>And nearly all respondents had experienced strong positive emotions such as joy or pride.</p>
<h2>Passionate ‘kin keepers’</h2>
<p>In 2019, Doreen Rosenthal and I surveyed 775 Australian hobbyist family historians to examine their <a href="https://www.routledge.com/The-Psychology-of-Family-History-Exploring-Our-Genealogy/Moore-Rosenthal-Robinson/p/book/9780367820428">motivations</a>.</p>
<p>They were adults aged between 21 and 93, but most were older and the median age was 63. The majority (85%) were women. This seems to be typical of hobbyist family historians. Women often take on the role of “kin keeper” – and have the time to devote to it when they’ve finished rearing children and have retired from paid work. </p>
<figure class="align-center zoomable">
<a href="https://images.theconversation.com/files/533439/original/file-20230622-21-1n45fx.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=1000&fit=clip"><img alt="" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/533439/original/file-20230622-21-1n45fx.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/533439/original/file-20230622-21-1n45fx.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=345&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/533439/original/file-20230622-21-1n45fx.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=345&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/533439/original/file-20230622-21-1n45fx.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=345&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/533439/original/file-20230622-21-1n45fx.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=434&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/533439/original/file-20230622-21-1n45fx.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=434&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/533439/original/file-20230622-21-1n45fx.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=434&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px"></a>
<figcaption>
<span class="caption">Most family historians are older women.</span>
<span class="attribution"><span class="source">Moe Magners/Pexels</span>, <a class="license" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/">CC BY</a></span>
</figcaption>
</figure>
<p>Survey respondents described why they were passionately engaged with their hobby – and how it made them feel. Some 48% “sometimes” felt strong negative emotions about what they found, while 15% did “often”.</p>
<p>There were five common distress triggers.</p>
<h2>1. Ancestors behaving badly</h2>
<p>The first and most common distress trigger was the discovery of ancestors who had behaved badly – either as individuals, or by profiting from unjust social conditions. Finding these forebears made family historians feel confronted, shocked and sometimes ashamed. </p>
<p>They said things like: </p>
<blockquote>
<p>[The worst thing was] finding the bigamist! He was horrific!! Very confronting thinking that I have some of his blood in my veins!</p>
</blockquote>
<p>And:</p>
<blockquote>
<p>[It was] difficult finding that ancestors may have been involved in unsavoury behaviours or events. The problem is trying to understand the context of how they were able to do things that are socially and legally unacceptable today and not things I can be proud of.</p>
</blockquote>
<hr>
<p>
<em>
<strong>
Read more:
<a href="https://theconversation.com/truth-telling-and-giving-back-how-settler-colonials-are-coming-to-terms-with-painful-family-histories-145165">Truth telling and giving back: how settler colonials are coming to terms with painful family histories</a>
</strong>
</em>
</p>
<hr>
<h2>2. Ancestors treated cruelly</h2>
<p>It was also distressing to discover ancestors who had been cruelly treated. This elicited disturbing, even “heartbreaking” feelings – and, at least implicitly, indignation at injustice. Many were deeply moved by what their ancestors experienced. </p>
<p>As one survey respondent put it:</p>
<blockquote>
<p>What is unexpected is the relationships that can be formed with those who are no longer with us. That I can be moved by the plight of my paternal step great great grandmother who was incarcerated in a mental institution from 1913 to 1948 without review, without visitors, to get her out of the way.</p>
</blockquote>
<h2>3. Sad stories</h2>
<p>Sadness was often specifically mentioned. As in the case of my great great grandmother who died in childbirth, sadness was usually a response to the hardships and tragedies ancestors faced in more challenging times. </p>
<p>Women commonly did not survive childbirth, neonatal deaths were frequent, people died of diseases medical science has now conquered. Poverty was rife and war a constant threat. </p>
<blockquote>
<p>[It was difficult] discovering the tragedies encountered by my Irish ancestors who came to Australia and their struggles and heartbreaking stories of survival for the next three generations.</p>
<p>[It is distressing] to uncover particularly sad and desperate times in some ancestors’ lives. For example, a destitute widow who admitted her child to an orphan asylum for three years, only to have her child die of typhoid fever within two weeks of returning home.</p>
</blockquote>
<figure class="align-center zoomable">
<a href="https://images.theconversation.com/files/533444/original/file-20230622-23-3c22fs.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=1000&fit=clip"><img alt="" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/533444/original/file-20230622-23-3c22fs.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/533444/original/file-20230622-23-3c22fs.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=407&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/533444/original/file-20230622-23-3c22fs.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=407&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/533444/original/file-20230622-23-3c22fs.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=407&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/533444/original/file-20230622-23-3c22fs.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=512&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/533444/original/file-20230622-23-3c22fs.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=512&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/533444/original/file-20230622-23-3c22fs.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=512&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px"></a>
<figcaption>
<span class="caption">Sadness was often mentioned by family researchers.</span>
<span class="attribution"><span class="source">Marcus Aurelius/Pexels</span>, <a class="license" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/">CC BY</a></span>
</figcaption>
</figure>
<h2>4. Family secrets and betrayal</h2>
<p>The fourth distress trigger was a belief by the family history researcher that they had been betrayed by other family members: through secrets, lies and feeling their lived experience was ignored or denied. </p>
<p>This is particularly likely for those who discover “secrets” about their parentage – for example, the late-life discovery of adoption, parental infidelity or previously unknown siblings. </p>
<p>Trust is damaged. If family members can lie about these important things, what else might they lie about? </p>
<p>As one woman commented:</p>
<blockquote>
<p>My mother’s half-sister did not accept that she shared a father with my mother. My great grandmother lied about who my grandfather’s father was. My great great grandmother also lied. All these lies were very distressing.</p>
</blockquote>
<hr>
<p>
<em>
<strong>
Read more:
<a href="https://theconversation.com/we-used-dna-from-beethovens-hair-to-shed-light-on-his-poor-health-and-stumbled-upon-a-family-secret-202440">We used DNA from Beethoven's hair to shed light on his poor health – and stumbled upon a family secret</a>
</strong>
</em>
</p>
<hr>
<h2>5. Moral dilemmas</h2>
<p>Finally, several respondents expressed doubt and confusion at the moral dilemmas they faced on discovering information that could greatly distress other living relatives. Should they tell or not? </p>
<p>An emotional burden attaches to withholding potentially distressing information of this kind. Yet there is also guilt and fear about the possible outcomes of sharing it. </p>
<blockquote>
<p>I knew an aunt had an illegitimate child before she married. Through DNA I found her granddaughter. I have yet to inform this girl who she is. I don’t feel it’s my right as she has absolutely no idea of any adoption of her father.</p>
<p>A really distressing find was that my great aunt’s husband had committed a terrible murder. I have not been able to speak about this with the descendants of the couple.</p>
</blockquote>
<hr>
<p>
<em>
<strong>
Read more:
<a href="https://theconversation.com/friday-essay-how-do-i-understand-who-i-am-when-my-family-have-hidden-themselves-from-recent-history-171393">Friday essay: how do I understand who I am, when my family have hidden themselves from recent history?</a>
</strong>
</em>
</p>
<hr>
<h2>Healthy outcomes from bad feelings</h2>
<p>Sometimes these distressing feelings can promote healthy, growth-enhancing outcomes. After the initial shock, some traumatic genealogical discoveries lead to a greater understanding of the past and its influence. </p>
<p>Placing ancestors’ maladaptive or distressing behaviours, or their misfortunes, into historical and social context can help with acceptance and forgiveness, and stimulate emotional healing and personal growth. </p>
<p>Initial feelings of distress about past injustices and tragedies are sometimes replaced by admiration for the strength and resilience of one’s forebears. This can positively influence personal wellbeing and resilience.</p>
<figure class="align-center zoomable">
<a href="https://images.theconversation.com/files/533448/original/file-20230622-27-4wg00v.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=1000&fit=clip"><img alt="" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/533448/original/file-20230622-27-4wg00v.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/533448/original/file-20230622-27-4wg00v.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=399&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/533448/original/file-20230622-27-4wg00v.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=399&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/533448/original/file-20230622-27-4wg00v.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=399&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/533448/original/file-20230622-27-4wg00v.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=502&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/533448/original/file-20230622-27-4wg00v.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=502&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/533448/original/file-20230622-27-4wg00v.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=502&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px"></a>
<figcaption>
<span class="caption">Processing distressing discoveries can lead to growth.</span>
<span class="attribution"><span class="source">Brett Sayles/Pexels</span>, <a class="license" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/">CC BY</a></span>
</figcaption>
</figure>
<h2>How can family and professionals help?</h2>
<p>I processed my great great grandmother’s story by writing it down and sharing it with family members. We reworked our sadness at her fate into a positive family narrative, emphasising her bravery and the strengths her surviving children showed. </p>
<p>Support can mean just disclosing these stories to family members, friends and other family historians. But for some, it may be helpful to discuss these topics privately with a counsellor or therapist, especially if they’ve led to a breakdown in family relationships or an assault on one’s sense of identity. </p>
<p>Counsellors and psychologists should develop strategies to support clients distressed by genealogical findings – and encourage them to use their new knowledge for personal growth and greater understanding of family dynamics. </p>
<p>Should providers of genealogical research products (especially DNA tests) educate their customers about their products’ potential to cause distress?</p>
<p>Trigger warnings might be overkill. But they could issue lists of support resources for those who are upset or disoriented by their findings.</p>
<p>As more people gain access to more genealogical data – with the potential to challenge identity and uncover family secrets – it’s worth thinking about.</p><img src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/207430/count.gif" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" />
<p class="fine-print"><em><span>Susan Moore does not work for, consult, own shares in or receive funding from any company or organisation that would benefit from this article, and has disclosed no relevant affiliations beyond their academic appointment.</span></em></p>Researching family history is a popular hobby. But hobbyists can find themselves unearthing details of ancestors behaving badly or treated cruelly – or family secrets and trauma.Susan Moore, Emeritus Professor, Faculty of Health, Arts and Design, Swinburne University of TechnologyLicensed as Creative Commons – attribution, no derivatives.tag:theconversation.com,2011:article/2030942023-05-22T17:13:35Z2023-05-22T17:13:35ZWhy surfing can be beneficial for people with brain injuries<figure><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/525093/original/file-20230509-17-idwc3m.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&rect=0%2C0%2C6596%2C3298&q=45&auto=format&w=496&fit=clip" /><figcaption><span class="caption">Surfing has a range of health benefits. </span> <span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://www.shutterstock.com/image-photo/unrecognizable-surfer-waling-into-ocean-focul-2274501199">BART SADOWSKI PL/Shutterstock</a></span></figcaption></figure><p>Nothing quite beats riding a wave for the first time. And our research suggests you don’t have to be a pro to benefit from the power of the sea. <a href="https://journals.plos.org/plosone/article?id=10.1371/journal.pone.0266388">We have found</a> that surfing can help people with brain injuries live more engaged and meaningful lives. </p>
<p>In addition to physical impairments, acquired brain injury can cause difficulties with processing information, regulating emotions and socialising. Many people with brain injuries can struggle to return to work or engage in exercise and can start to feel isolated. Critically, they don’t always have the confidence or connections required to engage with their local communities. </p>
<p><a href="https://doi.org/10.3389/fpsyg.2021.642093">We have been working</a> with a team of psychologists across different Welsh health boards to help survivors overcome these barriers and have studied the effects. </p>
<p>During our research, we teamed up with <a href="https://surfabilityukcic.org/">Surfability UK</a>, which is a surf school that aims to make the activity as inclusive as possible to disabled people. It offers adapted wetsuits, longer boards, beach buggies and developed the world’s first tandem seated surfboard to support those with mobility issues, including people with acquired brain injuries. </p>
<p>Accessing such opportunities can still be a challenge if you have a brain injury. So, to overcome this, psychologists join patients for a dip in the sea and provide them with therapeutic support in their wetsuits. </p>
<figure class="align-center ">
<img alt="Two people stand on a surfboard and ride a small wave." src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/520525/original/file-20230412-16-o440sw.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&rect=0%2C0%2C1597%2C1058&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/520525/original/file-20230412-16-o440sw.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/520525/original/file-20230412-16-o440sw.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/520525/original/file-20230412-16-o440sw.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/520525/original/file-20230412-16-o440sw.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=502&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/520525/original/file-20230412-16-o440sw.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=502&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/520525/original/file-20230412-16-o440sw.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=502&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px">
<figcaption>
<span class="caption">A team of experts deliver rehabilitation sessions on the south Wales coast.</span>
<span class="attribution"><span class="source">Swansea University</span>, <span class="license">Author provided</span></span>
</figcaption>
</figure>
<p>We followed up by interviewing 15 patients who have undertaken surfing sessions as part of the neuro-rehabilitation programme run by the Swansea Bay and Hywel Dda university health boards to learn more about their experiences.</p>
<p>We found that providing brain injury survivors with an opportunity to immerse themselves in the dynamic elements of the tide, wind and sea can have a huge impact on their mental health and wellbeing. It enabled participants to reconnect with the outside world and feel respite from the everyday stressors of modern life. </p>
<p>Connecting people to nature <a href="https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0272494419301185?via%3Dihub">has previously been shown</a> to improve wellbeing and promote an appreciation of the environment. But our patients reported some particular benefits to surfing. </p>
<p>In contrast to gardening, for example, one of the participants who shared their experiences described surf therapy as something which “doesn’t stay still”. It’s something which is constantly evolving – falling off the board is a part of the learning process. This can be uncomfortable and distressing at first, but persevering can often lead to feeling a sense of achievement.</p>
<p>Some of our participants reported that surfing had taught them that all types of emotions – whether positive or negative – are an important part of the human experience. Instead of trying to control them, accepting them can help people find meaning in their lives. </p>
<hr>
<p>
<em>
<strong>
Read more:
<a href="https://theconversation.com/why-learning-to-surf-can-be-great-for-your-mental-health-according-to-a-psychologist-196946">Why learning to surf can be great for your mental health, according to a psychologist</a>
</strong>
</em>
</p>
<hr>
<p>Making room for difficult thoughts enabled some of our brain injury survivors to reconnect with their values and hobbies too. Surfing gave them meaning and a “valid reason for being alive”. It also showed them that “despite being a bit broken in some places,” they were still capable people. This helped them to renegotiate their identity.</p>
<p>Connecting with people in similar situations can also be crucial after brain injury. Many report that they don’t feel understood by family and friends. Yet <a href="https://www.semanticscholar.org/paper/Sense-of-belonging-and-indicators-of-social-and-Hagerty-Williams/ac5ed15e943e8ef0d09905a07e047b96ccf66611">belonging</a> is a basic psychological need. </p>
<p>Being part of a group enabled our brain injury survivors to learn there were other people with similar experiences. They were able to create a network where they could share resources and experiences to help each other.</p>
<figure>
<iframe width="440" height="260" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/il9wB7siD-Y?wmode=transparent&start=0" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen=""></iframe>
<figcaption><span class="caption">The seated tandem surfboard allows people who cannot sit unaided to participate in surfing.</span></figcaption>
</figure>
<p>The purpose of therapy is to induce sustained and meaningful change after brain injury. Along with immediate improvements in fitness, balance and coordination, <a href="https://www.mdpi.com/2071-1050/14/15/9605">our follow-up research</a> found patients continued engaging in outdoor physical activity for up to ten months later. </p>
<p>Some stuck with surfing, while others took up paddleboarding or cold-water swimming. Research suggetss taking part in <a href="https://doi.org/10.1093/heapro/day103">purposefully designed water-based activities</a> can generate a similar sense of wellbeing as surfing. </p>
<p>Our research underlines how the power of the sea can offer patients benefits which typical clinical settings do not provide.</p><img src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/203094/count.gif" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" />
<p class="fine-print"><em><span>Andrew H Kemp receives funding from Health and Care Research Wales. </span></em></p><p class="fine-print"><em><span>Zoe Fisher receives funding from Health Care Research Wales </span></em></p><p class="fine-print"><em><span>Katie Gibbs does not work for, consult, own shares in or receive funding from any company or organisation that would benefit from this article, and has disclosed no relevant affiliations beyond their academic appointment.</span></em></p>Brain injury survivors report the sport can give constant opportunities for learning and a way to reevaulate emotions.Katie Gibbs, Research and Innovation Assistant and PhD Student of Psychology at Swansea University, Swansea UniversityAndrew H Kemp, Professor and Personal Chair, Swansea UniversityZoe Fisher, Consultant Clinical Psychologist, Swansea UniversityLicensed as Creative Commons – attribution, no derivatives.tag:theconversation.com,2011:article/2055452023-05-17T15:31:57Z2023-05-17T15:31:57ZSome countries express fewer negative emotions than others: this is how people feel around the world<figure><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/525895/original/file-20230512-8252-mhbdne.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&rect=0%2C0%2C4249%2C2828&q=45&auto=format&w=496&fit=clip" /><figcaption><span class="caption">
</span> <span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://www.shutterstock.com/es/image-photo/young-traveler-girl-looking-sea-helsinki-483278590">Kert/Shutterstock</a></span></figcaption></figure><p><a href="https://globalizationandhealth.biomedcentral.com/articles/10.1186/s12992-017-0290-0">Emotions</a> are affective reactions we experience to stimuli. They can be positive, such as feeling relaxed or enjoying what you are doing (shopping or going for a walk, for example); and negative, such as being angry, sad or worried. </p>
<p>But are we happy, irritated or depressed in the same way in different countries and cultures? It seems that the answer is a resounding no: different levels of positive and negative emotions differ according to where we come from. </p>
<p>In a study involving more than 50,000 adults in Spain, Mexico, India, China, Russia, Ghana, South Africa, Finland and Poland, the <a href="https://journals.plos.org/plosone/article?id=10.1371/journal.pone.0061534">day reconstruction method</a> assessed the extent to which people felt worried, irritated or angry, rushed, depressed, tense or stressed; or calm, relaxed and enjoying themselves. </p>
<p>The results revealed that people in Finland, China, Ghana and South Africa express fewer negative emotions. As for positive emotions, they are more homogeneous across countries, with the participants from African nations having higher values. </p>
<figure class="align-center zoomable">
<a href="https://images.theconversation.com/files/523646/original/file-20230501-14-k8mn3q.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&rect=0%2C0%2C1920%2C1080&q=45&auto=format&w=1000&fit=clip"><img alt="" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/523646/original/file-20230501-14-k8mn3q.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&rect=0%2C0%2C1920%2C1080&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/523646/original/file-20230501-14-k8mn3q.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=338&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/523646/original/file-20230501-14-k8mn3q.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=338&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/523646/original/file-20230501-14-k8mn3q.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=338&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/523646/original/file-20230501-14-k8mn3q.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=424&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/523646/original/file-20230501-14-k8mn3q.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=424&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/523646/original/file-20230501-14-k8mn3q.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=424&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px"></a>
<figcaption>
<span class="caption">Culture, in relation to socio-economic context, can influence the way people perceive and express emotions.</span>
<span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://pixabay.com/photos/holi-girl-indian-india-dance-fun-2416686/">Murtaza_ali / Pixabay</a></span>
</figcaption>
</figure>
<h2>In China, emotions are considered pathogenic factors</h2>
<p>Culture can influence the way people showcase their emotions. For example, Chinese emotions and their expression differ from other cultures in their low frequency, intensity and duration. In fact, <a href="https://www.jstor.org/stable/10.1525/j.ctv1wxs1d">there is a long history</a> of considering emotions as pathogenic, understood as factors that disturb the normal functioning of the body. This tradition consequently discourages their expression.</p>
<p>Finns tend to be emotionally reserved and rarely score high on the expression of joy or anger. In fact, the Finnish concept <a href="https://www.bbc.com/travel/article/20180617-why-the-finns-dont-want-to-be-happy"><em>sisu</em></a> means to demonstrate strength, stoicism and resilience. <a href="https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s10531-004-8787-2">Social norms in some African countries analyzed in another study (Ghana, Nigeria, South Africa, Tanzania, and Zimbabwe)</a> point to negative emotions as undesirable.</p>
<p>Taking social factors into account is important, as promoting and improving people’s emotional wellbeing should be a key aspect of public social agendas.</p>
<p>And are these factors associated with emotions in the same way in different countries? Despite differences in the extent to which emotions are reported and the cultural, social and economic gap, we agree on many social aspects. Among them, <a href="https://systematicreviewsjournal.biomedcentral.com/articles/10.1186/s13643-018-0935-">unwanted loneliness</a> stands out, i.e. the discrepancy between the relationships a person has and the ones he or she would like to have. This is one of the greatest enemies of emotional wellbeing wherever we live.</p>
<h2>Loneliness increases feelings of depression</h2>
<p>The emotion most affected by loneliness is depression, especially in European countries. Higher levels of loneliness correspond to higher levels of depression and lower levels of positive emotions. We are talking about feelings and emotions of depression: feeling depressed is not the same as suffering from depression.</p>
<p>Surprisingly, in only one country, Mexico, loneliness was not associated with any emotion. <a href="https://journalofchinesesociology.springeropen.com/articles/10.1186/s40711-019-0106-0">Previous evidence</a> affirms that the negative consequences of loneliness in the Mexican population are mitigated by social interactions and family support. Indeed, less than 1% of participants lived alone, a possible indicator of the relevance of family ties. This indicates that the effects of loneliness vary culturally. </p>
<p>Social participation is associated with higher positive emotions and trust in society with lower negative emotions. <a href="https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s11205-013-0361-4">Trust</a> creates a sense of security, bringing calmness in daily life and stimulating cooperation, increasing the perception of social support. Living alone leads to greater feelings of depression, without being associated with other emotions. </p>
<p>Perhaps it is the subjective experience of loneliness that has the greatest influence on people’s day-to-day emotions, rather than an objective measure such as living alone, which may or may not be desired.</p>
<p>Human beings are naturally inclined to social relationships and social exchange. Social aspects are relevant to emotions in all countries, but the form and strength of their relationships depend on the country and culture.</p>
<p>Taking into account the different cultural settings, policies to promote emotional wellbeing should be implemented. For example, social participation could be intensified, involving people in their community through volunteering and facilitating access to leisure activities. Another interesting strategy would be to ensure social relations in all countries to avoid loneliness and isolation, as well as to increase the security of neighbourhoods to foster social trust. </p>
<p>At the same time, it would be necessary to create an international dialogue on loneliness in order to raise awareness of the problem, identify it and reduce its impact on people’s emotional wellbeing.</p><img src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/205545/count.gif" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" />
<p class="fine-print"><em><span>Marta Miret receives funding from the Spanish Instituto de Salud Carlos III (PI19/00235 and PI22/00309).</span></em></p><p class="fine-print"><em><span>Chiara Castelletti no recibe salario, ni ejerce labores de consultoría, ni posee acciones, ni recibe financiación de ninguna compañía u organización que pueda obtener beneficio de este artículo, y ha declarado carecer de vínculos relevantes más allá del cargo académico citado.</span></em></p>Study shows people in China and Finland express fewer negative emotions than other nations.Chiara Castelletti, Doctoranda en Psicología clínica y de la salud, con contrato FPI-UAM en el departamento de Psiquiatría (Facultad de Medicina), Universidad Autónoma de MadridMarta Miret, Profesora de Psicología Médica, Universidad Autónoma de MadridLicensed as Creative Commons – attribution, no derivatives.tag:theconversation.com,2011:article/2047202023-05-09T12:23:17Z2023-05-09T12:23:17ZThe unbearable allure of cringe<figure><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/524928/original/file-20230508-170642-f3uhnn.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&rect=429%2C23%2C4125%2C2914&q=45&auto=format&w=496&fit=clip" /><figcaption><span class="caption">When someone humiliates themselves on TV, you want to look away, but you can't.</span> <span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://www.gettyimages.com/detail/photo/hard-to-look-royalty-free-image/80467171?phrase=cringing+watching+TV&adppopup=true">Designpics/Getty Images</a></span></figcaption></figure><p>Why can’t you stop watching TV shows, movies or viral videos that make you cringe?</p>
<p>Cringe is the feeling you get when your boss cracks a joke in a meeting and no one laughs. It’s when your kid shoots a soccer ball and it misses the net by … a lot. It’s when you watch Kendall Roy from “Succession” <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8Z4jteTnPqI">awkwardly rap on stage</a> at a celebration honoring his dad’s 50 years at the helm of the family company.</p>
<p>This secondhand embarrassment you feel for other people, real or fictional, is physical and emotional. It’s the gut punch of a gasped “oh no!” paired with a side of “I’m glad that wasn’t me” relief.</p>
<p>Research usually sees cringe in a <a href="https://doi.org/10.1177/1527476418777838">negative light</a> – as a voyeuristic emotion that allows people to gawk at the misfortune of others.</p>
<p>However, in <a href="https://doi.org/10.1177/14705931231154944">a recent study</a>, we show that cringe-filled entertainment can actually help people better understand themselves and one another. This may be a big reason why people are so drawn to cringeworthy content in the first place.</p>
<h2>Studying cringe</h2>
<p>Cringe is everywhere, but it’s especially ubiquitous in movies and on TV, where it elicits winces, laughs and embarrassment in viewers.</p>
<p>Scripted cringe comedy shows such as “The Office” and “Curb Your Enthusiasm” have been widely successful. These shows often feature characters encountering uncomfortable social situations and handling them with little or no grace – like when Toby, in “The Office,” awkwardly touches the knee of his crush, Pam.</p>
<figure>
<iframe width="440" height="260" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/s_EHezMKD7Q?wmode=transparent&start=0" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen=""></iframe>
<figcaption><span class="caption">Much of the humor in ‘The Office’ is tied to cringe-inducing situations.</span></figcaption>
</figure>
<p>Cringe is also a notable hallmark of reality TV, where cast members or contestants expose themselves to <a href="https://www.refinery29.com/en-au/2023/01/11251738/the-bachelors-cringe">public heartbreak</a>, <a href="https://www.yahoo.com/news/could-fastest-fail-ninja-warrior-045517308.html">fail spectacularly at physical challenges</a> or <a href="https://www.foxnews.com/entertainment/katy-perry-traumatized-american-idol-contestant-harsh-critique-nightmares">endure humiliating critiques from judges</a>.</p>
<p>In our study, we examined the first season of Netflix’s “<a href="https://www.imdb.com/title/tt12580168/">Indian Matchmaking</a>,” a show that follows matchmaker Sima Taparia as she guides her clients in India and the U.S. through the arranged marriage process.</p>
<p>Now in its third season, the show has received an <a href="https://www.independent.co.uk/arts-entertainment/tv/news/indian-matchmaking-netflix-emmy-arranged-marriage-b1884482.html">Emmy nomination</a> and inspired a spinoff called “<a href="https://www.insider.com/jewish-matchmaking-netflix-aleeza-ben-shalom-orthodox-intentional-dating-2023-5">Jewish Matchmaking</a>.”</p>
<p>In our research, we used our own experiences as data through a process called <a href="https://doi.org/10.1080/08989575.2017.1288892">collaborative autoethnography</a>. Specifically, we wrote and analyzed our reactions to each episode in the first season of “Indian Matchmaking.” </p>
<p>Our diary entries were full of moments of secondhand embarrassment – whether it was witnessing a first date filled with uncomfortable silences, or watching a participant show us his closet with doorknobs that have his face on them. </p>
<p>By analyzing these entries, we generated in-depth insights into what it means to cringe.</p>
<h2>Everyone bumbles through life</h2>
<p>What was surprising was that the cringeworthy scenes weren’t always accompanied by a sense of voyeurism or feelings of <a href="https://theconversation.com/why-does-it-feel-good-to-see-someone-fail-107349">schadenfreude</a>. </p>
<p>Instead, we found that binge-watching a show with a lot of cringeworthy moments can be, dare we say, therapeutic.</p>
<p>Cringe made us recognize the parts of ourselves that we saw as undesirable.</p>
<p>Watching “Indian Matchmaking,” we were reminded that, like the people on the show, we haven’t always performed well in the dating market. One participant who brought this form of cringe to life for us was Aparna. A successful lawyer living in Houston, she could come off <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=31pGZerv6UE&t=70s&pp=ygUZaW5kaWFuIG1hdGNobWFraW5nIGFwYXJuYQ%3D%3D">as abrupt or rude</a> – “Oh, do we have to see our husbands all the time?”</p>
<p>Throughout the show, Taparia tries to make Aparna “compromise” – in other words, settle for men she doesn’t see as worthy of her. Taparia, as well as fans of the show, have called Aparna an <a href="https://www.theringer.com/tv/2020/7/27/21340225/aparna-indian-matchmaking-villain-antihero.">unrealistic perfectionist</a>.</p>
<p>Aparna’s interactions with Taparia are fraught, and various tensions play out – modern values versus traditional ones, and what makes a woman desirable versus undesirable. There’s a sheen of sexism to this dynamic: Aparna is chastised for behavior that men on the show are excused for.</p>
<p>Having navigated similarly perfectionist tendencies in our dating lives, we saw ourselves represented in Aparna’s journey. We even would often refer to each other as “Aparna” while emailing about this study. </p>
<p>Our affinity for Aparna reminded us of watching Michael Scott from “The Office.” </p>
<p>We’ve seen him make a grand gesture to declare his love for someone too early in a relationship – and not get an “I love you” back – or argue with his partner in front of friends at a <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ap0ae1Z8qGg&ab_channel=TheOffice">dinner party</a> and thought, “I’ve been there” or “I’ve seen that.”</p>
<p>While <a href="https://www.routledge.com/Reacting-to-Reality-Television-Performance-Audience-and-Value/Skeggs-Wood/p/book/9780415693714">previous research</a> shows that audiences distance themselves from television personalities like Aparna or Michael Scott, we couldn’t help but embrace cringeworthy representations of the less-than-desirable aspects of our personalities.</p>
<p>It was, in a strange way, freeing to see other people bumble through life, and made us think about being less hard on ourselves.</p>
<h2>A way to confront our biases</h2>
<p>When we watched “Indian Matchmaking” and cringed, we sometimes wondered why, exactly, we were cringing in the first place.</p>
<p>In “Indian Matchmaking,” first dates often include discussions about personal finances and the number of kids each person wants to have. </p>
<figure class="align-center ">
<img alt="Smiling woman sitting at a restaurant with a date." src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/524958/original/file-20230508-30782-8d4pq4.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/524958/original/file-20230508-30782-8d4pq4.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=342&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/524958/original/file-20230508-30782-8d4pq4.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=342&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/524958/original/file-20230508-30782-8d4pq4.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=342&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/524958/original/file-20230508-30782-8d4pq4.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=430&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/524958/original/file-20230508-30782-8d4pq4.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=430&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/524958/original/file-20230508-30782-8d4pq4.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=430&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px">
<figcaption>
<span class="caption">On ‘Indian Matchmaking,’ first dates often include topics of conversation that Westerners would avoid.</span>
<span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://pyxis.nymag.com/v1/imgs/74c/dc6/8bbc68d5aaca62cbbd96795f323fe35b60-indian-matchmaking.jpg">Netflix</a></span>
</figcaption>
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<p>If you grew up in a Western country, you might feel your stomach clench while watching these conversations. </p>
<p>But in other parts of the world, this is actually perfectly normal and expected. In India, <a href="https://eprints.ncl.ac.uk/file_store/production/215652/83FC1820-3CC7-49AD-B712-CD866A5713EC.pdf">marriage is often about more than just romantic love</a>; it is a union between two families, and this entails hashing out logistics early on. There is no playing it cool. </p>
<p>So in this way, cringe can alert viewers to their values and judgments and lead to reflections about cultural differences.</p>
<h2>Cringing at exploitation and mockery</h2>
<p>Then there’s the sort of cringe that arose when, midseason, we started to question why a show like “Indian Matchmaking” was made in the first place. </p>
<p>It’s like when you see videos of white people volunteering in low-income countries with their <a href="https://www.theatlantic.com/international/archive/2012/03/the-white-savior-industrial-complex/254843/">white savior complex</a> on <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=haFdtgUr52s&ab_channel=TEDxTalks">full display</a>.</p>
<p>Our reaction diary entries are riddled with questions about the way the showrunners edited – or even manipulated – the characters’ stories. </p>
<p>Some diary entries talk about cringing when a scene appears clearly staged, or when the showrunners appear to be mocking the characters, like when the show plays silly music when showing first dates.</p>
<figure>
<iframe width="440" height="260" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/9RrLQUN8UJg?wmode=transparent&start=0" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen=""></iframe>
<figcaption><span class="caption">‘American Idol’ has showcased its fair share of cringe over the years – but William Hung’s performance in 2004 might win the honor of most cringeworthy.</span></figcaption>
</figure>
<p>What sort of responsibility do the showrunners have toward the audience, Indian and otherwise? While the show highlights social issues such as sexism, does it ever really challenge or confront them? </p>
<p>The show has also been criticized for <a href="https://www.theatlantic.com/culture/archive/2020/08/netflix-indian-matchmaking-and-the-shadow-of-caste/614863/">propagating casteism</a> and portraying India as a <a href="https://www.vogue.in/content/indian-matchmakings-third-world-montages-highlight-whats-wrong-with-representation-today">backward country</a>.</p>
<p>We cringed when we realized we were complicit in these undercurrents of discrimination because we watched, laughed and professionally benefited from this show.</p>
<p>However, we ultimately felt that our allegiance is not with the showrunners, or with those in the arranged marriage process <a href="https://feminisminindia.com/2021/03/29/patriarch-arranged-marriage-india/">who perpetuate the patriarchy</a>. It was with the people in the show who remind us of ourselves.</p>
<p>Cringe is more than a fleeting feeling or fodder for yet another reality TV franchise, and maybe it’s a good thing that so many people are drawn to this sort of content. In our case, pushing past secondhand embarrassment and reflecting a bit helped us better understand ourselves and each other.</p><img src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/204720/count.gif" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" />
<p class="fine-print"><em><span>The authors do not work for, consult, own shares in or receive funding from any company or organization that would benefit from this article, and have disclosed no relevant affiliations beyond their academic appointment.</span></em></p>What does secondhand embarrassment say about your own anxieties and biases?Carly Drake, Assistant Professor of Marketing, North Central CollegeAnuja Anil Pradhan, Assistant Professor of Consumption, Culture and Commerce, University of Southern DenmarkLicensed as Creative Commons – attribution, no derivatives.tag:theconversation.com,2011:article/2042642023-05-03T03:36:40Z2023-05-03T03:36:40ZAlone Australia contestants are grappling with isolation and setbacks. Here’s what makes a winner<figure><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/523957/original/file-20230503-26-dytqdu.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&rect=0%2C0%2C3600%2C2401&q=45&auto=format&w=496&fit=clip" /><figcaption><span class="caption">Will it be Gina?</span> <span class="attribution"><span class="source">SBS TV</span></span></figcaption></figure><p>The winner of the reality TV show <a href="https://www.sbs.com.au/ondemand/tv-series/alone-australia">Alone Australia</a>
will need more than “survival skills” to succeed. They will also need to draw on a host of psychological strengths.</p>
<p>Will the winner be the one who shows the most mental toughness or “grit”? Will it be the one who copes with being socially isolated in the Tasmanian wilderness for weeks? How about the contestant who takes a moment to feel awe watching a sunset?</p>
<p>I’m a social psychology researcher, specialising in the dynamics between social interactions and emotions. Here’s what happens when you take away those social interactions, and some thoughts on who’s most likely to thrive.</p>
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<p>
<em>
<strong>
Read more:
<a href="https://theconversation.com/what-alone-australia-tells-us-about-fear-and-why-we-need-it-203399">What Alone Australia tells us about fear, and why we need it</a>
</strong>
</em>
</p>
<hr>
<h2>Remind me, what’s Alone Australia?</h2>
<p>Alone Australia on SBS TV involves ten contestants who are dropped into the wilds of a Tasmanian winter. Each has ten chosen items (from an approved list) and kilos of recording equipment. </p>
<p>Aside from medical check-ins, they have no social contact. Over the coming days and weeks, they film themselves building a shelter, making fire, and finding food and water. Some thrive, some clearly struggle.</p>
<p>Contestants can choose to “tap out” or can be removed for medical reasons. The contestant who lasts the longest wins A$250,000.</p>
<p>Contestants were selected on the basis of having survival skills and a personality likely to be engaging on camera. </p>
<p>But success on the show will likely also stem from a range of psychological capacities – and perhaps a bit of good luck.</p>
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<p>
<em>
<strong>
Read more:
<a href="https://theconversation.com/woman-spends-500-days-alone-in-a-cave-how-extreme-isolation-can-alter-your-sense-of-time-204166">Woman spends 500 days alone in a cave – how extreme isolation can alter your sense of time</a>
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</em>
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<h2>Mental toughness is key</h2>
<p>Contestants face a gruelling environment. They are repeatedly challenged by the terrain and weather, as well as by hunger and setbacks.</p>
<p>Here, “<a href="https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/1612197X.2007.9671836">mental toughness</a>”, which is related to the popular idea of “<a href="https://www.frontiersin.org/articles/10.3389/fpsyg.2020.545526/full">grit</a>”, plays a role. </p>
<p>Mental toughness is a group of personality characteristics originally identified in elite and successful athletes. It relates to coping with the pressures of competition, as well as setting and following through on training and performance goals. </p>
<p>Athletes higher in mental toughness tend to <a href="https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S144024401400632X">perform better</a>. Mentally tough military recruits are more likely to be <a href="https://www.researchgate.net/profile/Robin-Lines-2/publication/339962608_Mental_toughness_as_a_psychological_determinant_of_behavioral_perseverance_in_special_forces_selection/links/5e858551a6fdcca789e8e6bf/Mental-toughness-as-a-psychological-determinant-of-behavioral-perseverance-in-special-forces-selection.pdf">selected</a> to join special forces.</p>
<figure class="align-center zoomable">
<a href="https://images.theconversation.com/files/523967/original/file-20230503-26-6m3cre.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=1000&fit=clip"><img alt="Mike, contestant on Alone Australia, in Tasmanian wilderness" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/523967/original/file-20230503-26-6m3cre.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/523967/original/file-20230503-26-6m3cre.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=395&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/523967/original/file-20230503-26-6m3cre.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=395&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/523967/original/file-20230503-26-6m3cre.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=395&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/523967/original/file-20230503-26-6m3cre.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=497&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/523967/original/file-20230503-26-6m3cre.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=497&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/523967/original/file-20230503-26-6m3cre.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=497&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px"></a>
<figcaption>
<span class="caption">Will it be Mike?</span>
<span class="attribution"><span class="source">SBS TV</span></span>
</figcaption>
</figure>
<p>Can mental toughness be cultivated in the moment? It appears so. <a href="https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/full/10.1080/20445911.2014.995104">Thinking back</a> to past failures tends to spur people to stick to current tough goals. Future thinking also plays a role. <a href="https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/full/10.1080/10413200.2011.605422">Imagining a future</a> in which you are confident and in control builds self-reported toughness.</p>
<p>We know mentally tough people use a few “<a href="https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/full/10.1080/17461390903049972">performance strategies</a>”. These include talking positively to themselves (either out loud or in their mind), controlling their emotions, and intentionally staying relaxed. People can practise and draw on these strategies in the face of adversity. Mentally tough people also avoid negative thinking such as leaning into thoughts of failure or engaging in self-blame.</p>
<p>But mental toughness has limits. When <a href="https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S1440244017317498">fatigued</a>, mental toughness no longer predicts perseverance towards a difficult physical goal. Instead, underlying fitness levels appear to be critical.</p>
<hr>
<p>
<em>
<strong>
Read more:
<a href="https://theconversation.com/grit-or-quit-how-to-help-your-child-develop-resilience-195195">Grit or quit? How to help your child develop resilience</a>
</strong>
</em>
</p>
<hr>
<h2>Combating loneliness is crucial</h2>
<p>The main premise of the show – and its namesake – is total social isolation.</p>
<p>Research highlights the <a href="https://www.aihw.gov.au/reports/australias-welfare/social-isolation-and-loneliness-covid-pandemic">difference</a> between <em>social isolation</em> (lack of opportunity for social interaction) and <em>loneliness</em> (the distressing feeling that one’s social needs aren’t being met). A person can be socially isolated but not feel lonely or feel lonely even in the presence of others.</p>
<p>Not everyone has the same needs for social interaction. Indeed, some people place high value on solitude and generally need less interaction to <a href="https://www.frontiersin.org/articles/10.3389/fnbeh.2023.1068609/full">avoid loneliness</a>. </p>
<p>But there’s a caveat. “<a href="https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/full/10.1111/j.1467-6494.2010.00702.x">Social anhedonia</a>” (markedly low interest in and reward from interpersonal connection) is associated with poor functioning.</p>
<p>Even people who don’t prefer solitude can get creative about fulfilling social needs when people aren’t around.</p>
<p>Humans tend to <a href="https://guilfordjournals.com/doi/10.1521/soco.2008.26.2.143">anthropomorphise</a> (or perceive as human) non-human objects and animals when feeling lonely. </p>
<p>You might remember <a href="https://www.wilson.com/en-us/blog/volleyball/behind-scenes/true-story-wilson-volleyball">Wilson the volleyball</a> from the movie Cast Away. Wilson kept the lead character company during his years being stranded on an island.</p>
<p>People can also remember past, or anticipate future, social interactions. This “<a href="https://www.frontiersin.org/articles/10.3389/fpsyg.2016.00013/full">social daydreaming</a>” may help people cope when their friends and family are not around.</p>
<hr>
<p>
<em>
<strong>
Read more:
<a href="https://theconversation.com/the-politics-of-the-castaway-story-200827">The politics of the castaway story</a>
</strong>
</em>
</p>
<hr>
<h2>How about awe and pride?</h2>
<p>Emotional experiences also likely have a role in pushing some contestants to endure longer. Others have written about the <a href="https://theconversation.com/what-alone-australia-tells-us-about-fear-and-why-we-need-it-203399">role of fear</a> on the show (in a nutshell, fear has its place and isn’t to be avoided). </p>
<p>But research also points to the potential benefits of positive emotions in this situation, such as awe and pride.</p>
<figure class="align-left zoomable">
<a href="https://images.theconversation.com/files/523969/original/file-20230503-28-i6veb9.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=1000&fit=clip"><img alt="Kate, contestant in Alone Australia, in Tasmanian wilderness" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/523969/original/file-20230503-28-i6veb9.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=237&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/523969/original/file-20230503-28-i6veb9.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=636&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/523969/original/file-20230503-28-i6veb9.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=636&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/523969/original/file-20230503-28-i6veb9.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=636&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/523969/original/file-20230503-28-i6veb9.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=799&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/523969/original/file-20230503-28-i6veb9.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=799&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/523969/original/file-20230503-28-i6veb9.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=799&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px"></a>
<figcaption>
<span class="caption">Will it be Kate?</span>
<span class="attribution"><span class="source">SBS TV</span></span>
</figcaption>
</figure>
<p>Natural environments are in no short supply for contestants on the show. In fact, nature is nearly all they see. And nature is a prime trigger of
<a href="https://www.templeton.org/discoveries/the-science-of-awe">awe</a> – the positive emotional experience when witnessing extraordinary things that are vast and complex.</p>
<p>Awe is linked to a variety of <a href="https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/eight_reasons_why_awe_makes_your_life_better">beneficial outcomes</a>, including higher self-reported wellbeing, physical health, critical thinking and humility.</p>
<p>Most of us are familiar with pride – the emotional experience associated with achievement. Pride isn’t just felt upon attaining a goal, but also when making <a href="https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S1469029217307446">progress</a> along the way. </p>
<p>Despite pride’s bad rap (for instance, as a deadly sin), my own research links the experience of pride to <a href="https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/18505314/">pursuing goals</a>. People work harder at a goal when they’re feeling proud of earlier accomplishments. </p>
<p>One key to unlocking the benefits of positive emotions such as pride and awe is to mindfully find the opportunities to experience them. Specifically, <a href="https://internationaljournalofwellbeing.org/index.php/ijow/article/view/18">savouring the moment</a> is a documented strategy for intentionally increasing the experience of positive emotions such as awe and pride.</p>
<hr>
<p>
<em>
<strong>
Read more:
<a href="https://theconversation.com/personalities-that-thrive-in-isolation-and-what-we-can-all-learn-from-time-alone-135307">Personalities that thrive in isolation and what we can all learn from time alone</a>
</strong>
</em>
</p>
<hr>
<h2>Are you a future Alone Australia winner?</h2>
<p>If you’re thinking of applying for future seasons of Alone Australia, you might be wondering if you have what it takes.</p>
<p>Given time, you can build both your survival and psychological skills.</p>
<p>You can develop mental toughness, your capacity to combat loneliness while socially isolated, and your ability to savour positive emotions such as awe and pride.</p>
<hr>
<p>
<em>
<strong>
Read more:
<a href="https://theconversation.com/what-is-hedonism-and-how-does-it-affect-your-health-78040">What is hedonism and how does it affect your health?</a>
</strong>
</em>
</p>
<hr>
<img src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/204264/count.gif" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" />
<p class="fine-print"><em><span>Lisa A. Williams receives funding from the Australian government (Australian Research Council; Department of Industry, Science, and Resources).</span></em></p>Is winning about mental toughness? How about coping with social isolation? Or will it be the one who’s in awe of a sunset?Lisa A Williams, Associate Professor, School of Psychology, UNSW SydneyLicensed as Creative Commons – attribution, no derivatives.tag:theconversation.com,2011:article/2007292023-04-06T18:39:19Z2023-04-06T18:39:19ZHow parents feel about feelings can deeply affect a child’s development<figure><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/518528/original/file-20230330-24-19qiuv.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&rect=0%2C49%2C5381%2C2899&q=45&auto=format&w=496&fit=clip" /><figcaption><span class="caption">All of us have long emotional histories that emerged from the emotional climate we grew up with.</span> <span class="attribution"><span class="source">(Shutterstock)</span></span></figcaption></figure><p>How our families express feelings, talk about feelings and react to feelings can have ripple effects into the next generation.</p>
<p>When someone becomes a parent, the models they had can become embedded in how they in turn parent.</p>
<p>A parent’s organized set of thoughts and feelings about their own and their child’s feelings is what some psychologists call “<a href="https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1750-8606.2012.00244.x">parental meta-emotion philosophy</a>.” Understanding this can make a big difference in parenting and children’s development. </p>
<p>I lead research projects that investigate the usefulness of programs that teach parents how to understand their “feelings about feelings” and guide their children in healthy emotional regulation and coping strategies. </p>
<h2>The family emotional climate</h2>
<p>All of us have a long emotional history that comes from the <a href="https://doi.org/10.1111/cdep.12238">emotional climate</a> we grew up with. Early experiences become ingrained in how we feel about feelings, and affect our ability to form healthy relationships. </p>
<hr>
<p>
<em>
<strong>
Read more:
<a href="https://theconversation.com/how-parents-can-be-emotion-coaches-as-kids-navigate-back-to-school-during-covid-19-166148">How parents can be 'emotion coaches' as kids navigate back-to-school during COVID-19</a>
</strong>
</em>
</p>
<hr>
<p>Based on their emotional history, some parents become good at what psychologists call emotion coaching. </p>
<p>These parents have learned to recognize and accept their feelings, for example that “it is okay to be sad.” They are aware of their children’s lower-intensity feelings and view their children’s emotional displays as a time for connection and teaching. </p>
<figure class="align-center ">
<img alt="A mother seen sitting next to a daughter who looks unsure about her feelings." src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/518579/original/file-20230330-22-bqww00.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/518579/original/file-20230330-22-bqww00.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/518579/original/file-20230330-22-bqww00.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/518579/original/file-20230330-22-bqww00.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/518579/original/file-20230330-22-bqww00.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/518579/original/file-20230330-22-bqww00.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/518579/original/file-20230330-22-bqww00.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px">
<figcaption>
<span class="caption">Gaining the ability to be aware of, understand and manage feelings is an important part of child development.</span>
<span class="attribution"><span class="source">(Shutterstock)</span></span>
</figcaption>
</figure>
<h2>Becoming aware of feelings</h2>
<p>Other parents have learned to ignore or deny their feelings and develop a tendency to dismiss emotions. These parents tend to avoid uncomfortable feelings like sadness and anger. Emotionally dismissive parents will likely try to make uncomfortable feelings in children go away quickly or brush them off by saying things like “you’ll get over it.” </p>
<p>Gaining the ability to be aware of, understand and manage feelings is an important part of child development. Studies have shown that parents who have an “emotion coaching” philosophy support their children’s <a href="https://doi.org/10.1007/s10826-013-9752-z">emotional regulation</a>, <a href="https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1467-9507.2007.00382.x">behaviour</a> and <a href="https://doi.org/10.3724/SP.J.1041.2012.00199">social skills</a>. </p>
<p>The question is, how effective is teaching parents to understand their “feelings about feelings” at improving the family emotional climate and child development outcomes.</p>
<h2>Parenting programs</h2>
<p>Parent education programs teach parents about children’s needs and development and offer them tools to enhance their parenting behaviours. Some parenting classes and programs are delivered through organizations like family centres and social services. </p>
<p>Others are offered through medical clinics like pediatricians’ offices. There are many programs that help parents respond to children’s challenging behaviours — for example, teaching parents how to positively reinforce children’s appropriate behaviours. </p>
<figure class="align-center zoomable">
<a href="https://images.theconversation.com/files/514495/original/file-20230309-28-6pc9d5.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=1000&fit=clip"><img alt="Figure of three linked boxes demonstrates how emotional history, feelings about feelings and parental behaviour are all connected." src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/514495/original/file-20230309-28-6pc9d5.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/514495/original/file-20230309-28-6pc9d5.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=338&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/514495/original/file-20230309-28-6pc9d5.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=338&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/514495/original/file-20230309-28-6pc9d5.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=338&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/514495/original/file-20230309-28-6pc9d5.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=424&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/514495/original/file-20230309-28-6pc9d5.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=424&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/514495/original/file-20230309-28-6pc9d5.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=424&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px"></a>
<figcaption>
<span class="caption">How understanding ‘feelings about feelings’ can impact parenting and child development.</span>
<span class="attribution"><span class="source">(Gillian England-Mason)</span>, <span class="license">Author provided</span></span>
</figcaption>
</figure>
<p>More recently, some parenting programs have begun to focus on parents’ feelings about feelings: emotion-focused parenting programs. These programs teach parents specific parenting behaviours that support their children’s emotional needs. </p>
<p>One such program is called <a href="https://tuningintokids.org.au/">Tuning in to Kids</a>. It was developed in Australia and teaches parents how to become <a href="https://doi.org/10.1017/9781108682053.021">“emotion coaches”</a> who emotionally connect with their children, label and validate their children’s feelings, and help their children solve problems. </p>
<p>Another example is the <a href="https://doi.org/10.1002/da.20770">Emotional Development version of Parent-Child Interaction Therapy</a>, which strengthens relationships and teaches parents how to help their children regulate emotions. </p>
<h2>Tailored parenting programs</h2>
<p>In research with my colleagues, Krysta Andrews, Leslie Atkinson and Andrea Gonzalez, I have examined the effectiveness of emotion-focused programs in a recently published <a href="https://doi.org/10.1016/j.cpr.2023.102252">article</a> in <em>Clinical Psychology Review</em>. This article provides strong evidence that emotion-focused parenting programs can enhance parents’ ability to positively socialize their children’s emotional development and maximize positive outcomes for families. </p>
<p>However, there is a need for families, researchers, clinicians and early childhood development policymakers <a href="https://doi.org/10.1037/emo0000638">to work together to find out what programs work best, when and for whom</a>. </p>
<p>Some of <a href="https://doi.org/10.1007/s40474-020-00200-2">my work</a> suggests that these programs may especially benefit children and adolescents with complex needs, such as co-occurring mental health problems and neurodevelopmental disorders like attention deficit hyperactivity disorder. </p>
<hr>
<p>
<em>
<strong>
Read more:
<a href="https://theconversation.com/treating-specific-symptoms-of-autism-or-adhd-can-help-children-even-without-a-diagnosis-163864">Treating specific symptoms of autism or ADHD can help children, even without a diagnosis</a>
</strong>
</em>
</p>
<hr>
<h2>Children under two, culturally appropriate programs</h2>
<p>Some of my research indicates that <a href="https://doi.org/10.1037/emo0000638">emotion-focused parenting programs should be adapted or developed for specific populations</a>. For example, for parents of children under age two, as this age is a period of vulnerability for long-lasting emotional and behavioural problems.</p>
<p>And, the way families “feel about feelings” is also <a href="https://www.who.int/health-topics/social-determinants-of-health#tab=tab_1">influenced by social determinants of health</a>, which include socioeconomic factors like culture, racialization, education, housing and income. This suggests that programs for parents of children of different ages should also be culturally appropriate. Emotion-focused programs should be adapted to serve a diversity of caregivers, family structures and backgrounds.</p>
<figure class="align-center ">
<img alt="A father seen with an infant." src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/518035/original/file-20230328-3035-9i6h5r.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/518035/original/file-20230328-3035-9i6h5r.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=456&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/518035/original/file-20230328-3035-9i6h5r.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=456&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/518035/original/file-20230328-3035-9i6h5r.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=456&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/518035/original/file-20230328-3035-9i6h5r.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=573&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/518035/original/file-20230328-3035-9i6h5r.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=573&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/518035/original/file-20230328-3035-9i6h5r.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=573&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px">
<figcaption>
<span class="caption">Emotion-focused parenting programs should be tailored to meet the needs of parents of children under the age of two.</span>
<span class="attribution"><span class="source">(Pexels/Laura Garcia)</span></span>
</figcaption>
</figure>
<h2>Effects on biology</h2>
<p>Parenting is a biological process — <a href="http://dx.doi.org/10.1016/j.neuroscience.2015.09.029">hormones, brain regions and chemical messengers in the brain all support parenting behaviours</a>. Programs that focus on parental meta-emotion philosophy have the groundbreaking ability to change parenting on a behavioural level, <a href="https://doi.org/10.1016/j.tine.2019.100118">but also on a biological level</a>. </p>
<p>Psychology researchers have reason to think that helping parents understand their “feelings about feelings” can change children’s biology. One study found that program content on emotion development was <a href="https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jaac.2019.07.937">uniquely related to positive changes in emotion-related parenting and children’s brain signals</a>. </p>
<p>It is possible that these behavioural and biological changes can be passed on across generations. </p>
<p>Families with parents who understand their “feelings about feelings” will have a positive emotional change now and possibly into future generations.</p><img src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/200729/count.gif" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" />
<p class="fine-print"><em><span>Gillian England-Mason receives funding from a Canadian Institutes of Health Research (CIHR) Fellowship and a Postgraduate Fellowship in Health Innovation provided by Alberta Innovates, the Ministry of Economic Development, Trade and Tourism, and the Government of Alberta.</span></em></p>Emotion-focused parenting programs can enhance parents’ ability to positively affect their children’s emotional development.Gillian England-Mason, Postdoctoral Fellow, Department of Pediatrics, University of CalgaryLicensed as Creative Commons – attribution, no derivatives.tag:theconversation.com,2011:article/1997982023-03-02T12:39:09Z2023-03-02T12:39:09ZPositive affirmations: how talking to yourself can let the light in<figure><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/510552/original/file-20230216-457-mga8u0.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=496&fit=clip" /><figcaption><span class="caption">
</span> <span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://www.shutterstock.com/image-photo/children-running-on-meadow-sunset-249658780">ESB Professional/Shutterstock</a></span></figcaption></figure><p>Despite being a source of constant bad news, the internet is also awash with attempts at countering negativity. A quick search for “inspirational” content yields heaps of speeches, songs and sayings intended to make sense of tough times. </p>
<p>Lists of the latter will typically include things like “Imagination is more important than knowledge”, attributed to Albert Einstein, or the Nicki Minaj lyric, “Everybody dies, but not everybody lives.” Self-help <a href="https://www.louisehay.com/affirmations/">specialists</a>, talk-show <a href="https://www.the-benefits-of-positive-thinking.com/oprah-positive-quotes.html">hosts</a>, Instagram <a href="https://www.instagram.com/morganharpernichols/">influencers</a>, and even former <a href="https://www.cnbc.com/2022/11/16/michelle-obama-the-light-we-carry-quotes.html">US first ladies</a> have been known to pen positive affirmations. </p>
<p>One such list published on the <a href="https://www.oprahdaily.com/life/relationships-love/g25629970/positive-affirmations/?slide=3">Oprah Daily</a> website during the darker days of the pandemic, featured a quote by the author Maya Angelou, which reminds us that “Nothing can dim the light that shines from within”. Angelou wrote compellingly about her experiences of racism and trauma. What she wrote then can resonate with us even now, wherever we are in the world. </p>
<hr>
<figure class="align-right ">
<img alt="" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/511424/original/file-20230221-18-jj7oqg.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=237&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/511424/original/file-20230221-18-jj7oqg.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=600&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/511424/original/file-20230221-18-jj7oqg.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=600&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/511424/original/file-20230221-18-jj7oqg.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=600&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/511424/original/file-20230221-18-jj7oqg.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=754&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/511424/original/file-20230221-18-jj7oqg.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=754&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/511424/original/file-20230221-18-jj7oqg.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=754&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px">
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<p><em>This is an article from <a href="https://theconversation.com/uk/topics/the-joy-of-133450?utm_source=TCUK&utm_medium=linkback&utm_campaign=UK+YP2023+The+Joy+Of&utm_content=InArticleTop">The Joy Of*</a>, a series to help those of us in our 20s and 30s find moments of happiness in the everyday. When rents are rising, fun with friends is more infrequent and we’re struggling with work-life balance, daily life can seem hard. But joy doesn’t have to be something saved for big occasions, like weddings or birthdays. These articles from <a href="https://theconversation.com/uk/topics/quarter-life-117947?utm_source=TCUK&utm_medium=linkback&utm_campaign=UK+YP2023+The+Joy+Of&utm_content=InArticleTop">Quarter Life</a> are aimed to help you find joy in the smallest things.</em></p>
<p><em>You may be interested in:</em></p>
<p><em><a href="https://theconversation.com/ive-spent-years-studying-happiness-heres-what-actually-makes-for-a-happier-life-197580">I’ve spent years studying happiness – here’s what actually makes for a happier life</a></em></p>
<p><em><a href="https://theconversation.com/the-japanese-concept-of-ikigai-why-purpose-might-be-a-better-goal-than-happiness-88709">The Japanese concept of ikigai: why purpose might be a better goal than happiness</a></em></p>
<p><em><a href="https://theconversation.com/documenting-three-good-things-could-improve-your-mental-well-being-in-work-82808">Documenting three good things could improve your mental well-being in work</a></em></p>
<hr>
<p>Hearing or seeing this kind of brief and memorable phrase can help us to get into a more positive mindset. Whether a call to action or a reminder of the values that we hold dear, affirmations can act as a counterbalance to what psychologists refer to as <a href="https://theconversation.com/rumination-and-remedy-five-ways-to-improve-your-outlook-19527">ruminations</a> (repetitive patterns of negative thinking). They do so by getting us to focus on what matters in our lives.</p>
<h2>How to tap into positive feelings</h2>
<p>Positive emotions can be extremely powerful. Research shows that when we are <a href="https://pages.vassar.edu/tugade/files/2017/10/01_Conway-Tugade-Catalino-Fredrickson-2012-BroadenBuild_Form-FunctionMechanisms.pdf">primed</a> to feel joy, curiosity, gratitude, and other types of positive feelings, we have what psychologists term “<a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3156609/">broader thought-action repertoires</a>”. This means that we can imagine new possibilities and try out new things. We become more creative and better at solving problems. </p>
<figure class="align-center ">
<img alt="A girl in jean shorts and a white tee rollerskating outdoors." src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/510563/original/file-20230216-14-mqhv1g.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/510563/original/file-20230216-14-mqhv1g.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/510563/original/file-20230216-14-mqhv1g.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/510563/original/file-20230216-14-mqhv1g.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/510563/original/file-20230216-14-mqhv1g.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/510563/original/file-20230216-14-mqhv1g.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/510563/original/file-20230216-14-mqhv1g.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px">
<figcaption>
<span class="caption">Joy makes us more inventive.</span>
<span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://www.shutterstock.com/image-photo/young-black-woman-on-roller-skates-1027178536">Javi_indy/Shutterstock</a></span>
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</figure>
<p>In 2011, US psychologist Martin Seligman came up with what he called the <a href="https://ppc.sas.upenn.edu/sites/default/files/permawellbeing.pdf">Perma model of wellbeing</a>. It emphasises five main elements: positive emotion, engagement, relationships, meaning, and achievement. </p>
<p>This model is a helpful tool for understanding the various ways in which we can trigger more positive ways of thinking. These run the gamut from experiencing a positive emotion to being fully absorbed in a challenging task, creating a more loving connection with someone, trying to make sense of a difficult situation, or even simply ticking off jobs on a to-do list. </p>
<p>Positive affirmations have the potential to tap into these various elements of our wellbeing. They can be empowering when we are able to identify with the content of the message, when it has a moral, and when it is memorable. </p>
<p>Some can prompt us to be <a href="https://theconversation.com/hope-from-despair-how-young-people-are-taking-action-to-make-things-better-184859">hopeful</a> and focus on the here-and-now. A common saying in Alcoholics Anonymous addiction recovery circles is “One day at a time”. </p>
<p>Others urge us to become absorbed in an important task (“You’re more likely to act yourself into feeling than feel yourself into action”, from American psychologist Jerome Bruner). Others still can focus on developing positive relationships (“People who are truly strong lift others up. People who are truly powerful bring others together,” from Michelle Obama). </p>
<p>In this way, positive affirmations function like the secular version of religious or spiritual prayer. Research shows that when spoken out loud, <a href="https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s00520-012-1690-6">prayers</a> can be uplifting, comforting, and create a hopeful attitude. Likewise, speaking or singing an insightful quote or lyric to yourself can be extremely empowering. </p>
<p>Affirmations are often used to help us <a href="https://www.inc.com/amy-morin/9-mantras-that-will-keep-you-mentally-strong-in-tough-times.html">make sense</a> of disappointments and stresses and keep striving to <a href="https://rhythmsofplay.com/why-i-turn-my-goals-into-affirmations/">reach our goals</a> – like a pep talk, only, not from a coach but to ourselves. </p>
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<img alt="A smiling dog on a yellow background." src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/510548/original/file-20230216-18-99mz94.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/510548/original/file-20230216-18-99mz94.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=272&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/510548/original/file-20230216-18-99mz94.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=272&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/510548/original/file-20230216-18-99mz94.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=272&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/510548/original/file-20230216-18-99mz94.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=341&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/510548/original/file-20230216-18-99mz94.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=341&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/510548/original/file-20230216-18-99mz94.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=341&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px">
<figcaption>
<span class="caption">Positive affirmation.</span>
<span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://www.shutterstock.com/image-photo/happy-puppy-dog-smiling-on-isolated-1799966587">Smrm1977/Shutterstock</a></span>
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<p>Research has shown that people who regularly use encouraging self-talk are <a href="https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/pdf/10.1177/2329488417731861">more likely</a> to perform better, to be satisfied in their jobs, and to want to stay in their positions. This process can be vital for endurance athletes in <a href="https://marjon.repository.guildhe.ac.uk/id/eprint/17377/1/Self-talk%20and%20endurance%20performance_McCormick.pdf">maintaining stamina</a>. </p>
<p>Ultimately it is an intentional state of mind, which can be helpful in balancing out the challenges we face with these positives we’re acknowledging. Whether we are fighting for social justice, or simply struggling to make ends meet, there are often small glimpses of joy to be found in life’s simple moments. As Aretha Franklin once sang: </p>
<blockquote>
<p>You got to spread joy up to the maximum</p>
<p>Bring gloom down to the minimum</p>
<p>And have faith, or pandemonium</p>
<p>Liable to walk upon the scene</p>
</blockquote>
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<p>So look for quotes and lyrics that inspire you. Store them in a place you can regularly access – on your bedroom wall, in a notebook you keep in your bag. And dig into them when you’re experiencing tough times or when you need prompts for thinking about the bigger picture, the purpose for your life.</p>
<p>Share them with others, either through social media or in person. Take pleasure in being part of a connected and inspired community. </p>
<p>And have a go at reading them out loud. You might be surprised at how it can make you feel more energised or hopeful. It can be exciting to know speaking words of hope and encouragement can help you – and those around you – on your journey.</p><img src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/199798/count.gif" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" />
<p class="fine-print"><em><span>Glenn Williams has received funding from the Economic and Social Research Council, Derbyshire Arts Development Group, Derbyshire County Council, and Warwickshire County Council with projects studying psychological wellbeing and mental health. Views expressed here are his own and not those of these funding bodies.</span></em></p>By getting us to focus on what matters to our lives, affirmations can act as a counterbalance to spiralling negative thoughts.Glenn Williams, Principal Lecturer in Psychology, Nottingham Trent UniversityLicensed as Creative Commons – attribution, no derivatives.tag:theconversation.com,2011:article/1982762023-03-01T17:13:05Z2023-03-01T17:13:05ZJoy is good for your body and your mind – three ways to feel it more often<figure><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/507343/original/file-20230131-22-5v923v.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&rect=0%2C0%2C7139%2C4767&q=45&auto=format&w=496&fit=clip" /><figcaption><span class="caption">There are many things you can do every day to get a bit more joy in your life.</span> <span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://www.shutterstock.com/image-photo/five-friends-cheerfully-cooking-upcoming-party-598470878">Ground Picture/ Shutterstock</a></span></figcaption></figure><p>Joy is an emotion experienced by many but understood by few. It’s usually mistaken for happiness, yet is unique in its impact on both our mind and body.</p>
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<iframe id="noa-web-audio-player" style="border: none" src="https://embed-player.newsoveraudio.com/v4?key=x84olp&id=https://theconversation.com/joy-is-good-for-your-body-and-your-mind-three-ways-to-feel-it-more-often-198276 &bgColor=F5F5F5&color=D8352A&playColor=D8352A" width="100%" height="110px"></iframe>
<p><em>You can listen to more articles from The Conversation, narrated by Noa, <a href="https://theconversation.com/us/topics/audio-narrated-99682">here</a>.</em></p>
<hr>
<p>Joy is not just a mere fleeting emotion – it triggers a host of significant physiological and psychological changes that can improve our physical and mental health. And, luckily for us, there are many easy things we can do each day in order to boost the amount we feel. </p>
<p>Joy is very different from our other emotions. It relates to accomplishing something we’ve wanted for a long time – the outcome of which exceeds our expectations.</p>
<p>Joy often refers to a broad sense of being satisfied with life that appears after experiencing a sense of awe or wonder. Many of us might better associate it with <a href="https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/17439760.2017.1414298?journalCode=rpos20">feeling “blessed”</a>. While joy is experienced naturally, <a href="https://global.oup.com/academic/product/the-oxford-handbook-of-the-positive-humanities-9780190064570?cc=ie&lang=en&#">happiness is often pursued</a>.</p>
<p>Even the way we <a href="https://psycnet.apa.org/record/2014-01063-004">express joy</a> is different from our other emotions. The smile it produces is different from how we might smile when we’re happy.</p>
<p>Joy creates what’s known as a <a href="https://www.newscientist.com/definition/duchenne-smile/">Duchenne smile</a> – an involuntary, genuine smile that reaches our eyes. This type of smile is associated with a <a href="https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/17437199.2022.2052740">range of benefits</a>, such as improvements in physical health, better recovery after illness, and stronger bonds with others.</p>
<hr>
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<img alt="" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/511424/original/file-20230221-18-jj7oqg.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=237&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/511424/original/file-20230221-18-jj7oqg.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=600&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/511424/original/file-20230221-18-jj7oqg.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=600&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/511424/original/file-20230221-18-jj7oqg.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=600&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/511424/original/file-20230221-18-jj7oqg.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=754&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/511424/original/file-20230221-18-jj7oqg.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=754&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/511424/original/file-20230221-18-jj7oqg.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=754&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px">
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<p><em>This is an article from <a href="https://theconversation.com/uk/topics/the-joy-of-133450?utm_source=TCUK&utm_medium=linkback&utm_campaign=UK+YP2023+The+Joy+Of&utm_content=InArticleTop">The Joy Of*</a>, a series to help those of us in our 20s and 30s find moments of happiness in the everyday. When rents are rising, fun with friends is more infrequent and we’re struggling with work-life balance, daily life can seem hard. But joy doesn’t have to be something saved for big occasions, like weddings or birthdays. These articles from <a href="https://theconversation.com/uk/topics/quarter-life-117947?utm_source=TCUK&utm_medium=linkback&utm_campaign=UK+YP2023+The+Joy+Of&utm_content=InArticleTop">Quarter Life</a> are aimed to help you find joy in the smallest things.</em></p>
<hr>
<p>Joy also triggers a series of changes in our body.</p>
<p><a href="https://psycnet.apa.org/record/2014-01063-004">When joyous</a>, our breathing becomes faster, our heartbeat increases, and our chest and entire body feel warmer. These sensations are caused by the release of adrenaline that makes our body prepared for engagement and movement, making us feel more mentally prepared to take on <a href="https://psycnet.apa.org/record/2014-01063-004">life’s challenges</a>. These physiological changes are also associated with <a href="https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/pdf/10.1177/0269881108099956">improved mood</a>.</p>
<p>In the brain, joy triggers activity in several <a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3008658/pdf/nihms257673.pdf">pleasure-related hot spots</a> that are distributed throughout the brain. The sensation of joy is then spread to other parts of the central nervous system through <a href="https://www.frontiersin.org/articles/10.3389/fnhum.2016.00571/full">chemical messengers called neurotransmitters</a>. </p>
<p>There are many different types of neurotransmitter – but usually the neurotransmitters dopamine (which is associated with pleasure), serotonin, noradrenaline and endorphins (the body’s natural opiates) are released when we feel joy.</p>
<p>Interestingly, joy is both a <a href="https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/17439760.2017.1414298">trait and a state</a>. This means that while some of us only experience it as a result of a joyful situation, others have a capacity for it – meaning they’re able to experience joy regardless of whether they’ve encountered something joyful. </p>
<figure class="align-center ">
<img alt="A young man in his 20s or 30s gives a big, joyful smile." src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/507348/original/file-20230131-131-3t784x.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/507348/original/file-20230131-131-3t784x.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/507348/original/file-20230131-131-3t784x.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/507348/original/file-20230131-131-3t784x.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/507348/original/file-20230131-131-3t784x.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/507348/original/file-20230131-131-3t784x.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/507348/original/file-20230131-131-3t784x.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px">
<figcaption>
<span class="caption">Joy triggers this kind of big smile, known as the Duchenne smile.</span>
<span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://www.shutterstock.com/image-photo/man-excellent-mood-genuinely-laughs-on-1641340828">Look Studio/ Shutterstock</a></span>
</figcaption>
</figure>
<p>Some research suggests that this capacity is genetic, with estimates that approximately <a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC8584340/">30% of people</a> have what’s known as “genetic plasticity”. This means they’re disproportionately <a href="https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/23025924/">influenced by their external environment</a> – and, after learning techniques to induce joy, may find it easier to experience it. As such, their genetic predisposition for positive experiences can result in more joy. </p>
<p>But just because some people may find it easier to experience joy, that doesn’t mean there aren’t easy things we can all do to help boost our experience of it. </p>
<h2>1. Food</h2>
<p>Sharing food with others can help us <a href="https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/abs/10.1002/mar.21396">experience more joy</a> – and this isn’t just because being in the <a href="https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/full/10.1080/17439760.2019.1685581">company of others</a> boosts our experience of joy. The very act of sharing food can also spark it. This is why research shows that eating with others can enhance what’s known as <a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4802060/00">psychological flourishing</a> – the highest level of wellbeing. </p>
<p>Preparing food with friends and family can also <a href="https://trialsjournal.biomedcentral.com/articles/10.1186/s13063-016-1508-9">stimulate joy</a>. So if you’re looking to add a bit more to your daily life, perhaps go out for dinner with friends – or better yet, arrange a dinner party where you all prep the meal together.</p>
<h2>2. Physical activity</h2>
<p>Whether or not we actually experience joy while exercising depends a lot on the circumstances surrounding the physical activity, rather than the activity itself. </p>
<p>For example, when running with others, we tend to <a href="https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/02614367.2019.1698647">experience more joy</a> than when running on our own. </p>
<p>Research also shows that accomplishing an exercise-related goal we never thought we were capable of can <a href="https://link.springer.com/content/pdf/10.1038/s41598-022-13844-4.pdf">lead to joy</a>. </p>
<p>If you want to use exercise to get more joy in your life, try to set yourself a challenge you want to achieve – and team up with friends on your journey to achieving it. </p>
<h2>3. Writing</h2>
<p>Another simple way you can boost feelings of joy is by writing down how you feel.</p>
<p>In one experiment, participants who spent 20 minutes a day writing about <a href="https://psycnet.apa.org/record/2004-11540-004">intense positive experiences</a> – such as the joy of seeing a family member returning home, or watching your child walk for the first time – for three months experienced better moods compared with participants who wrote about different topics. Those who wrote about their positive experiences also made fewer visits to their doctor in the three-month period.</p>
<hr>
<p>
<em>
<strong>
Read more:
<a href="https://theconversation.com/ive-spent-years-studying-happiness-heres-what-actually-makes-for-a-happier-life-197580">I've spent years studying happiness – here's what actually makes for a happier life</a>
</strong>
</em>
</p>
<hr>
<p>Although the original experiment aimed to re-experience intense positive emotions (such as awe, inspiration or love), you can choose instead to focus solely on feelings of joy. </p>
<p>However, while joy is wonderful to experience, it isn’t the only emotion we’ll encounter in our life. It’s important to try and embrace all the emotions we experience – be that sadness, anger, happiness or joy. </p>
<hr>
<p><em><strong><a href="https://theconversation.com/uk/topics/quarter-life-117947?utm_source=TCUK&utm_medium=linkback&utm_campaign=UK+YP2023+The+Joy+Of&utm_content=InArticleTop">Quarter Life</a></strong> is a series about issues affecting those of us in our 20s and 30s.</em></p>
<hr><img src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/198276/count.gif" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" />
<p class="fine-print"><em><span>The authors do not work for, consult, own shares in or receive funding from any company or organisation that would benefit from this article, and have disclosed no relevant affiliations beyond their academic appointment.</span></em></p>Joy is very different from our other emotions.Jolanta Burke, Senior Lecturer, Centre for Positive Psychology and Health, RCSI University of Medicine and Health SciencesPadraic J. Dunne, Lecturer, Centre of Positive Psychology and Health, RCSI University of Medicine and Health SciencesLicensed as Creative Commons – attribution, no derivatives.tag:theconversation.com,2011:article/1943362023-02-14T19:10:55Z2023-02-14T19:10:55ZHow to get your kids to talk about their feelings<figure><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/508535/original/file-20230207-15-wxxd4r.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&rect=190%2C595%2C7285%2C4702&q=45&auto=format&w=496&fit=clip" /><figcaption><span class="caption">
</span> <span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://unsplash.com/photos/1wAGVmYBxwQ">Annie Spratt/Unsplash</a></span></figcaption></figure><p><a href="https://www.paulekman.com/universal-emotions/">Emotions</a> are core to our human experience, but seeing “negative” emotions in our children – anger, fear, jealousy, envy, sadness, resentment – can make us uncomfortable. </p>
<p>Strong emotions in our kids may trigger our own emotional reactions, and we may feel lost about the best way to respond. </p>
<p>Many of today’s adults grew up not talking about emotions. But as modern parents, we’re told we need to teach our children about their feelings to build their resilience. So how can you encourage your children to talk about their feelings?</p>
<p>Research shows kids learn about emotions in four key ways: our parenting, how we explicitly teach them, our behaviour and the family environment. </p>
<hr>
<p>
<em>
<strong>
Read more:
<a href="https://theconversation.com/my-kid-is-biting-hitting-and-kicking-im-at-my-wits-end-what-can-i-do-194639">My kid is biting, hitting and kicking. I’m at my wit’s end, what can I do?</a>
</strong>
</em>
</p>
<hr>
<h2>1) Our parenting helps kids name, express and manage emotions</h2>
<p>As parents, we play an important role in helping children name, express and manage their emotions. </p>
<p>But this is often not easy. We might be comfortable teaching our children to recognise when they are hungry, tired and thirsty, but be focused on stopping children’s sadness, fears or anger, rather than on teaching about these emotions. </p>
<p>Everyone feels a range of emotions, and the “negative” emotions are not inherently bad. Emotions are signals that are important for our survival and help us to understand ourselves and our world. Children often “act out” their emotions, rather than talking about how they feel. </p>
<figure class="align-center ">
<img alt="Dad talks to his son about emotions" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/508538/original/file-20230207-17-2ev0fv.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/508538/original/file-20230207-17-2ev0fv.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/508538/original/file-20230207-17-2ev0fv.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/508538/original/file-20230207-17-2ev0fv.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/508538/original/file-20230207-17-2ev0fv.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/508538/original/file-20230207-17-2ev0fv.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/508538/original/file-20230207-17-2ev0fv.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px">
<figcaption>
<span class="caption">Everyone feels a range of emotions.</span>
<span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://unsplash.com/photos/eyfaunEy9dM">Max Harlynking/Unsplash</a></span>
</figcaption>
</figure>
<p>When we teach kids that all emotions are healthy, they learn to trust themselves, feel more comfortable sharing their feelings, and view emotions as brief experiences that pass. </p>
<p>So, what should we say in the moment?</p>
<ol>
<li><p>Start by describing what you see or observe. “You sound sad/angry?” or “You are looking a little quiet.” </p></li>
<li><p>We often don’t know exactly what our child is feeling. Be tentative and check: “You look frustrated, is that right?”</p></li>
<li><p>Validate: “That situation was really hard, no wonder you’re frustrated.”</p></li>
<li><p>When our child is upset, we don’t need to say much. Try to listen and connect through eye contact and gentle touch. As University of Houston professor of social work and author <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KZBTYViDPlQ&ab_channel=DianaSimonPsihoterapeut">Brené Brown</a> reminds us, it is not about having the right words, but instead about offering support and connection.</p></li>
<li><p>Avoid trying to fix (problem-solve) or distract your child when they are emotional. Support kids to acknowledge and “sit with” their feelings.</p></li>
<li><p>Older children and teens may learn how to start masking their emotions, so we might only see their challenging behaviours. Imagine their behaviour is the tip of an iceberg, caused by emotions under the surface. Try connecting with their emotion rather than focusing only on the behaviour, “You slammed your door, are you feeling upset?” </p></li>
</ol>
<figure class="align-center zoomable">
<a href="https://images.theconversation.com/files/508512/original/file-20230206-17-pymzdx.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=1000&fit=clip"><img alt="Picture of an iceberg submerged in water, with the word " src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/508512/original/file-20230206-17-pymzdx.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/508512/original/file-20230206-17-pymzdx.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=731&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/508512/original/file-20230206-17-pymzdx.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=731&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/508512/original/file-20230206-17-pymzdx.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=731&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/508512/original/file-20230206-17-pymzdx.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=919&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/508512/original/file-20230206-17-pymzdx.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=919&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/508512/original/file-20230206-17-pymzdx.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=919&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px"></a>
<figcaption>
<span class="caption">Challenging behaviours are often just the tip of the iceberg. Recognising what lies beneath the surface can help children learn about emotions and identify important needs.</span>
<span class="attribution"><span class="source">Teachers Tuning in to Kids/Tuning in to Teens Whole
School Approach</span></span>
</figcaption>
</figure>
<h2>2) Parents can explicitly teach kids about emotions</h2>
<p>When everyone’s calm (<em>not</em> when you or your child are upset), we can teach kids about emotions. </p>
<p>We can start conversations about emotions based on almost anything your child is interested in, a TV show, video game, movie, or book they’re reading. A great movie for starting the conversation is <a href="https://www.pixar.com/feature-films/inside-out">Inside Out</a>. </p>
<hr>
<p>
<em>
<strong>
Read more:
<a href="https://theconversation.com/inside-out-shows-well-being-isnt-just-about-chasing-happiness-43629">Inside Out shows well-being isn't just about chasing happiness</a>
</strong>
</em>
</p>
<hr>
<p>Watching emotions in fictional characters normalises emotions as a universal experience and helps kids to recognise more subtle types of emotions and different ways to express and manage emotions.</p>
<p>For older kids who’ve become more self-conscious, try having these discussions when not directly looking at them, in the car, or during an activity (walking, kicking a ball, watching a movie together). Some kids open up more at bedtime. Try to listen more and talk less.</p>
<h2>3) Children watch and learn from us</h2>
<p>Many of us grew up in families where parents did not teach us about emotions, or they were poor role models for expressing emotions in healthy ways. </p>
<p>If this is the case, it’s common to view emotions as bad and unhelpful, and believe it’s not good to dwell on feelings.</p>
<p>As a result, it can be hard to watch our children experiencing strong negative emotions. If you’re feeling triggered by your child’s emotion, it will help to pause. You can leave the room if necessary. It’s healthy to role-model to kids taking a break when we feel overwhelmed. </p>
<figure class="align-right ">
<img alt="Mother and child walk" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/508533/original/file-20230207-25-n2ozy4.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&rect=0%2C1388%2C2000%2C1607&q=45&auto=format&w=237&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/508533/original/file-20230207-25-n2ozy4.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=899&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/508533/original/file-20230207-25-n2ozy4.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=899&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/508533/original/file-20230207-25-n2ozy4.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=899&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/508533/original/file-20230207-25-n2ozy4.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=1129&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/508533/original/file-20230207-25-n2ozy4.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=1129&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/508533/original/file-20230207-25-n2ozy4.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=1129&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px">
<figcaption>
<span class="caption">Parents can explain how they were feeling in certain situations.</span>
<span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://unsplash.com/photos/RRZM3cwS1DU">James Wheeler/Unsplash</a></span>
</figcaption>
</figure>
<p>If we make a mistake as parents and act in ways we’re not proud of, this is a great opportunity to model to our kids how to make amends. </p>
<p>Explain what you were feeling, that your actions were not okay, and apologise. This gives kids a template for making amends themselves, which is a critical relationship skill. </p>
<p>If you often struggle managing your own emotions, learning about emotions is a good start. Two great books are: </p>
<ol>
<li><a href="https://www.marcbrackett.com/">Permission to Feel</a> (Marc Brackett)</li>
<li><a href="https://www.booktopia.com.au/the-a-to-z-of-feelings-andrew-fuller/book/9780645069013.html">The A to Z of Feelings</a> (Andrew Fuller and Sam Fuller). </li>
</ol>
<hr>
<p>
<em>
<strong>
Read more:
<a href="https://theconversation.com/anxiety-can-look-different-in-children-heres-what-to-look-for-and-some-treatments-to-consider-189685">Anxiety can look different in children. Here's what to look for and some treatments to consider</a>
</strong>
</em>
</p>
<hr>
<h2>4) Kids are affected by relationships in the family</h2>
<p>Emotions are contagious. Kids are affected by other relationships in the family, including conflict between parents. </p>
<p>Remember, conflict is a healthy human experience and cannot be eliminated.
Instead, it’s important to show kids healthy conflict, where we all express emotions in a respectful way. </p>
<p>It’s also important that kids see healthy conflict resolution. </p>
<h2>Where can you get help?</h2>
<p>Here are three evidence-based parenting programs focused on helping parents teach children about emotions:</p>
<ul>
<li><p><a href="https://tuningintokids.org.au/parents/">Tuning in to Kids/Teens</a> focuses on the emotional connection between parents/carers and their children, from toddlers to teens</p></li>
<li><p><a href="https://partnersinparenting.com.au/">Partners in Parenting</a> is designed to help you raise your teenager 12-17 years to prevent depression and anxiety</p></li>
<li><p><a href="https://thisparentinglife.com.au/circle-of-security-parenting-online/">Circle Of Security Parenting</a> improves child development by strengthening the parent-child attachment when children are aged 0-12 years.</p></li>
</ul><img src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/194336/count.gif" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" />
<p class="fine-print"><em><span>Associate Professor Elizabeth Westrupp receives funding from the National Health and Medical Research Council (NHMRC, GNT2019442)</span></em></p><p class="fine-print"><em><span>Dr Christiane Kehoe is co-author on the Tuning in to Kids suite of programs and receives royalties from the sale of the facilitator manuals used by clinicians who deliver the parenting groups. </span></em></p>Many of us grew up not talking about emotions. But as modern parents, we’re told we need to teach our children about their feelings to build their resilience. So how do we do it?Elizabeth Westrupp, Associate Professor in Psychology, Deakin UniversityChristiane Kehoe, Research manager and program specialist Tuning in to Kids, The University of MelbourneLicensed as Creative Commons – attribution, no derivatives.tag:theconversation.com,2011:article/1961982023-01-09T13:27:13Z2023-01-09T13:27:13ZHow to unlock your creativity – even if you see yourself as a conventional thinker<figure><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/502966/original/file-20230103-19747-jirq1v.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&rect=988%2C322%2C5741%2C3925&q=45&auto=format&w=496&fit=clip" /><figcaption><span class="caption">People engage in creative thinking every day, whether they realize it or not.</span> <span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://www.gettyimages.com/detail/photo/creative-mind-locking-concept-background-royalty-free-image/1445259503?phrase=brain unlocked&adppopup=true">Ekaterina Chizhevskaya/iStock via Getty Images</a></span></figcaption></figure><p>Do you think that creativity is an innate gift? Think again. </p>
<p>Many people believe that creative thinking is difficult – that the ability to come up with ideas in novel and interesting ways graces only some talented individuals and not most others. </p>
<p>The media <a href="https://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2011/11/14/the-tweaker">often portrays</a> creatives as those with quirky personalities and unique talent. Researchers have also identified numerous personality traits that are associated with creativity, such as <a href="https://doi.org/10.1002/jocb.170">openness to new experiences, ideas and perspectives</a>.</p>
<p>Together, they seem to paint a dire picture for those who consider themselves conventional thinkers, as well as those who do not work in creative occupations – including roles that are often considered traditional and noncreative, such as accountants and data analysts.</p>
<p>These beliefs miss a key part of how creativity works in your brain: Creative thinking is actually something you engage in every day, whether you realize it or not. </p>
<p>Moreover, creativity is a skill that can be strengthened. This matters even for people who don’t consider themselves creative or who aren’t in creative fields. </p>
<p><a href="https://doi.org/10.1016/j.obhdp.2022.104209">In research</a> that I recently published with organization and management scholars <a href="https://merage.uci.edu/research-faculty/faculty-directory/Christopher-Bauman.html">Chris Bauman</a> and <a href="https://merage.uci.edu/research-faculty/faculty-directory/Maia-Young.html">Maia Young</a>, we found that simply reinterpreting a frustrating situation can enhance the creativity of conventional thinkers.</p>
<h2>Using creative thinking to cope with emotions</h2>
<p>Creativity is often defined as the generation of ideas or insights that are novel and useful. That is, creative thoughts are original and unexpected, but also feasible and useful.</p>
<p>Everyday examples of creativity are plentiful: combining leftover food to make a tasty new dish, coming up with a new way to accomplish chores, mixing old outfits to create a new look. </p>
<p>Another way you do this is when you practice what’s called “<a href="https://psycnet.apa.org/fulltext/2020-03346-001.html">emotional reappraisal</a>” – viewing a situation through another lens to change your feelings. There is an element of creativity to this: You’re breaking away from your existing perspectives and assumptions and coming up with a new way of thinking.</p>
<p>Say you’re frustrated about a parking ticket. To alleviate the bad feelings, you can think of the fine as a learning moment.</p>
<p>If you’re anxious about a presentation for work, <a href="https://digitalcollections.babson.edu/digital/collection/ferpapers/id/2848/rec/8">you can cope with the anxiety by framing it</a> as an opportunity to share ideas, rather than as a high-stakes performance that could result in demotion if handled poorly.</p>
<p>And if you’re angry that someone seemed unnecessarily combative in a conversation, you might reevaluate the situation, coming to view the behavior as unintentional rather than malicious. </p>
<h2>Training your creative muscles</h2>
<p>To test the link between creative thinking and emotional reappraisal, <a href="https://doi.org/10.1016/j.obhdp.2022.104209">we surveyed 279 people</a>. Those who ranked higher on creativity tended to reappraise emotional events more often in their daily life. </p>
<p>Inspired by the link between emotional reappraisal and creative thinking, we wanted to see whether we could use this insight to develop ways to help people be more creative. In other words, could emotional reappraisal be practiced by people in order to train their creative muscles?</p>
<p>We ran two experiments in which two new samples of participants – 512 in total – encountered scenarios designed to provoke an emotional response. We tasked them with using one of three approaches to manage their emotions. We told some participants to suppress their emotional response, others to think about something else to distract themselves and the last group to reappraise the situation by looking at it through a different lens. Some participants were also given no instructions on how to manage their feelings. </p>
<p>In a seemingly unrelated task that followed, we asked the participants to come up with creative ideas to solve a problem at work.</p>
<p>In the experiments, conventional thinkers who tried reappraisal came up with ideas that were more creative than other conventional thinkers who used suppression, distraction or received no instructions at all. </p>
<h2>Cultivating flexible thinking</h2>
<p>Negative emotions are inevitable in work and life. Yet people often hide their negative feelings from others, or use distraction to avoid thinking about their frustrations.</p>
<p>Our findings have implications for how managers can think about how to best leverage the skills of their workers. Managers commonly slot job candidates into creative and noncreative jobs <a href="https://doi.org/10.1177/0001839215616840">based on cues</a> that signal creative potential. Not only are these cues <a href="https://journals.aom.org/doi/abs/10.5465/30040623">shaky predictors of performance</a>, but this hiring practice may also limit managers’ access to employees whose knowledge and experience can play major roles in generating creative outcomes. </p>
<p>The result is that the creative potential of a significant part of the workforce may be underutilized. Our findings suggest that supervisors can develop training and interventions to cultivate creativity in their employees – even for those who might not seem predisposed to creativity.</p>
<p>Our research also indicates that people can practice flexible thinking every day when they experience negative emotions. Although people may not always have control over the external circumstances, they do have the liberty to choose how to cope with emotional situations – and they can do so in ways that facilitate their productivity and well-being.</p><img src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/196198/count.gif" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" />
<p class="fine-print"><em><span>Lily Zhu does not work for, consult, own shares in or receive funding from any company or organization that would benefit from this article, and has disclosed no relevant affiliations beyond their academic appointment.</span></em></p>New research highlights how anyone can train their creative muscles by rethinking the anxiety, frustration and anger they encounter in daily life.Lily Zhu, Assistant Professor of Management, Information Systems and Entrepreneurship, Washington State UniversityLicensed as Creative Commons – attribution, no derivatives.tag:theconversation.com,2011:article/1941632023-01-03T19:16:57Z2023-01-03T19:16:57ZKids driving you crazy? Try these science-backed anger management tips for parents<figure><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/493994/original/file-20221108-25-n12318.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&rect=0%2C8%2C6000%2C3979&q=45&auto=format&w=496&fit=clip" /><figcaption><span class="caption">
</span> <span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://www.pexels.com/photo/angry-black-woman-screaming-in-room-6382710/">Photo by Liza Summer/Pexels</a>, <a class="license" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/">CC BY</a></span></figcaption></figure><p>You’re running late for work, your eight-year-old can’t find the homework they were supposed to have put in their school bag last night, your four-year-old objects to the blue t-shirt you’d prepared and wants the other shade of blue, and then you step on a Lego piece that didn’t get packed away when you asked.</p>
<p>Even if you haven’t encountered this exact situation, just thinking about it might raise your hackles. Parenting comes with many emotions. Anger and frustration are not uncommon and may have been <a href="https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s10896-022-00379-5">exacerbated</a> by the stressors of the COVID-19 pandemic.</p>
<p>It’s OK for children to see parents experience and manage different emotions. But when getting angry, yelling and shouting are a default response, this can have negative consequences for children (and parents). </p>
<p>Here’s what you can do instead.</p>
<figure class="align-center zoomable">
<a href="https://images.theconversation.com/files/493995/original/file-20221108-19-n12318.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=1000&fit=clip"><img alt="A woman grasps her head in fury." src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/493995/original/file-20221108-19-n12318.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/493995/original/file-20221108-19-n12318.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/493995/original/file-20221108-19-n12318.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/493995/original/file-20221108-19-n12318.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/493995/original/file-20221108-19-n12318.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/493995/original/file-20221108-19-n12318.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/493995/original/file-20221108-19-n12318.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px"></a>
<figcaption>
<span class="caption">When getting angry, yelling and shouting are a default response, it’s a problem.</span>
<span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://www.pexels.com/photo/woman-holding-her-head-2128817/">Photo by David Garrison/Pexels</a>, <a class="license" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/">CC BY</a></span>
</figcaption>
</figure>
<hr>
<p>
<em>
<strong>
Read more:
<a href="https://theconversation.com/it-may-be-awkward-but-we-need-to-talk-to-kids-about-porn-43066">It may be awkward, but we need to talk to kids about porn</a>
</strong>
</em>
</p>
<hr>
<h2>When is anger a problem and what’s at stake?</h2>
<p>Anger is a problem when it is too frequent, too intense or when it disrupts your relationships. </p>
<p>Parental hostility has been associated with:</p>
<ul>
<li><p><a href="https://srcd.onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/full/10.1111/cdep.12095">children’s executive functioning</a> (their ability to think and reason)</p></li>
<li><p><a href="https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0273229711000268">relational aggression</a> (aggression toward others)</p></li>
<li><p><a href="https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0165032715000543">internalising problems</a>; and </p></li>
<li><p><a href="https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0301051118301248">anxiety</a>. </p></li>
</ul>
<p>One study found children who received harsh verbal discipline were likely to experience <a href="https://srcd.onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/full/10.1111/cdev.12143">more symptoms of depression and behavioural problems as adolescents</a>.</p>
<p>A parent’s propensity to <a href="https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0272735821001422?casa_token=xximau3MPqwAAAAA:4RT336prdQNIYUV0FoYvsT7IxSjdM3EAROFqrGA-iIJaLSbVQ1cxdXFsxTmbbzkx3D8dbDz3PHE">react emotionally</a> can increase the likelihood parents will react more harshly, punish their child excessively, or smack their child.</p>
<p>Extensive research has shown <a href="https://theconversation.com/research-shows-its-harmful-to-smack-your-child-so-what-should-parents-do-instead-186739">smacking</a> is harmful for children’s development.</p>
<h2>Reducing the risk of conflict</h2>
<p>Parenting isn’t easy and doesn’t come with a manual. Many everyday situations can contribute to parents experiencing irritation and anger.</p>
<p>The best way to manage anger is to try to reduce the likelihood these situations will arise. </p>
<p>Parenting programs that focus on positive parenting practices, can improve the lives of <a href="https://link.springer.com/epdf/10.1007/s10578-021-01309-0?sharing_token=85NNTOc3CNC5kn-fajy7i_e4RwlQNchNByi7wbcMAY4Jlx2ius8ljlvrVOy52z-wmj_Wb5N___MA4OIwvlD96BmGxgVoxQ84eVaeLtRuDZuwXugqjjACjFJiNZEINYAPNOHyHwydOkqAjL3TILpXaxOyfO78uGKWeMiMRrW9ids%3D">children, parents and families</a>, decrease <a href="https://psycnet.apa.org/fulltext/2006-03253-002.html">parent anger</a> and <a href="https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S1132055915000502">reduce the risk of maltreatment</a>. Many evidence-based parenting programs are available.</p>
<p>Important strategies to reduce the likelihood of problems arising in the first place include:</p>
<ul>
<li><p>focusing on the positive</p></li>
<li><p>building strong relationships with children</p></li>
<li><p>communicating effectively </p></li>
<li><p>praising children</p></li>
<li><p>teaching children independence skills</p></li>
<li><p>putting in place effective family routines</p></li>
<li><p>having clear rules and boundaries and backing them up with appropriate consequences.</p></li>
</ul>
<figure class="align-center zoomable">
<a href="https://images.theconversation.com/files/496099/original/file-20221118-24-hzn3fw.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=1000&fit=clip"><img alt="A father and son are set against a sunset background." src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/496099/original/file-20221118-24-hzn3fw.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/496099/original/file-20221118-24-hzn3fw.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/496099/original/file-20221118-24-hzn3fw.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/496099/original/file-20221118-24-hzn3fw.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/496099/original/file-20221118-24-hzn3fw.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/496099/original/file-20221118-24-hzn3fw.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/496099/original/file-20221118-24-hzn3fw.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px"></a>
<figcaption>
<span class="caption">Building strong relationships with children reduced the risk of problems arising in the first place.</span>
<span class="attribution"><span class="source">Shutterstock</span></span>
</figcaption>
</figure>
<h2>Looking after yourself</h2>
<p>It is much harder to be calm, patient and persistent when parents’ own needs are not met and when parents are stressed or under pressure.</p>
<p>An important aspect of managing emotional reactivity is to look after your own wellbeing. </p>
<p>Take time out for yourself, balance your work and family responsibilities, and talk to your partner or other carers and support people about how you can get some time to yourself.</p>
<p>Strategies based on <a href="https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S2352250X17300520?casa_token=wCqIPvFo74YAAAAA:JIAi7SddE-zLHxO73vE5420Ch_J15-yz2N08QyNsi5jW-vY37qxAfer2Wg3BeR0ZcqR8hZckpkA">cognitive behavioural approaches</a> – such as relaxation and breathing exercises – can also be helpful ways to reduce anger.</p>
<figure class="align-center zoomable">
<a href="https://images.theconversation.com/files/496098/original/file-20221118-14-dhxfk4.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=1000&fit=clip"><img alt="A woman walks in the bush." src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/496098/original/file-20221118-14-dhxfk4.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/496098/original/file-20221118-14-dhxfk4.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/496098/original/file-20221118-14-dhxfk4.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/496098/original/file-20221118-14-dhxfk4.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/496098/original/file-20221118-14-dhxfk4.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/496098/original/file-20221118-14-dhxfk4.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/496098/original/file-20221118-14-dhxfk4.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px"></a>
<figcaption>
<span class="caption">It’s important for parents to take time out for themselves, where possible.</span>
<span class="attribution"><span class="source">Shutterstock</span></span>
</figcaption>
</figure>
<h2>OK but I still need help managing my anger in the moment. What now?</h2>
<p>So you’ve done the parenting program, you’re looking after yourself and still you find yourself struggling to tame your anger. That Lego piece really hurt and how many times do you have to ask for things to be packed up anyway?</p>
<p>Sometimes even the best preparation and prevention strategies may not avoid a particular problem, so having a plan for what you can do in that moment is important.</p>
<p>When fury rages inside you, start by taking a few deep breaths. Focusing on relaxing muscles or counting to ten – anything to slow down your emotional reaction – can be helpful. </p>
<p>Remind yourself your child hasn’t done this on purpose and that while it’s frustrating, you <em>can</em> stay calm.</p>
<p>What we say to ourselves about a situation and why it happened can also increase our feelings of anger. </p>
<p>Research shows the attributions we make – meaning the explanations or reasons we have for situations or for our child’s behaviour – can play an <a href="https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/full/10.1080/15295192.2016.1184954">important role</a> in the way we react emotionally.</p>
<p>For example, if you think your child is deliberately trying to make your life miserable with their t-shirt choices, you are more likely to feel angry.</p>
<p>If, on the other hand, you say to yourself, “This is important to them and they’re only four,” you are much more likely to stay calm. </p>
<p>Try to catch the negative thoughts that come into your head in those situations that make you feel angry. Replace them with more helpful ones. </p>
<p>For examples, rather than saying “This is just not fair” you could say “This is upsetting, but I can deal with it.” It might feel awkward at first, but give it a try. </p>
<p>Anger is a human emotion. It can motivate us to persist in the face of difficulties, can be a way of reducing tension and can act as a signal to deal with a stressor we’re facing. </p>
<p>It can also cause harm to ourselves, our children and our relationships if it is not managed well. </p>
<p>Finding effective ways to positively manage those feelings of annoyance and irritation is important to ensuring positive family relationships.</p>
<hr>
<p>
<em>
<strong>
Read more:
<a href="https://theconversation.com/what-parents-can-do-to-make-a-childs-chronic-illness-easier-41359">What parents can do to make a child's chronic illness easier</a>
</strong>
</em>
</p>
<hr>
<img src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/194163/count.gif" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" />
<p class="fine-print"><em><span>The Parenting and Family Support Centre is partly funded by royalties stemming from published resources of the Triple P – Positive Parenting Program, which is developed and owned by The University of Queensland (UQ). Royalties are also distributed to the Faculty of Health and Behavioural Sciences at UQ and contributory authors of published Triple P resources. Triple P International (TPI) Pty Ltd is a private company licensed by Uniquest Pty Ltd on behalf of UQ, to publish and disseminate Triple P worldwide. Dr Morawska has no share or ownership of TPI. Dr Morawska receives royalties from TPI. TPI had no involvement in the writing of this articles. Dr Morawska is an employee at UQ. Dr Morawska is on the Board of Directors of the Parenting and Family Research Alliance.</span></em></p>The best way to manage anger is to try to reduce the likelihood that these situations will arise. But even so, having a plan for what can you do when anger strikes is important.Alina Morawska, Deputy Director (Research), Parenting and Family Support Centre, The University of QueenslandLicensed as Creative Commons – attribution, no derivatives.tag:theconversation.com,2011:article/1928032022-11-28T13:32:28Z2022-11-28T13:32:28ZHow can you tell if something is true? Here are 3 questions to ask yourself about what you see, hear and read<figure><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/494543/original/file-20221109-24-smerzw.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&rect=0%2C8%2C5751%2C3819&q=45&auto=format&w=496&fit=clip" /><figcaption><span class="caption">Emotions can get in the way of knowing what’s true.</span> <span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://www.gettyimages.com/detail/photo/girl-lying-on-bed-at-night-and-using-a-mobile-phone-royalty-free-image/1213627011">Elva Etienne/Moment via Getty Images</a></span></figcaption></figure><figure class="align-left ">
<img alt="" src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/281719/original/file-20190628-76743-26slbc.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=237&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/281719/original/file-20190628-76743-26slbc.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=293&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/281719/original/file-20190628-76743-26slbc.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=293&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/281719/original/file-20190628-76743-26slbc.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=293&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/281719/original/file-20190628-76743-26slbc.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=368&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/281719/original/file-20190628-76743-26slbc.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=368&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/281719/original/file-20190628-76743-26slbc.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=368&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px">
<figcaption>
<span class="caption"></span>
</figcaption>
</figure>
<p><em><a href="https://theconversation.com/us/topics/curious-kids-us-74795">Curious Kids</a> is a series for children of all ages. If you have a question you’d like an expert to answer, send it to <a href="mailto:curiouskidsus@theconversation.com">curiouskidsus@theconversation.com</a>.</em></p>
<hr>
<blockquote>
<p><strong>How can I tell if what I am hearing is true? – Adam, age 10, Maui, Hawaii</strong></p>
</blockquote>
<hr>
<p>Have you ever heard a story so exciting you wanted to share it right away? Something like a shark swimming up a flooded highway?</p>
<p><div data-react-class="Tweet" data-react-props="{"tweetId":"1575245113387024384"}"></div></p>
<p>An image that seems to show just that was shared by many people after Hurricane Ian struck Florida in 2022. It was also <a href="https://twitter.com/dalysshanson/status/901949237306515457?s=20&t=l_bsAXkKKIVmp_XwGWGkyw">widely shared after Hurricane Harvey</a> hit Houston, Texas, in 2017. It’s a fake – a flooded highway image combined with one of a great white shark. The fact-checking website <a href="https://www.snopes.com/fact-check/shark-street-hurricane/">Snopes found it circulating as far back as 2011</a> after Hurricane Irene slammed Puerto Rico.</p>
<p>Truth can be tricky to determine. Every message you read, see or hear comes from somewhere and was created by someone and for someone. </p>
<p><a href="https://scholar.google.com/citations?hl=en&user=XV5-t-YAAAAJ">I teach media literacy</a>, which is a way to think about <a href="https://mediaeducationlab.com/what-media-literacy-0">information you get in the messages you receive via media</a>. You might think media means the news, but it also includes TikTok posts, television, books, advertisements and more. </p>
<p>When deciding whether to trust a piece of information, it’s good to start with three main questions – who said it, what evidence did they give and how much do you want to believe it? The last one might seem a little strange, but you’ll see why it’s important by the end.</p>
<h2>Who said it?</h2>
<p>Let’s say you’re really excited about a game that’s coming out later this year. You want to be the first to learn about the new creatures, characters and game modes. So when a YouTube video pops up saying, “GAME COMING TWO WEEKS EARLY,” you can’t wait to watch. But when you click, it’s just a guy making predictions. Do you trust him?</p>
<p>A source is where information comes from. You get information from sources every day – from teachers, parents and friends to people you’ve never met on news sites, fan channels and social media. You probably have sources you trust and ones you don’t. But why? </p>
<p>Would you trust your history teacher to tell you something about history? Probably, because they have a college degree that says they know their stuff. But what if your history teacher told you a fact about science your science teacher said was untrue? You’d probably be better off going with the science teacher for your science facts. Just because a source is trustworthy in one subject doesn’t mean they’re trustworthy in every subject. </p>
<p>Let’s go back to the YouTuber. If you’ve watched him for a while and he’s reliably correct, that’s a good start. At the same time, make sure you don’t confuse his having an opinion with <a href="https://games.abc.net.au/education/interactive-lessons/fact-opinion-analysis/">actually having knowledge</a>. Just because you like a source doesn’t make it trustworthy.</p>
<p>This is true for websites, too. When a site grabs your attention, take a second to check the source at the top. Some fake sites use names that sound trustworthy – like “Boston Tribune” instead of “Boston Globe” or “www.cbs.com.co” instead of “www.cbs.com.” You can click the “About” page to see where they’re really coming from, use <a href="https://www.snopes.com/news/2016/01/14/fake-news-sites/">lists of known fake sites</a> and <a href="https://www.iste.org/explore/Digital-and-media-literacy/Top-10-sites-to-help-students-check-their-facts">other fact-checking resources</a> to avoid getting played.</p>
<figure class="align-center zoomable">
<a href="https://images.theconversation.com/files/490701/original/file-20221019-13-hjntlz.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&rect=0%2C0%2C5991%2C3988&q=45&auto=format&w=1000&fit=clip"><img alt="Boy in baseball cap looking at his phone outside on street corner." src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/490701/original/file-20221019-13-hjntlz.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&rect=0%2C0%2C5991%2C3988&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/490701/original/file-20221019-13-hjntlz.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/490701/original/file-20221019-13-hjntlz.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/490701/original/file-20221019-13-hjntlz.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/490701/original/file-20221019-13-hjntlz.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/490701/original/file-20221019-13-hjntlz.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/490701/original/file-20221019-13-hjntlz.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px"></a>
<figcaption>
<span class="caption">Don’t believe everything you see.</span>
<span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://www.gettyimages.com/detail/photo/asian-teenage-boy-playing-with-cellphone-outdoors-royalty-free-image/1345235981">imtmphoto/iStock/Getty Images Plus</a></span>
</figcaption>
</figure>
<h2>What’s the evidence?</h2>
<p>Evidence is what you show when someone says “prove it!” It’s the details that support what a source is saying. </p>
<p>Primary sources – people or groups who are directly involved with the information – are best. If you want to learn about the release of a new game, the company’s official accounts or channels would be primary sources. </p>
<p>Secondary sources are one step removed – for example, news stories based on primary sources. They aren’t as strong as primary sources but are still useful. For example, most news on <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1FLlHr38_bI">gaming site IGN</a> is based on information from game company sources, so it’s a good secondary source. </p>
<p>Can a blogger or YouTuber be a secondary source? If their claims start by referencing primary sources like “Electronic Arts says,” that’s good. But if they start with “I think” or “There’s a lot of buzz,” be careful.</p>
<h2>Do you want to believe it?</h2>
<p>Emotions can get in the way of knowing what’s true. Messages that make you feel strong emotions – especially ones that are funny or make you angry – are the most important ones to check, but <a href="https://www.middleweb.com/34145/how-media-appeals-to-our-emotions/">they’re also the hardest to ignore</a>.</p>
<p>Advertisers know this. Many ads try to be funny or make the things they’re selling look cool because they want you to focus on how you feel rather than what you think. And being older doesn’t mean you’re automatically better at spotting false information: 41% of 18-to-34-year-olds and 44% of adults 65 and older <a href="https://newslit.org/tips-tools/did-you-know-oldest-youngest-fake-news/">admitted to having fallen for a fake news story</a> in a 2018 study. Other research showed adults over 65 were seven times as likely to <a href="https://www.science.org/doi/10.1126/sciadv.aau4586">share articles from fake sites</a> as younger people were.</p>
<p>So if you’ve been eagerly waiting for that new game, and somebody posts a video that says it’s coming out early, your wanting it to be true can make you ignore your common sense – leaving you open to being fooled. </p>
<p>The best question you can ask yourself when you’re thinking about a message is, “Do I want to believe this?” If the answer is yes, it’s a good sign you should slow down and check the source and evidence more closely.</p>
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<p><em>Hello, curious kids! Do you have a question you’d like an expert to answer? Ask an adult to send your question to <a href="mailto:curiouskidsus@theconversation.com">CuriousKidsUS@theconversation.com</a>. Please tell us your name, age and the city where you live.</em></p>
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<p class="fine-print"><em><span>Bob Britten does not work for, consult, own shares in or receive funding from any company or organization that would benefit from this article, and has disclosed no relevant affiliations beyond their academic appointment.</span></em></p>What’s true and what’s not? An expert in media literacy explains how to evaluate information.Bob Britten, Teaching Associate Professor of Media, West Virginia UniversityLicensed as Creative Commons – attribution, no derivatives.tag:theconversation.com,2011:article/1904892022-11-17T20:40:01Z2022-11-17T20:40:01Z5 ways to create a compassionate workplace culture and help workers recover from burnout<figure><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/495481/original/file-20221115-23-xns9l3.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&rect=112%2C0%2C3147%2C1471&q=45&auto=format&w=496&fit=clip" /><figcaption><span class="caption">Creating a compassionate workplace culture involves acknowledging people's challenges,
even related to apparently small matters, in professionally appropriate ways. </span> <span class="attribution"><span class="source">(Shutterstock)</span></span></figcaption></figure><iframe style="width: 100%; height: 100px; border: none; position: relative; z-index: 1;" allowtransparency="" allow="clipboard-read; clipboard-write" src="https://narrations.ad-auris.com/widget/the-conversation-canada/5-ways-to-create-a-compassionate-workplace-culture-and--help-workers-recover-from-burnout" width="100%" height="400"></iframe>
<p>We live in tumultuous times which can create an added layer of uncertainty for employees who need to build relationships with students, patients or clients. Providing calm, confident and warm <a href="https://www.edcan.ca/articles/teacher-emotional-well-being/">emotional labour</a> can be difficult for people experiencing burnout, grief or compassion fatigue. </p>
<p>I have been studying the <a href="https://doi.org/10.18848/2156-8960/CGP/v13i01/31-55">impact of compassion fatigue and burnout</a>, as well as the nature of emotional labour, in educational settings. </p>
<p>Workplace culture has emerged as a critical element to prevent burnout and support employees experiencing emotional distress.</p>
<p>Organizations that promote a sense of <a href="https://doi.org/10.2189/asqu.51.1.59">collective compassion</a> — by supporting noticing, feeling and acting on the suffering of others at the workplace — may see improvements in both <a href="https://doi.org/10.1093/oxfordhb/9780199734610.013.0021">employee performance and job satisfaction</a>. </p>
<h2>Compassionate work culture</h2>
<p>The emotions of sympathy, empathy and compassion play an important role in developing a compassionate work culture, by helping us pay attention, in professionally appropriate ways, to the suffering of our students, patients, clients, colleagues, managers and leaders. </p>
<p>Sympathy — the <a href="https://doi.org/10.1177/0269216316663499">superficial recognition of the distress of another individual</a> — is the first step towards developing a compassionate workplace. It helps us notice the suffering of others. </p>
<p>The <a href="https://cmha.ca/empathy-a-skill-you-can-learn/">emotion of empathy</a> compels us to take the time and attention to investigate and understand the response of the individual in distress. Compassion is noticing, <a href="https://psycnet.apa.org/doi/10.1037/pspi0000010">feeling and then acting on the suffering of others</a>. </p>
<p>Workers’ acknowledgement and response to these emotions vary according to their professional duties and boundaries. But compassionate action can make the difference at the workplace, whether through small moments of kind interpersonal interaction or sustained collective effort to address complex and multifaceted challenges. </p>
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<img alt="A figure seen with arrows pointing to a cloud or a heart." src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/495457/original/file-20221115-12-mtcg5a.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/495457/original/file-20221115-12-mtcg5a.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/495457/original/file-20221115-12-mtcg5a.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/495457/original/file-20221115-12-mtcg5a.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/495457/original/file-20221115-12-mtcg5a.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/495457/original/file-20221115-12-mtcg5a.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/495457/original/file-20221115-12-mtcg5a.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px">
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<span class="caption">Sympathy helps us notice the suffering of another human being.</span>
<span class="attribution"><span class="source">(Shutterstock)</span></span>
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<h2>Responding to co-workers</h2>
<p>An example of how these emotions help to create a compassionate workplace would be the familiar case of a person struggling with a new software program, such as an expense reporting system. </p>
<p>A sympathetic response by a colleague would be to notice that a co-worker is spending too much time inputting their expenses into the management system, and to say, “The new system is tricky! Good luck!” and then walk away.</p>
<p>Empathy would prompt the colleague to seek to understand what the co-worker was already doing (rather than jumping in with an immediate solution) so that the colleague can figure out the origin of the frustration. Empathetic listening takes time.</p>
<p>Having felt similarly frustrated, the colleague may feel compassion and feel compelled to act by scheduling time during the next reporting period to sit with and help the co-worker complete their expense submission. If, through empathetic listening and compassionate action, further action is warranted, the colleague may offer to raise the problem as a larger systemic issue related to software training with management.</p>
<h2>Compassion in action</h2>
<p>Building an organizational culture that encourages compassion requires employers and employees to create time and space for listening. The <a href="https://www.nctsn.org/what-is-child-trauma">cause of a person’s distress</a>, whether displayed in the workplace or not, can be complex, multi-faceted and not easily solved.</p>
<p><a href="https://www.academia.edu/19886190/Figley_C_R_1995_Compassion_Fatigue_Toward_a_New_Understanding_of_the_Costs_of_Caring">Compassion satisfaction</a>, or the joy and pleasure of providing care to others, provides the caregiver with the long-term fortitude to help others. </p>
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Read more:
<a href="https://theconversation.com/commit-to-a-wellness-streak-to-help-manage-work-stressors-174592">Commit to a 'wellness streak' to help manage work stressors</a>
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<p>While compassion is <a href="https://www.drshanesinclair.com/blog/sympathy-empathy-and-compassion">not itself limited or easily extinguished</a>, acting on it can be slowed or stopped by burnout or compassion fatigue. </p>
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<img alt="A heart made of lego has some of the pieces flying away." src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/495464/original/file-20221115-13-url2je.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/495464/original/file-20221115-13-url2je.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/495464/original/file-20221115-13-url2je.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/495464/original/file-20221115-13-url2je.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=400&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/495464/original/file-20221115-13-url2je.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/495464/original/file-20221115-13-url2je.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/495464/original/file-20221115-13-url2je.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=503&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px">
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<span class="caption">Acting on compassion is interrupted when people are living with compassion fatigue or burnout.</span>
<span class="attribution"><span class="source">(Shutterstock)</span></span>
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<h2>Moral distress</h2>
<p>The symptoms of compassion fatigue include <a href="https://doi.org/10.4324/9781351030021">a changed worldview to negative, helplessness, hopelessness and disassociation from the individual in distress</a>. </p>
<p>The <a href="https://doi.org/10.1002/job.4030020205">main symptoms of burnout</a> are physical fatigue, mental and emotional exhaustion, feeling unacknowledged or unimportant and viewing the people one serves and one’s colleagues with apathy or a lack of care. </p>
<p>These symptoms can hinder a compassionate individual from acting on their emotions, creating <a href="https://books.google.ca/books?hl=en&lr=&id=ruCrBwAAQBAJ&oi=fnd&pg=PA246&dq=burnout,+compassion+fatigue,+and+moral+distress&ots=J9JcX_tkIl&sig=pOhCGRdLWz4IHh19W_Ww1ZjtqEU&redir_esc=y#v=onepage&q=burnout%2C%20compassion%20fatigue%2C%20and%20moral%20distress&f=false">moral distress</a> for employees who want to be helpful, but do not have the time, energy or fortitude to act on their sympathy. </p>
<p><strong>Employers can ignite sympathy, empathy and compassion by:</strong></p>
<ol>
<li><p>Encouraging rest for fatigued or burned-out workers. Rest is not only related to following a <a href="https://www.health.harvard.edu/topics/sleep">healthy sleep schedule</a>. It also includes actions like choosing a hard stop time for answering emails or thinking about clients’ needs each day, using allotted personal days, de-stigmatizing personal leaves for mentally or emotionally exhausted employees and having a judgement-free return to work plan. </p></li>
<li><p>Educating employees and managers about how to access organizational and local resources, such as benefits plans, crisis hotlines and mental health clinics. Rarely are individuals equipped — nor should they be — to take on the emotional and mental work of healing people who have experienced traumatic events, so knowing where help is provided can lighten the workers’ and leaders’ role. </p></li>
<li><p>Ensuring that leaders (both formal and informal) model the importance of rest by scheduling, <em>and taking</em>, breaks throughout the workday. A break could be a ten-minute solo walk around the workplace or an energizing breakfast with colleagues in the local coffee shop. </p></li>
<li><p>Managing the valuable resource — employee and manager time — thoughtfully. Every organization likely has busier and slower times in the day, week or year. Consider how your organization regards time, as <a href="https://ijoh.tums.ac.ir/index.php/ijoh/article/view/130">workload is strongly related to employee burnout</a>. For example, in schools, September and June are extremely busy as the year ramps up and slows down. Avoiding implementing new innovations at this time can help educational workers focus on building strong relationships with students and colleagues.</p></li>
<li><p>Supporting work check-in practices that provide options for leaders and employees to self-reflect on their own <a href="https://doi.org/10.1016/j.colegn.2019.07.001">mental and emotional states of mind</a>. Such reflection can include asking oneself: “Am I compelled to look away or <em>act</em>?” Are leaders or employees able to shift focus <em>from</em> hopeless worry about all the suffering they can’t relieve <em>to</em> hopeful impact by doing what they can do for each other? </p></li>
</ol>
<p>Meanwhile, if resting, taking daily breaks and investigating and accessing workplace benefits and other resources do not help with recovery from compassion fatigue or burnout, consider a longer leave of absence <a href="https://www.universityaffairs.ca/career-advice/effective-successfull-happy-academic/what-to-do-when-you-feel-just-done/">or investigate other career, job</a> or workplace options. </p>
<p>The embers of sympathy, empathy and compassion are not extinguished by compassion fatigue or burnout, but they may be temporarily muffled by stress and circumstance. These emotions can be re-ignited through finding daily actions that can support a compassionate workplace culture.</p><img src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/190489/count.gif" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" />
<p class="fine-print"><em><span>Astrid H. Kendrick receives funding from SSHRC, is a member of the Board of Directors for PHE Canada, and is the Co-Chair of the Heath Promoting Schools Collaborative for southern Alberta. </span></em></p>It’s important that employers and employees understand sympathy, empathy and compassion, and consider these emotions’ roles in both job performance and employee relations.Astrid H. Kendrick, Director, Field Experience (Community-Based), Werklund School of Education, University of CalgaryLicensed as Creative Commons – attribution, no derivatives.